DEAR ABBY: My husband and I read the letter you ran on Dec. 21 from "Dateless in Dayton." We have a ...

1. Why Successful Dating Depends On Mind Games
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I read the letter you ran on Dec. 21 from "Dateless in Dayton." We
have a few thoughts on the matter we'd like to share with him and anyone else who is having bad
luck getting responses on dating websites.
Marie, are you trying to say that single dads don't make as many sacrifices as single moms do? Do
you really have the crass to turn your life situation into a sexist thing and make that bold
comparison? How can you think a dad doing everything on his own doesn't make all the same
sacrifices as you have? This is so ridiculous i'm honestly not even sure why I've given it the attention
and response I have.
Im 22 and my boyfriend is 30 w a 4 yo child... I definitely love the man and have just recently met
the kid and hes a gem just like his pops. Buuut... My bf wants me around morning noon and night
and i can tell the kid is resenting it a little and i am terrjble w kids and terribly uncomfortable
around this young fellow and quite frankly, i dont blame him for not warranting my intrusion. Its
clear him and his dad are best buds and im the blemish. I dont know if this is something i can
handle. Maybe im too young.
I'm divorced with no kids dating a divorced man with a 4yo who I get along with brilliantly. We have
been dating for two years and he has 50/50 custody of his kid. We live together so I'm with them all
the time.
Things between me and the BF have been far from perfect, but our major problem is the ex. He
divorced her and she still loves/wants him. She refuses to acknowledge me. She will find the
dumbest excuse to talk to him. When I question their constant communication I get the whole "it's
because of our kid" defense.
Recently I found out he had been talking to her about OUR relationship problems and that really
upset me. He tells me it's because she's his best friend. He gets angry with me because I'm "jealous",
when I tell him this all upsets me.
Thank you for writting this. I really needed that lesson, well put. I also liked howyou tied all the
negatives with a positive upside of he's just being a gentleman towards babymama. I know my man
is a good man but he turns cheek towards baby mama, the vents later.
My boyfriend is amazing, he doesn't believe in someone being above someone else, we are all equal,
I am his partner who he chooses to be with and his son..is his son, his responsibility and so highly
important and special to him.
His ex (babymama) is horrible, she is literally psychotic, she is jealous and she acts aggressively, she
is abusive (verbally) she is manipulative and she USE to have my boyfriend wrapped around her
finger, running in to save her from boyfriends or fixing her problems for her.
He is reasonable and he did NOT want to be involved with his ex he was only scared for his son and
felt guilty, which we both agreed he could not fix because she has him 50% of the time and hes not
there and he cannot control what happens, better to concentrate on his own time with his son and

2. not try to control the uncontrollable (her time with him). Fight through court instead of having his
own personal life destroyed trying (and failing) to keep HER in check.