4. Principled Negotiation
• Analysis: try to diagnose the situation
• Planning: plan and come up with additional options
and additional criteria
• Discussion: the actual communication and negotiation
back and forth, looking toward agreement
5. BATNA
• Set a trap
• Objection Handling
• Figure out WHY
6. Separate the people from the
problem
1) Perception: Both sides must understand each
other’s view point. Every side’s story is
important
2) Emotion: Always acknowledge negative or
positive emotions and get to the source!
Show sympathy!
3) Communication: Focus on listening to the
other party instead of planning your next
step!
What is principled negotiation? "–two or more parties work together to best address their mutual interests with creative and objectively fair solutions
Clearly identify and list out both side's interests (use a whiteboard) and then focus on a nonjudgmental brainstorming session to come up with ways to address various interests. Don’t forget about the real issue at hand
Planning : Negotiate on the basis of objective criteria and NOT the will of either side.
- Commit yourself to reaching a solution based on principle, not pressure.
Discussion: Concentrate on the merits of the problem, not the mettle of the parties.
- Be open to reason, but closed to threats.
E.G - Cake example
1) Perception: It is easy to always assume we are right but in reality the other party assumes he/she is right too. Understanding the other side's thinking is not just about helping you solve your problem. it is the problem. Conflict lies in peoples heads, not in objective reality eg. both parties may agree that one lost the watch and the other found it, but still disagree over who should get it.
Put yourself in their shoes, don't interpret their intentions based on your fears, and never blame. Discuss each other's perceptions openly and explicitly, and look for ways to act inconsistently with the other side's perceptions (eg. acting as a partner instead of an enemy).
2) Negotitions can get tricky. It is easy to let our emotions get in the way of our goals. Sometimes, we can feel threatened or the other party may get angry which is very natural. As humans, we naturally have the desire to want to be appreciated, recognized and valued. We should always make sure make the other person feel value or recognized ( even if we sometimes don’t agree with them). Sympathize with the other party and show them you care. Bring out their human side. If we put or feelings first, we can get caught up and lose the plot of the conversation,. Negotians should be more proactive and less reactive. We are more likely
3 ) Listen. Listen Listed! Listening is a huge part of negotiation. As human beings we have the tendency to over talk and make assumptions based on our own preconceived notions. Sometimes we plan ahead and think of our own response. Conversations change all the time, and we have to plan to go with the flow. Having an effective line of communication also helps with misunderstandings, it is easy to misunderstand the other party when you are not listening properly. We should get into the habit of summarizing the other person’s point to confirming. Active listening is an important skill.
