Are you safe on the road? Understanding trauma with NLP eyes
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This document provides an overview of a workshop on understanding trauma presented by Helen Oakwater. It discusses what trauma is, different types of trauma, how trauma affects childhood development and the brain. It explains concepts like the window of tolerance, neuroception, and trauma-informed language. Tools for working with trauma are touched on, including coherent breathing, grounding techniques, and using submodalities. The document emphasizes that trauma is stored in the body and feels real in the present. References and resources on trauma are provided.
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Are you safe on the road? Understanding trauma with NLP eyes
- 1. !1 Richmond NLP Group: November 2019 Are you safe on the road? Learn how understanding ‘trauma’ can enhance your skill set, coaching practice and everyday wellbeing Helen Oakwater Coach, Trainer, Author, Explorer • What is trauma • Types of trauma • How is it created (adult & children) • Window of Tolerance (Arousal) : creation & maintenance • Neuroception • Language (negation exercise) • Resources • Frank Pucelik: Psychological Rules of War • Use of NLP to explain trauma • Oakwater schrapnel metaphor • Tools touched • Coherent Breathing (mBIT) • ENLP • Grounding • Sub-modalities • Use of Dissociation • IEMT • Metaphor www.FABparents.co.uk @HelenOakwater
- 2. !2 KNOWN / COMFORT ZONE ?? DANGEROUS TERRITORY? Learning boundary RISKY NEW UNKNO W N © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 3. What is Trauma? Psychological trauma is generally defined by two conditions. An individual experiences either: Overwhelming affect (experience of feeling or emotion) they are unable to integrate The feeling / belief that they might die or © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 4. Types of Trauma Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) e.g. Shell shock Complex Trauma Developmental Trauma Disorder (DTD) Single Incident Trauma Secondary Trauma i.e Witness / hear / live with ADULTS CHILDREN © Helen Oakwater 2017 XX
- 5. AGE DEVELOPMENT The ‘Path’ of Trauma Complex & Single Issue Trauma Normal Single Event Complex (multiple) traumas © Helen Oakwater 2017
- 6. Trauma Principles • Installed • Anchored • Brain wiring • Primitive Reptilian brain • Feels real NOW (not old historic stuff) TASTESEE HEAR SMELL FEEL Stored in body SENSORY © Helen Oakwater 2017
- 7. SINGLE EVENT © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 8. TIM sensory experience in cot SEE Darkness HEAR Shouting & slamming doors TASTE Milk & vomit SMELL Sour milk & excrement TOUCH Nappy rash FEEL Hungry & cold © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 9. The Infant Perspective One piece of sensory shrapnel One incident of NEGLECT Stored in implicit memory & sensory database © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 10. Sensory Shrapnel NEGLECT © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 11. TIM sensory experience dark night at 15 SEE sudden darkness HEAR door slam “shut up” TASTE ? SMELL ??? TOUCH Acne: Echo of Nappy Rash FEEL Cold Feet Hunger © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 12. “Our little secret” Different Maltreatments Assorted Shrapnel © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 13. FEAR EMOTIONAL ABUSE NEGLECT SEXUAL ABUSE PHYSICAL ABUSE Different Maltreatments Assorted Shrapnel © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 14. Classi- fication What was done to them Some examples What it did to them Possible interpretations Emotional Abuse Berated, insulted, compared unfavourably to others, ignored I am wrong, bad, worthless. They want me dead. I should not be alive, I’m not wanted Physical Abuse Beaten, thrashed, burned, used as ashtray, hit with chair/stick/hand/belt, locked in cupboard The world is a dangerous place, I am bad & powerless, Sexual Abuse Violated, Raped, forced to watch or participate in sexual acts Destroyed innocence. I can’t trust anyone Neglect Unfed for days, nappies not changed, no toys, no interaction with adults, left alone for hours, unwashed, no play, No self concept. I don’t matter, life is hopeless, I am helpless &/ or rage filled. Do I even exist? Chaotic environment Lots of different carers, locations, broken promises, frequent moves, squalor No safe or secure base. I am terrified. Trauma A combination of experiences and events that felt utterly overwhelming or life threatening to the child I am going to die. Reasons children are removed from their birth families 14 Table taken from Bubble Wrapped Children © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 15. !15 Limiting Beliefs HELPLESS WORTHLESS HOPELESS © Helen Oakwater 2017 I am useless I am a victim There is something fundamentally wrong with me I don’t belong I deserve the pain and suffering I’m experiencing I can’t do this, but you can Its out of my control I am bad I am the problem
- 16. TIMs Shrapnel: Much obscured by Protective Bubble Wrap © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 17. Trauma Triggered Behaviour? Observed behaviour? Window into Internal World? THEN NOW © Helen Oakwater 2017
- 18. SCORE Model Robert Dilts : www.nlpu.com Present State Desired State Resources SymptomCause Outcome Effect + = © Helen Oakwater 2017
- 19. MAGNET MAGNET www.energeticnlp.com Mother Earth Energy Universal Energy ENERGETIC NLP : Art Giser www.energeticnlp.com © Helen Oakwater 2017
- 20. (Adult) Arousal Diagram (Ogden & others) Window of Tolerance / Modulation Model Window of Tolerance Hyper / over vigilant Hypo / under vigilant ?? Dissociated?? Feel & Think Feel ?Feel? or not A R O U S A L © Helen Oakwater 2017
- 21. © Helen Oakwater 2019: Diagram Taken from Want to Adopt published 2019
- 22. !22 ANS regulates 3 physiological states Polyvagal Theory: Steven Porges 1. SOCIAL ENGAGEMENT - call for help, support & comfort from those around 2. FIGHT OR FLIGHT Aggressive Defence System 3. FREEZE OR COLLAPSE Passive Defensive System © Helen Oakwater 2017
- 24. Neuroception (Porges) Neuroception = Automatic process of constantly scanning the world for signs of danger and safety “If you don’t feel safe in your own body, you won’t feel safe anywhere” Helen Oakwater © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 25. Extract from WANT TO ADOPT by Helen Oakwater © Helen Oakwater 2019 © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 26. !26 www.traumacenter.com Trauma Center Boston USA & www.besselvanderkolk.net © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 27. !27 Smoke Detector IDENTIFYING DANGER Cook Three Brain System Watchtower © Helen Oakwater 2016 Oakwater’s diagram based on Bessel Van Der Kolk’s description in The Body Keeps The Score
- 28. !28 THALMUS “relay station” AMYGDALA threat? HIPPOCAMPUS relates new input to past experiences ANTERIOR CINGUATE coordinates emotions & thinking HYPOTHALAMUS sends stress hormones to defend against threat MEDIAL PREFRONTAL CORTEX “LOW ROAD” “HIGH ROAD”COOK SMOKE DETECTOR WATCH TOWER YES NO 0.1sec faster internal body signals external source see, hear, feel, smell, taste YES NO Has danger passed? ? ? Oakwater’s diagram based on Bessel Van Der Kolk’s description in The Body Keeps The Score “Normal” amygdala/brain Functioning © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 29. !29 THALMUS “relay station” AMYGDALA threat? HIPPOCAMPUS relates new input to past experiences ANTERIOR CINGUATE coordinates emotions & thinking HYPOTHALAMUS sends stress hormones to defend against threat MEDIAL PREFRONTAL CORTEX Cortisol Adrenaline “LOW ROAD” “HIGH ROAD”COOK SMOKE DETECTOR WATCH TOWER YES NO 0.1sec faster internal body signals external source see, hear, feel, smell, taste YESNO Has danger passed? ? ? Oakwater’s diagram based on Bessel Van Der Kolk’s description in The Body Keeps The Score “overreactive” amygdala in “traumatised” brain Possibility of “Looping” because amygdala is ‘oversensitive” due to excessive exposure to trauma. Creating “Faulty alarm system”. NO © Helen Oakwater 2016
- 30. Managing emotions better requires two approaches • TOP DOWN • strengthen capacity of watchtower to monitor body’s sensations • Mindful meditation • Yoga BOTTOM UP • recalibrate the nervous system • calm the amygdala • “reprogramme” • breath, movement, touch Grounding© Helen Oakwater 2019
- 31. 1. Regulate (you & them) 2. Relate 3. Reason Three step process “Dysregulated children in school will not learn”: Dr Bruce Perry Simple Consistent Open © Helen Oakwater 2017
- 33. !33 Frank Pucelik NLP Co-Creator Facebook & YouTube Videos © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 34. LANGUAGE: Systematic use of negation (tool used extensively by Frank Pucelik: REQUIRES PRACTICE) DIFFICULT (Negative key) POSITIVE KEY WITH NEGATION #1 SYNONYM #2 SYNONYM #3 SYNONYM BAD GOOD PERFECT TERRIFIC GREAT SCARED SAFE SECURE COURAGEOUS STRONG DEPRESSED HAPPY ENERGISED ALIVE VITAL How badly do you think this problem will interfere with your life? WHICH MEMORY SHALL I CHOOSE? ACCESSORS © Helen Oakwater 2019 © Frank Pucelik
- 36. WAR combat Elders Wise Men Respected Warriers Shaman Warriors not allowed to return to village © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 37. Rituals Sweat Lodge Drumming Dancing 10-15% died © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 38. WAR combat 4. Return to village Respected Elders, Wise Men 2. Become ‘inhuman’ Shaman THE COLLECTIVE AGREEMENT/UNDERSTANDING To protect the community men go to war. They become inhuman, violent acts & horrors. Shaman facilitates their transformation. The transformed men return to grateful community. 1. Men leave the village to fight 3. Transformation rituals for warriors. Purge. Release trauma Oakwater diagram based on work of Frank Pucelik © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 39. Psychological Combat Rules “Rules of War/Survival” 1. STOP in chaos 2. Observe, Observe, OBSERVE 3. PLAN AHEAD: What if? 4. ACT when threatened 5. NO EMOTION •Senses outside ON •Feeling inside OFF 6. Only TRUST to proven friends 7. Be UNPREDICTABLE to everyone else © Frank Pucelik © Helen Oakwater 2019
- 41. Melting Trauma: BEWARE Linguistic & Sensory Triggers “The body keeps the score” BESSEL VAN DER KOLK FEEL SAFE INSIDE THE BODY © Helen Oakwater 2017 BAD V NOT OK
- 42. Trauma /NLP useful bits mentioned during this session © Helen Oakwater 2019 Helen Interviews Robert Dilts on Logical Levels and Trauma https://youtu.be/hrK9_ZPo790 https://youtu.be/XazhuUAXhHg “Does lack of truth telling destabilise the life of a traumatised child” Helens presentation filmed at IFCO conference Sydney http://bit.ly/2I2gvrq Modalities to explore: IEMT (Intregral Eye Movement Therapy: developed by Andy Austin based on work of Steve Andreas) https://integraleyemovementtherapy.com Joanna Harper at www.integratetraining.co.uk is an excellent IEMT teacher. She has spoken at Richmond NLP and trained people in this room (including Helen). Article by Helen on “mind your language” http://bit.ly/2K9bIH4
- 43. Trauma : Some References, People © Helen Oakwater 2017 Dr Bessel Van Der Kolk The Body Keeps the Score Developmental Trauma Disorder www.traumacenter.org https://besselvanderkolk.net Dr Bruce Perry The boy who was raised as a dog Free online training www.ChildTrauma.org www.childtraumaacademy.org Peter Levine: Somatic Experiencing Healing Trauma (thin book + CD) Trauma and the body Babette Rothchild, Pat Ogden, Dan Seigel ++ Dr Gabe Mator: In the realm of the hungry ghost Addictions rooted in child trauma NICABM resources
- 44. Trauma Triggered Behaviour Helen Oakwater’s Online Course
- 47. FREE RESOURCES - articles, links, podcasts, etc LEARNING PLATFORM & TOOLS ONLINE TRAINING - various audiences FUTURE-PROOFING - evidence & thinking REAL and honest EXPERTS in various fields (coaching, leadership, communication skills, trauma, etc) LEADING LEARNER principles www.FABParents.co.uk YouTube Channel: HelenOakwater © Helen Oakwater 2019