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MY SPEECH TODAY
UNDERSTANDING THE PSYCHOLOGICAL DEVELOPMENT
OF CHILDREN, TEENAGERS AND YOUNG ADULTS.
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The Harvard Grant Study (1938-2005)
The purpose of the Grant Study was to learn
something about the conditions that
promote optimum health by following the
lives of 268 men, all Harvard graduates.
This study is one of the longest running
prospective longitudinal studies of adult
male development that has ever been
attempted.
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Key findings of the Grant Study
“The seventy-five years
and twenty million
dollars expended on the
Grant Study points, at
least, to me, to a
straightforward
conclusion:
Happiness is love.
Love conquers all.”
George E. Vaillant:
Director of the Grant
Study from 1972-2005
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Key findings of the Grant Study
“Love early in life facilitates not
only love later on but also the
other trappings of success, such
as prestige and even high
income. It also encourages the
development of coping styles
that facilitate intimacy, as
opposed to ones that
discourage it.”
George E. Vaillant:
Director of the Grant
Study from 1972-2005
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Key findings of the Grant Study
“It is the quality of a child’s
total experience, not any
particular trauma or any
particular relationship,
that exerts the clearest
influence on adult
psychopathology.”
George E. Vaillant:
Director of the Grant
Study from 1972-2005
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Other research
“The LSE research indicates
that a child’s emotional
health is far more important
to their satisfaction levels as
an adult than other factors,
such as, whether they
achieve academic success
when young, or wealth
when older.”
Lord Richard Layard:
London School of
Economics
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The impact of early love in our lives
Love in the early stages of life
literally shapes the brain and affects
us for a lifetime. It determines how
long we live and what illnesses we
will fall prey to later in life. It is no
exaggeration to say that very early
lack of love already sets the limits
on how long we will live and how
happy our lives will be. Dr. Arthur Janov
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My starting premise
Current educational systems do not align with
children’s and teenagers psychological
development goals.
They tend to focus intellectual competence.
They tend NOT to focus on LOVE and SELF-ESTEEM
or EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE.
They do not fully equip children for work life
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Emotional Intelligence
In business, people with the highest levels of
intelligence (IQ) out perform those with average
IQs only 20% of the time, while people with
average IQs outperform those with high IQs 70%
of the time.
The difference is emotional intelligence
Source: Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Bradberry and Greaves
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Emotional intelligence is not taught in schools
“We enter the workforce knowing how
to read, write and report on bodies of
knowledge, but too often, we lack the
skills to manage our emotions in the
heat of the challenging problems
we face.”
Bradberry & Greaves, Emotional Intelligence 2.0.
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Emotional Intelligence
Source: Emotional Intelligience 2.0 by Bradberry and Greaves
Self-awareness Self-management
Social-awareness
Relationship-
management
Personal
competence
Social
competence
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The Top People in Business are …
EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT
HIGHLY CREATIVE
HAVE INTELLECTUAL RIGOUR
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School systems tend to destroy creativity
98% of children display genius level
creativity at age 3-5 years. By the time they
get to 20, only 2% display genius level
creativity.
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Percentage of people with genius level
creativity by age
98%
32%
10%
2%
0%
20%
40%
60%
80%
100%
5 10 15 25
Source: Land and Jarman,
Break-point and Beyond
Age
Ego Development
Social Conditioning
Above the age of
25 only 2% of
people have
genius level
creativity
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What happens to our creativity?
The (socialization) process
restricts the natural creativity
of our thinking potential by
automatically assigning value
judgements of good, bad,
right, wrong, proper,
improper, ugly, beautiful. Our
children accept these
judgements so they can fit
into the culture.
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The abandonment of the soul
I believe it is not the socialization experience, per se, that
blocks our creativity it is the abandonment of our soul.
What we do during the first twenty-four years of our
lives is sacrifice the soul’s desire for self-expression to
meet the ego’s needs for survival, safety and security.
Only if you choose to individuate and explore the later
stages of your psychological development, can you
reconnect with your soul and its creativity.
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We start our
lives in soul
consciousness
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We move
into ego
consciousness
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Between the ages of 25 and 40 we
attempt to individuate—to align our ego
motivations with our soul motivations.
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If we learn to
master upper
stages of
psychological
development
we finish our
lives in soul
consciousness
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School systems do not prepare children for
the differentiating, individuating and self-
actualization stages of psychological
development.
The leading cause of death for 15-35 year
olds in the Western world is suicide. We
are not creating resilient young people.
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Number of suicides by age in the UK
A FAILURE TO
DIFFERENTIATE
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Number of suicides by age in the UK
A FAILURE TO
INDIVIDUATE
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Number of suicides by age in the UK
A FAILURE
TO SELF-
ACTUALIZE
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Number of suicides by age in the US
0
500
1000
1500
2000
2500
3000
3500
15-19 20-24 25-29 30-35 35-39 40-44 45-49 50-54 55-59 60-64 65-69 70-74 75-79 80-84 85+
Males Females
Self-actualizingIndividuating Integrating ServingDifferentiating
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Let’s do an exercise
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
I am going to make a series of statements.
If the statement is true for you, please
stand up.
Otherwise remain seated.
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
(Practice run)
I have a television
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
(Practice run)
I am a television
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
(Now the real thing)
I have a body
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
(Now the real thing)
I am a body
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
I have an ego
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
I am an ego
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
I have a soul
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
I am a soul
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Who are you?
EXERCISE
3 minutes
Discuss with your neighbour
1. Are you primarily an ego or are
you primarily a soul?
2. Do you have a soul or are you a soul?
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Progression in Enlightenment
1. I have a soul
2. I am a soul
3. Your soul has you
A fundamental shift in IDENTITY
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What is an Ego?
• Your ego is a field of conscious awareness
that identifies with your physical body.
Consequently, the ego believes it can die.
• The ego is not who you are. It is the mask you
wear to get your needs met in the cultural
framework of your physical three-
dimensional framework of existence. We can
call this your False self.
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What is a Soul?
Your soul is a field of conscious awareness
that identifies with your four-dimensional
energy field. It is who you really are. You
don’t have a soul; your soul has you.
Your soul is an individuated aspect of the
universal energy field from which everything
in our physical world derives its being.
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The reality of the Ego
Because the ego believes it inhabits a body
and can die it believes it has needs.
Because it believes it has needs, the ego
develops conscious and subconscious fears
about not being able to meet its needs. The
primary needs of the ego are survival,
belonging (relationships) and self-esteem.
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The reality of the Soul
Because the soul identifies with your four-
dimensional energy field and not with the
body, the soul knows it cannot die.
The soul has no needs because at the level of
reality at which it exists it instantaneously
creates through its thoughts. Because the soul
has no needs, it has no fears.
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The primary motivations of your soul are:
SELF EXPRESSION
CONNECTION
CONTRIBUTION
Why did my soul incarnate into a human body?
What are the motivations of my soul?
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WHAT HAS ALL THIS TO DO WITH
TEACHING AND SCHOOLS?
EVERYTHING
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EDUCATION SHOULD EQUIP
OUR CHILDREN FOR THEIR
SOUL JOURNEY
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Stages of Psychological Development
Surviving
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Stages of Psychological Development
INFANCY
0-2 Years Old
Staying alive!
COMPETENCY
Ability to meet basic
physiological needs.
Surviving
Stage Motivation
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Stages of Psychological Development
Conforming
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Stages of Psychological Development
Conforming
Stage Motivation
CHILDHOOD
3-7 Years Old
Keeping safe and secure!
BEING LOVED
Ability to feel accepted and
sense of belonging.
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Stages of Psychological Development
Differentiating
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Stages of Psychological Development
Differentiating
Stage Motivation
TEENAGER +
8-24Years Old
Distinguishing yourself!
CONFIDENCE
Ability to feel respected
and recognized by others.
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Stages of Psychological Development
INDIVIDUATING
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Stages of Psychological Development
INDIVIDUATING
Stage Motivation
YOUNG ADULT
25-39 Years Old
Releasing your fears!
ACCOUNTABILITY
Finding freedom and
autonomy to understand
who you really are.
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Stages of Psychological Development
SELF-ACTUALIZING
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Stages of Psychological Development
SELF-ACTUALIZING
Stage Motivation
ADULTHOOD
40-49 Years Old
Becoming who you are!
SELF-EXPRESSION
Ability to satisfy your
desire for meaning
and purpose.
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Stages of Psychological Development
INTEGRATING
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Stages of Psychological Development
INTEGRATING
Stage Motivation
MATURE ADULT
50-59 Years Old
Aligning with others!
CONNECTION
Ability to satisfy the desire
to make a difference
in your world.
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Stages of Psychological Development
SERVING
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Stages of Psychological Development
SERVING
Stage Motivation
SENIOR
60+ Years Old
Finding fulfilment!
CONTRIBUTION
Ability to satisfy your
desire to serve the
greater good.
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Stages of Psychological Development
Ego
Development
Ego-Soul Alignment
Soul
Emergence
SURVIVING
CONFORMING
DIFFERENTIATING
INDIVIDUATING
SELF-ACTUALIZING
INTEGRATING
SERVING
PSYCHOLOGICALDEVELOPMENT
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Surviving prepares you for Self-actualizing
Individuating
Integrating
Differentiating
Conforming
Surviving
Stages of Development
Serving
Self-actualizing
SOUL
EGO
Competence
Self-expressionEGO-SOUL
ALIGNMENT
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Conforming prepares you for Integrating
SOUL
EGO
Belonging
Connecting
Individuating
Integrating
Differentiating
Conforming
Surviving
Stages of Development
Serving
Self-actualizing
SOUL
EGO
EGO-SOUL
ALIGNMENT
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Differentiating prepares you for Serving
SOUL
EGO
Recognition
Contributing
Individuating
Integrating
Differentiating
Conforming
Surviving
Stages of Development
Serving
Self-actualizing
SOUL
EGO
EGO-SOUL
ALIGNMENT
64. A Values-driven School Culture
Values-based Education Purpose-driven Life
A Soul-focused Education
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Equipping Children for their Soul Journey
SELF-EXPRESSION
CONNECTION CONTRIBUTION
LEADING A VALUES-
DRIVEN LIFE
LEADING A PURPOSE-
DRIVEN LIFE
EXPRESSING UNIQUE
GIFTS AND TALENTS
66. How to Introduce Values-based
Education into a School
“A values-based
school gives
opportunities for
children to find
their meaning
and purpose, and
helps them to
sense and shape
their future.”
72. "I am happy to come to school. It gives you the option to be
yourself"
Camilla, Year 11
"Values really makes a difference. It makes the people much
nicer in the school, and the teachers too. Because we have
values, we don't have many fall outs [in the playground]"
Lucy, Year 5
"Sometimes we play Schools at home. It helps us get on
better with our brothers and sisters, and our friends and our
parents"
Connor, Year 5
What children are saying:
73. "Before Values, the playground used to be a battleground and
the teachers used to hate doing playground duty. They said
so! Now it's much better. We sort out our problems and the
teachers are more relaxed. They seem to like just talking to us
now".
Philip, Year 4
"I used to be in trouble a lot. But values make you think about
what you're doing .. Now I hardly get told off at all. And I
don't get told of so much at home either."
James, Year 4
"Thank you for starting Values Education, it has changed my
life. I used to always be in trouble. Now I am a much nicer
person"
Marcus, Year 4
74. Professor Terry Lovat
Australia
“As educational systems everywhere
search for ways of improving
academic achievement levels or all
students, as will as preparing them
with the personal, social, emotional
and moral skills required for life in
global societies, the credentials of
values-based education are without
peer.
Evidence has shown that Values-based Education
has the potential to achieve all these goals
at one and the same time.”
75. For more information and to get a copy of
this presentation go to:
www.richardbarrett.net
For information on Values-based
Education go to:
http://www.valuesbasededucation.com/