1. Bedminster • Cranford • Freehold • Hackensack • Mount Laurel • Parsippany
Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
YWCA/Elizabeth Public Library
February 22, 2018
2. DISCLAIMER
This presentation contains general information
and does not constitute legal advice.
Be sure to direct specific questions about your own
situation to an attorney.
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3. Family Law Expert Bari Z. Weinberger
• Managing Partner at Weinberger Divorce & Family Law Group.
• Certified Matrimonial Attorney.
• Author.
• Frequent Keynote Speaker.
• As seen in various media: Wall Street Journal, Smart Money,
Forbes, CBS, ABC, Access Hollywood, News Channel 12,
Huffington Post, The Star Ledger, Divorce Magazine.
• Published in New Jersey Lawyer Magazine, New Jersey Law
Journal, Matrimonial Strategist, and more.
“Bari was wonderful!! She always explained the law thoroughly. I understood every part of the process. She was
supportive, smart & professional. Everyone said “You need a shark”, I said “I need a stingray”. Bari has an
amazing combination of elegance & intelligence & can fight the fight…”
Tara M. 3
Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
4. Financial abuse is a
powerful control tactic
abusers use to keep their
victims trapped in the
abusive relationship and
isolated from friends and
family.
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5. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Abusers often tightly monitor and restrict their partner’s
spending.
Victims live a controlled life where they have been purposely put into a
position of dependence, making it extremely difficult to break free.
Financial Abuse: An Invisible Weapon
Financial abuse occurs when an abusive partner prevents their spouse
from acquiring, using or maintaining financial resources.
Abusers isolate their victims by preventing them from working or
accessing a bank, credit card or transportation.
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6. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Your paycheck is on direct deposit to an account
only your partner has access to.
Credit cards in your name have been maxed out
— and you never charged a single item to them.
You get an allowance — and it’s never enough,
even for basics like food for you and your kids.
Every penny you spend must be accounted for —
or you will pay the price.
Your partner calls and shows up at your work so
much that you are fired.
You fantasize about leaving, but feel trapped
because you don’t even have enough money for
a bus ticket.
This is financial abuse. 6
7. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Financial abuse coincides with other forms of
domestic violence:
• Physical assault
• Sexual assault
• Emotional or psychological abuse
Virtually all — 99 percent — of domestic
violence cases are affected by some form of
financial abuse.
[Source: Purple Purse/Allstate]
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9. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Are you or someone you know at risk for financial abuse?
A spouse or partner may be exerting abusive financial if he or she:
Controls how all of your family’s money is spent, forbidding your input.
Denies you access to joint accounts or has accounts titled in their name only.
Demands for you to turn over your paycheck.
Lashes out with verbal and/or physical aggression when questioned about this
arrangement.
Gives you an allowance even when you earn your own money.
Demands to see receipts to monitor your spending.
Suspicions over why certain items were purchased trigger verbal and/or
physical aggression. In their eyes, a new shirt might be proof of an affair.
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10. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
More signs of financial abuse…
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Withholds funds for you and your children to obtain basic needs such as food and
medicine.
Runs up large amounts of debt on joint credit card accounts, ruining your credit.
Forbids you from working or sabotages your work or employment opportunities
by stalking or harassing you at your workplace – or physically batters you prior to
important meetings or interviews so you can’t go.
Opens credit card accounts in your name without your knowledge or permission.
Strange bills come in the mail with your name on them, but you are forbidden
from opening them and/or threatened with violence if you do.
Falsifies IRS information provided to you to sign to hide tax inaccuracies or
falsifications.
11. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Financial Abuse Is About
Control
Financial abuse results in victims feeling insecure
and fearful about their ability to support
themselves and their children should they ever
attempt to leave their abuser.
But here’s what every victim of any form of abuse
needs to know:
You can get out and get
your children out.
You can be safe.
You can get the money you
need to live. 1
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13. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Make your exit plan.
In the upheaval of leaving your abusive situation, an organized
strategy is key for making your resolve stick.
Download our free Domestic Violence Safety Plan to start
gathering together important phone numbers, address and
names of “safe people” to give you help and domestic
violence shelters in your area that you can access in an
emergency.
Download your safety plan: http://bit.ly/dv-safety-plan
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14. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Document your financial situation.
Gather important financial and personal documents such
as copies of bank statements that you are able to
access, pay stubs, tax forms, birth and marriage
certificates, etc.
Store your Safety Plan and documents with trusted
friends or family or in another secret, safe location
outside of your home.
Your documents will be helpful for filing in court.
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15. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Create an emergency fund.
Every week, one woman returned one item of food
to the grocery store that she knew her husband
didn’t like, so wouldn’t notice it was gone. The few
dollars she saved up each week eventually added
up to her bus ticket to freedom.
You can also ask a close friend or trusted relative
if they could help out in any way — from a
monetary loan for food and clothing to a couch to
sleep on.
Keep money in a safe location.
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16. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
File for temporary support.
Victims may not realize they can petition the courts for
temporary alimony and temporary child support.
Alimony can help you maintain your same standard of living by
paying for your rent, for example, or paying for other costs you
may need to achieve financial independence, such as paying to
attend school or for job training.
Child support can help with costs related to your children’s
needs such as food and clothing.
You do not need to file for divorce to obtain temporary
support and you do NOT need to communicate with your
abuser each week/month to get access to the money.
Make an appointment at a family law firm that offers free
consultations. At your meeting, ask the lawyer provide you with
information about how to apply for support.
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17. Not married to your abuser?
If your abuser is also your children’s parent, you can file for
child support regardless of marital status.
To access income that your partner forced you to deposit
your paycheck, the courts can help you gain access to what
is rightfully yours.
Speak with an attorney about the best course to follow.
Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
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18. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Cut off access.
If your abuser has been using a credit card issued only to
you without your authorization, call your credit card
companies and ask them to give you new account
numbers.
Change all your passwords for all your accounts, including
your email, and all obvious financial accounts that are in
your name.
Be sure to replace with passwords that no one can easily
hack.
Source: Karin Price Mueller, founder of NJMoneyHelp.com and Bamboozled columnist for The Star-Ledger/NJ.com 1
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19. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Assess your credit.
Check your credit reports at AnnualCreditReport.com.
You can do this once a year for free. If you find
something that shouldn't be there, you can dispute
the account.
Consider putting a “credit freeze” on your reports.
This would mean that no one without a PIN would be
able to obtain a credit card or open loans in your
name.
If you personally decide to get new credit, you'll need
the PIN, too, so keep it in a safe place. In New
Jersey, this is free to do.
Source: Karin Price Mueller, founder of NJMoneyHelp.com and Bamboozled columnist for The Star-Ledger/NJ.com 1
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20. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Establish credit in your own name.
If you have no credit card in your own name,
apply for one, even if it has a very low limit to
start.
Make small purchases and pay them off
religiously in order to build your credit. Having
credit can be a lifeline in an emergency.
If you do this before you leave, consider getting
any correspondence sent to a family member’s
address.
Source: Karin Price Mueller, founder of NJMoneyHelp.com and Bamboozled columnist for The Star-Ledger/NJ.com 2
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21. Apply for IRS Innocent Spouse Relief.
A victim spouse may sign their taxes without
knowing
their abuser has provided the IRS with faulty or
fraudulent information. If money is owed to the
IRS, the victim may be able to claim Innocent
Spouse Relief.
• An “innocent spouse” is a taxpayer who did not
know their spouse understated or underpaid
their income tax liability.
• If a taxpayer qualifies as an innocent spouse,
the IRS may suspend all tax liability or only
hold the innocent spouse responsible for their
share of the tax bill.
Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
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22. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Help with employment and rental
applications.
If you need to submit a rental application or go
through an employment background check, financial
abuse can unfairly create a past that is difficult to
explain.
When you work with an attorney, you can give the
attorney permission to be a point of contact for
potential employers or landlords to explain your
situation.
This can be help in overcoming negative credit or
lack of credit.
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24. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For
Advocates
Obtaining a NJ Restraining
Order
Depending on your situation, you
can request for the courts to grant
you a temporary restraining order
against your spouse or partner to
prevent your abuser from
contacting you anywhere,
including at your job.
(Printout available.)
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25. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
Domestic Violence is the occurrence of
one or more of the following acts committed against
a victim:
• Assault
• Burglary
• Criminal mischief
• Criminal restraint
• Terroristic threats
• Criminal sexual contact
• Criminal trespass
• False imprisonment
• Harassment
• Kidnapping
• Lewdness
• Sexual assault
• Stalking
• Homicide
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26. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
What can a restraining order do?
The abuser can be ordered not to have any contact
with you -- in person or by phone, at home or work,
and elsewhere.
The court can order the abuser to leave the house or
apartment you share, even if it is in the abuser’s
name.
The court may order the abuser to pay for costs that
resulted from the abuse, for example: household bills
that are due right away, medical/dental treatment,
moving expenses and loss of earnings.
The judge can also make the abuser pay your
attorney’s fees, and can make the abuser pay
damages to you or other people that helped you or
got hurt by the abuser.
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27. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
A Guide for Domestic Violence Victims in New Jersey
Free E-Book: www.WLG.com/dv
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29. Rebuilding After Financial Abuse: A Workshop For Advocates
1. Make a Plan
2. Make an Exit
3. Get Support
4. Get Protection
5. Start Rebuilding!
New Jersey Domestic Violence
Hotline (800) 572-SAFE (7233)
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30. Bedminster • Cranford • Freehold • Hackensack • Mount Laurel • Parsippany
WeinbergerLawGroup.com
(888) 888-0919
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