I was one of seven people asked to talk for seven minutes at the MarketingProfs Social Media Conference in Seattle. I tried to share some of the entertaining things I have heard from previous bosses over the years. Some of them will hit close to home....

1. Stuff
my
boss
says…

2. WARNING: For entertainment purposes only.
This collection of anecdotes does not reflect the
comments of my current boss...

3. I market
software to
guys like
this…

4. Have you
heard…

5. Chad Ochocinco has
3.3 million followers…

6. How can we get that many?

7. I just read in Wall St. Journal about
***insert hot social site
from 6 months ago***

8. Ever heard of this social media expert
*** insert your name here ***

9. It is all
about social

10. Blogging is a priority…
I’m committed to posting weekly…

11. One month later…

12. Could the intern
to ghost write for me?

13. “Can’t we just…”

14. Can’t you just tell Matthew T. Grant
to write about us?

15. Can’t we get the interns to post it in a
bunch of LinkedIn groups…

16. Follow the leaders…

17. Google didn’t need a PR firm…

18. And Steve Jobs didn’t need
market research…

19. How hard can it be?

20. Our marketing would improve if we
had a Silicon Valley office…

21. The intern has a great idea on how to
make us a hypersocial business

22. URGENT!

23. Our Wikipedia page
got blocked again...

24. We need to figure out how
to make our business go viral

25. Finally…
When all else fails….

26. We need more leads ...
when are those MBA student
consultants coming back in?

27. Thank you
Frank Days
VP Marketing, Correlsense
Recovering social media director
Marketing Agility Podcast
@tangyslice