1. You’re my Friend

2. I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against anyone who made you sad. When you are sad...

3. I'll try to dislodge whatever is choking you. When you are blue…

4. I will tease you about it every chance I get. When you are scared, ...

5. I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be so stop whinging. When you are worried...

6. I will use little words to explain it to you. When you are confused... When you are sick… stay away from me until you're well again. I don't want whatever you have.

7. I'll know you finally got wise. When you smile...

8. I will point and laugh at your clumsiness. This is my oath; I pledge 'till the end. Why you may ask? Because you're my friend! When you fall, ...