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How to survive adolescence
Teen Relationships
 What: Skills for developing healthy relationships
 Why: Life-long Learning, Communication,
Responsible Citizen, Problem Solving
Healthy Relationships
What Makes a Healthy
Relationship?
1. Mutual Respect
Respect in a relationship means that each
person values who the other is and
understands the other person’s
boundaries.
What Makes a Healthy
Relationship?
2. Trust
What Makes a Healthy
Relationship?
3. Honesty
It’s tough to trust someone
who isn’t being honest.
If you have ever caught
someone you trust in a lie…
it is difficult to believe that
person the next time they
tell you something.
What Makes a Healthy
Relationship?
4. Support
It’s not just in bad times that others around you should
support you. In a healthy relationship, the person is
there with a shoulder to cry on when things are tough
AND to celebrate when things are good.
What Makes a Healthy
Relationship?
5. Separate identities
In healthy relationships:
 Everyone needs to make compromises.
 You each have your own life (family, friends, interests,
hobbies) and that shouldn’t change.
 Don’t pretend to like something you don’t, or give up
things you love.
 You are free to keep developing new talents or
interests, making new friends, and moving forward.
What Makes a Healthy
Relationship?
6. Good communication
Be open & honest about your feelings and what is
going on with you. Saying, “Nothing is wrong” when
there really is causes miscommunication. Never keep a
feeling bottled up because you’re worried it’s not what
the other person wants to hear or you worry about
sounding silly.
It you need time to think things out… just ask for it. The
right person will give you time.
The Big Break-Up…
 Let It Out
Share your feelings. Some people find that sharing
their feelings with someone they trust helps. Talking
over how you feel can help. If you feel like someone
can't relate to what you're going through, find
someone more sympathetic to talk to. (Sharing
feelings can be tough for guys, but you can talk with a
friend or family member, a teacher, or counselor.
Maybe a female family member or friend, like an older
sister or a neighbor, to talk to.)
The Big Break-Up…
 Don't be afraid to cry. Going through a break-up can
be really tough, and getting some of those raw
emotions out can be a big help. This is another tough
one for guys, but there's no shame in crying now and
then. No one has to see you do it — you don't have to
start blubbering in class or at soccer practice or
anything. Just a find a place where you can be alone,
like crying into your pillow at night or in the shower
when you're getting ready for the day.
What Can I Do?
 Be Kind to Yourself
 Remember what's good about you. This one is really
important. Sometimes people with broken hearts start to blame
themselves for what's happened. They may be really down on
themselves, exaggerating their faults as though they did
something to deserve the unhappiness they're experiencing. If
you find this happening to you, nip it in the bud! Remind
yourself of your good qualities, and if you can't think of them
because your broken heart is clouding your view, get your friends
to remind you.
 Take good care of yourself. A broken heart can be very
stressful so don't let the rest of your body get broken too. Get lots
of sleep, eat healthy foods, and exercise regularly to minimize
stress and depression and give your self-esteem a boost.
What Can I Do?
 Do the things you normally enjoy. Whether it's seeing a movie or
going to a concert, do something fun to take your mind off the negative
feelings for a while.
 Keep yourself busy. Sometimes this is difficult when you're coping
with sadness and grief, but it really helps. This is a great time to
redecorate your room or try a new hobby. That doesn't mean you
shouldn't think about what happened — working things through in
our minds is all part of the healing process — it just means you should
focus on other things too.
 Give yourself time. It takes time for sadness to go away. Almost
everyone thinks they won't feel normal again, but the human spirit is
amazing — and the heartbreak almost always heals after a while. But
how long will that take? That depends on what caused your heartbreak,
how you deal with loss, and how quickly you tend to bounce back from
things. Getting over a break-up can take a couple of days to many weeks
— and sometimes even months.
Unhealthy Relationship?
 Look for the signs:
 Changeable – changing like the weather or playing
games
 Controlling
 Emotional manipulation – jealousy, guilt trip
 Consistently puts other things or people first
 Dismissive of your feelings
 Brings you down instead of lifts you up
Look for the signs:
 Is the person mean, disrespectful, controlling, or abusive?
 Does the person get angry if you don’t drop everything for
him or her?
 Keep you from seeing friends or talking to other guys or
girls?
 Try to talk you into something you don’t want to do?
These are warning signs. Do NOT stay in a relationship that
involves abusive behavior of any kind. This includes
physical, verbal, and emotional abuse.
Make Good Choices…
Consequences…
You get to make your own choices,
but you don’t usually get to choose
the consequences of choices.

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Teen relationships!

  • 1. How to survive adolescence
  • 2. Teen Relationships  What: Skills for developing healthy relationships  Why: Life-long Learning, Communication, Responsible Citizen, Problem Solving
  • 4. What Makes a Healthy Relationship? 1. Mutual Respect Respect in a relationship means that each person values who the other is and understands the other person’s boundaries.
  • 5. What Makes a Healthy Relationship? 2. Trust
  • 6. What Makes a Healthy Relationship? 3. Honesty It’s tough to trust someone who isn’t being honest. If you have ever caught someone you trust in a lie… it is difficult to believe that person the next time they tell you something.
  • 7. What Makes a Healthy Relationship? 4. Support It’s not just in bad times that others around you should support you. In a healthy relationship, the person is there with a shoulder to cry on when things are tough AND to celebrate when things are good.
  • 8. What Makes a Healthy Relationship? 5. Separate identities In healthy relationships:  Everyone needs to make compromises.  You each have your own life (family, friends, interests, hobbies) and that shouldn’t change.  Don’t pretend to like something you don’t, or give up things you love.  You are free to keep developing new talents or interests, making new friends, and moving forward.
  • 9. What Makes a Healthy Relationship? 6. Good communication Be open & honest about your feelings and what is going on with you. Saying, “Nothing is wrong” when there really is causes miscommunication. Never keep a feeling bottled up because you’re worried it’s not what the other person wants to hear or you worry about sounding silly. It you need time to think things out… just ask for it. The right person will give you time.
  • 10. The Big Break-Up…  Let It Out Share your feelings. Some people find that sharing their feelings with someone they trust helps. Talking over how you feel can help. If you feel like someone can't relate to what you're going through, find someone more sympathetic to talk to. (Sharing feelings can be tough for guys, but you can talk with a friend or family member, a teacher, or counselor. Maybe a female family member or friend, like an older sister or a neighbor, to talk to.)
  • 11. The Big Break-Up…  Don't be afraid to cry. Going through a break-up can be really tough, and getting some of those raw emotions out can be a big help. This is another tough one for guys, but there's no shame in crying now and then. No one has to see you do it — you don't have to start blubbering in class or at soccer practice or anything. Just a find a place where you can be alone, like crying into your pillow at night or in the shower when you're getting ready for the day.
  • 12. What Can I Do?  Be Kind to Yourself  Remember what's good about you. This one is really important. Sometimes people with broken hearts start to blame themselves for what's happened. They may be really down on themselves, exaggerating their faults as though they did something to deserve the unhappiness they're experiencing. If you find this happening to you, nip it in the bud! Remind yourself of your good qualities, and if you can't think of them because your broken heart is clouding your view, get your friends to remind you.  Take good care of yourself. A broken heart can be very stressful so don't let the rest of your body get broken too. Get lots of sleep, eat healthy foods, and exercise regularly to minimize stress and depression and give your self-esteem a boost.
  • 13. What Can I Do?  Do the things you normally enjoy. Whether it's seeing a movie or going to a concert, do something fun to take your mind off the negative feelings for a while.  Keep yourself busy. Sometimes this is difficult when you're coping with sadness and grief, but it really helps. This is a great time to redecorate your room or try a new hobby. That doesn't mean you shouldn't think about what happened — working things through in our minds is all part of the healing process — it just means you should focus on other things too.  Give yourself time. It takes time for sadness to go away. Almost everyone thinks they won't feel normal again, but the human spirit is amazing — and the heartbreak almost always heals after a while. But how long will that take? That depends on what caused your heartbreak, how you deal with loss, and how quickly you tend to bounce back from things. Getting over a break-up can take a couple of days to many weeks — and sometimes even months.
  • 14. Unhealthy Relationship?  Look for the signs:  Changeable – changing like the weather or playing games  Controlling  Emotional manipulation – jealousy, guilt trip  Consistently puts other things or people first  Dismissive of your feelings  Brings you down instead of lifts you up
  • 15. Look for the signs:  Is the person mean, disrespectful, controlling, or abusive?  Does the person get angry if you don’t drop everything for him or her?  Keep you from seeing friends or talking to other guys or girls?  Try to talk you into something you don’t want to do? These are warning signs. Do NOT stay in a relationship that involves abusive behavior of any kind. This includes physical, verbal, and emotional abuse.
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  • 18. Consequences… You get to make your own choices, but you don’t usually get to choose the consequences of choices.