How to get what you want from every email you send - webinar slideshow

How to Get What
You What From
Every Email You
Send
webinar
Steuart Snooks
CEO, Solutions for Success
www.emailtiger.com.au

How to Write
Effective Email
Communications
Help! Where Should I Keep
All This Email (and find it
again quickly later)?
Constant E-mail
Interruptions &
multi-tasking – is
there a better way?
Introduction to Email
Overload and What You
Can Do About it
How to Get What You
Want From Every
Email You Send
An Empty In-box:
Is it possible (or
even desirable)?
Why you should
NOT check email
first thing in the
morning!
Email Mastery
Webinar Series
Solutions for Success 2013 www.emailtiger.com.au
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How to Get What You What
From Every E-mail You Send
This webinar shows you how to;
•understand the communication style of the person you’re
communicating with
•diagnose the language and key words in a message
•identify the emotion and tone and of an e-mail
•respond with genuine understanding, insight and persuasiveness
•create agreement and overcome conflict
•influence and persuade others to achieve the outcomes you desire
•create stronger rapport, trust and responsiveness in your e-mail
conversations

The Challenge of Email
Communications
Research suggests 80% of business
communication is now handled via email

Communications
Email has replaced face-to-face and phone
conversations

Communications
Email has replaced face-to-face and phone
conversations
Email has no signals, clues or feedback such as eye
contact, body language or voice tone

What are your
biggest frustrations
when sending
email?
Type your answer in the chat box

From Every Email You Send
All language and communication is an
attempt to persuade or influence someone.
There is no neutral language.

There is always a desired outcome –
to be respected, understood, agreed
with or just listened to

There is always a desired outcome –
to be respected, understood, agreed
with or just listened to
We use language to get what we want (if used
well) or what we don’t want (if not used well)

3 Keys Strategies

3 Keys Strategies
1: Identify communication style

3 Keys Strategies
2: Identify tone of message

3 Keys Strategies
3: Identify offset words that
break rapport & trust

The 4 Communciation Styles
Visual Auditory
Kinesthetic Digital

Visual Auditory
Kinesthetic Digital
• Process/organize through vision:
what they ‘see’
• Speak at fast pace
• Memorise by seeing pictures
• Less distracted by noise

Visual Auditory
Kinesthetic Digital
what they ‘see’
• Process/organize through
sound: what they ‘hear’
• Speak at more deliberate pace
• Absorb information by listening
• Very sensitive to sound

Visual Auditory
Kinesthetic Digital
what they ‘see’
• Process/organize through sense:
what they ‘touch/taste/smell/feel’
• Speak at a deliberate pace
• Memorise by experiental activity
• Transform input into feelings and
sensations

Visual Auditory
Kinesthetic Digital
what they ‘see’
• Process/organize through sense:
what they ‘touch/taste/smell/feel’
• Speak at a deliberate pace
• Memorise by experiental activity
• Transform input into feelings and
sensations
• Process/organize through what
makes sense in their head’
• Speak in a monotone
• Process information in their head
• Can lack emotion

The Visual Communciator
Visual word choices Visual phrases
Clear
View
See
Vision
Show
Appear
Sight
Picture
Read
Diagram
Blind
Horizon
Illuminate
Clarify
Notice
Highlight
Glance
Dim
Imagine
Look to the future
Paint a picture
Can you see my . . . ?
See you later
Let’s focus on the job
A sight for sore eyes
This is my vision
Let me make to crystal clear
Can you picture that?
This will shed some light on the issue
Outlook
Vanish
Disappear
Scan
Reveal
Gaze
Glimpse
Sightsee
Expose
Faced
Observed
Enlighten
Vivid
Bright
Visualise
Blurred
Fuzzy
Hindsight
Preview

The Auditory Communciator
Auditory word choices Auditory phrases
Hear
Tell
Talk
Speak
Voice
Sound
Silence
Announce
Yell
Roar
Debate
Discuss
Conversation
Translate
Request
Mention
Gossip
Shall we discuss
Did you hear me
Sounds good to me
Hold your tongue
Loud and clear
In a manner of speaking
Let’s talk this over
Voice an opinion
That resonates with me
Listen to this
Keep an ear open
Phrase
Divulge
Earful
Listen
Undertones
Recite
Tune
Noisy
Rumour
Outspoken
Remark
Echo
Proclaim
Harmonise
Call
Shout
Resonate
Auditory word choices Auditory phrases

The Kinesthetic Communciator
Kinesthetic word choices Kinesthetic phrases
Feel
Felt
Grab
Scrape
Touch
Hold
Grasp
Walk
Stiff
Soft
Hard
Smooth
Strong
Calm
Handle
Solid
Pressure
My gut feeling
I grasp the idea now
I’m not following you
Get in touch with
Start from scratch
Come to grips with
It’s a pain in the neck
Hot headed
I’m getting a handle on it
I was touched
I sensed that
I had a feeling
That’s a solid idea
She’s cool, calm and collected
Explore the possibilities
Sharp
Dry
Thick
Tremble
Warm
Exciting
Stress
Stretch
Slip
Strain
Concrete
Anxious
Sensitive
Hurt
Clumsy
Contact
Bearable

The Digital Communciator
Digital word choices Digital phrases
Feel
Felt
Grab
Scrape
Touch
Hold
Grasp
Walk
Stiff
Soft
Hard
Smooth
Strong
Calm
Handle
Solid
Pressure
I’ll think about it
It doesn’t make sense
Let me consider your proposal
Interpret the data
Calculate the outcome
I understand the problem
Where’s the logic
We need to factor in . . .
Review the facts
What’s the bottom line
Do a complete study
What are your thoughts?
Going round in my head
Sharp
Dry
Thick
Tremble
Warm
Exciting
Stress
Stretch
Slip
Strain
Concrete
Anxious
Sensitive
Hurt
Clumsy
Contact
Bearable

What is your
predominant
communication
style?
Poll

Building trust & rapport
Affirmative Imperative
Tentative Negative
One of the most important tools for
generating trust and rapport in email
conversations is ‘backtracking’ or
‘mirroring’.

Building trust & rapport
Tentative Negative
One of the most important tools for
generating trust and rapport in email
conversations is ‘backtracking’ or
‘mirroring’.
This is the process of identifying key
words and language used by the
sender and then using these in
your response.

Mirroring language to build rapport
Visual Rapport
Visual mis-match
Jeff: “How does that proposal look to you?”
Vera: “It looks great”
Geoff: “From what I can see, that should work”
Clare: “Looks like it to me too”
Jeff: “How does that proposal look to you?”
Vera: “I feel it’s okay”
Geoff: “From what I can see, that should work”
Clare: “It seems solid to me”

Auditory Rapport
Auditory mis-match
Jeff: “How does that proposal sound to you?”
Vera: “It sounds great”
Geoff: “That idea resonates with me”
Clare: “I hear what you’re saying”
Jeff: “How does that proposal sound to you?”
Vera: “It feels about right”
Geoff: “I’m not sure you’ve heard enough about it”
Clare: “I saw the whole presentation”

Kinesthetic Rapport
Kinesthetic mis-match
Jeff: “How does that proposal feel to you?”
Vera: “It is very solid”
Geoff: “Are you sure you have a handle on it”
Clare: “Yes, I have a good feel for it”
Jeff: “How does that proposal feel to you?”
Vera: “It looks fine”
Geoff: “I’m not sure you’re in touch with recent events”
Clare: “I can picture what’s been happening”

Digital Rapport
Digital mis-match
Jeff: “What do you think of the proposal”
Vera: “I think it’s excellent”
Geoff: “Are you sure you understand the scope of this project?”
Clare: “I comprehend the details”
Jeff: “What do you think of the proposal”
Vera: “It sounds good”
Geoff: “Are you sure you understand the scope of this project?”
Clare: “Yes, I’ve got a good feel for it”

Identifying key words & language
John,
It’s been very frustrating dealing with your customer service team and I’m not
satisfied with the answers they been giving. I thought that your customer service
would provide great support to the product I bought from you and that you would
be there to help me when needed.
Yours truly,
Derek Killen

John,
It’s been very frustrating dealing with your customer service team and I’m not
satisfied with the answers they been giving. I thought that your customer service
would provide great support to the product I bought from you and that you would
be there to help me when needed.
Yours truly,
Derek Killen
Dear Derek,
I appreciate you making contact about this and my apologies for the frustration
you have felt. I can assure you that we are committed to support you with all the
help you require. I will investigate the matter personally and make sure that our
future responses meet your satisfaction.
Thanks again for bringing this to my attention.
John Smith
Identifying key words & language

The Tone of an Email
Tentative Negative

Tentative Negative
Affirmative

Tentative Negative

Tentative Negative
Tentative

Tentative Negative
Tentative Negative

Tentative Negative
Can, permit,
decide, want,
choose,
desire,
opportunity,
commitment

Tentative Negative
Can, permit,
decide, want,
choose,
desire,
opportunity,
commitment
Must, need,
should, ought,
supposed, got
to, have to,
it’s time,
necessary

Tentative Negative
Can, permit,
decide, want,
choose,
desire,
opportunity,
commitment
Must, need,
should, ought,
supposed, got
to, have to,
it’s time,
necessary
Maybe,
probably,
deserve, wish,
may, might,
could, prefer,
had better

Tentative Negative
Can, permit,
decide, want,
choose, desire,
opportunity,
commitment
Must, need,
should, ought,
supposed, got
to, have to, it’s
time, necessary
Maybe,
probably,
deserve, wish,
may, might,
could, prefer,
had better
Can’t, doesn’t,
won’t,
impossible,
unable,
problem, no
intention,
choose not to

Using Invitation Phrases
Helps to change tone
When tone is
affirmative
or positive,
that’s great.

When tone is
affirmative
or positive,
that’s great.
When tone is imperative,
negative or tentative, use
invitational phrases to ‘open
up’ the communication.

When tone is
affirmative
or positive,
that’s great.
When tone is imperative,
negative or tentative, use
invitational phrases to ‘open
up’ the communication.
Invitational phrases allow your message
to be received without pressure and gives
people the feeling of having a choice.

I invite you to consider . . .

Can I suggest that . . .

What if we were to . . .

Would it be a good idea to . . .

Is it possible to . . .

How about we . . .

How about we . . .
If you could choose . . .

“When dealing with people,
remember you are not dealing
with creatures of logic, but
creatures of emotion”
Dale Carnegie
Creating agreement via Email

When you have HIGH
trust in a relationship
or communication,
what else tends to
happen?
Poll

The Speed of Trust
Stephen Covey Jnr
TRUST
COST
SPEED
• High
• Low
• High
When trust is HIGH, communications are easy,
fast, effective and cheap

The Speed of Trust
Stephen Covey Jnr
When trust is LOW, communications are
challenging, slow, ineffective and expensive

“Our conversations either create
trust and rapport or destroy it”

“Our conversations either create
trust and rapport or destroy it”
“We can be right or we can be happy”

Offset Words
Words that break trust and rapport

Offset Words
But
“Your hair looks nice but it’s really short now”
“Thanks for filling in the application but . . . ”

Offset Words
But
“Your hair looks nice but it’s really short now”
“Thanks for filling in the application but . . . ”
However
“This is a great opportunity, however your service is new
and unproven”
“I’d love to come along to your meeting, however . . . ”

How to have your views understood
A simple word that makes all the difference
“Tact is the art of making a point
without making an enemy”

And
•Allows validity to both points of view

And
•Allows discussion rather than argument

And
•Allows your view to be heard rather than resisted

And
•Allows your view to be heard rather than resisted
“Jenny, that report looks good and we require it by Friday”
“Your proposal is great John and let’s add some more data”
“Ben, your sales results are on track and we need further
improvement next month”

Summary
• respond appropriately, mirroring key words and
language

Summary
language
• respond using invitational phrases

Summary
language
• respond using invitational phrases
3: Identify offset words that break rapport & trust
• respond using ‘and’ to get your point of view
across without resistance

Ask me a question . . .
Ask your question by typing in chat box
OR
Click the hand icon

How to Write
Effective Email
Communications
Help! Where Should I Keep
All This Email (and find it
again quickly later)?
Constant E-mail
Interruptions &
multi-tasking – is
there a better way?
Introduction to Email
Overload and What You
Can Do About it
How to Get What You
Want From Every
Email You Send
An Empty In-box:
Is it possible (or
even desirable)?
Why you should
NOT check email
first thing in the
morning!
Email Mastery
Webinar Series








What can you do next?

Conference presentations
E-mail audits/surveys
Consulting & advice
Keynote speaking
Research papers
Workshops
Blog posts
Audio CDs
Webinars
Seminars
Coaching
E-books
Articles
Ideas
Tips

Conference presentations
E-mail audits/surveys
Consulting & advice
Keynote speaking
Research papers
Workshops
Blog posts
Audio CDs
Webinars
Seminars
Coaching
E-books
Articles
Ideas
Tips
Steuart G. Snooks
Email Strategist & Expert

What has been the
single most valuable
idea for you today?
(or any other feedback)
Type your answer in the chat box

How to get what you want from every email you send - webinar slideshow

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How to get what you want from every email you send - webinar slideshow