Map Your Values: Connect & Collaborate
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Why do you get out of bed every day? Why do you go to work? When it comes down to it, what’s really important to you? Understanding what makes you tick can have a transformative impact on your life, improving your sense of agency and leading a more fulfilling life. Understanding what makes those around you tick can have a transformative impact on your relationships, enabling you to communicate and collaborate more effectively. In this workshop, you’ll learn how to map your values and practice communicating them effectively to each other. You’ll examine what happens when your values are compromised, prioritise them, and compare them to your organisation’s values. Finally, you’ll consider how you can increase the chances of fulfilling your values. Participants may want to bring their notebooks, and something to take pictures with.
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Map Your Values: Connect & Collaborate
- 1. Map Your Values Connect & Collaborate by: Steve Purkis & Tony Piper P3X 2018
- 2. Image © Steve Purkis Hi, I’m Steve
- 3. Image © Steve Purkis Workshop Goals Session Learning Goals Intro What are values? Why are they important 10 min Part 1: Map Values Learn a technique to define your values. 15 min Part 2: Have & Have Not Practice communicating your values, and understanding others’ values in a safe way. 30 min Part 3: Application Consider how to use your values in different scenarios, and their relative priority. 20 min Part 4: Compare Practice comparing your values to others’. 10 min
- 4. Image © Steve Purkis Provided: ● Deck of 50x Value Cards ● Stickies ● Pens Not Provided: ● Camera / Phone: to take pictures. ○ Turn ringer + notifications off. ● Notebooks Not Required: ● Laptops What You’ll Need… Value CardsValue CardsValue CardsValue Cards Look for actions.
- 5. Image © Steve Purkis Once upon a time…
- 11. tonypiper.coach
- 12. Image: https://pixabay.com/en/chin-ups-sport-strength-training-3746910/ Expressing them Feeling understood Adjusting until it felt right
- 13. What are values?
- 14. “Values are beliefs linked inextricably to affect.” - Shalom Schwartz https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/affect Touch the feelings of; move emotionally motivate & guide behaviours
- 15. Happiness is the result of living your values. - Shalom Schwartz
- 16. Roger Delves
- 17. Why is this important?
- 18. Emotional Intelligence- Daniel Goleman Self-Regulation People SkillsSelf-Awareness Empathy
- 19. If one of you walks out of here more aware of this stuff and better equipped to deal with it, I’ll be happy. Why am I here?
- 20. Workshop
- 21. Image © Steve Purkis Caveats… This can change you. Sharing may feel uncomfortable. Potential for conflict.
- 22. Be respectful. No judgement. Confidential. Code of Conduct
- 24. Sort Sort the value cards into two groups: 5 min Value CardsValue CardsValue CardsValue Cards ~10s / card Value CardsValue CardsValue CardsValue Cards More Important Less Important
- 25. Tidy Clear away the Less Important cards. 30s
- 26. Group Related Values Organise the remaining cards into columns of related values. As a guide, create up to 6 columns. 5 min Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Card Group 1 Group 2 Group 3 (6 is not a hard limit)
- 27. For each column, choose one card that best represents the group. Move it to the top of the column. Top Cards 2 min Top Card Card Card Card Top Card Top Card Card Top Card Card Card Card Top Card Card Card Top Card Card Group 1 Group 2 Group 3 Have a better name? Write it on a sticky!
- 28. Individual Reflection Do you notice any patterns about your groups? If so, do they carry any significance? Do the Top Cards reflect what’s important to you? Is anything missing? 2 min Summarise your thoughts.
- 29. Take a picture of your groups. Keep your Top Cards, and clear the rest away. Tidy 1 min
- 30. Part Two Have & Have Not
- 31. Explorers Explore your values! Practice communicating them.
- 32. Listeners LISTEN to your partner. Aim to understand their values. Try not to interpret meaning. NO JUDGEMENT.
- 33. Listening is Hard Work! https://sankieblogger.wordpress.com/2016/01/19/the-birthdayproject/chinese-character-for-listen/
- 34. Pair up Introduce yourselves Agree who’s going to Explore, and who’s going to Listen first We’ll swap later. 1 min
- 35. Get Ready Put your cards out 1 min
- 36. Have “When you have <value>, what kind of <value> is that?” 3 min Listen. 3x “Pick a card...”
- 37. Have: Reflect in Pairs 1 min Summarise key points of your conversation.
- 38. “How would that affect you?” Have Not “When there’s no <value>, what happens?” 3 min Listen. “Pick a card and cover it.” 3x
- 39. Have Not: Reflect in Pairs 1 min Summarise key points of your conversation.
- 41. Share Reflections with Workshop Share: one insight in 2-3 words. 5 min
- 42. When Core Values are Fulfilled Happy!
- 43. When Core Values are Compromised Strong physical or emotional response
- 44. Next time... Which value was compromised?
- 45. Ouch, my Amygdala! Limbic System: Emotion Center https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:1511_The_Limbic_Lobe.jpg
- 46. Less Important More Important WeakerStronger Emotional Response
- 49. How will your values help you deal with these situations? Discuss how your values will guide what you do. Prioritise them in order of impact. Context
- 50. Pair up Introduce yourselves Agree who’s going to Explore, and who’s going to Listen first Swap after each scenario. 1 min
- 51. Scenario #1 You’re halfway to the airport, on your way to an important meeting when you realise you’ve forgotten your laptop. Turning back now means you may miss your flight. Going without it means you’ll be unprepared. 2 min Discuss how your values will guide what you do. Prioritise them in order of impact.
- 52. Swap Roles 30s
- 53. Scenario #2 You’re in the middle of something urgent at work, when a good friend calls. When you pick up to tell them you’re busy, they sound upset. You can’t tell what’s wrong as the phone keeps cutting out. 2 min Discuss how your values will guide what you do. Prioritise them in order of impact.
- 54. Swap Roles 30s
- 55. Scenario #3 Your team is discussing what to do next. You have a great idea to share, but people keep ignoring you. 2 min Discuss how your values will guide what you do. Prioritise them in order of impact.
- 56. Swap Roles 30s
- 57. Scenario #4 Your teammates keep going out to lunch without inviting you. This is the third time in as many weeks. 2 min Discuss how your values will guide what you do. Prioritise them in order of impact.
- 58. Swap Roles 30s
- 59. Scenario #5 You’re planning your next holiday. 2 min Discuss how your values will guide what you do. Prioritise them in order of impact.
- 60. Swap Roles 30s
- 61. Scenario #6 You’re planning a night out. 2 min Discuss how your values will guide what you do. Prioritise them in order of impact.
- 62. Part Four Compare & Align
- 63. Groups of 4 Form Groups
- 64. Sort your values into two groups: Common Unique Value Value Value Card Value Card Value Value Value Value Value 5 min Value Value Value Value Value
- 65. Discuss: How can your values be used to create high performing teams? Common Unique 5 min
- 66. Self-Regulation People SkillsSelf-Awareness Empathy steve@purkis.ca @spurkis tonypiper.coach @tonypiper Slides Card templates Ideas / Discussion Take these cards! Use them to connect & collaborate… With colleagues With friends & family
- 67. P3X Nov 2018 Audience Feedback
Notas do Editor
- I’ll be your guide on our adventure today
- Put your hand up if you’re missing anything.
- To give some context on values, let me tell you a quick story.
- 20 years ago… I was the guy who posted this up in meeting rooms A bit skeptical, you might say
- 15 years ago, I tried to introduce Agile + XP ideas to Multimap and hit a brick wall The ideas took, but only after 4 years, and I wasn’t around anymore It did prompt me to start searching for answers.
- I read Kotter, which helped me introduce Agile + XP ideas to NAP successfully. We created 2 new businesses And a DevOps team! :) Things were going well - money, family, house, etc.
- But I was still missing something. Kotter was not enough. I didn’t consciously understand what was important to me. Even worse, I walked all over what was important to others
- People get upset. When you don’t understand, you’re not equipped to deal with others properly. It’s only a matter of time.
- 2 years ago, I met my coach, Tony Piper.
- 1 year ago, we did our first Strengths and Values sessions It helped fill in gaps I hadn’t realised were missing. Sure, I’d thought about this kind of stuff before. Doing it with someone else made it more real. Communicating it. Feeling understood. Adjusting until it felt right.
- So, they are deeply connected to your emotions. You can’t separate them.
- Values = anchors. Buoys = behaviours. The line that connects them = attitudes Really important As the winds change and tide shifts, the buoy moves around But there’s a limited range If the line breaks: Your behaviours can drift unguided Leaving you feeling lost. Or doing things that conflict with your values There are situations when your values conflict with one another And you have to choose between the two Desired behaviours, others impose You can adopt, but may not be your preferred behaviours Boss: Be on time for meetings Child: Let me watch something!
- Boils down to EI. Understanding your values, attitudes, and behaviours Enables you to live by them, and deal with internal conflict better. Less grumpy cat Understanding other’s values, attitudes, and behaviours Means less angry cats You can behave in accordance with your values ------------------------------- Self Awareness. How many of you have had negative thoughts before? Did you know that simply labelling them can help you overcome them? Being aware of your emotional state is where it all starts. Understanding your values can give you the words to do that. Self Regulation Once you’re aware of how Empathy Understand the feelings of others People Skills Better equipped to people Skills
- People I know have changed jobs after realising their values are in direct conflict with their role or their company’s values. Sitting next to your boss? ;-) Sharing, may feel uncomfortable YOU are in control. Choose what to share, and what to keep private. Feel free to stop, and simply observe at any time. There’s potential for conflict That’s why we have 3 rules
- If you don’t finish creating your groups, DON’T WORRY.
- It’s ok if you don’t notice patterns.
- We’re going to split into pairs.
- What’s with the chinese symbol?
- At least 3 cards
- Try not to touch your partner’s cards, without permission. Use a piece of paper to cover the card.
- Swap partners?
- Timebox: 5 min
- I challenge you to Notice.
- There are biological reasons for all of this. The Limbic System is often thought of as the emotion centre. It operates much more quickly than our higher-level cognitive functions. 80ms vs ~600ms Mention Robert Sapolsky? If you want to learn some mind boggling things about evolutionary biology, epigenetics, and how it governs our behaviour, check this guy out.
- It’s a spectrum, not black & white. You’ll find there’s a natural order for you. Everybody’s is different. If you find you lack an emotional response to one of your values, consider whether or not it is extrinsically or intrinsically motivated.
- For example: I value money but only because it is instrumental in fulfilling my core values It’s more complex than that, as what you value can change in different situations. It’s all about how you apply them
- Conflict with work
- Swap partners?
- Conflict with work
- Swap partners?
- Excluded
- Swap partners?
- Excluded
- Swap partners?
- Swap partners?
- To consider this, you may want to use scenarios. Competing demands on your team Making day-to-day work fun and enjoyable Creating safety, for your teams and clients
- The cards are yours to take, if you wish You can use these techniques in your teams at work I hope you’ve learned something you can take away with you today! Q&A