Harness Power of Conflict to Improve Your Organization, Your Team, and Yourself! - Agile Games

Shahin Sheidaei | @sheidaei | sheidaei.com | © Elevate Change Inc.
Harness Power of Conflict to Improve
Your Organization, Your Team, and
Yourself!
Shahin Sheidaei

Nice to meet you!
Trouble Maker & Problem Solver!
Shahin Sheidaei
Founder & Principal Coach
Elevate Change Inc.

A colorful Exercise
● Groups of 5 or so
○ Suggestion: in a circular
shape, so all can see and hear
each other
● Pick a color that represents
conflict
● Go around the table and talk
about why you picked the color

A team colorful Exercise
● Mark the colors you picked for
conflict on the “Our Team
Color”
● Go around the table and talk
about how or what this can help
you within a team?
● Can you do that at an
organization level?

Let’s pause
Please pre-navigate to
poll.llc
and wait

conflict?
Please navigate to
poll.llc
and input your answer

DICTIONARY Defines ...
FIGHT, BATTLE, WAR
A state of disharmony between incompatible or antithetical
persons, ideas, or interests; a clash

COnflict health spectrum
A state of disharmony between persons, ideas, or interests
Destructive Constructive
InterestsPersons Ideas

COnflict health spectrum
InterestsPersons Ideas

How do you know In which you (THEY) are?
Persons Situations
Body
Language
← in transition →
Talking about
the situation
v.s. people

How do you know In which you (THEY) are?
Destructive
Constructive
Persons Situations

There can be more!
Destructive
Constructive
Persons Situations

LET’S ARGUE

LEt’s argue
Find another person to pair
up with
● A manager
● A worker

Let’s pause

The 5ive Conflict Handling ModeASSERTIVENESS
COOPERATIVENESS
AVOIDING ACCOMMODATING
COMPETING COLLABORATING
COMPROMISING
UNCOOPERATIVE COOPERATIVE
UNASSERTIVEASSERTIVE
Thomas-Kliman

LET’S ARGUE again

PAUSE REWIND

LEt’s argue
Find another person to pair
up with
● A tester
● A developer
● A team lead

When to use? & 0ver-uses

COLLABORATION USES
● Find an integrative solution for both parties
● Too important to compromise
○ E.g. your values
● To test your assumptions and learn
● Understand others' views
● Merge insights from different perspectives
● To gain commitment by incorporating others’ concerns into
a consensual decision

COLLABORATION OVER-USE
● Do you sometimes spend time discussing issues in depth
that don’t seem to worth it?
○ Collaboration takes lots of time and energy
○ Trivial problems don’t require optimal solutions, and not all
personal differences need to be hashed out.

COMPETING USES
● When quick, decisive action is vital
○ E.g. in an emergency
● Unpopular courses of action need implementing
○ E.g. cost cutting, enforcing unpopular rules, discipline
● Protect yourself
○ E.g from people who take advantage of non competitive behavior

COMPETING OVER-USES
● Are you surrounded by “yes” people?
○ If so, perhaps it’s because they have learned that it’s unwise to
disagree with you or have given up trying to influence you.
○ This closes you off from information.

Accommodating USES
● Realizing that you are wrong
● To allow a better solution to be considered
● To show that you are reasonable
● The issue is much more important to the other person
● You are outmatched
○ E.g. more competition would only damage your cause
● Preserving harmony and avoiding disruption are especially
important
● Allowing your team members to learn from their mistakes

Accommodating 0VER-USES
● Do you feel that your ideas and concerns sometimes don’t
get the attention they deserve?
○ Deferring too much to the concerns of others can deprive you of
influence, respect, and recognition.
○ It can also deprive the organization of your potential contributions.

Avoiding USES
● It is unimportant
● More important issues are present
● No chance of satisfying your concerns
● ROI costs of confronting a conflict outweigh the benefits
of its resolution
● Time to let people cool down
● Gathering more information outweighs advantages of an
immediate decision
● When others can resolve the issue more effectively

Avoiding 0VER-USES
● Causing coordination to suffer
○ because people have trouble getting your input on issues.

Compromising USES
● Goals are moderately important
● Equal power and both committed to mutually exclusive
goals
● Achieve a temporary settlement for a complex issue
● Arrive at an expedient solution under time pressure
● As a backup mode when collaboration or competition fails

Compromising 0VER-USES
● Lost track of values, vision or long-term objectives?
○ Concentrating so heavily on the practicalities and tactics of
compromise that one loses sight of larger Issues.
○ Neglected issues may include principles, values, long-term
objectives, or organization welfare.

LEt’s argue
Find two other person
● A tester
● A developer
● A team lead

WHAT’S next FOR ME?
● SELF-AWARENESS
○ WHAT IS YOUR PERSONAL GO TO
MODE? (@HOME / @WORK)
● EDUCATION
○ WHERE AND WHEN TO USE WHICH?
● REFLECTION
○ WHAT MODE I WAS IN? WHICH
SHOULD HAVE I BEEN IN?

thanks

Harness Power of Conflict to Improve Your Organization, Your Team, and Yourself! - Agile Games

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Harness Power of Conflict to Improve Your Organization, Your Team, and Yourself! - Agile Games

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