1. Dr. Cheryl Novins
RDG 101 OLA

2.  Deconstructing a text focuses on critically
reading the text and asking yourself if you are
going to ACCEPT the information presented
or if you need to QUESTION the information
presented.
 As we look at Colleen’s story – piece by piece
– follow my thought process through the
deconstruction.
 (You will be asked to deconstruct a text at the
end of this module.)

3.  We have already looked at the first paragraph of
Colleen earlier in this module.
I was 18 and dating a man my parents strongly
disapproved of. So they “made a deal” with me:
they would send me to college if I would break
up with him. I agreed, though I never really
meant to keep my end of the bargain.
 If you need, review that information prior to
continuing with the PowerPoint.

4. “I realized I was pregnant when the smells from chemistry class
kept making me sick. A friend convinced me to go her doctor in
town. He diagnosed pregnancy immediately, saying, “Such a
shame, another young one.” He told me not to worry, that “it”
could be “taken care of.” He never once said anything about
keeping the baby, but gave me a card from the local abortuary.”
 Deconstruction: The doctor seems to be too negative. I can’t
imagine a doctor would actually verbalize those thoughts. At first I
thought maybe he knew Colleen her whole life because he seemed
a bit personal about his comments, but then I noticed it was her
friend’s doctor and not her own doctor. I’m sure she didn’t go to
her own doctor because she was hiding her pregnancy from her
parents. I wonder if she is making the doctor seem more callous
than he really was at the time. Colleen is making the doctor into a
“bad person” when he was the medical specialist in this situation.

5. “Although I had no strong religious convictions, the visit to the
clinic for my initial “consultation” left me feeling bad. The nurse
told me to come back in a week with the money to have it done.
 Deconstruction: I’m not exactly sure why she mentioned religion.
There are many people who are not religious and think abortions
are not the way to go. I wonder what Colleen means by “feeling
bad.” Was she sad that she got into this mess? Was she upset that
she had to face this alone? Also, she puts the nurse in a bad light.
Doesn’t she know it’s a business and it’s the nurses business to
inform her about the money needed for the procedure? I’m not
sure what Colleen expected from the nurse. At this point, it seems
like Colleen is quite immature and is looking for others to be
sympathetic toward her situation when she is the one who is
disappointed in herself.

6. “I had heard some things about abortion, and I knew it was
probably wrong. So that whole week, I talked with friends and
teachers, looking for advice. One female teacher in particular
advised me to have it done. She told me that she had had several
abortions, that it was “nothing,” and that I didn’t need this trouble
in my life right now.
 Deconstruction: Colleen says it was “probably wrong” but I’m I
think she is just trying to be non committal to it. She is acting like
she doesn’t have a brain. The conversation with the teach just
sounds wrong to me. I don’t understand how a teacher could share
such personal information with Colleen. I also can’t imagine that
the teacher told her that having an abortion wasn’t a big deal. I
know that in high schools there are guidance counselors and social
workers who work with students who find themselves pregnant. I
wonder if Colleen is actually telling the truth here.

7. “No one, at any time, told me anything about adoption or keeping
the child. In fact, one of my teachers was a nun – and I approached
her, too, with my problem. I think now that I really wanted
someone to say “No! Don’t do it!” But even the nun told me that
abortion was the best route for me.”
 Deconstruction: I really think that the nun’s comments are taken
out of context here. I know that nuns are not supposed to be pro-
choice. I also don’t see any circumstance in which a nun would say
an abortion would be the right course of action. A nun’s first
allegiance is to the church and they are supposed to hold everyone
up to the values of the church. I wonder if Colleen put the
information about the nun in her narrative because she wanted to
stress the point that there was no one who challenged the idea of
abortion. It seems like Colleen is looking for a scapegoat.

8. “My boyfriend didn’t have the money, so my parents volunteered to pay
for it. When I broke down in front of them, saying that I thought it was
wrong to do this, they told me they would kick me out of the house if I
didn’t have the abortion. My father said he wouldn’t have any “little
brown babies in his house!” (My boyfriend was Italian-Puerto-Rican.)
They told me that if I had the baby, I would be completely on my own. I
felt like there was absolutely no way I could escape the inevitable.”
 Deconstruction: It seems like Colleen keeps talking about ultimatums her
parents give her. I can’t imagine that her parents are this heartless and
uncaring, but I think it’s horrible that her father is such a racist. It is sad
that he was unable to accept this child. Maybe the reason the father
didn’t like the boyfriend from the beginning is because he was Italian-
Puerto-Rican. It’s horrible how some people in our society make
decisions about others without getting to know them. Too many people
have preconceived notions about others before meeting them in person
or learning about them and their lives.

9. `“When the time came, my boyfriend and some friends from school went
with me. There were no protesters, no pro-life people. In fact, during the
whole time of this crisis, I never heard a word about or from the pro-life
side. I was led to a room with a whole group of girls, just like me, waiting
to have their babies killed. No one talked. No one looked at anyone else.
They called our names, one by one.”
 Deconstruction: It seems that Colleen was sad that she didn’t have to
cross a picket line and wasn’t accosted when walking into the clinic. That
is exactly opposite of how most people would feel. I think Colleen tried
to show the severity of her actions by using phrases like “babies killed”
and “no one talked” and “called our names, one by one.” It almost seems
like she is being called into a torture chamber. I think she is being a bit
overdramatic at this point. She wants others to cry for her and she is
looking for a hug. It’s like she doesn’t want to face that she is an adult
and has to deal with the consequences of her actions – whether it’s
having a baby at a young age or having an abortion.

10. “I was very scared, mostly of the pain they said I might feel. With the
counselor, I mostly cried. But she just agreed with everyone I had talked
to. Yes, this is a bad time to have a child. Yes, you’re too young. Yes,
having a child costs a lot of money. Yes, it would be so hard for you to
raise a child on your own. Yes, this is the best thing to do.”
 Deconstruction: Colleen seems to feel so sorry for herself at this point in
the narrative. She seems to just keep coming up with more reasons why
she felt pressured to have the abortion. I am a bit perplexed though
because before she was in this predicament, she seemed to have a mind
of her own – always defying her parents and doing what she wanted.
When she became pregnant however, she seemed to have lost the ability
to think and just became a puppet and listened to what others told her. I
just don’t buy it. I think she is looking to blame everyone except herself
for her decision. She made a decision and now feels that she can’t take
responsibility for making it.

11. “Waiting to have my name called, I tried to convince myself of
these things. I just wanted the whole thing to be over with. Finally
they called me in and put me on a table. The dilation was
extremely painful. A counselor held my hand and told me not to
cry, it would be over soon.”
 Deconstruction: At this point Colleen resorts to being a child and
needing her hand held. I think she wants her readers to feel that
she was very innocent. It seems like Colleen pushed her mother
away and tried to act like an adult, but actually may have needed
her mother at this time but was not mature enough to ask her
mother to be a part of this process. It is hard to be independent
and try to be an adult, but I think that part of that process is
knowing when to ask for help and when to deal with situations by
yourself.

12. “The suction machine was very loud – a horrible noise. They had a
picture on the ceiling for you to look at so you wouldn’t have to
think about what was happening to you. The image of that picture
is burned into my memory. They took my baby from me while I
looked at people walking in the rain.”
 Deconstruction: At this point, I think it’s interesting that Colleen
uses the pronoun “you” and not “me” – all of a sudden she stops
making it personal. The point that she remembers the picture –
not the feelings she had at that point, not the boyfriend that let
her down, not the decisions she made against her parents’ wishes
– is a bit strange. She turns something (the abortion) so complex
into something simple (they took the baby away from me). I also
think this may be one of the first times that she refers to it as a
baby and not an it. Once it was out of her body it was a baby, but
when it was in her it was an it.

13. “My boyfriend got drunk while I was in the clinic. He could hardly drive me home.
He was late picking me up and I stood on the corner in front of the clinic, bleeding
and embarrassed until he came. When we got back to my dorm room, I was
crying. I told everyone how awful it was, and how I wished I hadn’t done it after
all. My boyfriend laughed at me – laughed at me! – and said, “Well, that’s what
you get for screwing around!” One of the guys from school tried to throw him
out, and they got into a fight. It was a horrible scene. I’m sure he got drunk to try
and deal with it; he knew, deep down, that it was wrong. He was only trying to
blame me for it so the responsibility for it wouldn’t weigh on his shoulders.”
 Deconstruction: Why did Colleen get into the car with her drunken boyfriend?
Are we supposed to feel bad for her and realize that she no longer treasured her
life? I think her word choice “bleeding and embarrassed” shows that she wanted
to be invisible but just a few paragraphs ago she complained because she was
invisible and no one was in her face about the abortion. She just can’t make up
her mind! At this point she really paints a bad picture of her boyfriend. If he is so
horrible, then why did she marry him later? Is Colleen saying that her boyfriend
was trying to blame her for the abortion while at the same time she was blaming
him?

14. “In the end, the abortion did not “solve all my problems” as
everyone had promised. My parents still kicked me out. I had to
quit school. I married the boyfriend. It didn’t work out. He became
an alcoholic and a drug addict. He beat me up and brought other
women into our bed.”
 Deconstruction: Colleen is always portraying herself as the victim.
It’s really getting a bit out of control. Everything seems to happen
to her. She tried to word everything to show she is not in control
of anything. I wonder why her parents really threw her out. Also,
why did she marry her boyfriend? That was a ridiculous decision on
her part. He was a mess before they got married. Why did she
think he would change? She seems a bit dramatic – he was an
alcoholic and drug addict, he beat her up, and cheated on her. I
am sure there is more to the story than all of this and I wonder why
Colleen doesn’t share it with her reader.

15. “One night during a drunken spree, he held a knife to my chest. I
told him to kill me, that I wanted to die. I had nothing. No parents,
no husband, really, no baby, and no self-respect. How could he
respect me? I had killed our child. How could I look at myself in the
mirror every day? I was a murderer. I truly wanted to die. Soon
after this, we were separated and divorced.”
 Deconstruction: Colleen really sounds desperate here. It seems
she wants us to believe that that one decision to have the abortion
led to having a knife held to her chest. Did Colleen really believe
she was worthless or is she just trying to get sympathy from her
reader? I think it’s ridiculous that she says that “soon after this”
they weren’t apart. If someone held a knife to my chest, I would be
out of there that minute and would press charges. Why does she
try to portray herself as not having any control of anything in her
life?

16. “My abortion was about ten years ago. To me, it’s like a bad, bad
nightmare, deep in the past, best forgotten. I still haven’t told anyone in
my present life (my husband, my church friends, anyone I respect) about
the abortion. I can’t. I know that they would see me differently, and I
couldn’t stand that.”
 Deconstruction: Colleen notes that she wants to forget that part of her
life, but it seems like she blames it for everything. She has to do one or
the other. Also, I don’t get why she hasn’t told anyone. Is she ashamed
of what she did? The whole time she told us that others forced her into
the decision. Does she think that others won’t believe that? Does she
think they will think less of her? It seems like she doesn’t tell the truth
because she knows she is partly at fault for what happened to her in her
life. Also, I think that she is not giving those in her life today any credit. If
they love her then they will accept everything about her. Having an
abortion is not a crime. Why does she write her story like it is?

17. “I’ve had one child since then, and I’m pregnant again. These
children are my joy — and my forgiveness from God. My little boy
is so, so precious and wonderful. If I had only known how sweet
and wonderful a baby is, I never would have done it – not in 2
million years.”
 Deconstruction: I’m glad Colleen is happy with her children but the
whole “forgiveness from God” is a bit too much. Does she really
think that the God she believes in would need to forgive her? I
also think she is a bit delusional here. She says that she didn’t
know that babies were “sweet” and “wonderful.” Did she live
under a rock? She had never seen a baby or heard anyone gush
over a newborn? I think this paragraph is a bit bizarre. Colleen
seems to say she needs forgiveness for something that was
beyond her control, or does she actually know it was within her
control but cannot bring herself to say it.

18. “I now picket the clinics in the area, and I write letters to the paper and
give money to pro-life groups. This helps a little — I feel that I need to do
at least this much. It’s obvious that the abortion wrecked my life.
Emotionally, I was a different person before and after it. It left a path of
destruction in my life. My family, my first marriage, my image of myself –
all a total wreck. Nothing will ever be the same.”
 Deconstruction: I don’t understand how the abortion “wrecked her life” –
she is happily married, has one child, and another one on the way. Is her
life hell now? I don’t think so. I agree that she had some tough times in
her life, but I don’t think that the abortion “left a path of destruction.” I
think that Colleen made some poor choices like marrying her boyfriend
and disobeying her parents. I don’t understand what she means by
“Nothing will ever be the same.” What does she want the same? She was
eighteen back then and now she is twenty-eight. Of course life is
different now.

19. “I know now the lies I was told, the truths that were withheld from me,
the facts that were glossed over or left out. As a pregnant woman, I go to
my doctor’s office and see pictures of babies in tummies. Month by
month, I hear my baby’s heartbeat. I’m told how to do everything that’s
best for my baby’s health. Why is it legal across town to NOT tell these
things?”
 Deconstruction: Doesn’t Colleen remember that she sought out her
friend’s doctor and didn’t go to her own doctor or ask her mother for
help? Colleen tried to hide her pregnancy back then. She didn’t welcome
the pregnancy. Of course now that she is older and married she
welcomes having a child and she treats the experience differently.
Doesn’t she see that? The word “legal” is also an issue. Is she talking
about her experience at the clinic? Didn’t she go there to get an
abortion? Why would they let her hear her baby’s heartbeat is she was
going to terminate the pregnancy? I feel like Colleen is still not able to
make peace with her decision and wants to point a finger at someone
other than herself.

20. “I am just glad that I’m able to tell others. I’m glad that I can be outside
that clinic when no one was there for me. I may not be able to confess my
abortion, but I can fight abortion!”
 Deconstruction: Wait a minute! Colleen can tell her story to people she
doesn’t know by writing it down but she can’t tell those who are
supposed to love her? There is something wrong with that. I think that
the idea that she is happy to be outside clinics and picket when others go
in to have abortions is a bit extreme. How about educating young girls
regarding safe sex and not making them feel horrible about themselves
when they go to the clinic? She wants to fight abortions but she can’t
even take responsibility for having one. I think Colleen still doesn’t see
the truth. I feel that she is trying to blame everyone except herself for the
mess she got herself into when she was younger. Colleen is looking for a
scapegoat. She has not taken responsibility for her actions. She is a
shallow woman who feels that her life was ruined because others didn’t
come to help her in her time of need. She forgets that she was a strong-
willed young woman who tried to trick her parents and made promised
that she never meant to keep.

21.  In this PowerPoint I separated the text and
my deconstruction of each section so you
could read my thought process throughout
the narrative.
 When you write your deconstruction/analysis,
you will need to synthesize quotes from the
initial text into your assignment and not
separate the text from your ideas.

22.  If you have any questions regarding the
information on the previous slide – how my
deconstruction is organized differently than
yours will be in your assignment, please email
me. I am really good at responding to
questions quickly! 