1) While the concept of zombies created by God or supernatural means is unlikely, a zombie apocalypse caused by a biological agent such as a virus is more plausible according to the document.
2) A dormant or mutated virus could potentially spread quickly through the population like the flu and turn people into zombies.
3) An outbreak of infected living people displaying zombie-like behaviors (called "pseudo-zombies") may be even more likely than an uprising of reanimated corpses.
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Zombie apocalypse
1.
2.
3. As cruel as God’s wrath has been purported to be by ancient scribes and
scholars, I would highly doubt that zombies would be unleashed by our
creator. This is mainly for two reasons:
1) The concept of zombies now differs greatly with concepts of the
undead in antiquity—in other words, John the Revelator and
Zechariah were talking about something completely different than
George Romero.
2) If the end were nigh, I think God would do something much flashier,
because he’s such a flamboyant bitch about destroying civilizations.
You never know, zombies could be some kind of divination to punish us,
but I suspect this would be the least likely source of the newly undead.
4.
5.
6. • As I’ve stated in the previous Z-Week entry, we already know of cases of
“zombies” under the control of a priest or priestess schooled in the ways
of Vodun. A toxic mix of chemicals is used to induce a permanent
trance-like state. The zombie still retains basic motor functions but is a
mental vegetable. This sounds a bit more ominous given that these dark
arts are still practiced in circles all over the world. As you’ll see in
tomorrow’s entry, one of the most notorious criminals in American
history tried to create a small group of personal zombies.
• While the practical application of alchemy and witchcraft to create the
“undead” is there, the possibility for a worldwide Zombie Apocalypse is
about as likely as God smiting us with mindless cannibals.
• How would one person, or even a group of people, introduce chemicals
into the population on the scale of entire cities, let alone states and
countries? While I love the idea of Papa Shango dancing around a
wrestling ring with hordes of mindless slaves, it doesn’t seem possible.
7.
8. • I think the germs stand the best chance at delivering us a Zombie
Apocalypse. In fact, most of Hollywood seems to think that a long
dormant virus, biological weapons or mutated bacteria will spread
through humanity like wildfire and make us ravenously hungry for
each other’s brains. This is certainly possible, especially if the disease
hops a ride with something like the common cold or flu. If it
managed to either disguise itself as something more benign or hid
with another routine medical malady, virtually overnight entire
countries would be swarming with zombies and those carrying the
zombie virus.
• Video games, movies, TV shows and books have all touched on the
consequences of this more eloquently than I can—except the
Resident Evil movies, fuck them, they suck shit—but I think the
biological route is the most plausible.
9.
10. • All it takes is one weapon test that gets out of control; some kind of
calamity in the lab where they do viral research at the CDC; one lost
tourist sustaining a bite from an exotic animal species…you get the
idea.
• It also allows for something I call “pseudo-zombies.”
• Pseudo-zombies, PZsfrom here on out, are those that aren’t dead but
display the mindless and cannibalistic tendencies of their truly dead
brethren. Movies like 28 Days Later, The Crazies and Slither are
chock-full of PZsand they were all altered by biological means.
11. • This sounds relatively stupid but—no this sounds extremely
stupid, but you have been following a slide show about
zombies, so who’s the real idiot? Anyway, this sounds stupid
but I think a PZ outbreak is far more likely to wreak havoc on us
than a cluster of reanimated corpses.
• When the shit hits the fan, you better hope the PZsaren’t like
the ones in 28 Days Later, and if they are, I hope you’ve been
following Rule #1.
