1. Emotional Intelligence
What is it?
Why is it Important?
Facilitator: Linda Batty
November 5, 2013
OSU/Tulsa

2. PLEASE SET YOUR CELL PHONE
ON VIBRATE AND
LEAVE CLASS IF YOU
MUST TAKE OR MAKE A CALL.

3. Emotional Intelligence in the
Workplace
Purpose:
To acquaint you with the principles of
emotional intelligence and the
management application in state
government.

4. 1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Objectives
Define and describe EI and the relevant
skills and competencies.
Evaluate your EI and identify strength
and improvement areas.
Identify the role of EI in the workplace.
Describe how you think others might see
your actions.
Identify tips that will enhance your EI.
Apply EI principles in exercises and
scenarios.

5. Domains of Competence
What strikes you as the characteristic that
stands out or is most noticeable for that
“exceptional person”?
– How smart they are, e.g. IQ
– How skilled they are in doing their job
– How they handle themselves and others in a
crisis or emotionally charged situation, e.g. EQ

6. What is I.Q.?
• Intelligence Quotient
• Mental Age
• Chronological Age = I.Q.

7. IQ versus EQ
1. When we are looking for a new hire,
which one do we emphasize: IQ, Job
skills, EQ?
2. Which do you think is most important
in the workplace?

8. If you said Emotional
Intelligence…
you are in agreement with the majority.
A growing body of research suggests that
emotional intelligence plays a far more important
role in job performance and career success than
general intelligence and job skills, in fact-- twice as
important in technical/professional positions and
four times more important in leadership positions.

9. My First Interest in E.I.
Published in 1995

10. Emotional Intelligence
Daniel Goleman Notes
•
•
•
•
•
Self-awareness
Self-management
Self-motivation
Empathy
Social Skills

11. Understand Your Brain
• 1) Instinct
• 2) Emotions
• 3) Logic

12. How to Handle an Amygdala
Highjack
•
•
•
•
•
•
Watch Yourself
Find a Model
Notice Signals
Short Circuit the Highjack
Repeat Steps
Forgive Yourself

13. Why people are most often encouraged to
“pursue new opportunities”…
• Couldn’t get along with…
• Wasn’t a team player…
• Didn’t fit in…
Emotional Intelligence..!

14. Emotional Intelligence Definition
Emotional intelligence (EI) is your ability to
recognize and understand emotions and
your
skill at using this awareness to manage
yourself and relationships with others.
EI may be a quality of an executive control
system for emotional regulation supported
by sites in the brain’s frontal cortex.
Emotional Quotient (EQ) captures the side of life that the
Intelligence Quotient (IQ) does not.

15. Three Components of
Emotion:
1. Cognitive Component –
[our paradigms]
The thoughts, beliefs and expectations
housed in our rational brain that
contribute to our emotions.

16. 2. Physiological Component (feelings)Within the limbic system, neurons transmit
messages from the brain through an electrical
and chemical system. Substances called
peptides, which are the chemical components of
emotions, are carried to every cell of our body
and are responsible for triggering the physical
sensation of emotional responses such as a
racing heart, sweaty palms, etc.
Our “feelings” don’t lie; they help us understand
our emotions.

17. 3. Behavioral Component
How emotions are expressed, for example
a smile when we feel happy. Nonverbal
behaviors are the most common
expression of emotions, even when we
are trying to hide how we feel.

18. Recent research using
brain scans shows…
The brain’s wiring emphatically relies
on emotion over intellect in decisionmaking.

19. Our emotional brain is just as
important in reasoning as is our rational
brain…
• In a sense, we have two brains and two different
kinds of intelligence. Emotional intelligence
matters just as much as IQ. How we do in life is
determined by both.
• When these partners interact well, emotional
intelligence rises, as does intellectual ability.

20. Emotional Intelligence is a
partnership!
• Our rational brain can help our emotional
brain differentiate real threats from false
alarms.
• Our emotions help our rational brain focus
on our values and intentions—not just facts.
• Purposeful reflection can eventually help us
rewire our limbic system so that our
emotional reactions (feelings and behaviors)
are in line with our intentions. We want to be
able to redirect a hijacking before it takes
over and causes us to react in ways that are
not healthy or effective.

21. EI Skill Areas,
What I See
[Perception]
What I Do
[Behavior]
Personal
Competence
Self-Awareness
SelfManagement
Social
Competence
Social Awareness
Relationship
Management

22. Moving from Dependence to
Interdependence
Habits 4-6
Interdependence
Independence
Habit 7
Dependence
Habits 1-3

23. Seven Habits
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Be proactive
Begin with the end in mind
Put first things first
Think win-win
Seek first to understand, then to be
understood
6. Synergize
7. Sharpen the saw

24. Endowments:
Stimulus
Self-awareness
Conscience
Imagination
Independent
will
Response

25. Proactive or Reactive?
Proactive Response: Respons(ibility)
Freedom: Can choose response
Condition of the person
Reactive Response: Victim mentality; external
locus of control
Liberty: Condition of the environment

26. Whose Job Is It?
This is a story about four people named Everybody,
Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an
important job to be done and Everybody was
asked to do it. Anybody could have done it, but
Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that,
because it was Everybody’s job. Everybody
thought Anybody could do it but Nobody realized
that Everybody wouldn’t do it. It ended up that
Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did
what Anybody could have done.

27. Emotional Hijacking
•
When we perceive a danger or threat, whether or not it is
real, the amygdala scans our experience comparing what
is happening now with what happened in the past.
•
It responds 80-100 times faster than the rational brain.
We feel before we think and react without being
immediately aware of why.
•
Our perception of the current event may be distorted and
it may be only vaguely similar to a past event, but the
amygdala can trigger the same emotional reaction because
it’s not very picky!

28. When we are emotionally
“hijacked”
• The amygdala sends stress
hormones to the body that
take 3-4 hours to clear out.
• We act in ways we don’t
understand or like because
of established patterns of
behavior from these
previous similar emotional
situations. This can lead to
disastrous consequences
for our current
relationships.

29. Emotionally Unintelligent/Intelligent Beliefs
Unintelligent
•Need to have everyone’s
approval
•Am responsible for other’s
feelings and solving their
problems
•Have to win to feel good
Intelligent
•Impossible to please everyone
all the time
•Can try to influence others;
have no control over their
feelings
•Can feel good for trying; not
possible to avoid all mistakes
•People & conditions in my life •I can’t always control what
are the source of my problems happens to me, but I can choose
how I respond to life’s
circumstances

30. Emotionally Intelligent Workplaces
• Self-Awareness = Culture [Mission, Vision,
Values, Strategic Plan]
• Self-Management = Climate [Flexibility, Control,
Policies, Procedures, Walking the talk: values,
standards, ethics]
• Social Awareness = [Morale, Diversity,
Recognition of and response to needs]
• Relationship Management [Feedback, Group
synergy, Response to change and conflict,
Collaboration, Influencing goal attainment]

31. When you find yourself experiencing an
emotional hijack:
• Pause. This helps you put on the brakes of your
amygdala, shift gears and regroup. Otherwise, your
emotional brain rushes ahead, controlling the situation
without any help from your rational brain.
• Breathe slowly and deeply. When your head is clear,
you are able to think more rationally.
• Listen patiently. Let others finish speaking, even if it
takes a while. This calms them and gives you time to
think.
• Step outside your body and picture the current
situation as if you were watching a movie. What
would you recommend the main character do?

32. When you find yourself experiencing an
emotional hijack (cont.):
•
•
•
•
•
Have a mantra to recite to yourself like “In the big scheme of
things, does this really matter?” or “Is this the hill I am willing to
die on?”
Take a time-out if you find yourself losing control. Get away from
the situation, if possible.
Move. If you can’t get away, move in some way, like taking a sip of
a drink or shifting in your chair.
Congratulate yourself after successfully avoiding a hijacking.
Reflect on how you did it to anchor it for next time.
If you didn’t avoid the hijacking, avoid rationalizing your reaction.
Instead, reflect on what was the probable emotional trigger, what
you were feeling and thinking, and how you might avoid the trigger
and or the hijacking next time.

33. When you find yourself resisting a
change…
• Admit to yourself that you can’t change
the reality but you can change how you
react to it.
• Talk through your concerns with
someone who is not as invested in the
situation to help you gain perspective.
• Make a list of the potential positive
outcomes to balance your natural
tendency to focus on the negative.

34. Effective Listening
Constructive Feedback
• Listening with the attitude to learn
requires feedback.
• Feedback with the desire to be
constructive requires listening.

35. Emotional Intelligence Interview Questions
Emotional Self-Awareness: Tell me about a time when your
awareness of your own emotions caused you to change your plan
of action.
Assertiveness: Tell me about a time when you spoke up knowing
that by doing so you were taking a risk.
Self-Regard: Please tell us what we can expect as a “Return” on
our investment (your salary) in you.
Independence: Tell us about a time when you took a critical action
in the workplace without being directed to do so.
Self-Actualization: Tell us about a time when you felt most
fulfilled. What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment? What
are you proud of?

36. Empathy: You notice a co-worker choking back tears throughout a
meeting. Nobody else seems to notice because of the way he/she is
sitting. The meeting ends. You both get up to leave. What do you
do?
Social Responsibility: Tell us your thoughts on how you think you
can “give back to others/make the world a better place/help others/
be of service” by simply carrying out the duties required by this
job.
Interpersonal Relationship: What are your thoughts about
developing friendships with your coworkers?
Problem Solving: Describe a problem you discovered in a
previous job and what you did about it. Describe a problem that
you solved where you are particularly proud of the solution you
came up with. How did you go about solving it?
Flexibility: Describe a situation where you had to be extremely
flexible.

37. Reality Testing: Are you more of a dreamer or more of a realist?
Give me an example of how someone observing might know this
about you.
Stress Tolerance: Tell me how you deal with stress. What do you
do to proactively deal with stress. Tell me about a time when you
had to deal with a lot of stress and how you handled it.
Impulse Control: Tell me about your ability to resist the
temptation to do things you may later regret. Have you ever done
something you later regretted?
Happiness: Tell me about a time in your life when you
experienced a great deal of “life satisfaction.” What makes you
“happy?” Define “happiiness” for me.
Optimism: Describe your general attitude to work and life. What
does “good attitude” mean to you? This glass I’m holding, how
would you describe it – as half-full or half-empty and what’s the
difference – is there a difference – does it matter?

38. 9 Qualities of Truly Confident People
1. They take a stand not because they think they are
always right… but because they are not afraid to be
wrong.
2. They listen ten times more than they speak.
3. They duck the spotlight so it shines on others.
4. They freely ask for help.
5. They think, “Why not me?”
6. They don't put down other people.
7. They aren’t afraid to look silly…
8. And they own their mistakes.
9. They only seek approval from the people who really
matter.

39. Linda Batty’s Email Address
• l.batty@cox.net