Home: The State of Family in America

HOMEThe State of Family in America
®

At the center
of every home is
a homemaker.
What does
it mean to
be a family?
Who’s at the center?
It’s easy to think of a homemaker as a stereotype from an
earlier time. And, to many of us, it seems like a homemaker
can only be part of a certain kind of family.
But these days, a homemaker is anyone who makes a
home. And that doesn’t mean staying at home and tying
on a frilly apron. It means lots of different things. For lots
of different families.

71%
We get nostalgic
about old-fashioned
values.
And we feel like we want to go back to a simpler time, when
everything seemed a little easier. When asked which decade
was the best for children to grow up in, more Americans
chose the 1950s than any other decade.1
71% of Americans say that
they have “old-fashioned
values about family
and marriage.” 2

85%
75%
75%
85% of American adults say
that the family they live in
now is as close or closer than
the family they grew up in.4
75% of Americans do
NOT think that women
should return to their
traditional roles.6
67% of Americans are
optimistic about the future
of marriage and family.5
75% of Americans say that
they are “very satisfied”
with their family life.3
67%
But what we really want
isn’t to be old-fashioned.
It’s to be together.
When we really think about what it means to be an old-fashioned
family, we don’t want to go back to the way things were. We’re
happy with the ways that we live and work together today.

There are more ways to be a
family now than ever before.
And looking at the different ways of being a family makes our
understanding of home deeper and richer.
Here’s what we’ve learned:
There’s a new kind of normal when it comes to the American family.

Marriage is changing.
In 2010, less than half of all households in the
United States included a husband and a wife.
It’s the first time that’s ever happened - since the
census started collecting household data in 1940. 7
46% of marriages in America today are remarriages
for at least one of the people involved. 8
46%REMARRIAGES

Both moms and dads
are spending more
time with their kids.
Married parents spend way more time with their kids
now than they did in 1965. Moms have increased
their time with kids by 21%. And dads? Have more
then tripled theirs. 9
Over 90% of dads who live with their children talk
with their kids about the day and have meals with
them at least a few times a week. 10
MOMS DADS

There are more
stepfamilies, adoptive
families, and couples
living together.
Step relatives are everywhere - 42% of Americans
have at least one. 11
And so is adoption. 100 million Americans have at
least one adopted family member. 12
More than 80% of births outside of marriage
are to a couple that intends to raise their child
together. And almost half of unmarried couples
who have children live together. 13

The number of
same-sex couples is
increasing – fast.
The number of same-sex couples living together
has increased by 80% in the last ten years,
according to U.S. Census Bureau estimates. 14
80%

We’re taking care of
our parents longer.
These days, most people will spend more time
caring for their parents than they will caring for
their children. 15

Our new family structures
make us happy.
Because the love that exists between family members
is a lot more important than how they’re arranged.

We know how important
family is, and we make
time for it.
76% of adults say that family is the most impor-
tant part of their lives. 16
84% of families with kids under 18 have family
meals together at least a few times a week. 17
84%

Couples are sharing
household chores and
paid work more evenly.
Dads are sharing the load - since 1965,
they’ve more than doubled the time they
spend doing chores, from 4 hours a week to
10 hours a week. And moms have decreased
their hours of chores from 32 hours a week to
18 hours a week. 18
26% of women now earn at least 10% more
than their husbands. 19
MOMS
(1965)
MOMS
(2011)
DADS
(1965)
DADS
(2011)

Most of us are happy
about the new ways
couples are sharing work.
Men are happier when they help with
household work. 20
In one survey, 8 out of 10 young adults who
grew up with a working mom said it was the
best choice for their family. 21
62% of people say that “sharing household
chores” is “very important” for a successful mar-
riage, even higher than the number who say the
same about “an adequate income,” only 53%. 22
SOMEWHAT
IMPORTANT
0 25 50 75 100
SHARING HOUSEHOLD CHORES
VERY
IMPORTANT
DON’T
KNOW
NOT AS
IMPORTANT
NOT
IMPORTANT

Every family makes
home in a different way.
And every family has its own unique strengths.

Interracial families:
Most interracial families make a strong commit-
ment to their children, and many spend more
than the average amount of time and money
on their families. 23
Adrian, Tracy, Jasmine, and Jade

Divorced families:
About half of grown children whose parents
were divorced said that their relationships with
their fathers were very strong. Their fathers
spent lots of dedicated time with them and
attended many of their school and recreational
activities. 24
Shari, Frederick, Chase, and Savanna

Singles:
Most singles live happy and healthy lives, and
have firm connections to their communities. They
create strong relationships with their friends and
maintain robust intergenerational ties. 25
Nien and Waffles (dog)

Same-sex couples:
Same-sex couples not only share the load in the
tasks of daily life, but they also tend to approach
one another gently during times of conflict. 26
Many children of same-sex couples are proud
of the way they’ve learned to treat others - with
compassion and respect. 27
Susan, Carol, Jonathan, and Max (dog)

Stay-at-home parents:
In many families where a mom or dad stays
at home, the stay-at-home parent can devote
lots of attention to school and extracurricular
activities, spending extra time on homework,
meeting with teachers, and leisure activities
with the kids. 28
Rochelle, Ahjah, Malachi, and Eliana

Parents who both work:
Children raised in families where both parents
work learn to respect women and women’s roles. 29
62% of Americans say marriages are better when
husbands and wives both have jobs and share
responsibility for the household and kids. 30
Perteet, Frederick, and Clark

Single parent families:
Single parent families tend to have healthy
relationships with extended family, and keep
them involved in their kids’ lives. 31
Single parents spend lots of time talking with
their kids. 32
Krista, Ian, and Evan

Stepfamilies:
Stepfamilies can provide multiple role
models of both genders for children. 33
Successful stepfamilies work as a
team, creating a strong support system
that helps them maintain stability. 34
Amanda Lynn, Michael, and Gabriella

At Betty Crocker, we’re inspired
by the unique strengths of
every kind of family.
We’re learning a lot about the many ways different families
are making home - and we want to share their successes
with the world.

Love is all it takes to make a
home. Love is why homemakers
create somewhere warm, safe,
and supportive for their families.
Talking together brings families
closer, helps them work out tensions
and problems before they get too
serious, and helps them share the
joys and sorrows of everyday life.
Modern homes - and the
families who make them -
have some important
things in common.
1. Love
2. Communication
Vacations, meals together, and
even just playing are important
ways for families to enjoy each
other’s company. Sharing the good
things in life keeps families close.
5. Support Systems
3. Working Together
4. Playing Together
Sharing chores makes families
happier and brings them closer
together. When everyone feels
responsible for making home,
home belongs to everyone.
Sometimes, keeping a family
together requires some outside
help. Whether it’s neighbors,
extended family, or friends,
having a support system can
make all the difference.

Where there’s a family,
there’s a home.
And where there’s
a home, there’s a
homemaker.
Everyone is part of
a home, one way
or another.

Home is what you make it.
And we’re here to help.
®

1. What makes you proud of your family?
2. What is the biggest struggle your family faces?
3. How do you work together to make a home?
Tweet your answers:
#familiesproject
bettycrocker.com/familiesproject
Join the Families Project.
We’re on a mission to understand what it means to be a family,
so we can share the strengths that make every family part of a home.
®

A special thanks to all
of the families that helped.
Krista
Mary
Ian
Evan
Amanda
Michael
Mason
Gabriella
Miles
Rochelle
Ahjah
Malachi
Eliana
Susan
Carol
Patrick
Jonathan
Max (dog)
Frederick
Shari
Chase
Savanna
Perteet
Frederick
Clark
Adrian
Tracy
Jasmine
Jade
Nien
Waffles (dog)

Citations
1. Coontz, Stephanie, The Way We Really Are: Coming to Terms with America’s Changing Families,
(New York: Basic Books, 1997), 33.
2. Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends Project. “The Decline of Marriage and
the Rise of New Families,” Pew Research Center, November 18, 2010, accessed April 15, 2013,
http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2010/11/18/the-decline-of-marriage-and-rise-of-new-families.
3. Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends Project. “The Decline of Marriage and the
Rise of New Families,” Pew Research Center, November 18, 2010, accessed April 15, 2013,
7. “Living arrangements evolve,” Las Vegas Review-Journal, January 13, 2013, accessed April 20, 2013,
http://www.reviewjournal.com/news/living-arrangements-evolve.
8. Osborne, Judy, “Remember Stepmothers on Mother’s Day,” Council on Contemporary Families,
May 10, 2009, accessed April 18, 2013, http://www.contemporaryfamilies.org/children-parent-
ing/stepmothers.html.
9. Coleman, Joshua and Stephanie Coontz, ed., “Unconventional Wisdom, Issue 1: A Survey of
Research and Clinical Findings,” Council on Contemporary Families, May 4, 2001, accessed
April 18, 2013, http://www.contemporaryfamilies.org/all/wisdom1.html.
10. 10 Livingston, Gretchen and Kim Parker, “A Tale of Two Fathers: More Are Active, but More Are
Absent,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends Project, June 15, 2011, ac-
cessed April 18, 2013, http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2011/06/15/a-tale-of-two-fathers.
11. Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends Project. “A Portrait of Stepfamilies,” Pew
Research Center, January 13, 2011, accessed April 15, 2013, http://www.pewsocialtrends.
org/2011/01/13/a-portrait-of-stepfamilies.
12. “Press Advisory: CCF Conference on ‘Families as They Really Are: How Do We Use What We
Know?’” Council on Contemporary Families, January 30, 2010, accessed April 18, 2013,
http://www.contemporaryfamilies.org/conference/2010conference.html.
Research and Clinical Findings,” Council on Contemporary Families, May 4, 2001,
accessed April 18, 2013, http://www.contemporaryfamilies.org/all/wisdom1.html.
14. Lofquist, Daphne et. al., “Households and Families: 2010: 2010 Census Briefs,” U.S. Census Bureau,
April, 2012, accessed April 20, 2013, http://www.census.gov/prod/cen2010/briefs/c2010br-14.
pdf, 5.
17. Cohn, D’Vera. “Family Meals, Cohabitation, and Divorce,” Pew Research Center Social and1
Demographic Trends Project, April 8, 2011, accessed April 18, 2013, http://www.pewsocial-
trends.org/2011/04/08/family-meals-cohabitation-and-divorce.
18. Parker, Kim and Wendy Wang, “Modern Parenthood: Roles of Moms and Dads Converge as They
Balance Work and Family,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends Project,
March 14, 2013, accessed April 18, 2013, http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2013/03/14/modern-
parenthood-roles-of-moms-and-dads-converge-as-they-balance-work-and-family.
Research and Clinical Findings on Gender, Family, and Equality,” Council on Contemporary
Families, April 17, 2009, accessed April 18, 2013, http://contemporaryfamilies.org/all/uncon-
ventionalwisdom2.html.
20. Vachon, Marc and Amy and Sarah Schoppe-Sullivan, “Why Every Day Should Be Father’s AND
Mother’s Day: A Commentary Prepared for the Council on Contemporary Families,” Council
on Contemporary Families, June 19, 2011, accessed April 20, 2013, http://www.contemporary-
families.org/children-parenting/why-every-day-should-be-fathers-and-mothers-day.html.

22. Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends Project. “Modern Marriage,” Pew Research
Center, July 18, 2007, accessed April 15, 2013, http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2007/07/18/
modern-marriage.
Research and Clinical Findings on Gender, Family, and Equality,” Council on Contemporary
Families, April 17, 2009, accessed April 18, 2013, http://contemporaryfamilies.org/all/uncon-
ventionalwisdom2.html.
26. 26 Coleman, Joshua and Stephanie Coontz, ed., “Unconventional Wisdom, Issue 2: A Survey of
Research and Clinical Findings Prepared for the Council on Contemporary Families’ 13th An-
niversary Conference at Augustana College, Rock Island, Illinois,” Council on Contemporary
Families, April 16, 2010, accessed April 18, 2013, http://contemporaryfamilies.org/all/unconven-
tional-wisdom-issue-3.html.
27. Pappas, Stephanie, “Why Gay Parents May Be the Best Parents,” LiveScience, January 15, 2012,
accessed April 25, 2013, http://www.livescience.com/17913-advantages-gay-parents.html.
(New York: Basic Books, 1997), 167 – 168.
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