A modified deck from a workshop I did on interpersonal feedback and coaching skills with the Stanford GSB Entrepreneurial Commitment Group in March 2016.
16. Emotions are
attention magnets
Disclosing feelings can be uncomfortable
But we’re wired to respond to emotion
And vulnerability can create intimacy
Comfort with discomfort
Read
More
17. 5 levels
Photo by Rita Willaert [link]
Richard Francisco, Stanford
In what ways do we communicate?
Increasing levels of difficulty, risk & learning
Read
More
18. 5 levels1: Ritual
2: Extended Ritual
3: Content
4: Feelings About Content
5: Feelings About Each Other
Photo by Rita Willaert [link]
19. 5 levels
5: Feelings About Each Other
Photo by Rita Willaert [link]
Hardest
Riskiest
Most powerful for feedback
20. Can I give you
Photo by Robbie Grubbs [link]
some feedback?
36. Reframe the experience
Offering feedback ≠ Higher status
Emphasize choice & agency
Build the relationship
Manage defensiveness*
When getting
feedback
37. When giving
Avoid a threat response
Be mindful of perceived status
More certainty & autonomy
Build the relationship
Minimize defensiveness*
feedback
52. Modes of inquiry
1. Pure inquiry
Open-ended
Avoid presumptive questions
Adapted from Edgar Schein [link]
53. Modes of inquiry
1. Pure inquiry
2. Diagnostic inquiry
Focus & redirect
Feelings, motives, actions
Adapted from Edgar Schein [link]
54. Modes of inquiry
1. Pure inquiry
2. Diagnostic inquiry
3. Confrontational inquiry
Introduce new ideas & hypotheses
Challenge their narrative
Adapted from Edgar Schein [link]
55. Modes of inquiry
1. Pure inquiry
2. Diagnostic inquiry
3. Confrontational inquiry
We tend to move too quickly
Critical to check our assumptions
Adapted from Edgar Schein [link]