This is a story I wrote for my son Julian.

1. This is the story of
Julian James Durum McConnell
Born March 7, 2012

2. Your life began one night after a Phish concert…

3. When this woman …

4. And
this
man
…

5. Well, you know.

6. And you grew and grew…

7. And we had parties for you even though
you didn’t show up – but everyone
brought you presents…

8. Obviously,
this is
before
Daddy’s
haircut
Really cool presents, too!

9. Scary narrow trail
overlooking steep
drop to frigid river
And Mommy insisted on taking hikes, long,
treacherous hikes, to try and make you come
out (you can ask her about this idea yourself)

10. It must have worked, because one night,
she couldn’t stop dancing…

11. And she felt really bad…

12. Cute Dog
Fat cat
And the animals could tell there was
something wrong, so they followed her
around.

13. It’s called
sympathy
pains, but it
basically
means
Daddy’s
crazy
And Daddy felt Mommy’s pain, too

14. She drank
some booze,
too. But
don’t worry,
you should
be okay (we
hope)
Mommy tried to relieve some of
the pain by taking a bath…

15. Juice
And another bath at the birth center. This bath
was in a big pool in which she moaned in
agony for hours and hours.

16. Notice
But you finally arrived! dome
shape

17. With all this goo on you, too.

18. And we were happy.

19. Daddy needs
to work out
some more,
and he knows.
Daddy got to hold you, skin to skin…

20. And we weighed you (7 Ibs 14 ozs)
and we measured you (21 ¼ inches)

21. But mostly we held you and looked at you.

22. Andrea, the
nurse
Suzanna, the
midwife
And we were happy!

23. And Nana held you…

24. And Cowboy Tex held you…

25. Painfully adorable
outfit
And we brought you home the
very same night.

26. Bundle of Joy
You slept off and on…

27. But Mommy didn’t.
(Daddy might have gotten a few hours.)

28. THE END
(Of the beginning)

29. (I just had to include this picture)