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Ange Albertini
Beyond your studiesYou studied X at Y. now what?
July 2018, HackPra, Bochum
A student's life ago, the author somehow managed to graduate.
On the way, he made a lot of mistakes -- and he still does.
A few people since called him 'successful', but LOL, if only they knew....
And now, the author will do another (big!) mistake:
instead of hiding in shame as he probably should,
he'll share his mistakes with anyone bored enough to attend,
in the hope that he's the last person to ever look that dumb to commit such mistakes.
If you're a genius and you know what to do in life, please skip this. Seriously.
If, like the author at the time, you wonder WTF is going on with graduation, professional work and life,
then hopefully you learn a few things. Maybe.
Btw the author is 42 (WTF - old!).
Maybe that will help to provide a few answers.
Abstract
-
Lifefor
graduates
Alternate title
of this talk =>
Or - to be exact -
“An attempt at making graduates’ life less miserable
and sharing the countless mistakes the author did”
(but that didn’t fit on the book cover)
Disclaimer:
Thistalkis
totallyexperimental!
Your life so far...
...a long tunnel...
...a long succession
of tests & grades...
Goals
1- Get a diploma
2- …?
After years of effort, the end of the tunnel is near!
Now what?
1. Find a (perfect) job
2. Work (follow your dear leader)
3. Retire (rich, famous and happy)
(Do you believe in Santa too?)
Plan
...another succession of tunnels?
Wait! Isn’t that….
Breaking the rule
Elia Colombo
You might want
to escape!
It's more like...
...you’re on your own!
Goals
1- Survive (find a job)
2- ...be happy? (optional)
Story time
About the speaker (½)
Reverse engineer at Google
Pwnie Award 2017 of Crypto
Pwnie for Best Cryptographic Attack
Awarded to the researchers who discovered the most impactful cryptographic attack against real-world
systems, protocols, or algorithms. This isn't some academic conference where we care about theoretical
minutiae in obscure algorithms, this category requires actual pwnage.
The first collision for full SHA-1
Credit: Marc Stevens, Elie Bursztein, Pierre Karpman, Ange Albertini, Yarik Markov
The SHAttered attack team generated the first known collision for full SHA-1. The team produced two
PDF documents that were different that produced the same SHA-1 hash. The techniques used to do
this led to an a 100k speed increase over the brute force attack that relies on the birthday paradox,
making this attack practical by a reasonably (Valasek-rich?) well funded adversary. A practical collision
like this, moves folks still relying on a deprecated protocol to action.
Dreamjob?
Dreamaward?
https://pwnies.com/winners/
Disclaimer:
Thesearemyownviews.
Notfrom
anyofmyemployers.
Story time
About the speaker (2/2)
Studied at University. Made lots of mistakes in my career.
Here to share them. Hopefully it can help someone else.
2x older than a student. At half career. With a son as ½ student.
A multicultural career and family. (to give you different perspectives)
Note I'm not here to hurt or make fun of anyone, but I don't want to give stupid illusions, popular opinions or spread hype.
I'll also use my experience as examples: I'm biased - deal with it.
Notethat
theseslidesareneutral,
Butthetalkwillmention
Manyextrapersonalexamples.
->”Storytime”
TBH I feel like an idiot.
Also, I can barely code.
Seriously.
I have troubles with code scope, variable naming…
I wish I was smart enough to have done fewer mistakes.
But I’m not “smart” in that regard:
I need a lot of attempts to do anything.
This talk is not for “winners”!
Why ?
Why do we need to study X?
What is it useful for?
Is there a reason for these things to be studied?
During studies, the big question was always...
What's actually important...
this talk is not about
hating or rejecting.
It’s about understanding your environment,
assuming your mistakes,
and finding your own friction-less path.
Don't get it wrong,
Forgive
You'll spare some energy for yourself.
Try walking in their shoes before blaming.
Do not forget
That's nitro for your willpower.
On education
Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it
will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.
- Albert Einstein
FakeQuote
We are all
formed by molds
Environment, family, school.
You had to follow rules and guidelines.
And now, you're "free"
(but you didn't feel in jail - you were just guided)
but it can be hard to notice it.
Not so many possibilities!
Failure was not an option.
Toddlers learn by trying and failing.
School has no time for that.
You must get it right before the next test.
Story time
Trends & Myths
- Worship the top
- Praise the upper middle
- Shame the bottom
- Easy success, single-handed victories, instant wins
- Doing good -> fame -> money == appearance
Story time
We all have
blinders
Experience -> Perspective -> Whole picture
All advice is biased.
don't blame others for not sharing your perspective.
Listen, be inspired, but don't follow or worship.
(because their perspectives might not be a good fit for you)
Story time
1991
1994
1995
1997
1998
1999
2000
2003
2004
2006
2008
2009
2010
2011
2012
How old are you?
Firm
Amazon
Netflix
Google
Salesforce
Tesla
Facebook
Twitter
Airbnb
Uber
It's hard to share perspective when
so many important things are recent.
The foundations of your values
might be obsolete soon !
Language
Python
Java[Script] Ruby PHP
C#
Scala
Go
Rust
Kotlin
Julia
Story time
Pride creates unneeded friction
It’s ok to be proud of our values, but some of them could vanish instantly,
Then we realize how useless they were all along.
You’ve been guided most of your life.
It's hard to acknowledge how many of our values are actually personal.
(and not taught).
Story time
Motivation
is vital
There are things we love. There are things we hate.
Invest time in the ones you really like.
Sounds obvious? Well…
what about the little things that you liked,
before university started taking most of your time ?
But at the same time...
Story time
A few non-obvious things
to pay attention to...
Firstly,
most importantest...
A correct level of
english!
Being comfortable in an international english conversation really helps.
It’s sad to see experienced people being stuck by this.
It’s not about losing your roots,
speaking international english will not make you a royalist ;)
AttitudeIf you play with fire, you get burned.
It’s OK to be different,
but everyone has their limit
(and then bullies will pay back).
Story time
Karma is a b*tch.
life comes at you fast !
Your thoughts and words have more impact than you think.
“Respect” is not “authority”.
Try swapping roles!
Your diploma/experience is no excuse!
Arrogance only shows how narrow-minded you are.
Being insecure is human. Being a jerk is not OK.
It’s pretty sad to see employees behave like they were the founders TBH.
Story time
The most impressive persons I worked with:
- humble, honest, patient (with everyone).
- No waste of time trying to impress or diminish others.
- attractive by nature, not by trying to be someone else.
Like young kids showing you what they built: “I did X” (and I had a lot of fun)
Remember when you were a kid, before all these molds came in your life.
It’s not about acting or forcing yourself. It’s about finding your playground.
What’s a “star” ?
“Be yourself”
It’s not about “rejecting”,
It’s about being honest with yourself:
If you hate X, then admit that
you shouldn’t do it too long.
But you can’t hate everything,
otherwise you’re just a useless hater ;)
Health
You’re not ‘smart’ if you’re healthy.
You’re just lucky enough.
There’s no health credit.
Take care of yourself!
Buy that better pillow, brighter lamp,
get rid of these uncomfortable shoes !
(if it's for your health)
Story time
what did you study for?
Now let's see...
School usually provides a unique form of learning. Find your own!
Story time
(job zero)
Story time
School and job market
differs vastly.
School only covers a subset of skills.
You have more useful skills than what was acknowledged at school.
(even if it’s not taught at school [yet])
Story time
You don’t need more skills.
You already have many skills.
You need to understand your skills,
their strengths and weaknesses.
You may lack experience for now, but that’s another problem.
Story time
You don’t need to be the best.
You just need some skills.
Is your local bakery the best in the world ?
Classes make it easy to rank people, and focus only on the best.
You just need to be "better" than the others available.
And you’re not “too late” on the market. You won’t be the best anyway.
(Unless you create something new)
Story time
Make an inventory of your skills
Try and list what you like(d) that...
...isn’t taught in school.
...was taught in a different way.
...you had no time to try.
Checklist
- A proper level of english
- A good attitude - be honest with yourself, try to swap roles.
- Understand your skills, likes and dislikes.
- Spending a little time making your life more comfortable.
That's all you need. You have skills. You can learn more on the job.
Story time
Now, let’s find a job!
Independent
Very intense. Very risky.
Requires dedication!
Story time
Start-up
Be ready to do everything!
A single day can drastically change a lot of things!
The ship might sink at any moment.
Story time
BigCorp
OpenSpace, meetings, culture,
Bureaucracy, politics, territorialism.
Academia
A few things to keep in mind
Gaming, politics, promotions, stability, meetings...
It’s tempting to “take shortcuts”,
but trust is hard to regain.
btw: hate the game, not the players.
Every system can be gamed
Coincidentally,
the “players” are always the ones saying
“that’s how it works” ;)
Final metric: scored goals.
Unmeasurable and gameable: pain
Story time
How many tennis balls
can you store in a tube?
Metrics
The measured unit can be
totally irrelevant.
It's critical to reevaluate them!
Of course, gamers will object.
Story time
Politics
It’s a full time job!
Ready to waste all your time & energy ?
(better yell at clouds)
Story time
Promotions
Many companies cheat here [quotas, politics].
Golden handcuffs ? (people often step down)
More bureaucracy, more politics for more money and a shiny title.
Promotion is just one form of reward. There are plenty others.
Story time
There’s no stable situation.
Heaven <- external events -> hell
(different manager, schedule...)
Two nearby teams can work totally differently...
There's no perfect, permanent job
Story time
Meetings
The regular sh*tshow of ego and mediocrity.
Use it to get inspiration or relax :)
Forgive, don’t forget ;)
Story time
hard work pays!
Working now gives you more control of the future.
If you can easily estimate
how many times you tried,
you probably didn’t try enough ;)
But remember...
Story time
Job interviewA filtering ceremony, full of weird rituals.
Rare and critical moments,
so apply often to get more confidence!
(for next time even if you fail)!
Story time
Be honest, be yourself!
Not knowing is fine.
Admitting it guides the interviewer.
(You could fit in a different position)
Story time
Don't be (too) silent
Silence has too many interpretations.
Even if you're stuck, just explain your reasoning.
It’s normal to be nervous:
No need to over-apologize for that.
Think of an interview as a normal conversation
with an expert giving you their time and preparing something for you.
Story time
Not all employers
are worth it
Some interviewers are just *ssh*les.
Salary, advantages… but also:
Stable situation?
Is the person giving you orders
also responsible for you?
Also, f*ck unpaid internships.
(stockholm syndrome?)
Story time
Social media
- Great to connect w/ peers
- Good information stream
(filtered, flood)
- fun
Social media
- Followers count is great for the ego
but not that useful in practice
- Huge echo chamber
- Mob behavior
- Drowned in an ocean of b*llshit
Story time
“Bored” ?
Fate gave you time. Find out why!
there’s probably an inspiration floating near you.
Catch it!
Stay focused and disconnected:
that's time for yourself!
Story time
Don’t auto-save: write down!
Your talk/project has been cancelled?
Don’t worry, you still gained experience, but you need to preserve it!
Write it down nicely, so that you can easily get back to it!
It’s for yourself! Even if no one is interested anymore.
(you might be actually very close to success)
Auto-save
Story time
Some advice...
How to be the … BEST !
(At something)
Now, the ultimate secret...
Create your own
new thing!
Do something long enough. See what’s missing. Try to fill the gap.
Don’t expect people to see what you see.
(only you can see your idea, and nobody will work on it if you don't)
Listen to advice, but persist. Don’t hype, be honest.
Write down and expand your ideas (Go offline)
If you think you don't belong to this world, you were made to create your own.
Story time
Reverse psychology
sometimes works.
Sometimes nothing works better than
the “right” person telling you you can’t do it.
making a bet / commitment (with a deadline) also helps.
Story time
You have nothing
to lose!
Don't say "do it!",
because it requires confidence.
"Just try/let’s have fun” is enough.
"F*ck it" also works ;)
Be honest with your mistakes. Assume them.
Kill your own project early! (You got experience anyway!)
Ask for honest (direct, but constructive) feedback.
No need to find excuses, to hide behind lies or hype.
So, lose with dignity, honesty, and don’t forget where you come from.
The only person you should compare yourself to is who you were yesterday.
It’s OK to stop
Story time
“How can I…”
What did you try?
Face it: if after [X time], you never tried,
Then you were probably never interested ;)
And if you still hate it after X tries,
then be honest and move on ;)
Story time
Free time
We can't have enough free time.
- Use every little piece of it
- Be honest with yourself
and replace trends with
what you really like
(Both are hard TBH)
Story time
Relations
Everyone has different expectations,
understanding of the same situation.
Explain how you feel, it will guide others.
A good relation is about balance, not control.
(and not being controlled)
the 5 love languages:
gifts, time, touch, service, words.
Story time
How it should work
(the myth of a perfect life)
Optimally,
they all converge around a single skill.
SkillPassion Talent
Money
Useful 生き甲斐
iki gai
https://informationisbeautiful.net/visualizations/ikigai-japanese-concept-to-enhance-work-life-sense-of-worth/
In reality...
Actual usefulness is optional.
(Flunkies, goons, duct tapers, box tickers, taskmasters)
Passion and Money are separate.
(one follows your heart,
the other life constraints)
Hopefully, they partially overlap.
Useful
Passion Happiness
Talent Moneyfuel
fun
Don’t over worry,
what could go wrong?
Most mistakes can be undone.
So there’s no reason to worry.
Seriously, what could be the worst mistake?
The biggest mistake is...
Having kids is hard
Having kids will just make everything harder!
You can’t be ready enough.
Don’t have kids unless you feel ready and happy!
(Don’t worry, opportunity will come.)
But kids only worsen any relationship problems.
Compared to having kids,
Office work is very predictable!
Story time
Death: just the last action in your own game.
Story time
What will you do
until that point ?
InfoSec lacks honesty
I know that honesty is optional to make money.
But seriously, so much noise...
A rant, a.k.a. Things you could improve:
InfoSec and metrics
Security doesn't have easy metrics.
So defense is very political.
Defense's addictive endless loop (wait, react, hype)
- Brag about how good you are [do nothing's waiting loop]
- Detect a problem
- Measure the pwnage (ignore it if it's not possible)
- Quickly fix the bug! (no change in-depth needed)
- brag how fast you reacted, and how much you've saved
Rinse, repeat.
Story time
Binary sociology (observe without understanding nor solving)
Required pre-condition: sit on some exclusive data.
- A new something is out.
- Milk your data, shake your graphs until WoW factor is reached.
- Hasty attribution optional
- B*llshit your way into a conference
- Brag about visibility and impact
Actual impact: none
Fake defense research
- Start something (mix trendy concepts with buzzwords, actual usefulness is optional)
- Get some results (with no practical impact)
- Shake results until some WOW factor can be concluded (but not reproduced)
- Bullsh*t your way in a conference.
Publish minimal source or maybe even useless binary (works reliably on hello world)
Conclude your project is an international success.
Great visibility for you. Actual impact: null.
Fake attacks
- Find [accidentally] a vulnerability of some kind (not necessarily new)
[understanding not required]
- Logo, website, stickers, trailer, song
- Apply at a conference. Bullsh*t the abstract.
- Share as few details as possible.
Optionally publish minimal source/ useless binary
Conclude your project is an international success.
Actual impact: null.
More honest talks please
- Stop the hype
Be honest with your results. With the impact.
- Mention previous art:
Don't pretend you did something totally new (if you didn't).
- Mention where you failed. What went wrong,
or just took long (-er than expected).
Pretending that wins are instant only backfires.
It's up to you.
Don't act surprised
when your credibility is gone.
Is a big infosec crash coming?
What kind of player are you?
</rant>Story time
CTF
A good way to hone your pwning skills
But like school/pentest, it only focuses on quick and doable wins.
There’s a lot more to Infosec (impossible looking challenges, minor cogs…)
It celebrates the breaker and skip the tedious work of the maker.
Story time
Conclusion
There's no shortcut, really.
There's no point in trying to fully imitate someone else.
You're very different from anyone else.
Try different things. Connect outside your bubble.
急がば回れ
isogabamaware
Hopefully you don't make the same mistakes.
Or maybe you just feel better when you do your own.
It's scary!
Scary to do things no one else did. Scary to fail. Scary to be laughed at.
Maybe only the despair of a boring job without any future can give you the energy.
You need to fall completely before you can stand up again.
If your fall takes too long, leave your comfort zone to get more motivation!
Honestly
Story time
A few more points
AKA "a bunch of mindmaps".
Acknowledgement: Moritz
Thanks!
Feedback?

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Beyond your studies

  • 1. Ange Albertini Beyond your studiesYou studied X at Y. now what? July 2018, HackPra, Bochum
  • 2. A student's life ago, the author somehow managed to graduate. On the way, he made a lot of mistakes -- and he still does. A few people since called him 'successful', but LOL, if only they knew.... And now, the author will do another (big!) mistake: instead of hiding in shame as he probably should, he'll share his mistakes with anyone bored enough to attend, in the hope that he's the last person to ever look that dumb to commit such mistakes. If you're a genius and you know what to do in life, please skip this. Seriously. If, like the author at the time, you wonder WTF is going on with graduation, professional work and life, then hopefully you learn a few things. Maybe. Btw the author is 42 (WTF - old!). Maybe that will help to provide a few answers. Abstract
  • 3. - Lifefor graduates Alternate title of this talk => Or - to be exact - “An attempt at making graduates’ life less miserable and sharing the countless mistakes the author did” (but that didn’t fit on the book cover) Disclaimer: Thistalkis totallyexperimental!
  • 4. Your life so far... ...a long tunnel...
  • 5. ...a long succession of tests & grades...
  • 6. Goals 1- Get a diploma 2- …?
  • 7. After years of effort, the end of the tunnel is near!
  • 9. 1. Find a (perfect) job 2. Work (follow your dear leader) 3. Retire (rich, famous and happy) (Do you believe in Santa too?) Plan
  • 10. ...another succession of tunnels? Wait! Isn’t that….
  • 11. Breaking the rule Elia Colombo You might want to escape!
  • 14. Goals 1- Survive (find a job) 2- ...be happy? (optional) Story time
  • 15. About the speaker (½) Reverse engineer at Google Pwnie Award 2017 of Crypto Pwnie for Best Cryptographic Attack Awarded to the researchers who discovered the most impactful cryptographic attack against real-world systems, protocols, or algorithms. This isn't some academic conference where we care about theoretical minutiae in obscure algorithms, this category requires actual pwnage. The first collision for full SHA-1 Credit: Marc Stevens, Elie Bursztein, Pierre Karpman, Ange Albertini, Yarik Markov The SHAttered attack team generated the first known collision for full SHA-1. The team produced two PDF documents that were different that produced the same SHA-1 hash. The techniques used to do this led to an a 100k speed increase over the brute force attack that relies on the birthday paradox, making this attack practical by a reasonably (Valasek-rich?) well funded adversary. A practical collision like this, moves folks still relying on a deprecated protocol to action. Dreamjob? Dreamaward? https://pwnies.com/winners/ Disclaimer: Thesearemyownviews. Notfrom anyofmyemployers. Story time
  • 16. About the speaker (2/2) Studied at University. Made lots of mistakes in my career. Here to share them. Hopefully it can help someone else. 2x older than a student. At half career. With a son as ½ student. A multicultural career and family. (to give you different perspectives) Note I'm not here to hurt or make fun of anyone, but I don't want to give stupid illusions, popular opinions or spread hype. I'll also use my experience as examples: I'm biased - deal with it. Notethat theseslidesareneutral, Butthetalkwillmention Manyextrapersonalexamples. ->”Storytime”
  • 17. TBH I feel like an idiot. Also, I can barely code. Seriously. I have troubles with code scope, variable naming… I wish I was smart enough to have done fewer mistakes. But I’m not “smart” in that regard: I need a lot of attempts to do anything. This talk is not for “winners”!
  • 18. Why ? Why do we need to study X? What is it useful for? Is there a reason for these things to be studied? During studies, the big question was always...
  • 20. this talk is not about hating or rejecting. It’s about understanding your environment, assuming your mistakes, and finding your own friction-less path. Don't get it wrong,
  • 21. Forgive You'll spare some energy for yourself. Try walking in their shoes before blaming. Do not forget That's nitro for your willpower.
  • 23. Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein FakeQuote
  • 24. We are all formed by molds Environment, family, school. You had to follow rules and guidelines. And now, you're "free" (but you didn't feel in jail - you were just guided) but it can be hard to notice it. Not so many possibilities!
  • 25. Failure was not an option. Toddlers learn by trying and failing. School has no time for that. You must get it right before the next test. Story time
  • 26. Trends & Myths - Worship the top - Praise the upper middle - Shame the bottom - Easy success, single-handed victories, instant wins - Doing good -> fame -> money == appearance Story time
  • 27. We all have blinders Experience -> Perspective -> Whole picture All advice is biased. don't blame others for not sharing your perspective. Listen, be inspired, but don't follow or worship. (because their perspectives might not be a good fit for you) Story time
  • 28. 1991 1994 1995 1997 1998 1999 2000 2003 2004 2006 2008 2009 2010 2011 2012 How old are you? Firm Amazon Netflix Google Salesforce Tesla Facebook Twitter Airbnb Uber It's hard to share perspective when so many important things are recent. The foundations of your values might be obsolete soon ! Language Python Java[Script] Ruby PHP C# Scala Go Rust Kotlin Julia Story time
  • 29. Pride creates unneeded friction It’s ok to be proud of our values, but some of them could vanish instantly, Then we realize how useless they were all along. You’ve been guided most of your life. It's hard to acknowledge how many of our values are actually personal. (and not taught). Story time
  • 30. Motivation is vital There are things we love. There are things we hate. Invest time in the ones you really like. Sounds obvious? Well… what about the little things that you liked, before university started taking most of your time ? But at the same time... Story time
  • 31. A few non-obvious things to pay attention to...
  • 33. A correct level of english! Being comfortable in an international english conversation really helps. It’s sad to see experienced people being stuck by this. It’s not about losing your roots, speaking international english will not make you a royalist ;)
  • 34. AttitudeIf you play with fire, you get burned. It’s OK to be different, but everyone has their limit (and then bullies will pay back). Story time
  • 35. Karma is a b*tch. life comes at you fast !
  • 36. Your thoughts and words have more impact than you think. “Respect” is not “authority”. Try swapping roles!
  • 37. Your diploma/experience is no excuse! Arrogance only shows how narrow-minded you are. Being insecure is human. Being a jerk is not OK. It’s pretty sad to see employees behave like they were the founders TBH. Story time
  • 38. The most impressive persons I worked with: - humble, honest, patient (with everyone). - No waste of time trying to impress or diminish others. - attractive by nature, not by trying to be someone else. Like young kids showing you what they built: “I did X” (and I had a lot of fun) Remember when you were a kid, before all these molds came in your life. It’s not about acting or forcing yourself. It’s about finding your playground. What’s a “star” ?
  • 39. “Be yourself” It’s not about “rejecting”, It’s about being honest with yourself: If you hate X, then admit that you shouldn’t do it too long. But you can’t hate everything, otherwise you’re just a useless hater ;)
  • 40. Health You’re not ‘smart’ if you’re healthy. You’re just lucky enough. There’s no health credit. Take care of yourself! Buy that better pillow, brighter lamp, get rid of these uncomfortable shoes ! (if it's for your health) Story time
  • 41. what did you study for? Now let's see...
  • 42. School usually provides a unique form of learning. Find your own! Story time
  • 44. School and job market differs vastly. School only covers a subset of skills. You have more useful skills than what was acknowledged at school. (even if it’s not taught at school [yet]) Story time
  • 45. You don’t need more skills. You already have many skills. You need to understand your skills, their strengths and weaknesses. You may lack experience for now, but that’s another problem. Story time
  • 46. You don’t need to be the best. You just need some skills. Is your local bakery the best in the world ? Classes make it easy to rank people, and focus only on the best. You just need to be "better" than the others available. And you’re not “too late” on the market. You won’t be the best anyway. (Unless you create something new) Story time
  • 47. Make an inventory of your skills Try and list what you like(d) that... ...isn’t taught in school. ...was taught in a different way. ...you had no time to try.
  • 48. Checklist - A proper level of english - A good attitude - be honest with yourself, try to swap roles. - Understand your skills, likes and dislikes. - Spending a little time making your life more comfortable. That's all you need. You have skills. You can learn more on the job. Story time
  • 50. Independent Very intense. Very risky. Requires dedication! Story time
  • 51. Start-up Be ready to do everything! A single day can drastically change a lot of things! The ship might sink at any moment. Story time
  • 54. A few things to keep in mind Gaming, politics, promotions, stability, meetings...
  • 55. It’s tempting to “take shortcuts”, but trust is hard to regain. btw: hate the game, not the players. Every system can be gamed Coincidentally, the “players” are always the ones saying “that’s how it works” ;) Final metric: scored goals. Unmeasurable and gameable: pain Story time
  • 56. How many tennis balls can you store in a tube? Metrics The measured unit can be totally irrelevant. It's critical to reevaluate them! Of course, gamers will object. Story time
  • 57. Politics It’s a full time job! Ready to waste all your time & energy ? (better yell at clouds) Story time
  • 58. Promotions Many companies cheat here [quotas, politics]. Golden handcuffs ? (people often step down) More bureaucracy, more politics for more money and a shiny title. Promotion is just one form of reward. There are plenty others. Story time
  • 59. There’s no stable situation. Heaven <- external events -> hell (different manager, schedule...) Two nearby teams can work totally differently... There's no perfect, permanent job Story time
  • 60. Meetings The regular sh*tshow of ego and mediocrity. Use it to get inspiration or relax :) Forgive, don’t forget ;) Story time
  • 61. hard work pays! Working now gives you more control of the future. If you can easily estimate how many times you tried, you probably didn’t try enough ;) But remember... Story time
  • 62. Job interviewA filtering ceremony, full of weird rituals. Rare and critical moments, so apply often to get more confidence! (for next time even if you fail)! Story time
  • 63. Be honest, be yourself! Not knowing is fine. Admitting it guides the interviewer. (You could fit in a different position) Story time
  • 64. Don't be (too) silent Silence has too many interpretations. Even if you're stuck, just explain your reasoning. It’s normal to be nervous: No need to over-apologize for that. Think of an interview as a normal conversation with an expert giving you their time and preparing something for you. Story time
  • 65. Not all employers are worth it Some interviewers are just *ssh*les. Salary, advantages… but also: Stable situation? Is the person giving you orders also responsible for you? Also, f*ck unpaid internships. (stockholm syndrome?) Story time
  • 67. - Great to connect w/ peers - Good information stream (filtered, flood) - fun Social media - Followers count is great for the ego but not that useful in practice - Huge echo chamber - Mob behavior - Drowned in an ocean of b*llshit Story time
  • 68. “Bored” ? Fate gave you time. Find out why! there’s probably an inspiration floating near you. Catch it! Stay focused and disconnected: that's time for yourself! Story time
  • 69. Don’t auto-save: write down! Your talk/project has been cancelled? Don’t worry, you still gained experience, but you need to preserve it! Write it down nicely, so that you can easily get back to it! It’s for yourself! Even if no one is interested anymore. (you might be actually very close to success) Auto-save Story time
  • 71. How to be the … BEST ! (At something) Now, the ultimate secret...
  • 72. Create your own new thing! Do something long enough. See what’s missing. Try to fill the gap. Don’t expect people to see what you see. (only you can see your idea, and nobody will work on it if you don't) Listen to advice, but persist. Don’t hype, be honest. Write down and expand your ideas (Go offline) If you think you don't belong to this world, you were made to create your own. Story time
  • 73. Reverse psychology sometimes works. Sometimes nothing works better than the “right” person telling you you can’t do it. making a bet / commitment (with a deadline) also helps. Story time
  • 74. You have nothing to lose! Don't say "do it!", because it requires confidence. "Just try/let’s have fun” is enough. "F*ck it" also works ;)
  • 75. Be honest with your mistakes. Assume them. Kill your own project early! (You got experience anyway!) Ask for honest (direct, but constructive) feedback. No need to find excuses, to hide behind lies or hype. So, lose with dignity, honesty, and don’t forget where you come from. The only person you should compare yourself to is who you were yesterday. It’s OK to stop Story time
  • 76. “How can I…” What did you try? Face it: if after [X time], you never tried, Then you were probably never interested ;) And if you still hate it after X tries, then be honest and move on ;) Story time
  • 77. Free time We can't have enough free time. - Use every little piece of it - Be honest with yourself and replace trends with what you really like (Both are hard TBH) Story time
  • 78. Relations Everyone has different expectations, understanding of the same situation. Explain how you feel, it will guide others. A good relation is about balance, not control. (and not being controlled) the 5 love languages: gifts, time, touch, service, words. Story time
  • 79. How it should work (the myth of a perfect life) Optimally, they all converge around a single skill. SkillPassion Talent Money Useful 生き甲斐 iki gai https://informationisbeautiful.net/visualizations/ikigai-japanese-concept-to-enhance-work-life-sense-of-worth/
  • 80. In reality... Actual usefulness is optional. (Flunkies, goons, duct tapers, box tickers, taskmasters) Passion and Money are separate. (one follows your heart, the other life constraints) Hopefully, they partially overlap. Useful Passion Happiness Talent Moneyfuel fun
  • 81. Don’t over worry, what could go wrong? Most mistakes can be undone. So there’s no reason to worry. Seriously, what could be the worst mistake?
  • 83. Having kids is hard Having kids will just make everything harder! You can’t be ready enough. Don’t have kids unless you feel ready and happy! (Don’t worry, opportunity will come.) But kids only worsen any relationship problems. Compared to having kids, Office work is very predictable! Story time
  • 84. Death: just the last action in your own game. Story time What will you do until that point ?
  • 85. InfoSec lacks honesty I know that honesty is optional to make money. But seriously, so much noise... A rant, a.k.a. Things you could improve:
  • 86. InfoSec and metrics Security doesn't have easy metrics. So defense is very political.
  • 87. Defense's addictive endless loop (wait, react, hype) - Brag about how good you are [do nothing's waiting loop] - Detect a problem - Measure the pwnage (ignore it if it's not possible) - Quickly fix the bug! (no change in-depth needed) - brag how fast you reacted, and how much you've saved Rinse, repeat. Story time
  • 88. Binary sociology (observe without understanding nor solving) Required pre-condition: sit on some exclusive data. - A new something is out. - Milk your data, shake your graphs until WoW factor is reached. - Hasty attribution optional - B*llshit your way into a conference - Brag about visibility and impact Actual impact: none
  • 89. Fake defense research - Start something (mix trendy concepts with buzzwords, actual usefulness is optional) - Get some results (with no practical impact) - Shake results until some WOW factor can be concluded (but not reproduced) - Bullsh*t your way in a conference. Publish minimal source or maybe even useless binary (works reliably on hello world) Conclude your project is an international success. Great visibility for you. Actual impact: null.
  • 90. Fake attacks - Find [accidentally] a vulnerability of some kind (not necessarily new) [understanding not required] - Logo, website, stickers, trailer, song - Apply at a conference. Bullsh*t the abstract. - Share as few details as possible. Optionally publish minimal source/ useless binary Conclude your project is an international success. Actual impact: null.
  • 91. More honest talks please - Stop the hype Be honest with your results. With the impact. - Mention previous art: Don't pretend you did something totally new (if you didn't). - Mention where you failed. What went wrong, or just took long (-er than expected). Pretending that wins are instant only backfires.
  • 92. It's up to you. Don't act surprised when your credibility is gone. Is a big infosec crash coming? What kind of player are you? </rant>Story time
  • 93. CTF A good way to hone your pwning skills But like school/pentest, it only focuses on quick and doable wins. There’s a lot more to Infosec (impossible looking challenges, minor cogs…) It celebrates the breaker and skip the tedious work of the maker. Story time
  • 95. There's no shortcut, really. There's no point in trying to fully imitate someone else. You're very different from anyone else. Try different things. Connect outside your bubble. 急がば回れ isogabamaware
  • 96. Hopefully you don't make the same mistakes. Or maybe you just feel better when you do your own.
  • 97. It's scary! Scary to do things no one else did. Scary to fail. Scary to be laughed at. Maybe only the despair of a boring job without any future can give you the energy. You need to fall completely before you can stand up again. If your fall takes too long, leave your comfort zone to get more motivation! Honestly Story time
  • 98. A few more points AKA "a bunch of mindmaps".