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English 111
Instructor: Andrea Anderson
Unit #1 Essay
Community Profile
Community Profile: Preparation
Look at the Assignment Sheet in the Unit #1 folder on Blackboard
Community Profile: Preparation
 According to The Norton Field Guide,
a profile is a written portrait of a
place. It presents a subject in an
entertaining way that conveys its
significance, showing us something
that we may not have known existed
or that we see everyday but don’t
know much about.
 GET STARTED: Read Chapter 16 -
Profiles
 Also read Chapters 37, 38, and
40 – Describing, Dialogue, and
Narrating.
 Read the example essay (On
Blackboard)
Understanding the Assignment
All academic
essays MUST
have:
1. Introduction
Paragraph
with a Thesis
Statement
2. Body
Paragraphs
3. Conclusion
Paragraph
 Per the assignment sheet, your essay
MUST contain the following features in
the body paragraphs:
 Background Information
 Description of firsthand observations using
sensory details
 Examples of community impact or use
 Anecdote(s)
 Dialogue
 Be sure not to include too much of one
feature, and not enough of another. Use a
well-balanced combination of each!
Background Information
 This feature informs the reader of all pertinent
information about this place. This is factual
information.
 Examples of background information include:
 What the place is/does
 Where the place is
 When the place was created
 Why the place was created and by who
 Why the community needs or wants this place
 Remember – this is NOT a report, so don’t
include too much background information.
Example(s) of Community Impact, Use,
or Importance
 Find a true and specific example of how this place is
impacting the community, being used by the
community, or of importance to the community.
 Examples – a specific example of how a non-profit is benefiting
people receiving services, a specific example of community use
for trail systems, an example of a restaurant serving as a
gathering place for community groups.
 You can find this information from talking to people or
from your own personal experience.
Description Using Sensory Details
 You MUST visit your place to gain a further understanding of
your subject. While there you should record your firsthand
observations.
 In your paper you must include descriptions of your firsthand
observations using sensory details. Sensory details help to bring
your subject to life by appealing to the different senses of the
reader.
 In academic writing you are typically discouraged from using
the word “I.” You should refrain from using it. After all, this is
a paper about a place, not you.
 NO - When I walked into the office, the smell of coffee
overwhelmed me.
 YES - The smell of coffee overwhelms the senses immediately upon
entering the office.
Dialogue
 You need to talk to other people about your place. Ask
them questions about your place to discover what they
think about the place and what their experiences with the
place are. Include quotes (both direct and indirect) from
your conversation.
 Be sure that the dialogue that you include helps support
your angle!
 Integrate the dialogue into your writing. For more
information on the importance of using quotations and
how to integrate them, see Chapter 38 on page 376.
Anecdote(s)
 An anecdote is a short and interesting story about a
specific incident, person, or place
 Interesting does not necessarily mean funny. The
anecdote should help define and support the angle
you are taking.
 The anecdote could be about the place or maybe even
someone who works there.
 The anecdote can be based on your own experience or
that of someone else.
 Did you:
Read the Unit #1 Assignment Sheet
Read Chapter 16 in The Norton Field Guide to Writing
Read the example essay (on Blackboard)
Now it is time to GET STARTED WITH THE WRITING PROCESS
Writing Process Step #1
 Pre-Writing
 Choose a Subject
 Choose an Angle
 Brainstorming/Outlining –
what you already know
 Research – what you need
to find out
Later Writing Process
Steps to Consider
 Writing
 Revising
 Editing
 Publishing
Choosing a Subject
For this
assignment, you
will write a profile
of an interesting
place in your
community that is
worth talking
about.
If you are having
trouble getting
started, any of the
places on the
assignment sheet
would make great
subjects. Or, you
might as a friend
and write about
somewhere that is
new to you!
 Choose a place that you!
 The best wrought papers evolve from
writing about a subject that you are
intrigued by.
 You’ll be spending a LOT of time on this
assignment over the next three weeks…
don’t start the assignment bored.
 Sometimes (not always) it is best to write
about a place that you don’t know too
much about.
 This allows you a fresh perspective and a
chance to research and investigate before
you begin writing.
 Remember – this has to be a place that
anyone can visit without needing an
invitation.
Choosing an Angle
A good profile
captures its
subject from an
interesting
ANGLE.
For an example,
look at the next
slide of a profile
introduction
paragraph written
by an English 111
student.
 When writing your profile, do NOT try to tell
the reader everything about the place. You
need to write on a narrow topic.
 Your profile needs to be organized around
ONE specific idea or theme. This idea is
called your angle, and your angle will help
unite the various paragraphs of your essay.
 When choosing an ANGLE, consider the
following question: What ONE aspect do
you want to tell the reader about this
place?
 Choose your angle before you write…it will help
you stay on subject from the very beginning.
Profile Angle Example
Taken from Profile Essay Introduction Paragraph
Written by English 111 Student
Grey Cliffs is in danger. This unknown piece of
wilderness is located fifteen miles north of Nikiski, Alaska, and
land development threatens its seemingly untouched
landscape. For those that know and love this little place off the
beaten path, it is an important that it stays this way. There has
been discussion over the past few years to extend the Kenai
Spur Highway north to Moose Point where it would meet a
bridge built across Turnagain Arm to Anchorage. This multi-
million dollar project would create an alternative route from the
Kenai Peninsula to Anchorage while simultaneously destroying
Grey Cliffs. This area is worth preserving for future generations
of Alaskans to enjoy. Grey Cliffs is a haven for camping and off
the grid living on the bustling Kenai Peninsula.
Profile Angle Example
Taken from Profile Essay Introduction Paragraph
Written by English 111 Student
 The thesis statement for this student’s essay says, “Grey
Cliffs is a haven for camping and off the grid living on
the bustling Kenai Peninsula.”
 The angle is made clear in the thesis statement. The rest
of this essay proves that Grey Cliffs is a little known, quiet
place that is great for camping and off the grid living. It is
a haven on the busy Kenai Peninsula.
 The angle is not about preserving Grey Cliffs. A paper
arguing for the preservation of Grey Cliffs would be a
totally different assignment. The body paragraphs don’t
explicitly state that the place is worth preserving, but the
student author re-touches on that in the conclusion. The
body paragraphs prove this point by SHOWING what a
haven Grey Cliffs is.
Profile Angle Example
Example Essay (On Blackboard)
 In the profile “Communicating with Art,” the author writes
profiles the Alzheimer’s Resources of Alaska.
 Alzheimer’s Resources of Alaska provides many resources
to patients and the families of patients with Alzheimer’s
disease. However, the author did NOT cover all of these
aspects.
 The author chose to show the reader how the Art Links
program “is a creative outlet for participants experiencing
cognitive and memory difficulties.” That is her angle.
 Each paragraph supports the angle she chose to make a
focused and convincing essay.
Just a Reminder…
DUE: Saturday, October 12
ASSIGNMENT: Submit Your Topic
You need to create a post in Unit #1
Topic Discussion that tells me and your
classmates what subject you have
chosen, why you chose it, and what
angle you will take in your writing.
This is ESSENTIAL in getting started on a
good note. I will provide you with
prompt feedback regarding your topics.
Pre-Writing: Brainstorming/Outlining
Don’t sit down and start writing without pre-writing. Brainstorming helps you to
get your ideas flowing and outlining helps you to get organized before you start
writing your paragraphs.
 Brainstorming Styles
 Free-Writing
 Looping
 Listing
 Clustering
 Cubing
 Questioning
 For more information on
brainstorming styles, see
Chapter 23, pages 219-222
 Outlining Example
I. Introduction
I. Hook…get reader’s
attention
II. Thesis statement
II. Body
I. Background Information
II. Description using sensory
details.
III. Example of community use,
with dialogue
IV. Anecdote, with dialogue
V. Anecdote #2
III. Conclusion
 For more information on
outlining, see Chapter 23,
pages 223
Outlining: Grey Cliffs
This outline is incomplete: Red Highlighting indicates where the student has more work to do.
WRITING!
Now its time to site down and write.
Be sure:
•Received feedback from the instructor
on your topic and angle.
•You have done your research
•You have brainstormed and/or outlined
your paper
•You have reviewed the Unit #1
Assignment Sheet
•Asked for clarification on any questions.
Peer Review
 The Peer Review will begin Sunday, October 20, and end on
Saturday, October 26.
 I will assign you peer review partners and will create a peer
review group space on Blackboard for you and your partners.
Your group space allows you to share files back and forth.
TIMELINE:
 Sunday, October 20: Submit your finished draft to your group
space on Blackboard.
 Monday, October 21: I will assign you peer review partners.
 October 21 – 26: Read your partner’s paper, complete the peer
review questionnaire, and offer advice for improvement.
 Saturday, October 26: Return the completed peer review
questionnaires to your partners (and me) via email!
More specific directions for this assignment will be available on
Blackboard on October 21!
Revising and Editing
 Revise
 Look at the advise that your classmates gave you during
the peer review. Make the changes that you feel will
improve your paper.
 Two pieces of ADVICE:
 #1: Give yourself plenty of time to revise. If you can, get away
from your writing for a little while. When you return refreshed,
you will be more likely to catch errors and digressions.
 #2: Remember to make sure that this is a reader-centered paper
not a writer-centered paper. In other words, detach yourself from
your paper and revise it to assure that everything is clear and
belongs on the page. Just because you spent time writing it,
doesn’t mean it belongs in your final draft. If it doesn’t, erase it.
 Edit
 Check your paper for proper grammar, punctuation, and
usage.
Use your Resources…OWL @ KPC
 OWL is the online
writing lab at KPC. You
can submit your paper
to the OWL and get
feedback from KPC
faculty. You let them
know specifically what
you would like help
with!
http://owl.kpc.alaska.e
du
Publishing
 For the purposes of this class, publishing means
turning the final draft of your paper in for grading!
 FINAL DRAFT DUE: by Saturday, November 2 @ 11:59
pm.
 Be sure to turn it in on time, otherwise it will be
considered LATE. Late papers are penalized by deducting
20% of the possible points before grading.
 YOU WILL SUBMIT YOUR FINAL DRAFT IN
BLACKBOARD. There will be a link for you to upload
your papers in the Unit #1 Folder.
 The final draft is worth 115 points!
LECTURE: THE END
This is your first major
writing assignment for
the semester and is
designed to help you
ease (back) into
academic writing.
 If you have any questions
regarding this assignment,
please don’t hesitate to either
come to my office hours or to
email me. Be sure that you
detail exactly what it is that you
don’t understand or would like
help with.
amanderson10@kpc.alaska.edu
Revising Your Graded Paper for an
Improved Grade
A note about revision…you are allowed to revise the
first three papers if you are interested in improving your
grade.
In addition to making significant changes to improve the
paper, you are also responsible for writing an in-depth
explanation of the changes you made, why you made them,
and how the changes improve your paper. This is a time
consuming process.
In other words, it is often easier and more time efficient to
turn in your best possible work the first time.

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Unit #1 Lecture

  • 1. English 111 Instructor: Andrea Anderson Unit #1 Essay Community Profile
  • 2. Community Profile: Preparation Look at the Assignment Sheet in the Unit #1 folder on Blackboard
  • 3. Community Profile: Preparation  According to The Norton Field Guide, a profile is a written portrait of a place. It presents a subject in an entertaining way that conveys its significance, showing us something that we may not have known existed or that we see everyday but don’t know much about.  GET STARTED: Read Chapter 16 - Profiles  Also read Chapters 37, 38, and 40 – Describing, Dialogue, and Narrating.  Read the example essay (On Blackboard)
  • 4. Understanding the Assignment All academic essays MUST have: 1. Introduction Paragraph with a Thesis Statement 2. Body Paragraphs 3. Conclusion Paragraph  Per the assignment sheet, your essay MUST contain the following features in the body paragraphs:  Background Information  Description of firsthand observations using sensory details  Examples of community impact or use  Anecdote(s)  Dialogue  Be sure not to include too much of one feature, and not enough of another. Use a well-balanced combination of each!
  • 5. Background Information  This feature informs the reader of all pertinent information about this place. This is factual information.  Examples of background information include:  What the place is/does  Where the place is  When the place was created  Why the place was created and by who  Why the community needs or wants this place  Remember – this is NOT a report, so don’t include too much background information.
  • 6. Example(s) of Community Impact, Use, or Importance  Find a true and specific example of how this place is impacting the community, being used by the community, or of importance to the community.  Examples – a specific example of how a non-profit is benefiting people receiving services, a specific example of community use for trail systems, an example of a restaurant serving as a gathering place for community groups.  You can find this information from talking to people or from your own personal experience.
  • 7. Description Using Sensory Details  You MUST visit your place to gain a further understanding of your subject. While there you should record your firsthand observations.  In your paper you must include descriptions of your firsthand observations using sensory details. Sensory details help to bring your subject to life by appealing to the different senses of the reader.  In academic writing you are typically discouraged from using the word “I.” You should refrain from using it. After all, this is a paper about a place, not you.  NO - When I walked into the office, the smell of coffee overwhelmed me.  YES - The smell of coffee overwhelms the senses immediately upon entering the office.
  • 8. Dialogue  You need to talk to other people about your place. Ask them questions about your place to discover what they think about the place and what their experiences with the place are. Include quotes (both direct and indirect) from your conversation.  Be sure that the dialogue that you include helps support your angle!  Integrate the dialogue into your writing. For more information on the importance of using quotations and how to integrate them, see Chapter 38 on page 376.
  • 9. Anecdote(s)  An anecdote is a short and interesting story about a specific incident, person, or place  Interesting does not necessarily mean funny. The anecdote should help define and support the angle you are taking.  The anecdote could be about the place or maybe even someone who works there.  The anecdote can be based on your own experience or that of someone else.
  • 10.  Did you: Read the Unit #1 Assignment Sheet Read Chapter 16 in The Norton Field Guide to Writing Read the example essay (on Blackboard) Now it is time to GET STARTED WITH THE WRITING PROCESS Writing Process Step #1  Pre-Writing  Choose a Subject  Choose an Angle  Brainstorming/Outlining – what you already know  Research – what you need to find out Later Writing Process Steps to Consider  Writing  Revising  Editing  Publishing
  • 11. Choosing a Subject For this assignment, you will write a profile of an interesting place in your community that is worth talking about. If you are having trouble getting started, any of the places on the assignment sheet would make great subjects. Or, you might as a friend and write about somewhere that is new to you!  Choose a place that you!  The best wrought papers evolve from writing about a subject that you are intrigued by.  You’ll be spending a LOT of time on this assignment over the next three weeks… don’t start the assignment bored.  Sometimes (not always) it is best to write about a place that you don’t know too much about.  This allows you a fresh perspective and a chance to research and investigate before you begin writing.  Remember – this has to be a place that anyone can visit without needing an invitation.
  • 12. Choosing an Angle A good profile captures its subject from an interesting ANGLE. For an example, look at the next slide of a profile introduction paragraph written by an English 111 student.  When writing your profile, do NOT try to tell the reader everything about the place. You need to write on a narrow topic.  Your profile needs to be organized around ONE specific idea or theme. This idea is called your angle, and your angle will help unite the various paragraphs of your essay.  When choosing an ANGLE, consider the following question: What ONE aspect do you want to tell the reader about this place?  Choose your angle before you write…it will help you stay on subject from the very beginning.
  • 13. Profile Angle Example Taken from Profile Essay Introduction Paragraph Written by English 111 Student Grey Cliffs is in danger. This unknown piece of wilderness is located fifteen miles north of Nikiski, Alaska, and land development threatens its seemingly untouched landscape. For those that know and love this little place off the beaten path, it is an important that it stays this way. There has been discussion over the past few years to extend the Kenai Spur Highway north to Moose Point where it would meet a bridge built across Turnagain Arm to Anchorage. This multi- million dollar project would create an alternative route from the Kenai Peninsula to Anchorage while simultaneously destroying Grey Cliffs. This area is worth preserving for future generations of Alaskans to enjoy. Grey Cliffs is a haven for camping and off the grid living on the bustling Kenai Peninsula.
  • 14. Profile Angle Example Taken from Profile Essay Introduction Paragraph Written by English 111 Student  The thesis statement for this student’s essay says, “Grey Cliffs is a haven for camping and off the grid living on the bustling Kenai Peninsula.”  The angle is made clear in the thesis statement. The rest of this essay proves that Grey Cliffs is a little known, quiet place that is great for camping and off the grid living. It is a haven on the busy Kenai Peninsula.  The angle is not about preserving Grey Cliffs. A paper arguing for the preservation of Grey Cliffs would be a totally different assignment. The body paragraphs don’t explicitly state that the place is worth preserving, but the student author re-touches on that in the conclusion. The body paragraphs prove this point by SHOWING what a haven Grey Cliffs is.
  • 15. Profile Angle Example Example Essay (On Blackboard)  In the profile “Communicating with Art,” the author writes profiles the Alzheimer’s Resources of Alaska.  Alzheimer’s Resources of Alaska provides many resources to patients and the families of patients with Alzheimer’s disease. However, the author did NOT cover all of these aspects.  The author chose to show the reader how the Art Links program “is a creative outlet for participants experiencing cognitive and memory difficulties.” That is her angle.  Each paragraph supports the angle she chose to make a focused and convincing essay.
  • 16. Just a Reminder… DUE: Saturday, October 12 ASSIGNMENT: Submit Your Topic You need to create a post in Unit #1 Topic Discussion that tells me and your classmates what subject you have chosen, why you chose it, and what angle you will take in your writing. This is ESSENTIAL in getting started on a good note. I will provide you with prompt feedback regarding your topics.
  • 17. Pre-Writing: Brainstorming/Outlining Don’t sit down and start writing without pre-writing. Brainstorming helps you to get your ideas flowing and outlining helps you to get organized before you start writing your paragraphs.  Brainstorming Styles  Free-Writing  Looping  Listing  Clustering  Cubing  Questioning  For more information on brainstorming styles, see Chapter 23, pages 219-222  Outlining Example I. Introduction I. Hook…get reader’s attention II. Thesis statement II. Body I. Background Information II. Description using sensory details. III. Example of community use, with dialogue IV. Anecdote, with dialogue V. Anecdote #2 III. Conclusion  For more information on outlining, see Chapter 23, pages 223
  • 18. Outlining: Grey Cliffs This outline is incomplete: Red Highlighting indicates where the student has more work to do.
  • 19. WRITING! Now its time to site down and write. Be sure: •Received feedback from the instructor on your topic and angle. •You have done your research •You have brainstormed and/or outlined your paper •You have reviewed the Unit #1 Assignment Sheet •Asked for clarification on any questions.
  • 20. Peer Review  The Peer Review will begin Sunday, October 20, and end on Saturday, October 26.  I will assign you peer review partners and will create a peer review group space on Blackboard for you and your partners. Your group space allows you to share files back and forth. TIMELINE:  Sunday, October 20: Submit your finished draft to your group space on Blackboard.  Monday, October 21: I will assign you peer review partners.  October 21 – 26: Read your partner’s paper, complete the peer review questionnaire, and offer advice for improvement.  Saturday, October 26: Return the completed peer review questionnaires to your partners (and me) via email! More specific directions for this assignment will be available on Blackboard on October 21!
  • 21. Revising and Editing  Revise  Look at the advise that your classmates gave you during the peer review. Make the changes that you feel will improve your paper.  Two pieces of ADVICE:  #1: Give yourself plenty of time to revise. If you can, get away from your writing for a little while. When you return refreshed, you will be more likely to catch errors and digressions.  #2: Remember to make sure that this is a reader-centered paper not a writer-centered paper. In other words, detach yourself from your paper and revise it to assure that everything is clear and belongs on the page. Just because you spent time writing it, doesn’t mean it belongs in your final draft. If it doesn’t, erase it.  Edit  Check your paper for proper grammar, punctuation, and usage.
  • 22. Use your Resources…OWL @ KPC  OWL is the online writing lab at KPC. You can submit your paper to the OWL and get feedback from KPC faculty. You let them know specifically what you would like help with! http://owl.kpc.alaska.e du
  • 23. Publishing  For the purposes of this class, publishing means turning the final draft of your paper in for grading!  FINAL DRAFT DUE: by Saturday, November 2 @ 11:59 pm.  Be sure to turn it in on time, otherwise it will be considered LATE. Late papers are penalized by deducting 20% of the possible points before grading.  YOU WILL SUBMIT YOUR FINAL DRAFT IN BLACKBOARD. There will be a link for you to upload your papers in the Unit #1 Folder.  The final draft is worth 115 points!
  • 24. LECTURE: THE END This is your first major writing assignment for the semester and is designed to help you ease (back) into academic writing.  If you have any questions regarding this assignment, please don’t hesitate to either come to my office hours or to email me. Be sure that you detail exactly what it is that you don’t understand or would like help with. amanderson10@kpc.alaska.edu
  • 25. Revising Your Graded Paper for an Improved Grade A note about revision…you are allowed to revise the first three papers if you are interested in improving your grade. In addition to making significant changes to improve the paper, you are also responsible for writing an in-depth explanation of the changes you made, why you made them, and how the changes improve your paper. This is a time consuming process. In other words, it is often easier and more time efficient to turn in your best possible work the first time.