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WholeHe
arted –
More on
Brené
Brown
Caféchurch Melbourne 10/6/14
Contextualising for
Caféchurch
If we are distinguishing
between fide (heart
based, trust, faith) and
assensus (head based,
belief, assent), this fits
mainly (but not entirely)
within fide
The Price We Pay for
Modernity
Numb
• It turns out that you
can’t only numb some
of your emotions
• If you numb the bad
stuff, you numb the
good stuff as well.
Connection
• Our basic desire -
“what we are here for”
Authenticity
• To connect with
people, we need to be
authentic – (only?) the
real me connects with
the real you
Shame
• Fear of disconnection
•“I’m not worthy”
• Not the same thing as
guilt
• If you really knew what I
was like, you wouldn’t want
to connect with me, so I
mustn’t let you find out
Vulnerability
• We need to be
vulnerable to be
authentic
• But it’s risky- you can,
and will, be rejected
Vulnerability
Shame
Connection
Authenticity
•What is the relationship between shame and vulnerability?
•Between vulnerability and authenticity?
•Between authenticity and connection?
Numbing
WholeHearted
• The people who are most
able to be vulnerable and
hence authentic, and thus
most able to connect have
one thing in common
• They believe that they are
worthy of love and belonging
What Does It Take To Be
Wholehearted?
• Courage
• Compassion
–To self
–To others
• Connection
– Authenticity
– Vulnerability
• Spirituality
Spirituality
“Spirituality is recognising and celebrating
the fact that we are all inextricably
connected to each other by a power greater
than all of us, and that our connection to that
power and to one another is grounded in
love and compassion. Practicing spirituality
brings a sense of perspective, meaning, and
purpose to our lives.” The Gifts of
Imperfection Brené Brown
The Woman at the Well
So he came to a Samaritan city called Sychar, near the plot of ground that
Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired out
by his journey, was sitting by the well. It was about noon.
A Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, ‘Give me a
drink’…. The Samaritan woman said to him, ‘How is it that you, a Jew, ask a
drink of me, a woman of Samaria?’
Jesus answered her, ‘If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to
you, “Give me a drink”, you would have asked him, and he would have given
you living water.’
The woman said to him, ‘Sir, you have no bucket, and the well is deep. Where
do you get that living water? Are you greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave
us the well, and with his sons and his flocks drank from it?’
Jesus said to her, ‘Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but
those who drink of the water that I will give them will never be thirsty. The water
that I will give will become in them a spring of water gushing up to eternal life.’
The woman said to him, ‘Sir, give me this water, so that I may never be thirsty or
have to keep coming here to draw water.
Theological Reflection
• “We love because he first loved us.” –
1 John 4:18
• Our sense of worthiness comes from
God’s action: we know that we aren’t,
in point of fact, always very worthy,
(i.e. there is such a thing as sin) but
that God’s prior action recognises and
names us as loved, and hence lovable,
and hence worthy of love.
•God sees what is, not what is not.
Limitation of Brown’s Idea
• She doesn’t make much
allowance for sin in this –
especially the deliberate aspect
of it.
•
Wholehearted - Cafechurch Thinks About Brene Brown

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Wholehearted - Cafechurch Thinks About Brene Brown

  • 2. Contextualising for Caféchurch If we are distinguishing between fide (heart based, trust, faith) and assensus (head based, belief, assent), this fits mainly (but not entirely) within fide
  • 3. The Price We Pay for Modernity
  • 4. Numb • It turns out that you can’t only numb some of your emotions • If you numb the bad stuff, you numb the good stuff as well.
  • 5. Connection • Our basic desire - “what we are here for”
  • 6. Authenticity • To connect with people, we need to be authentic – (only?) the real me connects with the real you
  • 7. Shame • Fear of disconnection •“I’m not worthy” • Not the same thing as guilt • If you really knew what I was like, you wouldn’t want to connect with me, so I mustn’t let you find out
  • 8. Vulnerability • We need to be vulnerable to be authentic • But it’s risky- you can, and will, be rejected
  • 9. Vulnerability Shame Connection Authenticity •What is the relationship between shame and vulnerability? •Between vulnerability and authenticity? •Between authenticity and connection? Numbing
  • 10. WholeHearted • The people who are most able to be vulnerable and hence authentic, and thus most able to connect have one thing in common • They believe that they are worthy of love and belonging
  • 11. What Does It Take To Be Wholehearted? • Courage • Compassion –To self –To others • Connection – Authenticity – Vulnerability • Spirituality
  • 12. Spirituality “Spirituality is recognising and celebrating the fact that we are all inextricably connected to each other by a power greater than all of us, and that our connection to that power and to one another is grounded in love and compassion. Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning, and purpose to our lives.” The Gifts of Imperfection Brené Brown
  • 13. The Woman at the Well So he came to a Samaritan city called Sychar, near the plot of ground that Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired out by his journey, was sitting by the well. It was about noon. A Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, ‘Give me a drink’…. The Samaritan woman said to him, ‘How is it that you, a Jew, ask a drink of me, a woman of Samaria?’ Jesus answered her, ‘If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, “Give me a drink”, you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.’ The woman said to him, ‘Sir, you have no bucket, and the well is deep. Where do you get that living water? Are you greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave us the well, and with his sons and his flocks drank from it?’ Jesus said to her, ‘Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but those who drink of the water that I will give them will never be thirsty. The water that I will give will become in them a spring of water gushing up to eternal life.’ The woman said to him, ‘Sir, give me this water, so that I may never be thirsty or have to keep coming here to draw water.
  • 14. Theological Reflection • “We love because he first loved us.” – 1 John 4:18 • Our sense of worthiness comes from God’s action: we know that we aren’t, in point of fact, always very worthy, (i.e. there is such a thing as sin) but that God’s prior action recognises and names us as loved, and hence lovable, and hence worthy of love. •God sees what is, not what is not.
  • 15. Limitation of Brown’s Idea • She doesn’t make much allowance for sin in this – especially the deliberate aspect of it. •