1. CHAPTER 2.1

2. DAKOTA –6 MONTHS LATER I really didn’t want to leave but I had to. I mean, I left before but this time I wasn’t coming back. I have no idea what my uncle got me into but ever since our little trip things have started to spiral out of control for me. If I stay I’ll probably become a liability to Enrique and the boy, Salem.

3. I decided that I would leave by night, while everyone was sleeping so I wouldn’t have to say goodbye, but of course I couldn’t get past Gooper. He is as much family as Enrique, like a faithful little brother, I wish I could take him with me but the risk of putting him in danger is too great.

4. SALEM I just don’t know about this dog, he’s more human than animal. I didn’t think anything was up when I crawled out of my tent to feed Gooper and Neek but one look at the dog and his sad little face made me wonder what his problem could be.

5. Then I realized what his problem was, Dakota was nowhere to be found. I thought nothing of it at first, he always goes jogging or hiking in the morning…but he always carries the dogs with him. But then he wasn’t the same since we went to Twikkii Island. Finally, it was lunch time and I didn’t see him so I went to Enrique. For one thing Dakota was the best cook of us all and it was his turn for kitchen duty, on the other hand, something terrible could have happened to him.

6. “I can’t find Dakota.” I announced, eyes searching the man’s cool face. Enrique is strange sometimes he’s so happy the sun seems to shine from within him, other times he just…disconnected. “Dakota’s not here.” He said without emotion. “He left before the sun this morning.” “He’s gone?” I repeated disbelievingly, “What do you mean he’s gone? How can you be so calm about this?” Enrique shrugged, “This isn’t the first time Dakota’s done this. The boy’s troubled. The only thing we can do is wait and see if he comes back this time.” Somehow, I just knew Dakota wasn’t coming back.

7. I couldn’t believe that Dakota went away without me, he’s been like a big brother to me ever since I was dropped into this bizarre family of people and dogs. When night fell I took Gooper and went to look for him, I knew I wouldn’t find him but I was in denial, I didn’t want to be left alone with Enrique and his mood swings.

8. Somewhere along that walk I found myself in a strange meadow with even stranger people. One was an old woman who brought a strong sense of calm around me, another was a young woman who seemed to be able to see into my soul.

9. These two women told me stories, stories I would never be able to dream up in this lifetime. Stories of magical places, of fierce battles and of things yet to come. If I wasn’t so mellow I would have sworn that I was loosing my mind.

10. The older woman was my favorite, she was like the grandmother I never had. She told me the wildest stories, ones that would take hours to complete but always left me wanting more. And then when the sun came up, she would run her fingers through my hair and hum until I fell asleep. I always woke up inside my tent, but I always knew that I hadn’t dreamt the happenings of the night before.

11. DAKOTA – 1 YEAR LATER It was just another sunny day in the forest, every day was another sunny day in the forest. Things had become a bit boring, I would wake up with the sun and fill the dog bowls for the wolves that always visited, then I would go to the pond and fish from dawn till dusk, then I would carry my catch home where my wife would clean and cook them. I swear if I eat another fish I would grow a tail and gills!

12. Things did start to get a bit interesting when she got pregnant though, annoying, but interesting nonetheless. There were the cravings, the backaches, the swollen feet and of course the ever increasing size of her stomach. When she was about eight months gone, it was impossible for me to sleep in the tent, her stomach took half the space and I found myself being squashed between the cloth wall of the tent and my kicking unborn child. It was terrible! I may as well have carried the baby.

13. But when my son Angel was born, I realized that the nine months his mother nagged me was completely worth it. Cara says that he is the spitting image of me, and it’s only fair seeing what I went through. The first time I held the squirming baby I couldn’t help but wonder how my mother could possibly give me up. I figured that she probably didn’t want me from the beginning because the overwhelming love I felt for Angel was enough to prevent me from even considering doing such a thing.

14. As far as I’m concerned though, it’s her loss. I wouldn’t pass up the feedings, the dirty diapers and the being puked on for anything in the world. It was just amazing to watch Lil Man grow and learn, to see him go from defenseless infant to cooing baby, to having to chase after him when he learnt to creep and walk. How could my mother possibly give up hearing me say my very first word and being able to play with me? Never in my life did my uncle mean so much to me, never before did I ever think of him as more than Enrique the Tyrant. For the first time in more than a year I dug up my cell phone and gave my uncle a call, told him what was going on in my life. I nearly told him how much I loved him but because I’m not the sentimental type, I didn’t but instead thanked him for being both a father and mother to me.

15. ALBERT’S HOUSE

16. HAILEY: Woo! Wow, that burger didn’t waste any time going through me…

17. I have no idea what the point of this picture is…I know there is a reason I took it but…I can’t for the life of me remember what it is!

18. HAILEY: Ooo the pain! Albert! I think I need some Malox…don’t we have some Pepto in the fridge? Albert! I think I’m dying!

19. HAILEY: Oh…you’re not a gas bubble…Albert! I just had a baby! Where the heck is that man? Albert! I said I had a baby!

20. ALBERT: What? Oh…is that a baby? HAILEY: Yeah, hold it…I think I still need some Gasex

21. HAILEY: Hey! You’re not a gas bubble either. Albert! Call the doctor, I’m farting babies!

22. ALBERT: Hello Dr. McGee, yes, my wife farted two babies…I have no idea! I thought babies came from the cabbage patch…no, we don’t have a cabbage patch. Then where do they come from……………….Ohhhhhhh……

23. Anyways, the little farts are called Fyre (the one in the nanny’s hands with Albert’s eyes and Hailey’s skin) and Iyce (the one Hailey’s holding with blue eyes—that Hailey has to explain—and Albert’s skin tone).

24. I swear, Hailey is going down in Legacy history as the amazing baby farting mother. Look at her playing chess…just look at her! I have got to change those PJs.

25. Iyce gets the blue room which is the main nursery, I’m moving her sister into the smaller yellow room…they look nothing alike and I get them mixed up! Heaven help!

26. Oh…look at that. Apparently Fyre has her mother’s eyes…whoops my bad. I could have sworn that she had Albert’s eyes.

27. Hailey taught Fyre to talk in Icye’s room…Fyre’s room has the same toys and everything, why can’t you people put the kids in their own rooms! Do you think building a house is easy? You try putting up walls and matching paint with flooring and don’t get me started on furniture! HAILEY: Pixx! Chill, why are you getting so worked up?

28. Albert taught Iyce to walk in Fyre’s room. It’s as simple as matching the name with the color people!

29. To please me they started teaching the girls in the hallway. Iyce was taught to speak on the potty (nah!), she demanded a bottle immediately.

30. Fyre was taught to walk in the living room by her mother who is still dressed in her vacation clothes. Somebody really needs to go shopping!

31. Cute huggle picture with bonus stink cloud… 

32. Poor Albert gets left alone with his screaming toddler daughters. EAxis should have really made it possible to bathe both twins at the same time because this is ridiculous and poor Albert is exhausted. ALBERT: You have no idea!

33. ALBERT: When the girls get older we are so taking another vacation. HAILEY: *positive interaction* Here’s the funny thing about these two, they are married with twins and have zero bolts for each other. Oh, now I remember what that picture was about, the dude that Albert was talking to, Hailey has two bolts for him!

34. Hailey was demoted…again…I suck at chance cards!

35. And now it’s birthday time! No cakes though. Fyrepoofs into a Fiona look-alike. I’ve got to change one of their hairs…or not.

36. Oh barf! Iycepoofs into a kid with Sabrina’s hair…to the mirror with you!

37. Much better!

38. Iyce’s outfit is tacky as hell! But I like it for some reason. Sitting right behind her is Fyre and beside Fyre is Fiona.

39. Hailey was rolling wants for her girls to get into private school. They didn’t and I think this is the reason why. Poor Hailey went into aspiration failure as soon as the head master left.

40. Albert helps Iyce with homework…

41. Then he helps Fyre…where the devil is Hailey. She’s as bad a mother as Marylena.

42. Everyone in the house had a want to adopt a pet so they adopted Yuko. I think this one is Yuko… Note: Enrique’s dog Neek gave birth to 4 puppies, Gooper, Muffin, Yuko and I can’t remember the other one’s name so somehow…I kinda named two puppies Yuko when they were adopted.

43. LEGACY HOUSE

44. Well, I’m giving these kids a Shrek theme, so because his sister is Fiona, meet baby Shrek! Naaaaahhhh! I’m just playing, this is Charming. I was gonna name him Puss because the cat has a sexy accent, and I was gonna name him Donkey because that’s the funniest character, but I decided to name him Charming at the last second because he’s the dumbest villain around…uh… 

45. FIONA: I’m the princess! I’m the princess! I’m the princess! No, you’re a little fart like your cousins.

46. I LOVE this picture, for no reason at all…It speaks to me, it says….ART!

47. Marylena invites herself over and gets right to playing with her grandson. If only she could’ve tended to her own children that way. Marylena, you keep on sucking girl!

48. She’s in love with her only grandson, probably because he reminds her so much of Lucus…*sniff, sniff* Lucus…

49. In other news Fiona’s father taught her to study. So Ethan wins the Fiona Race. ETHAN: The Fiona Race? Really Pixx? You’re loosing your touch.

50. MARYLENA: You two are married. FAIR: Yeah Mom, I know. MARYLENA: I know that you know, I’m disappointed. ETHAN: I thought you liked me. MARYLENA: And I thought there were voices in my head.

51. The parents got a couple promotions so I built Fiona her own room, there’s a bed in here somewhere but the angle is just bad so…yeah…

52. ETHAN: Eek! Marylena, what are you doing? MARYLENA: Now I rrrrrreeeaallllllyyy, don’t know why my daughter married you…

53. Ethan shows off his flexible fathering skills, he’s able to split his love between his son and daughter. Woot! Go Ethan!

54. Fiona is a little sweetheart, she helps out around the house by making the bed, washing the dishes, cleaning the toilet and collecting the groceries. I LOVE HER!

55. She invites Fyre over all the time. FIONA: Because we’re twin cousins. I think me and Icye were switched at birth. Yeah, especially since you’re older than the twins. You’re such a smart little girl Fee-Fee…

56. Look it’s Fair, hey Fair, I haven’t seen you in a few slides. What’chadoin’? FAIR: What do you think I’m doing? One of my kids is going to be a teen soon and I’ll have to pass my skills onto whichever one of them is the heir.

57. Fair casts a spell! This is like her first spell! I’m so proud!

58. This is Invictus, Fair’s familiar. I dub him Vic. VIC: Why is the baby on the floor? Good question.

59. LOL. Somebody clogged the toilet and the Tidy Bopper sucked up too much water so it went crazy and started spitting trash all over the place.

60. Fair tried to use magic to clean up the trash but it only cleaned the toilet and the shower, so I had her fix the Tidy Bopper who sucked up what it let out. Should have just kept it in there in the first place T.B….Yeah, I’m not calling it TB for short.

61. After the whole Tidy Bopper drama, Ethan decided to rip Fiona’s arms off. These two are so cute. This entire family is cute!

62. Invictus is spoiled. When they’re not playing with the baby they’re playing with him. VIC: Ooooohhhh yeah baby! This is the life!

63. Charming poofed into an Ethan look alike with Fair’s eyes and skin.

64. Let the baby training begin!

65. Okay, maybe I was wrong about Ethan, he spends all his spare time with Fiona. She’s not the baby!

66. Fair taught Charming how to speak.

67. …One of the most convenient reasons for having pet beds, tired tots crawl right up on them and take a nap.

68. …Lets see what do we have here…spoiled little girl on bed along with spoiled cat while tot sleeps on pet bed and father watches…

69. It looks like Fair is stuck raising her son because his father is attached to his sister by the hips!

70. The wayward father finally mans up and teaches his son to walk.

71. While Albert sleeps Fair bonds with her kids. She’s reading to Fiona while Charming plays all by his lonesome.

72. CHARMING: Hee, hee, woof doggy!

73. I just realized that Invictus disappeared, Charming insists on sleeping on the cat bed. You’re a human kid!

74. FIONA: Daddy! I’ve never seen a spoiled sim kid before…this is so amazing!

75. Ethan taught Charming how to use his potty.

76. And good thing too because the next day Charming poofed into a mini Ethan with Salem’s hair that I may or may not change.

77. Because the Spelmans don’t have enough money to build a room for Charming, he’ll have to sleep in a corner of his sister’s room…Now that I think about it, I may change the rules a bit to make this legacy patriarchal.

78. They adopted a dog because the princess wanted one. This is not Yuko, I’m gonna have to rename this puppy. Yeah, I’m totally making this legacy patriarchal, in the event that the heir does not have a son then the next person in line will become heir and the former heir will have to skedaddle.

79. MARYLENA & SABRINA

80. Sabrina went into town and got a makeover, this is the final product.

81. She moved into Faridae’s and Ethan’s old bedroom.

82. Cute picture of Muffin!!!

83. Muffin is totally the baby of this household, Marylena dotes on her as much as Ethan dotes of Fiona.

84. Sabrina finds love with Dustin Broke, they’ve got like two bolts for each other.

85. You may think that this is a picture of Albert visiting his mother but it’s not. It is in fact a picture of the wonders of dog pee in the Sims 2 games. Muffin’s pee was miraculous enough to make weeds grow.

86. Ewwww! Icky pimple photo…uh…Sabrina….? SABRINA: Yes master…I shall do your bidding…

87. END