This past weekend I had the honor to officiate the wedding of a longtime friend, Carole Moore, who directed the Children’s Choir at our parish of St. Paul Church in Princeton for over 30 years. Having lost her husband and my dear friend to cancer some 10 years ago – it was one of the first funerals I served as a Deacon. Allowing God to open her eyes, Carole met a wonderful man, John Wagner, whose 40 year marriage ended with the death of his wife from cancer a few years ago. With a combined 65 years of marriage to their former spouses, they came to this new union as people who have learned that marriage requires you to bear all things, believe all things, hope all things and endure all things in good times and bad…and certainly in sickness and in health. Their earlier marriages gave them knowledge and insight as well as a broken and mended heart. So walking alongside John and Carole this past year has been a blessing for me as I have had a front seat to witnessing their “seasoned love.” So let me tell you a bit of what that looks like…

1. Homily for the Wedding of Carole Moore and John Wagner
Princeton University Chapel – 19 October 2019
Deacon Jim Knipper
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pg. 1
We gather this afternoon in this beautiful chapel as two families – along with their friends and relatives come
together to witness, support and to celebrate the love and commitment of Carole and John. At St. Paul
Church I have the opportunity to work with many couples in their sacramental marriage preparation – most
of whom are in their 20’s and 30’s, marrying for the first time. So walking alongside John and Carole this
past year has been a blessing for me as I have had a front seat to witnessing their “seasoned love.” So let
me tell you a bit of what that looks like…
For as most of you know, both John and Carole enjoyed a combined 65 years of marriage to their former
spouses. And so they come here today having experienced what a strong marriage means…where one
learns to bear all things, believe all things, hope all things and endure all things in good times and bad…and
certainly in sickness and in health. Their earlier marriages gave them knowledge and insight as well as a
broken and mended heart…all of which instilled in them a matured insight on what to seek when the time
came to find a new partner to enjoy the rest of their lives with.
When my wife Teresa and I met with John and Carole, together for the first time, they were quick to tell us
the story of their first encounter and that first spark. Like many couples, they met online which led to their
first date in downtown Princeton. John had already grabbed an outside table on a perfect evening. As you
know - neither of them are at ever being at a loss of words – so it did not take long before they quickly
shared their life experiences, including walking the final journey with their respective spouses. They spoke
about their love for their families and spoke about their mutual love for music and singing.
And then the conversation moved towards talking about God. Now by this time in the conversation Carole
knows that John earned a double major in Civil Engineering and Religious studies – so she likely had no
idea where the talk of God would go! But when they took turns describing to each other what God was to
them personally…they quickly found common ground that God is pure unconditional love…and that any and
all relationships must be rooted in this divine love.
Well, soon the dinner arrived and John reached over and took Carole’s hand and asked her if they could
pray together. And it was in John’s heartfelt prayer, that he asked God to help them see each other through
God’s eyes. And in that moment the flood gates of God’s love was opened thereby allowing it to pour
through them, with them and in them. On their first date they took part in what we are all called to do:
facilitating Divine Flow.
We see this action echoed in the Gospel that John and Carole chose for today – reminding us that we are
called to love God and each other with all of our heart, mind and soul. Christ made it clear that we need to
get our heads out of the sense of membership and what is owed to me if I follow just the laws – and to get
into discipleship and thus right relationship with God and with others.
In essence to see God as one who gives life versus one who gives law…of one who gives love versus one
who makes us earn love…one who gives compassion versus one who judges – A God who encourages us
to change…to grow…and to love God and love each other. And the part many find so hard to believe is that
this Divine Flow of love does not exclude others because of race, creed, color, sexuality, religious beliefs or
any other identifier we, or any of our respective Churches, want to use to reject others. It is a love that does
not judge, but accepts the other person as they are because we are all created in God’s image.

2. Homily for the Wedding of Carole Moore and John Wagner
Princeton University Chapel – 19 October 2019
Deacon Jim Knipper
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pg. 2
In his book, Divine Dance, Franciscan Fr. Richard Rohr writes:
“This is the great surprise, and for some a disappointment: The Divine Flow doesn’t have to do with you
being perfect, belonging to the right group, or even understanding the Flow. Jesus never has any such
checklist test before he heals someone. There’s no doctrinal or moral test whatsoever. Jesus doesn’t check
if the people he heals are Jewish, baptized, or in their first or second marriage. He just says, as it were, “Are
you going to walk towards me and allow yourself to be touched…allow yourself to be loved?”
This type of love is called Agape – a love that originates from God and flows through us onto others. For
we are all called to be both conduits and recipients. This is the type of love that we hear St. Paul writing to
the people of Corinth about. Paul had set up a church there only to find out soon after he left, that the
people had already forgotten what he taught them. So Paul sent them a letter instructing them how to live
and love together as a community…of how to allow the Light of Christ to shine through the grace-filled
cracks of our imperfect selves – and to be open to accept the mantle of Christ filled with the gifts of
patience, compassion, kindness and gentleness.
Our love for John and Carole is why we have gathered here today, from all different faiths and walks of
life…to simply take the first of many steps with them as they begin this incredible journey of sacramental
marriage. At St. Paul Church, where Carole and I and many others who are here partake of communion
and community…we have been blessed for the past 20 years to have Gospel-centric leadership, rooted in
love for others, from our past and current pastors who are with us today: Msgr Nolan and Msgr Joe.
And it was Msgr Nolan who would often remind us from the pulpit - that a friend and a lover is one who
knows the tune in your heart and soul and will sing it back to you if you should ever forget the melody.
Well…just spend a bit of time with Carole and John and there is no doubt that they carry that tune with them
every day – and are never ashamed to sing it out loud. But we as a community of believers and lovers and
supporters of this couple, always have be ready to add our voices in harmony, urging this couple to never
stop singing that song to each other...for this is what the bonds and blessings of marriage call each of us to.
In closing, it was St. Ignatius of Loyola who once said, “It should constantly be our care to see God’s
presence in everything”. John and Carole, there is no doubt that we can all see God’s presence here today
in the love you have for each other… and know that our prayer for you today is that the blessing of God’s
presence be with you all the days of your life and that the peace and love of God always live in your hearts,
and be sung from your lips. Know that we love you both very much…we wish you well…very well…always
and forever in your life together – but especially on this day, through this sacred covenant, in this holy
sacrament, that you are now about to administer to each other.