1. Wellnessseeker Presents:
Break Free from
Emotional
Eating
In Six Steps

2. 1.
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11.
Introduction
Emotions & Food
Emotional Eating Explained
Emotional Eating Test
Emotional Eating
Emotional Patterns
Emotional Mastery
Emotional Management
Breaking Free
Conclusion
Thank you!
Table of Contents

3. I've been there! Many many times!
...IT STARTS over a weekend, with the view to launch on Monday morning. I have
spent most of Saturday afternoon researching online, listening and reading the
amazing testimonials. This is the holy grail of diets for sure...
Until the weekend arrives and I eat to celebrate.
Until the credit card bill comes in and I eat to forget.
Until work is so mundane that I eat to lift the boredom.
Until I'm so stressed from the demands of motherhood that I eat to escape.
Introduction

4. All this eating would take me to a place I hated, somewhere in the dark corner of
my mind and there I would feel disgusted with myself and my lack of self control.
I would call myself the most horrible names and then eat to forget.
Until that special night out on the town, with my girlfriends, looms near - and I'm
caught in a cycle of panic about how much weight I've actually gained and what
to do now to get rid of it. Before I know it, I'm back on the dieting trail and
determined, so determined to lose the weight - this time!!
UNTIL, UNTIL, UNTIL...
This was my pattern for years. It describes my battle with food, diets and the low
self-esteem that gripped me when the diets inevitably failed.
To be honest, this only scratches the surface of what I actually felt about myself
when I failed and the struggle I had with the negative voice in my head that
always followed.
I am qualified as a Person Centered Counselor and have been in practice for
many years, helping numerous people live their best lives. I should know better,
shouldn't I? This was one area of my life that I just couldn’t seem to get a handle
on. Over the years I had developed a repetitive pattern of behaviour around
emotional eating and I suffered hundreds of failures with diets and losing weight.
Change Came in Disguise
I was working on a programme of change for my clients through the Tony Robins
Breakthrough Programme over a year ago. I found the philosophy involved
incredibly insightful and clear. I was able to combine my expertise in emotional
mastery with my new breakthrough training and develop this programme called:
Break Free From Emotional Eating
in six steps...

5. Instructions
There are six pieces to solving the puzzle; six steps to understanding and
overcoming your emotional eating and end your dieting days forever. Follow
these steps and you will set yourself free from the torture of emotional eating,
yo-yo dieting and poor self esteem. These six steps are:
1. Understanding how emotions and food are connected.
2. Testing yourself - are you an emotional eater?
3. Understanding your emotional patterns.
4. Learn to master your emotions and develop new patterns.
5. Learn to manage and soothe your emotions internally.
6. Implementing change: develop and practice the new patterns/habits until
they are second nature to you.
THIS BOOK IS MY GIFT TO YOU

6. Step One: Understanding the importance of emotions and their connection
to food.
Everything we humans do in life is driven by our emotions. Every action we take
is conceptualized in thought and motivated by feeling. In short, it is our
feelings that dictate our behaviour.
Our culture teaches us to manage our thoughts, think positively, and repeat
good affirmations. Great advice there’s no doubt, but it’s our EMOTIONS that
are the real driver and understanding these emotions and their impact on our
lives, is key to our FREEDOM. And indeed the key to unlocking yourself from
emotional eating.
Emotions & Food

7. If we feel good about a certain action we will move toward it quite naturally,
without any force. For example, an invite to the party of the year arrives. You are
filled with excitement and anticipation and you move with ease toward planning
the outfit and the travel arrangements. It’s an enjoyable and positive process.
Life is easy and free flowing when our feelings are positive. Why? Because
positive feelings automatically create effortless action. It's human nature -
energy goes where emotions flow...
Now let’s look at a negative emotion. This invitation to the party arrives and
instantly you're filled with dread. You've gained weight again, nothing from your
wardrobe fits you and you can't afford a new outfit nor do you want to go up
another size - again! But it's really important that you attend this party anyway.
What happens - you feel terrible about yourself and are filled with dread (a real
negative emotion). An emotional tug of war starts and the results are feelings of
resistance and discomfort. Your mind is trying to find ways in which you can
wriggle out of going to the party and without losing face. Resistance will prevail
until the event is over and the pain is eased.
My personal experience has taught me that it is our negative feelings that
we try to avoid no matter the cost. It is not the situation or even the
thoughts of the situation that have the negative impact – it’s the feelings that
the thoughts create, that we avoid at every turn.
When we are in emotional pain and we are struggling to move past this pain, we
tend to self soothe or quick fix it, using a variety of tricks. Food and drink are the
usual pacifiers to pain, with millions all over our world comfort eating in times of
emotional discomfort.
So what is it about food and drink that soothes us?
Our favorite foods taste fabulous - we love them. However, it's not only the taste
of food that brings pleasure but the conversation about food too, the
anticipation...

8. The scrumptious association of food with good times and delight is peppered all
over our daily conversations with family and friends. We talk non stop about
food; cook books are hot off the book shelves; Facebook is falling down with
pages on quick recipes using only video and pictures to instruct, and boy do they
make you feel good...
ALSO it's the dinner parties; it's the meals in our newest restaurants in town with
our girlfriends and on it goes...
Food gives us reason for love and connection again and again and further
heightens the feel-good factor in us, in relation to food.
When you understand the immense power of our connections with food it is
much easier to see clearly why, when we are feeling bad or on a low ebb, we
choose food and those negative feelings move on.
Look at the sheer mounds and varieties of foods in our supermarkets and the
accessibility of it - it is so easy to see why it is the drug of choice.
But why are we craving and lusting over carbs, chocolate and fatty foods? Why

9. can't we lust for kale and carrots?
LET ME EXPLAIN: Your body, like your brain, is a smart piece of kit. Flavour is
only part of the reason you crave these foods. Your brain chemistry actually
changes when you eat the bag of chips or the cream cake. "Carbohydrates set
off a series of chemical reactions that ultimately lead to a boost in brain
serotonin" says Judith Wurtman, Ph.D., the former Director of the Research
Program in Women’s Health at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology,
Clinical Research Center. Therefore, the higher the levels of serotonin, the more
content you feel (at least temporarily).
Once we engage in eating behaviour that rewards us emotionally, we develop a
cognitive, emotional and behavioural pattern. This simply means that you
become hard wired to reach for the chocolate and the chips and the cream cake.
Your brain links the food with the feelings and records it and repeats it in
lightening speed when triggered by your difficult emotions.
When you understand the effect certain foods have chemically in our bodies and
in our minds then you'll see clearly how we use food to soothe difficult feelings
and why we get locked into a pattern of emotional eating behaviour - and we
aren't even aware that we are in this cycle.
However, the emotional pain that we started with, is still very much inside of us,
still unhealed and unacknowledged. LET US HEAL IT!

10. Step 2: Are you an emotional eater?
THERE is a huge difference between eating for pleasure and emotional eating.
Eating is a primal instinct. We must eat to survive and when we are really hungry,
eating is incredibly pleasurable; it's natures way. The bliss of satisfying a hunger;
the delight of good tasting food.
However, there is a difference between eating because we are hungry and
eating to alter a mood or create a feeling.
Let's be clear: Emotional Eating is when we use food to change our feelings from
bad to good, to soothe ourselves. Moving momentarily to a place of instant
gratification or false contentment. In short, eating to change our feelings is
emotional eating or eating your feelings.
Emotional Eating Explained

11. To identify whether you are emotional
eating, ask yourself the following
questions:
Do you eat when you’re not hungry or when you’re full up?
Do you eat to feel better?
Do you eat to soothe yourself or to move a negative feeling
out of your way?
Do you eat when you're bored?
Do you eat for excitement and variety?
Do you eat to feel secure and content?
Do you experience a sense of relief while eating?
Do you eat to relax?
Do you continue to eat even when full - until a certain
feeling is obtained?
Do you eat or reach for food straight after a stressful event?
Emotional Eating Test

12. Have you answered yes to any of the questions above? If you have then there's no doubt
that you are emotionally eating - it may be some of the time or a lot of the time...
It is so important to remember the following:
REAL HUNGER comes on a personGRADUALLY, and will be satisfied by a variety of
foods of your choice.
EMOTIONAL HUNGER comes on SUDDENLY, is usually accompanied by cravings for
specific high calorie foods and will not be satisfied with anything else. Have you ever
longed for your guilty pleasure - be it chocolate cake, chocolate chip ice cream,
doughnuts or chips and no other food would satisfy that longing? It is so important
when this longing comes on, to pause and ask yourself - am I hungry? Or am I searching
for a certain feeling?
Emotional Eating

13. Step 3: Getting to know 'you'
Ok, you should now be able to identify if you are using food to change your
emotional state. You will probably have some idea of the eating behavior that
you engage in.
What do you do now?
The task is to understand what emotions and events are driving this eating
behaviour. In order to do this It is essential that you understand your internal
world of emotional patterns and triggers.
As human beings, we all have a natural reaction to emotional pain and that is to
move away from it and fast... In fact it is so fast that you don’t even recognise
you are doing it.
Emotional Patterns

14. Our brains jump into action to protect us by employing our defence system. The
main job of the defence system is to keep us safe from pain, ie difficult feelings.
However sometimes this can work against us, when it is necessary to look at the
pain straight on, in order to heal those difficult and destructive emotions.
Below are some of the usual defence mechanisms that we employ when we are
dealing with challenging feelings or situations:
Defend or attack: Do you get defensive and blame others, attack verbally or
emotionally?
Finding the positive: Do you look for the positive immediately? Seek out the
silver lining? Do you get emotional leverage from this and move on?
Playing small: Do you feel sorry for yourself and look for help beyond
yourself? Do you play the victim telling everyone about your hard life and
poor circumstances?
Blaming yourself: Do you blame yourself - saying 'oh if only I could be
stronger, more disciplined'.
Rationalise: Do you make the problem easier by understanding it in relation
to others and the 'norm' or specific stories.
Do any, or all of the above apply to you?
Are you able to recognise the defences you employ? This is really important for
you to understand so you will see clearly what those defences are, and push past
them.
Why? When a feeling isn't fully understood or processed it often returns again
and again. It is imperative then to see past your defences and allow this difficult
feeling in, so you can process it once and for all.
If we allow our defences to keep the feeling away we can get stuck in a minefield
of blame and attack (or any of the other defence mechanisms alluded to) for
weeks, months or even years. When we are stuck in this place we often use food
to soothe ourselves.
Taking ownership of our feelings is the first vital step to managing our emotions.

15. Identifying your difficult feelings:
When we are trying to understand ourselves it is essential to pay attention to our
'triggers'. They show themselves in certain situations - usually scary or stressful
predicaments. FOR example say you, like the majority of the population, are
terrified of public speaking. Any time you stand up to speak, in front of even a
few people, your voice shakes, your heart thumps hard and you don't deliver...
The situation here that triggers you is 'public speaking' so generally you will
avoid this difficulty as best you can.
There are many situations that set off our triggers. It could be the noise of the
kids, a messy house, your bossy manager, the bills arriving. Whatever it is, get to
know the cause of your 'triggers'. Knowing the root of the problem is the first
step to fixing it.
Let's take this one step further. What are the feelings driving the triggers?
Reflect on this because Identifying the associated 'feelings' is crucial to
controlling them thus empowering you to direct your life and unhinge those one
off triggers or situations for once and for all.

16. In the public speaking example above we could say that the underlying 'feeling'
driving the 'panic' experienced, was one of 'self doubt' and/or 'fear of
judgement' from the audience. No matter what the related 'feelings' are - they
will show up and hinder you every time until you acknowledge and rescue them
thus giving you back control of your life.
What particular feelings do you have, that you don't like?Add to the list below as
you see fit.
Fear - Anxiety - Uncertainty
Sadness - Depression - Unhappiness
Angry - Annoyance - Fury
Now ask yourself - do I feed any of these feelings?
You may not have the answers now but I encourage you to reflect over the
coming days and make a note when you find yourself avoiding or skipping
over certain feelings.

17. Step 4: Learning to let the hurt and pain in.
OK, so you are probably saying at this stage, that you know why emotions and
food are connected. Which feelings you hate and you are now aware of which
feelings you are feeding...
NOW WHAT? How do I stop eating my feelings?
The human condition is to feel, there is no getting away from this fact. Everyday
brings with it moments (or hours) of feeling bad, tired, down, hurt, upset; right?
Why do we feel these negative emotions?
Your emotions are your guide. They are your internal signposts and they are
stimulating you for a very good reason. They want you to listen, to stop and let
them in.
Emotional Mastery

18. When we feel the bad ones coming on, we usually turn away from them. We
obstruct them using consumption of some sort; in this case food.
"The main affliction of our modern civilization is that we don’t know how
to handle the suffering inside us and we try to cover it up with all kinds of
consumption". Thich Nhat Hanh"
If you can learn to heed your emotions as a signal that something needs your
attention, you will build up a confidence that will allow you to attend to your
feelings quickly.
The word emotion is self explanatory - coming from the Latin root 'emovere' - 'e'
meaning 'out' and 'motion' meaning 'to move'. This suggests then, that an
'emotion' must be fully felt, if it is to 'move out' and 'away'.
In short a feeling must be accepted into our bodies, felt, acknowledged, allowed
to rise inside us and it will then fall away.
You must get comfortable feeling uncomfortable!
There are no shortcuts, no easy way through. But don't panic... START with the
small emotions, the little daily irritants. For example: you are agitated and angry
at the behaviour of a work colleague or your friend. So what do you do to resolve
this issue? You must acknowledge that you are roused by the behavior, let the
feeling in, sit with it until you fully feel it, and it will fall away; dissolve.
You must repeat this practice at every opportunity so you become apt at
addressing your bad feelings. Allow them to wash in and become the observer of
your internal world. Your mind will try to rationalise and reason with the feelings
but if you can stay focused and set your mind aside for this period - you will be
one step closer to managing your emotions.
What we resist persists! Your feelings will ask to be heard first and then they
will demand it. Practice allowing them in, at the first instance or risk becoming
overwhelmed by the build up

19. Step 5: Heal Yourself! Learn to manage all of your emotions within...
The first step to 'soothing a feeling' is to understand how you respond to
yourself when those negative emotions take hold and you are having a bad day.
Stop and listen to how you speak to yourself, about yourself...
Are you harsh with yourself? Do you use phrases like “I am too emotional", or "I
am overreacting again", or “I can't handle anything"? Most of us beat ourselves
up on the inside and so we remain stuck there; damaged.
The Buddha said 'Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own
unguarded thoughts'.
Emotional Management

20. I urge you to take a few moments right now and reflect on your internal dialogue.
I cannot emphasis enough the importance of this reflection and the necessity of
practicing daily.
Become your own observer and make regular notes of the inner chatter.
Our internal dialogue is often set down in childhood. The way your caregivers
handled your emotions will have a huge bearing on how you manage them
today.
If we treat ourselves badly during a difficult time it actually heightens the struggle
that we are experiencing. This pushes us to soothe or fix these emotions as
quickly as possible with outside consumption and in this case it is 'food' - a fast,
accessible and acceptable 'fix'.
Ask yourself, - if someone was standing next to me and supplying the same
negative put downs and commentary to me about me, how would I feel?
I'm guessing you'd feel hurt and offended and you'd probably walk away.
So why do we allow ourselves to beat ourselves up on the inside?
Become your own best friend.
How do you treat your best friend (or someone who is very close to you) when
they are feeling down or dealing with something very difficult? Do you shout and
tell them how silly they are? Or do you say "It will be ok, it always works out, and
you know that I am here for you?"
The internal dialogue creates an inner emotional state. Speaking to yourself in a
soft and gentle way soothes your emotional wellbeing and helps you weather the
difficult feeling or situation.
When a negative feeling rises, learn to talk to yourself like you would your
best friend.
How? Practice soothing yourself with words that feel familiar to you. These words
should have emotional content or value to you. That means that you should feel
stirred emotionally by the words you choose.
Write your own script in words that are meaningful and emotive to you and
repeat it to yourself - like an affirmation.

21. Soothing Technique
There are many methods to soothing yourself and one of the easiest ways is to
visualize hugging yourself. If you can find a quiet and comfortable private place
all the better and if not, don't worry - just close your eyes and practice the
visualisation.
Use the script that you prepared and say it to yourself internally. If you are alone
you can say it aloud.
This may feel strange and awkward at first, or even very funny and your mind will
try to persuade you to stop. But remember there's tremendous healing in this
practice. Learning how to soothe a feeling takes regular practice and I encourage
you to make self-soothing a daily ritual and you will reap the benefits.
You will find that this self-soothing method will allow the emotions in and they
will rise and be processed and soothed. They will then fall away without a fight,
thus stopping the need for eating for comfort.

22. Step 6: Letting go of emotional eating by finding a positive alternative.
Ok, by now you hopefully know which feelings you want to process and be free
of. You have learnt to pacify these feelings and you are closer to managing your
emotions without food.
The next vital piece of the puzzle is to take control of the cognitive hard wiring;
the habitual behaviour.
Why? Because every behaviour that has been repeated and rewarded with
positive emotions, gets stuck in our brains and repeats itself as a habit. This has
got to be undone and replaced with a new pattern. Therefore if you have
developed a habit of feeding your emotions you must do the work to undo the
behaviour - there's no shortcuts.
Breaking Free

23. Did you know that is can take between 28 and 66 days to undo a habit?
In order to unhinge a habit, you have to complete a series of steps and repeat
over and over, until you have learned a new pattern. Just practice and fail,
practice and fail... until you get enough traction for it to stick.
The steps below will help you identify what needs changing and how to set up a
new habit.
1. Identify specifically what you want to change.
2. Link lots of pain to the old habit.
3. Find an alternative way to react to and replace the old pattern.
4. Practice and list the pleasures of being free of the burden of the old pattern.
5. Don't doubt your decision to change!
Below I have given you an explanation and example of each step.
1. What are your trigger feeling(s) or events?
What are the specific feelings or events that create emotional disturbance for
you?
Example: Sadness
What is your old pattern when dealing with this feeling?
How do you normally deal with this feeling or event?
Example: Move sadness on by creating happiness in eating …. Book a lovely
meal with your partner.
What pain does the old pattern give you?
This is a really important part of breaking the habit. List, in great detail, the pain
that the old pattern gives you.
Example: Using food as a source of happiness made you eat when you're not
hungry and gain weight, this in-turn made you feel terrible about yourself and
lowered your self esteem.

24. How can you internally soothe this feeling?
Set up a new script for how you can help yourself console this feeling.
Example: Visualise hugging yourself and repeating the affirmation - "It is ok,
sadness will pass, all is well, all manner of things are well".
What alternative pleasure can you set up as a way to move and deal with the
trigger feeling?
Remember the pleasure has to be equal or better than the food fix to replace
the habit.
Example: Set up a 'non food' related, happy thing to do - like geocaching,
outdoor adventures, going for a swim, or an hour with a good book etc...
Replacing a habit takes effort. Your job is to decide if you want the change more
that you want the food. If your need for change is great you will find yourself
moving to action swiftly. If not I suggest you take a look at how much you really
want to change your eating behaviour and tease it out, you won't regret it.
I was stuck where you are for years and years and I am free now. I promise you, if
I can do it, you can too.

25. You will know by now, through the information in this e-book that emotional
eating has very little to do with food and everything to do with emotions and
emotional mastery.
The steps to unlocking emotional eating are :
1. Understanding how emotions and food are connected.
2. Testing yourself - are you an emotional eater?
3. Understanding your emotional patterns.
4. Learn to master your emotions and develop new patterns.
5. Learn to manage and soothe your emotions internally.
6. Implementing change: develop and practice the new patterns/habits until
they are second nature to you.
One thing I know for sure is that, once you combine emotional intelligence and
emotional mastery you will free yourself from emotional eating. Following the six
steps will help you to do this. Releasing yourself from emotional eating allows
those extra pounds to dissolve with ease. No crazy diets, no expensive monthly
subscriptions, just real and lasting change.
This is my wish for YOU ...
With power and positivity
Shauna x
Conclusion

26. We at wellnessseeker want to take this opportunity to thank you all so much for
downloading and reading our book. We know your time is precious and we value
each and every moment you share with us.
This book has been written with the soul purpose of propelling you forward on
your wellness journey.
Our passion is your wellbeing
We hope that you have found it useful and will use it as an ongoing resource.
We want our material to be accessible to everyone so please feel free to share...
If you have any questions connect with me on Facebook
Shauna,
wellnessseeker Founder
This book has been edited by Jackie McLaughlin. Connect with her HERE
Thank you!
Wellnessseeker
Shauna Quigley