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Think Slow, Talk Fast: The Art and Science of Spontaneous Speech
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Track: General Session
Think Fast – Talk Slow
The Art and Science of
Spontaneous Speech
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Think Fast – Talk Slow
Colleen M. Niese
Principal
Marlyn Group, LLC
cniese@marlyngroupllc.com
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What’s Spontaneous Speech?
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Think Fast…Talk Slow
The Two Conversations
The Words We Use
Dealing With The
Disrupters
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Two Conversations Equation
Self Talk
Actual
Words
The
Outcome
WhatWeThink
and
HowWeFeel
TheActual
Words
WeUse
• MakeaDecision
• Influence
• Motivate
• Clarify
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Let’s Play a Word Game
Finished files are the re-
sult of years of scientif-
ic study combined with
the experience of many
years
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Drum roll please….
Finished files are the re-
sult of years of scientif-
ic study combined with
the experience of many
years
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Self Talk
What We Think
Right vs Effective
“Am I right?” vs
“Am I effective?”
Stop
Listen
Re-engage
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Self Talk
What We Think
Get comfortable with, “I don’t know.”
Questions you should know vs. those
you shouldn’t.
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Self Talk
Future Me
• I want to memorable.
• I want this over with.
• I want to be right.
Urban Meyer:
An Action
A Response
An Outcome
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The Vacation Game
Think about your favorite vacation.
Find someone(s) who you want to share
your vacation story. Decide the order.
Once you’ve paired up wait until you
receive your next set of instructions.
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The Vacation Game – Take 2!
Share with your partner your worst
vacation story.
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The Two Conversations
Self Talk
Actual
Words
The
Outcome
WhatWeThink
and
HowWeFeel
TheActual
Words
WeUse
• MakeaDecision
• Influence
• Motivate
• Clarify
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How We Feel
Confident
Disengaged
Clueless
Data/Emotion Balance
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Data/Emotion Balance
Do Your Homework
Talk To Others
Bring Your Notes
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How We Feel
What do you fear
the most?
Terrorist Attack
Identify Fraud
Speaking in Public
Multiple surveys reveal
85% or higher become
anxious when asked to
speak spontaneously.
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Manage The Anxiety
Avoid, avoiding
Breathe
Pause
Refocus On Your
Objectives
Intent
Message
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Manage The Anxiety
Ask a question
Reminds you it’s a two way
dialogue
Involve others
Keeps them engaged
Takes the pressure
off of you
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The Two Conversations
Self Talk
Actual
Words
The
Outcome
WhatWeThink
and
HowWeFeel
TheActual
Words
WeUse
• MakeaDecision
• Influence
• Motivate
• Clarify
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Words We Use
Too Many
“I respectfully choose not to offer
an opinion at this time.”
“I don’t have anything to add.”
Tone
Volume
Speed
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Words We Use
Know Your Ticks
Broad vs. specific
A million times vs. twenty times
Everyone, no one, always, never
Filler Words
just, actually, obviously
Repeat Performance
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Opening Guts Check In
Move
On
Words We Use
Structure Drives Retention
40% better retention that’s more reliable
and accurate.
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Feedback
Solicit Feedback
Mentor
Coach
Peer
Team
Feedback Cycle
What worked, what didn’t &
why?
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Customer Service Exercise
Think about a time when you had an
unsuccessful experience with service
as a customer.
• Restaurant
• Retail
• Hotel
Jot down a few notes regarding your
experience.
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Customer Service Exercise
WATER THE FLOWERS
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The Disrupters
“I know.” Syndrome
Subject Changers
The Interrupters
Stop, listen,
continue
Ask for permission
Keep talking (be
careful)
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The Disrupters
Checked out
Ask questions in the moment
Ask for feedback after the meeting
Listener and/or peer (how to approach
the listener)
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Remember The Gold Fish
Microsoft Study on
Internet Users Time Per
Page
• 2002 = 12 seconds
• 2013 = 8 seconds
• Goldfish = 9 seconds
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Spontaneous Speech Success!
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Questions???
Colleen M. Niese
Principal
Marlyn Group, LLC
cniese@marlyngroupllc.com