By Eleanor Wong. Faculty of Law, NUS.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FR0Zlt42lr0&p=83FA1CD871F4A4E5
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5. Acquiring Skills of
Analysis and
Communication
• Ideally:
• activity: testing substance AND
excavating process
• feedback: timely AND detailed
• assessment: summative AND formative
8. Conferences
Specific Comments
1 Linkage between framing of the issue and brief answer could be slightly better.
Here, by emphasising “contractual” in the issue but then basing your answer on
“domestic”, there’s a slight disjunct.
2 Here, the emphasis on “personal capacity” operates a bit like the magician’s
misdirection -- it’s only relevant to someone who had seen the previous assignment.
The trick is in thinking about/understanding what the reader’s default position is
likely to be. When you say “Mrs. Tan hired Dr. Diego to do ABC....”, the default
position for most readers would be “in personal capacity”. There is thus no need to
bring it up. And bringing it up makes the reader wonder -- “Oh, might this be
relevant to the issue?”, when it isn’t.
It’s only because you know the facts of the previous assignment that you
emphasised this.
3 Ambiguous pronoun. There are several “hers” here.
4 Slightly confusing way of telling the story. Who’s Roy Jr.? The reader may not
know.
Looking at 2, 3 and 4 together, I’d say you have a slight issue with self-centredness
(don’t we all?). Good communication consists of putting yourself in the reader’s
shoes and telling him/her what he/she needs to know without assuming stuff that
only you know.
5 Slightly awkward sentence. Do you mean “English cases were based on...”?
6 This is a bit of a leap, in my view. Surely Farida is not directly on point and cannot
exclude anyone “from the action” (if by action you mean the loss of service action).
As you know from reading the different cases, the fact that the world has moved on
to treat maids differently doesn’t automatically have any effect on the cause of
action. While some judges use this as a policy reason for abolishing the cause of
action (e.g., Fullagar), others see it as a policy reason for extending the cause of
action. The other parts of this paragraph (see 7 below) use Farida much better.
7 Nice way to bring in Farida. Very good.