Slides for Day 5 in EWRT 211

1. EWRT 211
DAY 5

2. AGENDA
QUIZ
RETURN ESSAY 1
HOUSE POINTS
SENTENCES: COMPLEX SENTENCES (AND FRAGMENTS)
DISCUSSION “STAR TREK OR STAR WRECK?
1. WHAT IS THE THESIS STATEMENT FOR “STAR TREK OR STAR WRECK?
2. WHICH BODY PARAGRAPH IS THE STRONGEST? WHY?
3. HOW WOULD YOU IMPROVE EITHER THE INTRODUCTION OR THE
CONCLUSION?
INTRODUCE ESSAY #2:
JUSTIFYING AN EVALUATION
• NEW: MOVIE EVALUATION (USE FOUR OR FIVE CRITERIA; ADD AT LEAST TWO
NEW TO YOUR IN-CLASS ESSAY DRAFT)
• REVIEW THESIS CONSTRUCTION

3. READING AND VOCAB QUIZ
• THESE QUESTIONS WILL
COUNT AS INDIVIDUAL
POINTS TOWARD YOUR
GRADE.
• 1. WHAT CAUSES THE
DURSLEYS TO HOLD HARRY
PRISONER IN HIS ROOM?
• 2. TELL ME ONE THING
ABOUT GILDEROY
LOCKHART (THE NEW
PROFESSOR AT HOGWARTS).
• 3. HOW DOES HARRY GET
BACK TO HOGWARTS FOR
THE START OF SCHOOL?
• THESE QUESTIONS WILL
COUNT FOR HOUSE
POINTS.
• 4. WHAT DOES THE SPELL
“PETRIFICUS TOTALUS” DO?
• 5. WHAT DOES THE SPELL
“INCENDIO” DO?

4. ESSAY #1
• WHAT DOES THE RUBRIC MEAN?
• DO I HAVE TO PASS THIS ESSAY?
• WHAT DO WE DO NOW?
• WHAT WERE SOME COMMON ISSUES?

5. HOUSE POINTS DISTRIBUTION!
(AS OF 10/9, 10 AM)
• GRYFFINDOR: 32
• HUFFLECLAW: 28
• HUFFLEPUFF: 39
• RAVENCLAW: 39
• RAVENGRYFF: 38
• SLYTHERIN: 27
• FOR TODAY: 5 POINTS FOR
EACH MEMBER OF YOUR
HOUSE WHO WAS HERE ON
TIME.

6. DO YOU HAVE A GHOST
IN YOUR HOUSE?
• HUFFLECLAW AND SLYTHERIN
DO!
• WHEN THOSE HOUSES ADD UP
YOUR ATTENDANCE POINTS
FOR EACH DAY, ADD
ATTENDANCE POINTS FOR
YOUR GHOST EACH TIME.
• COME UP WITH A NAME FOR
YOUR GHOST!
• (THIS WILL GIVE THE SMALLER
HOUSES AN EQUAL SHOT AT
POINTS.)

7. SENTENCES:
COMPLEX SENTENCES AND
FRAGMENTS

8. #3: COMPLEX SENTENCE
A COMPLEX SENTENCE IS A SIMPLE SENTENCE
(INDEPENDENT CLAUSE) TO WHICH A PART OF
A SENTENCE (DEPENDENT CLAUSE) HAS BEEN
ADDED.
BECAUSE I LIKE TO STUDY GRAMMAR, I
LOVE THIS CLASS.
I LOVE THIS CLASS BECAUSE I LIKE TO
STUDY GRAMMAR.

9. A dependent clause joined to an independent
clause. (The dependent clause needs the
rest of the sentence for support.)
Because you love me, I love
you.
Dependent clause
Independent clause

10. A dependent clause contains a subject and verb. It begins with a
subordinating conjunction, and thus it does not express a completed
thought. A dependent clause is also called a subordinate clause.
Dependent clauses, like babies, cannot stand
alone.
Because you love me.
Fragment!

11. A TIP ON PUNCTUATION
SINCE DEPENDENT CLAUSES ARE ONLY
PART OF A SENTENCE, YOU CAN NEVER
CONNECT THEM TO ANOTHER SENTENCE
WITH A SEMICOLON. SEMICOLONS ARE
ONLY USED BETWEEN TWO INDEPENDENT
CLAUSES.
I HAVE LOVED YOU FOR YEARS ; ALTHOUGH I
NEVER ADMITTED IT.
I HAVE LOVED YOU FOR YEARS, ALTHOUGH I
NEVER ADMITTED IT.
OK
No!

12. COMMON SUBORDINATING
(DEPENDENT) CONJUNCTIONS
after even if now that that where
although even
though
once though whereas
as if rather than unless wherever
as if whenever since until whether
because in order
that
so that when which
before than in case while

13. WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING ARE
FRAGMENTS AND WHICH ARE
COMPLETE SENTENCES?
• EVEN THOUGH I LIKE HER
MUSIC.
• SHE CAN'T STOP EATING
FRENCH FRIES.
• AFTER HARRY GETS TO
HOGWARTS.
• WHEN DOBBY TALKS
ABOUT WORKING FOR HIS
FAMILY.
• ALTHOUGH NO ONE LIKES
FILCH.
• HERMIONE JUST LEFT.
• AS HE CAST THE SPELL.
• IF SNAPE KNOWS, HE’LL BE
ANGRY.

14. DISCUSS THESE
QUESTIONS IN
YOUR HOUSES!
1. What is the thesis statement
for “Star Trek or Star Wreck?
2. Which body paragraph is the
strongest? Why?
3. How would you improve
either the introduction or the
conclusion?
(BTW: I gave 3 house point for
correctly identifying the

15. WHY IS THIS NOT THE THESIS
STATEMENT?

16. WHY IS THIS NOT THE THESIS
STATEMENT?

17. WHY IS THIS THE THESIS STATEMENT?

18. WHY IS THIS NOT THE THESIS
STATEMENT?

19. INTRODUCE ESSAY #2:
JUSTIFYING AN EVALUATION
The Writing Assignment:
• Using both your in-class essay and the basic features of a “justifying an evaluation”
essay write a new essay evaluating the film Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.
Examine your subject closely, and make a judgment about it in a clear and concise
thesis statement. Give reasons for your judgment that are based on at least four
widely recognized criteria or standards for evaluating a film like this one. Support
your reasons with examples and other details from your subject. Your final essay
should be between three and five pages. (This means you should have at least
one line on page four to ensure you have filled three complete pages). Do not rely
on your in-class essay to substitute for this new essay. As you will see, this essay
assignment requires both more complex thinking and writing.
• Outside sources: this essay requires at least two direct quotations in addition to
other examples.

20. IN-CLASS WRITING:
DEVELOP YOUR
ARGUMENT
• ESTABLISH THE CRITERIA UPON WHICH YOU WILL JUDGE THE FILM. CHOOSE AT LEAST FOUR, BUT
YOU MIGHT EXPLORE SEVERAL MORE TO MAKE SURE YOU HAVE CHOSEN THE BEST OPTIONS TO
SUPPORT YOUR OPINION.
• STORY: DOES THE MOVIE HAVE A PLOT THAT TELLS BOTH AN INTRIGUING AND UNUSUAL STORY?
DOES THE PLOT MAKE SENSE? IS THE STORY LINE LOGICAL? IS THE NARRATIVE ARC WELL SHAPED
AND STAY FOCUSED ON THE CLIMAX? OR IS IT DRAWN OUT AND BORING WITH TIME-KILLING
POINTLESSNESS? ARE THE CHARACTER’S ACTIONS JUSTIFIED? ARE THEIR MOTIVES REASONABLE?
DO CHARACTERS BEHAVE WITH CONSISTENCY? OR DO SOME WORDS, THOUGHTS, OR ACTIONS
RING FALSE?
• ACTING: DO THE ACTORS CONVINCE THE AUDIENCE THEY ARE THE CHARACTERS THEY ARE
PORTRAYING. DO THEY MEET THE EXPECTATIONS DICTATED BY THE PLOT AND OTHER STORY
ELEMENTS? IF NOT, IS IT THEIR OWN ACTING DEFICIENCIES THAT HOLD THEM BACK? OR ARE THEY
HAMPERED BY A POOR SCRIPT? WHAT COULD THE ACTORS HAVE DONE DIFFERENTLY TO MAKE THE
MOVIE WORK BETTER?
• SPECIAL EFFECTS: DO FILM VISUALS MAINTAIN A PROFESSIONAL QUALITY AND STIMULATE THE
AUDIENCE? OR ARE THEY PHONY LOOKING AND UNBELIEVABLE? ARE SPECIAL EFFECTS USED
APPROPRIATELY? DO THEY COMPLIMENT THE EMOTIONS OF A SCENE AND SUPPORT THE SETTING?

21. NEW
• Suspense: does the film keep the audience on edge and make them eagerly
anticipate a resolution? Are there particular elements of suspense that you can
name? For example, does the cinematography make it suspenseful? The
dialogue? The film cuts?
• Realism/accuracy: is the film believable? Even fantasy films must operate inside
of the realm of possibility that viewers can accept. Does the film portray events
and people as they are in real-word settings as much as possible? Are actions and
interactions believable, plausible, and at least somewhat relatable given the genre
of the film?
• Setting: are the characters in an environment that contributes to or supports their
actions and interactions? Does the setting emphasize the themes and moods of the
film? Is the scenery aesthetically pleasant? Or does it detracting from the main
focus of the scene?

22. A FEW MORE NEW
CRITERIA TO CHOOSE
FROM
• Technical elements: how do the cinematography, editing, lighting, sound, and
other components support or detract from the film? Does the camera crew
capture the scenes in a manner that best illustrates the story? How do these
elements contribute to or detract from the film?
• Soundtrack: is the music appropriate and effectively employed? Does the sound
complement the visuals? Does it help convey the emotion of each scene?
• Originality: does the film present some new concept or idea that has hardly
been explored by its predecessors? Is there creativity and innovation? Is it fresh
content? Or does it tell an old story in a conventional way?
• Message: is there a message, moral, or ethic in the story? Is the message
important or compelling to contemporary audiences?

23. REVIEW THESIS CONSTRUCTION
• Remember that a strong thesis statement should be clear, arguable,
and appropriately qualified. As you consider your overall judgment,
keep in mind that readers of evaluative essays expect writers to
present a balanced evaluation of a subject by pointing out strengths as
well as weaknesses. At the same time, however, readers expect to
encounter a definitive judgment, not a vague, wishy-washy, or
undecided judgment.
• In you initial draft of your thesis, you might want to make some
reference to the four criteria you plan to evaluation for the out-of-
class essay.

24. WEDNESDAY’S CLASS
• I WON’T BE HERE. I WILL BE AT A
CONFERENCE NEAR SF.
• I WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE ON
EMAIL!
• THERE WILL BE A SUB:
MR. BRIAN SMITH.
• HE WILL TAKE ROLL (AND MAKE
SURE I GET THE INFO FOR
HOUSE POINTS).
• THREE ACTIVITIES:
• 1. YOU WILL GO OVER YOUR
HOMEWORK IN YOUR
HOUSES.
• 2. YOU WILL TURN YOUR HW
OUTLINE INTO ACTUAL
PARAGRAPHS (BRING ESSAY
#1, A HARD COPY OF YOUR
HW, AND WRITING
MATERIALS—INCLUDING
LAPTOP, IF YOU LIKE).
• 3. YOU WILL WATCH SOME
SCENES FROM THE MOVIE

25. HOMEWORK
Read HP Chapter 8 pages 122- 139
Vocabulary: Spells 1-12
HW Discussion 5: Outline at least four body paragraphs for Essay #2.
•Two should be based on new evaluation criteria.
•Two can be revised versions of your in-class essay body
paragraphs.
Each body paragraph on your outline should include: the POINT of
that paragraph, the INFORMATION that you will use to support that
point, and the EXPLANATION of how that information supports your
point.
Think about which quotes from the movie you might need for your
body paragraphs.
Bring to class on Wednesday:
--Essay #1
--A printed copy of your HW Discussion 5
--any materials that you would need to work on Essay #2 in
class (including laptop if you want).