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Gh date resume
1. Why you should
DATE ME
(just email me will do, tried tinder and
it never fails to disappoint)
Version 1.2, 23/11/2017
2. Background
I’m 30. (but I can still pull
off looking like 16.)
I do product marketing.
(you can be assured that I
don’t false advertise
myself)
Nerd by nature, so I can
listen to you talk about
science, animals, and stuff
with absolute interest.
I can play the harmonica
so you don’t have to worry
about my retirement plans
(I think the revenue is only
enough for one person).
3. Aesthetics
Using the golden ratio
calculations, my face
scores a whopping
9.2 out of 10 without
makeup. (I know, I’m
shocked too, that photo
is so ugly but maybe it’s
the lighting and the
hair???)
Anyway, scientifically
I’m attractive.
You can trust science.
4. I’m 162cm and approx. 45kg.
46.3kg after dinner. I’m very
specific so you know I don’t lie
about my profile.
My stats are: 32 , 25 , 36. If
you’re a butt/legs person,
I’m your type.
I don’t have 6 packs, but I have
a flat tummy with lines… and
they all probably disappear
after I eat something. So you
don’t have to feel bad if yours is
an ex-6packs.
P.S: I know how aesthetics are
important to guys, so I’ve
dedicated TWO PAGES for
this.
Aesthetics
5. I’m low maintenance. If you
want to bring me out for a
date without spending
money, just bring me to the
library or a bookstore.
I’m not picky with food, we
don’t need to go fancy
restaurants, but I SWEAR if
you touch my food, you
won’t live to your next
meal. If I feel generous I
will give you a TINY BIT to
try. (take note it’s to try, if
it’s nothing new, I won’t
offer)
I am not materialistic and I
don’t go for branded bags,
shoes, clothes etc, so you
know your money is safe.
Sustainability
My default work
bag, probably
cheaper than
yours.
6. Skills
I just bought this book so you
can have the honor to be my
guinea pig.
I just got accepted to be part
of my company’s safety team
(... actually I volunteered).
I’m gonna be trained in first
aid so you know you can
always count on me to save
you.
I can cook. Not restaurant
style but it’s very healthy and
you get vege, meat, soup, all
in one bowl. You can be
assured you will live a long
life free of heart diseases,
diabetes and hypertension.
7. Skills
I can sing (on lucky days I don’t
go off tune).
I can dance. That’s the
bollywood dance trophy I’ve got
(consolation prize but I really
thought we should have been in
top 3).
I do ballroom latin dance –
actually dancing will be more
important to me than you, so
you need to know this. But I
don’t have a partner, you’re
more than welcome to become
my partner. If you become my
partner, you will be equally as
important. Cool?????
Me
rocking at
KTV
This is not me, but
this could be US!!!!!
8. In relationships
I don’t need to talk on the
phone all day everyday
because I have my own fixed
schedule of dance lessons,
classes, etc. In fact, I think
it’s better we have stipulated
days on when we can meet.
#justsaying
My relationships always last
at least one year. If it doesn’t
last as long with you, it’s
definitely your fault.
I don’t dig up the past. (I
gotta admit, it’s actually
because of my poor memory.
But I will not forget your
birthday!!!)
age
no . of years
*information correct as of 23/11/2017
9. My family runs a flower
business so you can buy
flowers for me at a cheap
price and we’ll all have a
win-win situation.
My parents are super
modern and speak minimal
English. You can just say
“hello” and “how are you”
and they will be happy.
Family
10. Want to know more???
EMAIL ME!
IT’S FREE!!!!!!!
Disclaimer: Ineligible bachelors will not receive any reply. But you can try. No harm right?
Ok wait, before you do, please finish the self-quiz on the next slide.
11. Self-Quiz
Yes No
1
Do you have snoring issues or do you breathe heavily?
(I'm a light sleeper and I can't breathe properly when I hear other
people's breathing sounds)
2
Is your height x < 175 or x > 186cm?
(If you have problem answering this question, just answer yes)
3 Do you eat with smacking sounds or do you slurp your soup loudly)
4 Do you smoke, do drugs or get drunk?
5 Did you commit any felony?
6 Are you sticky/needy? (I'm kinda claustrophobic)
7 Are you married?????
8 Do you have fungus or anything I should know about?
Bonus Questions
8 Do you dance latin ballroom and do you want to be my partner?
9
Do you have a band where you can invite me to jam together?
(I'm gonna take the singer lead, ok background singer works too)
If you answered yes for ANY of the
qns 1-7,
Pls don’t email me.
Yeah I know I’m gonna be alone forever.
Ok thanks for your attention, bye.
If you answered no for ALL
qns 1-7,
Ok, this will give you the courage to
email me.
If you answered yes for
ANY of the bonus
questions.
Ok , PLEASE EMAIL ME.