Final Grade: B+

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Rut SetioNastiti
EN 112
Dr. Geisweidt
4/12/2012
Interracial Relationship
Study Case of Asian women and White men:
Does the good outweigh the bad?
Research has shown a number of couples who are involved in interracial relationships
haveincreased. This might indicate that society is more open to differences, than it was for the
past three decades. The level of interracial relationship varies; interracial marriage is the
strongest form and other such as, interracial dating which can be more casual. The two kinds of
form however are still considered as minority relationships. It is not only because people are
afraid of public opinion or stigmas, but interracial relationship is not motivated or promoted.
Taking into account, in some Asian countries, interracial relationshipsare not often encouraged
by most Asian parents, especially for women. They would be happier if their daughters marry
within their race who shares the same norms, cultures, and or traditions. It is not because Asian
parents are not open-minded; some of them are moderate in other aspect such as education,
since statistic shows more of Asian women earned higher degree. Asian parents perceive
people from different racial background who are often considered as “Westerner” or “Western
People” as having a different set of values about families, marriage, even the most fundamental
principle such as faith. These cultural differences could be challenging for the couples since
interracial relationship between Asian women and White men is still partially being
stigmatized; howeverinterracial relationship could potentially bring betterment for couples,
children of interracial couples and the society.

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Asians are well-known for their long-preserved traditions, family values, obedience,
and other cultural sensibilities. Some of the cultures are really unique in Asian families and to
other people from other races. For example the most distinguished one among the Asians is
younger people are obligated to refer to older people as aunty and uncle not by first names and
younger family members are encouraged to serve tea to or cherish the older family members
.According to an article by Rachel L. Swarns in the New York Times, “interracial marriages
rates are at an all-time high in the United States. (1)” Nevertheless, Asian-Americans are
rearing that trend; increasingly they choose to date or marry among their community. Chau Le,
33, a Vietnamese-American Boston lawyer who received her degree at Oxford University said
her parents had “given up a hope” that she would marry a Vietnamese man,She said her dating
statistic never indicated that she would end up marrying an Asian man. However, somewhere
along the way Le thought that she needed someone who is “slightly more attuned to her
cultural sensibilities”(3). Swarns saysmost of the Asians know instinctively that he or she
should not kiss his or her significant other in front of their parents. This applies to many of the
Asians from different national backgrounds. For example even though Le‟s fiancé, Neil
Vaishnav, 31, is Indian-American, he knows that he should not kiss Le in front of her parents.
This norm is also observed in India and some other Asian countries.
Cultural sensibilities are even bigger concerns for the parents thanfor the children, since
some of the parents have not really been exposed to a diverse environment, they tend to be
around their comfort zone, or they choose to stay true to what they believe as the norm.
Cultural sensibility becomes a concern for them because among some Asian or Asian-
American families, parents might live with their children someday. Asian families have a deep
family tradition, norms, and values that emphasize the importance of older people or parents
which can be found as strange for other cultures such as American or European.
Another reason why interracial marriage is not popular or favored among Asian parents
or families historically has a strong relationship with the period of colonization by European

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countries or United States to South East or East Asian countries; which is the concept of
orientalism. The concept of orientalism was really popular because historically it was common
that the soldiers of colonizer countries used Asian women to fulfill their sexual desire.
Additionally, most people stigmatize Asian woman who married White man as a mean to raise
her socioeconomic status. Therefore, Asian parents see interracial relationship as degradation
for the Asian women‟s dignity.
Edward Said author ofOrientalismin his book claims that the relationship between the
West and the East is “a relationshipof power, of domination, of varying degrees of a complex
hegemony” (57). Said defines orientalism as “the generic term that [he has] been employing to
describe the Westernapproach to the Orient; Orientalism is the discipline by which the Orient
was (and is)approached systematically, as a topic of learning, discovery, and practice” (73).
This is systematical notion has been perceived by many Asian parents and therefore this is the
way they think about the West.
Dr. Bitna Kim, a professor of criminology in Indiana University of Pennsylvania who
examined Orientalism said, “Orientalism is not from the Orient, but from the Occident. It is
not for Orient, but forOccident to define Occident and to situate the West as a superior culture
to the East.” Said states in his book that “orientalism is not a European fantasy about the
Orient, but atheory created by Europeans for centuries for their own political, economic,
religious, andimperial interests and goods” (43). This explanation is supported by Said‟s theory
that “the Orient was transubstantiated from resistant hostility into obliging, and submissive,
partnership” (92). Literally this conception can be interpreted as a failure of the Western
people to see the authentic characteristics of the Eastern (Asians).
The West characterized for granted and indoctrinated to the Eastern that they are
superior. This also implies a false self-valued that the Eastern is inferior than the Western and
vice versa. This false conception is the attitude that most of the Asian parents (who might have
experienced the beginning of post-World War II) take to prevent their children‟s as being

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dishonored, especially if the family comes from a respectable educational or socioeconomic
background. However, both Said and Kim agree that orientalism is a collective false
assumption based on the colonial mentality of the West. Said said “these false and
romanticized images of the East had served as an implicit justification forthe West‟s colonial
and imperial ambitions. Therefore, orientalism is distorted knowledge.”(80). However, in
nowadays life, orientalism is not a common concept that is usually used to describe a
relationship between an Asian women and a western man.
The concept of orientalism has somewhat transformed or become more popular as
fetishism in the 20thcentury. According to Martin P. Kafka‟s DSMIII-R (Diagnostic and
Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) fetishism is “typically operationally
described as persistent preferential sexual arousal in associationwith non-living objects, an
over-inclusive focus on (typicallynon-sexual) body parts (e.g., feet, hands) and body
secretions” (1).In an article written by Rachel L. Swarns for the New York Times who featured
a Taiwanese-American woman, Ann Liu, 33, who lives in San Francisco and who always dated
white guys, but now is married to a Filipino-American engineersaid she had developed
increasingly uncomfortable with dating white men who dated only Asian-American
women.Liusaid , “It‟s like they have an Asian fetish. I felt I was more like this „concept‟. They
could not really understand me as a person completely. (4)”
According to research done by Dr. Bitna Kim who conducted five email and five face-
to-face interviews with Caucasian men who dated, are dating, are seeking to date, or married to
Asian women gave answers that hintedthat based on their experiences, Asian women are
acquiescent. Apart from the negative stereotypes, some of them mentioned that manyAsian
womenheld positive stereotypes;“intelligent, educated, successful, family-oriented, and
beautiful” (7). Kim argues that the answers that were given are examples of generalization that
comes from not only limited experiences, but also limitedlevel of education. One of the
correspondents said that“people whouse the term Asian fetish are trying to dissuade Asian

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women from dating non-Asianmen; there are a lot of Asian men who are controlling,jealous,
and insecure from which this Asian fetish notion can be attributed to” (6).
This assumption is relevant witharesearch done by a group of graduate students from
Columbia University, University of Chicago, and Stanford Universitywhich discovered that
“for male partners [the] finding is that Asians [males] generally receive lower ratings than men
of other races.When the regressions [was run] separately for each race, [it was found]that even
Asian womenfind white, black, and Hispanic men to be more attractive than Asian men. Given
that Asian menwere the group that other races expressed strongest preference against, and that
Asian women expressedthe least preference against other races” (8). However, critiques is
found toward the research since, it does not reflect the whole trend in the USA, since more
than half of the participants (63%) are White, and the rest were divided between Asian,
Hispanic and Black. Nevertheless, it can be interpreted that Asian men have less chances to
date women outside their race.
The misconception and generalization are two of many reasons why interracial
relationships are still a minority.Another reason is the challenges that might arise from
interracial relationshipare rather more complicated than people who date within their race. Lee
S. Shulman and W. AndrewCollins who are notable educational psychologists from Stanford
University claim that“families and friends appear as the most salient groups that influence
individuals when choosing a romantic partner. (125)” This might be even true for most Asian
women since the relationship between them and their family members is so strong and
intimate. Datzman and Gardernerreport similar findings from 19 in-depth qualitative
interviews which show “families may mirror the rejection received by the larger society and
impose restrictions if their members disagree with the relationship” (16). This is the first
challenge for Asian women when they start a new relationship out of their race; to get
acceptance from the family members. However, this acceptance varies between families and
their environment.

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As the status of the interracial relationship gets more robust, the challenge that has to
be overcome gets more complicated.The difficulty that might arise from the outcome of
interracial marriage, which is the strongest form of a relationship, is the identification of
interracial couple„schildren‟s race. This sometimes can lead to confusion. In many cases, races
were considered to be mutually exclusive; therefore children of intermarried couples had to
choose one race over the other.Mary C. Waterssays“whites of various European ethnic
backgrounds usually have weak ethnicattachment and have options to identify their ethnic
identity” (318). However, Saenz argues that “racial identification of children with one Asian
parent is not random and depends on parents‟ socioeconomic status and [the] demographic
characteristics” (179). Therefore, when white of various European ethnic an Asian, there are
many factors that can determine the children‟s ethnic identity.
Saenz argues that“Asian-American and white couples are more likely to identify their
children as ethnic Asian if the father is an Asian-American than if the mother is an Asian-
American” (186). It can be derived that fathers play an important role in deciding the race of
their children. However, it has been suggested byDr. Hart NelsonProfessor of Sociology in
Pennsylvania State University that mothers are the most important in transferring or handing
down culture since they generally spend a more significant amount of time with the children
compared to the fathers (126). However, both parents play the most crucial role in the
transmission of culture and the development of the ethnic identification of children (Waters,
318). Therefore the identification of children‟s ethnicity can be determined depending on the
parenting styles of the family.
Even though parents play an important role to determine the racial identification of
their children;the children also have the option to determine their ethnicity. According to
Salgado de Synder et al “one of the factors that is most closely associated with ethnic identity
is the degree to which the child is exposed to the culture of the minority parent”(280). He also
claims that language maintenance is crucial in the development of ethnic identity. To support

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Salgado‟s view on this, Saenz finds that “children who speak a language other than English at
home tend to be significantly less likely to have an Anglo ethnic identity compared to those
who speak English at home”(186). Additionally Saenz claims“children of [interracial
couples]who live with ethnic members with many fellow ethnics tend to find supportive
mechanism, such as ethnic networks and institution [that] allow them to readily maintain their
ethnicity” (180). The environment also plays an important role for children of interracial
couples to preserve their ethnic identity.
A good maintenance in language of mixed-race children would bring benefits to the
children. “Being bilingual, it turns out, makes you smarter. It can have a profound effect on
your brain, improving cognitive skills not related to language and even shielding against
dementia in old age” (1) said YudhitBhattacharjee in his article for the New York Times. This
is not just a practical skill that is needed in a globalized world.Bhattacharjee said “Many
researchers, educators, and policy makers long considered a second language to be an
interference, cognitively speaking, that hindered a child‟s academic and intellectual
development” (1).
Bhattacharjee who has written stories on different topics related to research and policy
in neuroscience, claims being bilingual improve the brain‟s executive function. The purpose of
executive function is todirect the attention processes for planning, solving problems, and
performing mentally demanding tasks (Bhattacharjee, 2). Especially in the case of Asian
women and White men, since each country in Asia and Europe has its own distinguished
language (taking into account English is native to people in the United Kingdom and United
States). If the children of interracial couple would be raised in bilingual environment, they will
have these advantages over monolingual children. These advantages include “ignoring
distractions to stay focused, switching attention willfully from one thing to another, and
holding information in mind” (Bhattacharjee, 2).

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Even though environmentally there are a number of challenges that arise from being
interracial children, biologically interracial children could potentially have the “hybrid vigor”
genes. According to an article in Channel 4 Race and Science, “animals and plants born to
genetically dissimilar parents often exhibit „hybrid vigor‟. [therefore they will be] having
higher growth rates and greater resistance to disease” (2). Hence, some scientists think it is
possible that mixed race children gain a noticeable genetic advantage and show a degree of
hybrid vigor.
The article compares inbreeding and outbreeding in animals and plants. Inbreeding,
where the parents are closely related, tends to produce very unfit offspring. In contrast,
outbreeding, or being unrelated, can lead to hybrid vigor. In addition, “marryingan extremely
unrelated partner should be good for the same reason; the number of genes in [interracial
couple‟s] children that are identical by descent is reduced, and with it the chance that a gene
has two broken copies” (Channel 4 Race and Science,3). This means it is possible that the
outcome of offspring creates a unique feature, for example black hair with blue eyes or
brunette hair with darker skin. The article has somehow suggests a hidden message to deliver
the false assumption that it is biologically hazardous or harmful to out marry different race,
since race is not something genetic but social.
Regardless of the social boundaries or challenges for the interracial couples, interracial
marriage can be seen from its socioeconomic perspectives. A combination of anAsian and
White spouse hasthe highest combined median income. The common trend elicits that
newlyweds who are interracial have better income than single-race newlyweds, when it is
combined (with Asian-Asian as exception in the third highest). Asian groom and White bride
make the most income, while White groom and Asian bride are in the second place with only $
848 difference (Pew Research, 6). The false assumption or prejudice that has been put towards
Asian women who married White men for the sake of raising their economic status is not
adequate and is an example of stereotypes in the society.The result can also be interpreted that

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interracial marriage could potentially bring a better financial situation for their family, which
in the long term will be beneficial for their children.
Pew Research Center also finds out that “when it comes to education, white newlyweds
who married Asians are more educated than whites, blacks, or Hispanic (…) Also, about six-
in-ten Asian newlyweds who married white are college educated” (6). Therefore, when an
Asian woman chooses to marry a White man,it should not be seen as a degradation of Asian
women‟s values; since most of them are educated and financially proficient. Along with it,
White man who chooses to marry Asian women should not be considered as having fetish,
especially in a country with a high diversity such as United States. From the research, a pattern
is also seen that newlyweds who out-marry from other races, such as Hispanics and Blacks, are
also more likely to be more college-educated than those who married within their group.
Therefore it can be understood that people who out-marry are likely to be more open-minded,
unprejudiced or more tolerant, since the interracial marriage will cause a lot of barriers for the
couplesto overcome insociety. Interracial couples show willingness to learn new cultures, to
understand differences, and to overcome the challenges.
Saenz et al state “assimilation does not necessarily indicate the loss of their minority
identities. In contrast, their racial awareness may heighten because of their direct contact and
competition with mainstream society,” (176). A heighten in racial awareness could also create
a unique race for example Amerasian or Eurasian which makes children of interracial couple
feel less excluded. Interracial marriage can potentially change the historical characteristic of
the mutual-exclusiveness of race. Therefore children of interracial couples can normally
identify themselves asmulti-racial with more acceptancesand less stigma from the society.
Saenz et al argues when minorities marry [W]hites, they become assimilated into the majority
of American economic, political, and family life (191).
Saenz claims“intermarriage has traditionally represented one of the most accurate
indicators of assimilation” (176). He also argues that “for the minority-group individuals, the

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choice of a spouse from the majority group suggest that structural and interpersonal barrier
inhibiting interaction between minority and majority groups have been reduced significantly.”
These two perspectives are supported by the Pew Research Center‟s survey that shows
intermarriage has become more common. Only 11% Americans say interracial marriages
worsen the society, however 43% Americans say that more people of different races marrying
each other has been a change for a better in society (7). Forty-four percent Americans think
there is no difference in any kind of marriage. The three different perspectives show that public
attitude has become more tolerant towards interracial relationships.
Interracial relationships should not be defamed by the society. Biologically, it has been
demonstrated that assimilation of two different races brings no harm for the society. However,
the way how society sees assimilation is usually the reason for the problems that arise for the
couples and their children. Stereotypes should also be put aside about interracial relationships,
especially in this case between Asian women and White men. When interracial relationships
are seen thoroughly, there are many potential enhancementsthat could potentially yield a better
quality of life.

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Work Cited
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benefits-of-bilingualism.html>. Print
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Collins, W. A. Relationships and development: Family adaptation to individual
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Notes on the Public Management of Black-White Interracial Romantic
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