Each day we are saddled with difficult and challenging situations. Often times, we meet and relate with difficult people either closely as colleagues, bosses, friends and relatives (supposed) or from a distance as mere acquaintances. Either way, we need to be equipped in managing difficult situations and people! Find out from these slides of mine on how to be ahead of difficult situations and people! Take charge! Adetoun Omole (ACIPM).
2. Learning Objectives
At the end of the sessions, participants
should be able to:
• describe the different situations that
are termed “difficult”;
• identify people that could be
regarded as difficult; and
• state ways of managing difficult
situations and people.
3. Introduction
• Life is in cycles and phases.
• We all desire peaceful and joyful moments, but
some unexpected events come up that leave us
shaken and disturbed.
• Sometimes, some people we have to interact with
makes life seemingly unbearable.
• Understanding these occurrences and learning to
manage them appropriately is necessary.
• Our ability to manage difficult situations and
people reflect positively in our lives and equip us
to support others in similar situations.
4. Content
• Learning Objectives
• Introduction
• Content
• Characteristics and examples of difficult
situations
• Characteristics of difficult people
• Wrong approaches and reactions to
handling issues
• Handling difficult situations
• Handling difficult people
• Conclusion
5. Characteristics of Difficult Situations
Physical changes e.g. break out in sweat,
tears, increased use of the toilet, very high
or very low blood pressures
• Disrupt planned schedules e.g. timetable or
budget
• Bring about confusion in deciding on the
way forward or the best alternative
• Increases high blood pressure (HBP)
• Leads to emotional breakdown with feelings
of rejection or depression or even loneliness
6. Examples of difficult situations
• Hearing a devastating news
• Physically Related – Terminal illness, extreme changes in health or
unexpected change of environment
• Emotionally Related – Bereavement, Separation or Divorce,
Loneliness, Unwanted pregnancy, Loss of pregnancy
• Financially Related – Loss of means of income, or savings or
investment, fire incidences
• Mentally Related – Failure, Complete or partial loss of memory
• Addictions or habits one is trying to overcome
7. “Difficult” People
• You have negative feelings whenever you anticipate
meeting them or even communicating with them; or
whenever you have thoughts about them
• They leave you with negative feelings about yourself or
situations
• They make you say or do what you don’t feel good
about, or things you tend to always regret
• You are never on the same “page” and always seem to
have conflicting opinions and preferences
• They are known to cause more chaos and confusion
than order and peace
8. Managing difficult situations the right
way . . .
• Be clear on the ones within your control and the ones out of your
control
• Identify the cyclical ones, note it down in a diary or reminder to
prepare psychologically for it, or put measures in place e.g.
leaving early for an appointment as against rushing
• Have a support group; this could be family, group of friends,
religious group or even one friend
• Try to develop a backup or alternative especially for financially
related
• Express yourself without infecting harm on self or others….more
for emotional ones where one is hurting and feels the need to cry
• Ask for help/collaboration
• Seek professional
9. Difficult situations and people. . .
builds your resilience – you become stronger, “I
never knew I had such capacity to withstand this
problem...”
challenges you i.e. puts you on your toes
empowers you to help/support others based on
your experience
shows you your “true” friends and relatives
10. Managing difficult
situations/people the
wrong way
Pretence - denial
Running away – avoidance
Reacting rather than
responding
Keeping quiet when you
ought to challenge the people or
situation. Be assertive and don’t
concede
Inability to seek appropriate
and timely counsel
Failure to disclose the actual
facts ( as the case may).
Becoming physical
11. Manage difficult situations and
people by....
• Having a positive image of yourself
• Understanding the different personality types
• Avoiding pre-judgments
• Identifying the positive traits of these people
and leveraging on them
• Discovering their expectations or issues and
working around it, especially if seasonal e.g.
your boss, supervisor, parents/spouse etc
12. Class Activity
Discuss some practical ways of
managing difficult situations and
people that has worked for you
13. Conclusion
As long as we are in this world, one is likely to be faced with
situations and people that are termed “difficult”.
Taking the wrong approaches whenever these occur leave one
even worse than desirable.
Identify these difficult situations and people early enough and
develop the ability and maturity to manage them.
With the experiences gained in this regard, one is also able to
provide support to others who may be passing through such
difficult situations.
14. Reading lists
For further study:
• Heller, R. (1998). Communicate Clearly. Dorling
Kindersley Limited, London.
• Templar, R. (2003). The Rules of Work. Pearson
Education Limited. Edinburgh Gate.
• Ziglar, Z. (2006). Better Than Good. Thomas
Nelson. Nashville, Tenn.
• Maxwell, J.C. ( 2007). Talent Is Never Enough.
Thomas Nelson Inc.