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Attachment Theory and Improving Relationships Danielle Cooper, Nicole Fleming, Kirsten Rowland, and Tracey Wright
overview I. Overview of Attachment Theory (Bowlby, 1973, 1980; Feeney & Noller, 1990; Hazan & Shaver, 1987; Fraley, 2004) II. Attachment Assessment (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991) III. The Four Attachment Styles  IV. Role-Play Workshop
Attachment styles Secure Anxious-preoccupied Dismissive-avoidant Fearful-avoidant
Secure	 Style  A - “It is easy for me to become emotionally close to others. I am comfortable depending on them and having them depend on me. I don’t worry about being alone or having others not accept me.” (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991)
Secure Low avoidance, low anxiety (Fraley, 2004) Children experienced caregivers who were nurturing and caring (Egeci, 2006)  Shows more initiated levels of self-disclosure (Egeci, 2006)  Has positive views of themselves and others (Bippus, 2003)
Assessment dimensions
Anxious-Preoccupied Style C - “I want to be completely emotionally intimate with others, but I often find that others are reluctant to get as close as I would like. I am uncomfortable being without close relationships, but I sometimes worry that others don’t value me as much as I value them.” (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991)
Anxious-Preoccupied Low, avoidance, high anxiety (Fraley, 2004) May not feel loved completely; Easily frustrated  or angered when attachment needs unmet (Fraley, 2004).  Negative childhood experiences (Simpson, Winterheld, Rholes & Orina,2007) More responsive to emotional care-giving(Simpson, Winterheld, Rholes & Orina,2007) Strongly motivated to experience "felt“ security (Simpson, Collins, Tran, Haydon, 2007) Expressed dependence and desire for commitment in relationships (Feeney & Noller, 1990)
Assessment dimensions
Dismissive-Avoidant Style D - “I am comfortable without close emotional relationships. It is very important to me to feel independent and self-sufficient, and I prefer not to depend on others or have others depend on me.” (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991)
Dismissive-Avoidant Low anxiety, high avoidance (Fraley, 2004) Children experienced caregivers as unreliable and unresponsive (Stackert & Bursik, 2002) Personal insecurities influence how they perceive others (Vicary & Fraley, 2009)
Assessment dimensions
Fearful-avoidant Style B -“I am uncomfortable getting close to others. I want emotionally close relationships, but I find it difficult to trust others completely, or to depend on them. I worry that I will be hurt if I allow myself to become too close to others.” (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991)
Fearful-Avoidant High anxiety, high avoidance (Fraley, 2004) Children experience caregivers who were distant or absent (Mallinckrodt, Coble, & Gantt, 1995) See themselves and others negatively (Woodhouse, Schlosser, Crook, Ligiero, & Gelso, 2003) Tends to minimize closeness in order to avoid rejection (Woodhouse, Schlosser, Crook, Ligiero, & Gelso, 2003)
Assessment dimensions
Secure & insecure Attachment Video Examples Couple’s Therapy 45  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8F-CCC5Y7yI&feature=PlayList&p=131E06DC6C82CABF&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=46 Therapy Session 34  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBM-kDUGs7I&feature=PlayList&p=131E06DC6C82CABF&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=34
Dating studyby witcher & Kanoy Peace College students: N=113 Completed surveys on relationship experiences Couples videotaped discussing conflicting situations Three variables showed a significant correlation: commitment, violence, and dyadic adjustment
Dating Study, continued Data Set – ANOVA Commitment F(3,109) = 15.42, p<.001 Violence F(3,109) = 5.79, p<.001 Dyadic Adjustment F(3, 109) = 3.99, p<.01
Dating study Tablecommitment
Dating Study TableViolence
Dating Study TableDyadic adjustment
ImprovingRelationships:Health Relationships can contribute to things like stress, depression, loss of self-esteem or confidence, and even physical illness (Schoebi, 2008) Partners health can have lasting consequences on their relationship, as well as physical and psychological well-being (Schoebi, 2008) Married and cohabitating partners will resemble each other in health status, either positive or negatively (Monden, 2007) When people are in a strong, committed relationship they stop engaging in risky behavior and take better care of their physical and mental health (Monden, 2007)
Improving relationships: Couple’s Therapy Focus one specific aspect leads to greater changes (Doss, Yeow, Sevier, et. al., 2005). Individual cognitions greatly influence how emotions and behavioral interactions are expressed within relationships (Carrere, Buehlman, Gottman, et. al., 2000). Distressed couples are more likely to remember negative events vs. positive events (Carrere, Buehlman, Gottman, et. al., 2000). Therapists use a unique set of skills to help couples effectively deal with conflict within their relationships (Gottman, 1998, 1999).
Improving Relationships: Stress Some stress is necessary in life Unmanaged chronic stress can have negative effects on physical and psychological health of an individual  (Cohen, Gunthert, Farrehi,  & Tolpin, 2006). Ways to Cope with Stress (Christopher,  Christopher,  & Shure, 2008) Exercise Yoga Meditation Qigong Mindfulness
Improving relationships: emotional stability Simpson, Collins, Tran & Traydon, 2007 Secure  Remain confident, responsive, and available Build greater intimacy Insecure Look for self-affirming strategies Suppress urges to self-regulate or internalize problems Avoidant Stress-relieving techniques Obtain and maintain interpersonal autonomy and control Anxious Avoid emotion-focused coping strategies Achieve greater “felt” security
Improving Relationships Conflict resolution Positive and Negative strategies Accommodate (I Lose, You Win)  Avoid (I Lose, You Lose)  Compromise (We Both Lose, We Both Win)  Compete (I Win, You Lose)   Collaborate (I Win, You Win)  Use of “I” statements Communication
References Barnes, S. Brown, K. Campbell, W. Krusemark, E. & Rogger R. (2007). The 	Role of Mindfulness in Romantic Relationship Satisfaction and 	Response to relationship stress. Journal of Marriage and Family 	Therapy. 4(33). 482-500 Berger, Kathleen S. (2007). The Developing Person Through the Lifespan. 	New York, NY, US: Worth Publishers,192-197. Bippus, A., Rollin, E. (2003). Attachment Style Differences in Relational 	Maintenance  and Conflict Behaviors: Friends' Perceptions. 	Communication Reports,  16(2) Calhoun, L., Cann, A., Norman, A., Welbourne, J. (2008). Attachment 	Styles, Conflict Styles and Humor Styles: Interrelationships and 	Associations with Relationship. European Journal of Personality, 	22(2), pp. 131-146 Carrere, S., Buehlman, K., Gottman, J., Ruckstuhl, L., & Coan, J. (2000). 	Predicting  Marital Stability and divorce in newlywed couples. 	Journal of Family Psychology, 14 (1), 42-58. Christopher, J. Christopher, S. & Shure, M. (2008). Mind-Body Medicine 	and the Art of Self-Care: Teaching Mindfulness to Counseling 	Students through Yoga, Meditation, and Qigong. Journal of   	Counseling & Development. 3(86) Cohen, L. Gunthert, K. Farrehi, A. & Tolpin, L. (2006). Unique Effects of 	Depressive Symptoms and Relationship Satisfaction on Exposure 	and Reactivity to Daily Romantic Relationship Stress. Journal of 	Social and Clinical Psychology. 5(25). 565-583  
References Continued Doss, B. D., Thum, Y. M., Sevier, M., Atkins, D. C., Christensen, A. (2005). 	Improving relationships: Mechanisms of change in couple therapy. Journal 	of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 73 (4), 624-633. Egeci, S., Gençöz, T.(2006). Factors Associated with Relationship 	Satisfaction. Contemporary Family Therapy: An International 	Journal, 28(3), 383-391 Feeney, J. L. & Noller, P. (1990). Attachment style as a predictor of adult 	relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 58 (2), 281-	291. Fraley, Chris R. (2004). A Brief Overview of Adult Attachment Theory and 	Research. Retrieved 	from: http://www.psych.uiuc.edu/~rcfraley/attachment.htm Liem, J. H., & Pressler, E. J., (2005). Addressing relationship concerns in 	individual psychotherapy. (italicized) Journal of Psychotherapy 	Integration, 15(2), 186-212. Mallinikrodt, B., Gantt, D., & Coble H. (1995). Attachment patterns in 	psychotherapy relationship: Development of the client attachment 	to 	therapist scale. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 42 (3), 307-317. Monden, C. (2007). Partners in health? Exploring resemblance in health 	between partners in married and cohabiting couples. Sociology oh Health & 	Illness, 29 (3), 391-411.
References continued Overall, N. C., Simpson, J. A., Fletcher G.J., and Sibley, C. G. (2009). Regulating  	partners in intimate relationships: The costs and benefits of different 	communication strategies. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 96 	(3), 620-639. Schoebi, D. (2008). The coregulation of daily affect in marital relationships. Journal  of Family Psychology, 22 (3), 595-604. Simpson, J.A., Collins, W.A., Tran, S. & Haydon, K.C. (2007). Attachment and the 	experience and expression of emotions in romantic relationships: A 	developmental perspective. Journal of Personality and Social 	Psychology, 92(2), 355-367. Simpson, J. A., Rholes, W. S., & Phillips, D. (1996). Conflict in close 	relationships: An attachment perspective. Journal of Personality and 	Social Psychology, 71 (5), 899-914.  Simpson, J.A., Winterheld, H.A., Rholes, W.S. & Orina, M.M. (2007). Working models 	of attachment and reactions to different forms of caregiving from. 	romantic partners. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 93(3),466-	477 Stackert, Richelle A., Bursik, Krisanne. (2003). Why am I unsatisfied? Adult 	attachment style, gendered irrational relationship beliefs, and young adult 	romantic relationship satisfaction. Personality and Individual Differences, 	34, 1419-1429. Vicary, Amanda M., Fraley, Chris R. (2009). Choose your own adventure: 	Attachment dynamics in a simulated relationship. Personality Social 	Psychology Bulletin, 33(9), 1279-1291. Woodhouse, S., Schlosser, L., Crook, R., Ligiero, D., & Gelso, C. (2003). Client 	attachment to therapist: Relations to transference and client recollections 	of parental caregiving. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 50 (4), 395-408.

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Attachment Theory And Improving Relationships2.The Offical One

  • 1. Attachment Theory and Improving Relationships Danielle Cooper, Nicole Fleming, Kirsten Rowland, and Tracey Wright
  • 2. overview I. Overview of Attachment Theory (Bowlby, 1973, 1980; Feeney & Noller, 1990; Hazan & Shaver, 1987; Fraley, 2004) II. Attachment Assessment (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991) III. The Four Attachment Styles IV. Role-Play Workshop
  • 3. Attachment styles Secure Anxious-preoccupied Dismissive-avoidant Fearful-avoidant
  • 4. Secure Style A - “It is easy for me to become emotionally close to others. I am comfortable depending on them and having them depend on me. I don’t worry about being alone or having others not accept me.” (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991)
  • 5. Secure Low avoidance, low anxiety (Fraley, 2004) Children experienced caregivers who were nurturing and caring (Egeci, 2006) Shows more initiated levels of self-disclosure (Egeci, 2006) Has positive views of themselves and others (Bippus, 2003)
  • 7. Anxious-Preoccupied Style C - “I want to be completely emotionally intimate with others, but I often find that others are reluctant to get as close as I would like. I am uncomfortable being without close relationships, but I sometimes worry that others don’t value me as much as I value them.” (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991)
  • 8. Anxious-Preoccupied Low, avoidance, high anxiety (Fraley, 2004) May not feel loved completely; Easily frustrated  or angered when attachment needs unmet (Fraley, 2004). Negative childhood experiences (Simpson, Winterheld, Rholes & Orina,2007) More responsive to emotional care-giving(Simpson, Winterheld, Rholes & Orina,2007) Strongly motivated to experience "felt“ security (Simpson, Collins, Tran, Haydon, 2007) Expressed dependence and desire for commitment in relationships (Feeney & Noller, 1990)
  • 10. Dismissive-Avoidant Style D - “I am comfortable without close emotional relationships. It is very important to me to feel independent and self-sufficient, and I prefer not to depend on others or have others depend on me.” (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991)
  • 11. Dismissive-Avoidant Low anxiety, high avoidance (Fraley, 2004) Children experienced caregivers as unreliable and unresponsive (Stackert & Bursik, 2002) Personal insecurities influence how they perceive others (Vicary & Fraley, 2009)
  • 13. Fearful-avoidant Style B -“I am uncomfortable getting close to others. I want emotionally close relationships, but I find it difficult to trust others completely, or to depend on them. I worry that I will be hurt if I allow myself to become too close to others.” (Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991)
  • 14. Fearful-Avoidant High anxiety, high avoidance (Fraley, 2004) Children experience caregivers who were distant or absent (Mallinckrodt, Coble, & Gantt, 1995) See themselves and others negatively (Woodhouse, Schlosser, Crook, Ligiero, & Gelso, 2003) Tends to minimize closeness in order to avoid rejection (Woodhouse, Schlosser, Crook, Ligiero, & Gelso, 2003)
  • 16. Secure & insecure Attachment Video Examples Couple’s Therapy 45 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8F-CCC5Y7yI&feature=PlayList&p=131E06DC6C82CABF&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=46 Therapy Session 34 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBM-kDUGs7I&feature=PlayList&p=131E06DC6C82CABF&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=34
  • 17. Dating studyby witcher & Kanoy Peace College students: N=113 Completed surveys on relationship experiences Couples videotaped discussing conflicting situations Three variables showed a significant correlation: commitment, violence, and dyadic adjustment
  • 18. Dating Study, continued Data Set – ANOVA Commitment F(3,109) = 15.42, p<.001 Violence F(3,109) = 5.79, p<.001 Dyadic Adjustment F(3, 109) = 3.99, p<.01
  • 22. ImprovingRelationships:Health Relationships can contribute to things like stress, depression, loss of self-esteem or confidence, and even physical illness (Schoebi, 2008) Partners health can have lasting consequences on their relationship, as well as physical and psychological well-being (Schoebi, 2008) Married and cohabitating partners will resemble each other in health status, either positive or negatively (Monden, 2007) When people are in a strong, committed relationship they stop engaging in risky behavior and take better care of their physical and mental health (Monden, 2007)
  • 23. Improving relationships: Couple’s Therapy Focus one specific aspect leads to greater changes (Doss, Yeow, Sevier, et. al., 2005). Individual cognitions greatly influence how emotions and behavioral interactions are expressed within relationships (Carrere, Buehlman, Gottman, et. al., 2000). Distressed couples are more likely to remember negative events vs. positive events (Carrere, Buehlman, Gottman, et. al., 2000). Therapists use a unique set of skills to help couples effectively deal with conflict within their relationships (Gottman, 1998, 1999).
  • 24. Improving Relationships: Stress Some stress is necessary in life Unmanaged chronic stress can have negative effects on physical and psychological health of an individual (Cohen, Gunthert, Farrehi, & Tolpin, 2006). Ways to Cope with Stress (Christopher, Christopher, & Shure, 2008) Exercise Yoga Meditation Qigong Mindfulness
  • 25. Improving relationships: emotional stability Simpson, Collins, Tran & Traydon, 2007 Secure Remain confident, responsive, and available Build greater intimacy Insecure Look for self-affirming strategies Suppress urges to self-regulate or internalize problems Avoidant Stress-relieving techniques Obtain and maintain interpersonal autonomy and control Anxious Avoid emotion-focused coping strategies Achieve greater “felt” security
  • 26. Improving Relationships Conflict resolution Positive and Negative strategies Accommodate (I Lose, You Win) Avoid (I Lose, You Lose) Compromise (We Both Lose, We Both Win) Compete (I Win, You Lose) Collaborate (I Win, You Win) Use of “I” statements Communication
  • 27. References Barnes, S. Brown, K. Campbell, W. Krusemark, E. & Rogger R. (2007). The Role of Mindfulness in Romantic Relationship Satisfaction and Response to relationship stress. Journal of Marriage and Family Therapy. 4(33). 482-500 Berger, Kathleen S. (2007). The Developing Person Through the Lifespan. New York, NY, US: Worth Publishers,192-197. Bippus, A., Rollin, E. (2003). Attachment Style Differences in Relational Maintenance and Conflict Behaviors: Friends' Perceptions. Communication Reports, 16(2) Calhoun, L., Cann, A., Norman, A., Welbourne, J. (2008). Attachment Styles, Conflict Styles and Humor Styles: Interrelationships and Associations with Relationship. European Journal of Personality, 22(2), pp. 131-146 Carrere, S., Buehlman, K., Gottman, J., Ruckstuhl, L., & Coan, J. (2000). Predicting Marital Stability and divorce in newlywed couples. Journal of Family Psychology, 14 (1), 42-58. Christopher, J. Christopher, S. & Shure, M. (2008). Mind-Body Medicine and the Art of Self-Care: Teaching Mindfulness to Counseling Students through Yoga, Meditation, and Qigong. Journal of Counseling & Development. 3(86) Cohen, L. Gunthert, K. Farrehi, A. & Tolpin, L. (2006). Unique Effects of Depressive Symptoms and Relationship Satisfaction on Exposure and Reactivity to Daily Romantic Relationship Stress. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology. 5(25). 565-583  
  • 28. References Continued Doss, B. D., Thum, Y. M., Sevier, M., Atkins, D. C., Christensen, A. (2005). Improving relationships: Mechanisms of change in couple therapy. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 73 (4), 624-633. Egeci, S., Gençöz, T.(2006). Factors Associated with Relationship Satisfaction. Contemporary Family Therapy: An International Journal, 28(3), 383-391 Feeney, J. L. & Noller, P. (1990). Attachment style as a predictor of adult relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 58 (2), 281- 291. Fraley, Chris R. (2004). A Brief Overview of Adult Attachment Theory and Research. Retrieved from: http://www.psych.uiuc.edu/~rcfraley/attachment.htm Liem, J. H., & Pressler, E. J., (2005). Addressing relationship concerns in individual psychotherapy. (italicized) Journal of Psychotherapy Integration, 15(2), 186-212. Mallinikrodt, B., Gantt, D., & Coble H. (1995). Attachment patterns in psychotherapy relationship: Development of the client attachment to therapist scale. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 42 (3), 307-317. Monden, C. (2007). Partners in health? Exploring resemblance in health between partners in married and cohabiting couples. Sociology oh Health & Illness, 29 (3), 391-411.
  • 29. References continued Overall, N. C., Simpson, J. A., Fletcher G.J., and Sibley, C. G. (2009). Regulating partners in intimate relationships: The costs and benefits of different communication strategies. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 96 (3), 620-639. Schoebi, D. (2008). The coregulation of daily affect in marital relationships. Journal of Family Psychology, 22 (3), 595-604. Simpson, J.A., Collins, W.A., Tran, S. & Haydon, K.C. (2007). Attachment and the experience and expression of emotions in romantic relationships: A developmental perspective. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 92(2), 355-367. Simpson, J. A., Rholes, W. S., & Phillips, D. (1996). Conflict in close relationships: An attachment perspective. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 71 (5), 899-914. Simpson, J.A., Winterheld, H.A., Rholes, W.S. & Orina, M.M. (2007). Working models of attachment and reactions to different forms of caregiving from. romantic partners. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 93(3),466- 477 Stackert, Richelle A., Bursik, Krisanne. (2003). Why am I unsatisfied? Adult attachment style, gendered irrational relationship beliefs, and young adult romantic relationship satisfaction. Personality and Individual Differences, 34, 1419-1429. Vicary, Amanda M., Fraley, Chris R. (2009). Choose your own adventure: Attachment dynamics in a simulated relationship. Personality Social Psychology Bulletin, 33(9), 1279-1291. Woodhouse, S., Schlosser, L., Crook, R., Ligiero, D., & Gelso, C. (2003). Client attachment to therapist: Relations to transference and client recollections of parental caregiving. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 50 (4), 395-408.