"Show, Don't Tell"

1. “Show, Don’t Tell”

2. “Show, Don’t Tell”
This is an old saying that means give the
readers actions, thoughts, senses, and
feelings rather than simple descriptions.
NO:
Mr. Smith was a
fat, grouchy old
man.
YES:
Mr. Smith heaved his
heavy frame out of the
armchair, and while
trying to reach for his
cane, grumbled,
“Suzan! Get yourself
over here now!”

3. “Show, Don’t Tell”
How do you do this?
Dialogueallows the reader to experience a
scene as if they were there. Dialogue can teach your
reader a great deal about character, emotion and
mood. Instead of telling the reader your mom was
angry, they can hear it for themselves:
“Justin Michael,” mom bellowed, “Get in here this
instant!”

4. “Show, Don’t Tell”
How do you do this?
Sensory Language.In order for
readers to fully experience what you’re writing about,
they need to be able to see, hear, taste, smell and
touch the world around them. Try to use language that
incorporates several senses, not just sight.
“Ugh, I hate when the sour taste of sweat drips into my
mouth during practice.”

5. “Show, Don’t Tell”
How do you do this?
Use a metaphor/simile.These
tools create an interesting or unexpected image for the
reader. If your protagonist is stealthy, you could use a
simile about a falling leaf: “She landed under the
window like a leaf that had fallen from a tree.”
“Our new puppy restlessly wandered around the
house, his nails clicking over the wood floor like tap-
dancing beetles.”

6. “Show, Don’t Tell”
How do you do this?
Be specific.Add more details to your story.
This will fill in the gaps in the reader’s understanding of
events.
NO:
Aiden went to
see a musical.
YES:
Because a friend told him that
“seeing a musical is the thing
to do in London,” Aiden found
himself standing inside the
front door of the Foxwoods
Theater…

7. Warning!
“Show, don’t tell” is NOT about adding
as many adjectives as possible to your
sentences.
NO:
Emily slowly sat on the
scratched, worn-leather
couch that was situated
in the left corner of her
tiny, sparsely-decorated
living room.
NO:
The quick brown fox
jumps over the lazy dog.

8. Warning!
Rather than saying “show, don’t tell,” we
should say this:
“Show as much as you can, tell as little
as you can.”
Why? Because it’s impossible to “show”
all the time. Sometimes, you will need to
directly tell the reader what’s on your
mind.

9. Open your class writing journal.
Date it August 21.
Title: “‘Show, Don’t Tell’ Challenge”
Activity:
I will give you a simple passage that relies too much
on “telling”. It is your job to re-write the passage to
include more elements of “show” than “tell.” We will
read and discuss your stories as a class, and we will
vote to decide which ones are the best.

10. Re-Write It:
When Victor found out that his
best friend Dan had betrayed him,
he went to Dan’s house to search
for him. He found Dan, and the
two got into a fight.

11. Criteria:
Vote for the story that:
• You find the most engaging
• Creates a vivid image in your mind
of the characters and events
• Succeeds at “showing, not telling”