Main Takeaways: - Discover the 4-step framework to brave difficult conversations that earn trust and leave you feeling empowered - Learn the secret to fostering relationships with even your staunchest critics - Gain insight into what motivates people and why they say what they say to create win-win situations with stakeholders and engineering teams

1. Braving Conversations at Work
by fmr Microsoft Sr PM
www.productschool.com

2. CERTIFICATES
Your Product Management Certificate Path
Product Executive
Certificate™
Product Leader Certificate™
Product Manager
Certificate™
WWW.PRODUCTSCHOOL.COM

3. Corporate
Training
Level up your team’s Product
Management skills

4. Free Product Management Resources
BOOKS
EVENTS
JOB PORTAL
COMMUNITIES
bit.ly/product_resources
COURSES

5. Braving Conversations at Work
Essential mindful communication tools for Product Managers to
build trust, repair relationships, and resolve interpersonal tensions

6. “
They may forget what you said,
but they will never forget how
you made them feel.
—Maya Angelou

7. 4 Steps to
Braving
Conversations
Intention
To push away or to create togetherness?
To punish or to create empathy?
Attention
Express how you feel about it.
Express why is it so important.
4 Request
Where do we go from here?
What would you like from them for you to thrive?
What are the facts vs. the stories + judgments?
What meaning did you assign?
Observations

8. This is where weʼre coming from on the inside.
Itʼs about how we speak or listen.
1
Notice your
Intentions

9. Shift Your Intentions
Tone
Attitude
Facial expression
Gestures
Body language
Selective pauses
“What a good job you did.”
What did you do differently? How you did it?
Shifted your intentions
To understand
To connect
To bring closeness
To see they are only human
SKILL · INTENTION

10. 2
Share your
Observations
An observation is concrete, specific, + neutral.
It is distinct from our stories, judgments, + the meaning we
assign, without the intention to blame or criticize.

11. “They never get their work done on time.”
“I knew I should have just done it myself in the first place.”
Neutral Observation
2
A coworker is late getting you the analytic analysis you
asked for to finish your PRD. You ended up working all night
on it.
“What a slacker, Iʼm the only one who cares around here.” Judgement, Story
Blame
Criticism, Judgement
never
slacker only one
should have
SKILL
A coworker is late getting you the analytic analysis you
asked for to finish your PRD. You ended up working all night
on it.
SKILL · OBSERVATION

12. Expressing Feelings + Needs
3
Pay inward
Attention
Allows us to regulate our emotions.
Allows us to connect to what matters most +
why we want what we.

13. Words
What’s feelings got to do with it?
Feelings
Needs
!= MET = MET
REFLECTED
INFORM

14. Needs
Listen. Reflect. Loop.
Its not that…
No, I meant…
Yah…
Thatʼs right…
What might they be feelings?
What might be their unmet need?
What is so important to them?
Words
Its sounds like…
I see that…
Iʼm wondering if…
What Iʼm hearing is…
What is underneath the words
they say?
Mindfully Listen
What you understood the other
person to be feeling + needing
Reflect Back
Let the other person agree or
clarify what they meant
Allow for Exchange
SKILL · ATTENTION
Feelings
Words

15. What is being voiced?
“I live with such idiots. Oh, by the way,
what happened to the data analysis you
were supposed to get to me yesterday?”
Why does it matter?
Feelings: We speak in ways
that reflect how we feel, even
when weʼre unaware of it.
What might be said Underlying Feelings + Needs
Anger, Resentment, Wronged
Competence, Communication, Reliability
Needs: When we know what
matters to us, we can then
authentically express it.

16. The type of communication in mindful communication
Choosing to express
YOUR feelings as a reflection
of YOUR needs
Over choosing to embed blame,
judgment, or criticism
Choosing to listen for
THEIR feelings as a reflection
of THEIR needs
Over choosing to hearing blame,
judgment, or criticism

17. 4
Make your
Request
Prepare ahead of time.
Clarifies what’s most important while
reducing anxiety with a process to respond.

18. “We all know what it’s like to stay
silent + comfortable instead of
voicing what we believe.”
—Brené Brown Ph.D. Vulnerability Researcher

19. Expressing requests
Being general doesn't set the other person for success.
What seems obvious can be relative for each person.
Being clear is being kind
Without sharing our feelings, needs, + values, requests
sounds like demands.
Expect some back + forth; Allow room for a no.
2 Requests are not demands
Contribute to confusion, disillusionment, + low moral.
Don't let what is unsaid become
the expectation + the evaluation
Being vague about my request = being nice.
People should just know (if they cared).
It's obvious, so I shouldn't need to tell them.
It's not my place to tell them.
I don’t want to sound bossy.
I can just prove my point with data.

20. Clear + Specific
Relationship outcome
"I feel overwhelmed and unprepared
when I donʼt have the analysis because I
worry, I might not have done it as expertly
or as efficiently as you.
What might be said instead Breakdown
Competence, Balance
Consideration, Communication, Trust
”I totally get that life happens. Letʼs
figure out together how we can make a
handoff that works for both of us next
week. Right now, Iʼd like to spend 30
minutes before lunch to review what I
came up; would that work for you?
Amicable
Trustworthy
Respectful
Overwhelmed, Unprepared
Your feelings + needs are expressed as
Clear + Specific requests
SKILL · REQUEST

21. 1. Notice your Intentions
• Connect + reconnect
4. Make the Request
• Know what you like instead
based on your needs + values.
• Share with curiosity + care.
Clear + Specific
SKILL
3. Pay inward Attention
• Identify your feelings.
• Use it to better understand
your needs + values.
Listen. Reflect. Loop
SKILL
2. Share the Observation
• Separate the stories +
judgements from the
observable facts.
Neutral Observation
SKILL
Shift Your Intentions
SKILL
Braving conversations with
mindful communication
creates the space for empowered
+ meaningful conversations.

22. Thank you.
IG: genaknight_
LinkedIn: Gena Knight
Website: GenaKnight.com

23. “The objective of Nonviolent Communication
is not to change people and their behavior in
order to get our way: it is to establish
relationships based on honesty and empathy,
which will eventually fulfill everyone’s needs.”
—Marshall Rosenberg Ph.D.
Founder of Nonviolent Communication + the bases for
Mindful Communication by Oren Jay

24. www.productschool.com
Part-time Product Management Training Courses
and
Corporate Training