4. HOW HAS YOUR WILLINGNESS TO TAKE RISKS
CHANGED SINCE YOU BECAME AN EXPAT?
I am now able to take
39.4 42.4 more risks
I now want to take less
risk
3 15.2 What is risk?
It hasn't changed at all
5. “GO TO
ZERO”
__________
Imagine the
worst thing
that could
happen if
you took the
risk .
Make it
realistic.
What would
you do if you
took the risk
and failed?
F i e l d s ( 2 01 1 )
12. SURROUND
YOURSELF
WITH
OTHER
RISK-
TAKERS
__________
Find other
people who
strive for self
growth.
Spend time
with people
who view life
as an
adventure.
Build your confidence-You have taken many risks in your life. -Let those be the platform from which you take your next risk. -Reflect on them. Write them down. -You took a risk by choosing to live abroad. -To make it more concrete, think about the risks you have taken just this year. -Really think about it. How did you get yourself to take the risk? -What did you learn from taking the risk? -What would have happened if you hadn’t taken the risk?Gail Blanke- Between Trapezes
-By the way, just to note 42.4% of you said that since you became an expat, you are now able to take more risks than before.-So what are those risks? -Reflect on them-Articulate them
Example- risk of isolation- if you move into a neighborhood with local people, not expats, who don’t speak your language-Write the information down. -Be very specific.What exactly will you do if that “worst case scenario” happens. Write your plan. If you have a very clear plan about what you will do if you take the risk and fail, you might feel empowered to take the risk.
-What assumptions do you make about the type of person you are?Are you the “risk-taking type” Is there a risk-taking type??-We tend to put ourselves in boxes, based on what we believe we are capable of. -This is very limiting. -When you hear yourself saying, “I am not the type to____” catch yourself and challenge that assumption.
Could be someone you don’t know or could be a family member, mentor, -Read their books, -read their blogs, -learn about how they view life, -how they approach risk, -how they learn from their mistakes-Post their quotes or stories in your home where you will see them every day
-We all have an inner critic. -We have a bird on our shoulder that criticizes every move we make. -Its purpose is to protect us but it is rooted in our childhood hurts and it is often no longer needed in a lot of situations. -Have compassion for the inner critic-Learn to recognize when it’s not helping you move forward in your life -Pay attention to the times when the inner critic is speaking the loudest.-Develop self-awareness. -Be curious about yourself.- Investigate your thoughts.-Check resources section for a post on language learners and the inner critic-Shift your thinking. Redefine success and failure. Success is taking chances
-Procrastination is not really about laziness. -It is often about fear. -We tend to procrastinate on things when we are afraid of making a mistake, they might be risky, we might be afraid that we won’t do well enough on those tasks. -Procrastination can be linked to perfectionism. Perfectionism is the feeling that if it can’t be done perfectly, it shouldn’t be done at all. For expats:- taking a language classjoining a clubapplying for a promotionvolunteering to make a presentation-If you can notice when you procrastinate, you can push yourself to move forward and take that risk. -Lack of action creates fear. Acting will lessen the fear.
Later in the webinar, we will talk about writing very specific goals, what risk would you consider a success if you could accomplish it?-For now, keep in mind that it is important to create “social” accountability. -Tell the people you care about what you are doing. -Keep them updated on your progress.Bennie Lewis, Fluent in 3 months- Create videos- saying what you will do and by whenStart a blogUpdates on facebookLetters homeYour own personal diaryNotes around your house
- I have an expat friend here from India.- He wants to quit his job and travel around the world.I asked him what is stopping him- he gave me the details about the price of the flight and the difficulties of getting a visa. I told him that if he wants to really make this happen, decide that the details are secondary and move forward from there. Decide that you will take this risk. If you go through the details too much before making the decision, you will talk yourself out of it.It is ok to take a calculated risk, but keep things in perspective.If taking this risk is important enough to you, the details shouldn’t matter.Start with the decision to take the risk, figure out the details from there
-Surround yourself with other people who also take risks and challenge themselves.-Find people who operate with a mindset of self growth, -People who look at life as an adventure and look at challenges as opportunities. -This could be a group of other expats, or local people or a mix. -Norman, were you able to find a group of people who inspired you to take risks while you were living abroad?-How can you find a group like this? Meetup.com, ….??-Distance yourself from those who hold you back
-Develop a daily ritual where you do something that centers you. -Exercise, meditation, chanting, mindfulness training-The activity should allow you to develop a sense of spaciousness in your mind and body and a sense that you will be ok if you take the risk and don’t succeed, -the sense that who you are is much more than any failure or success- you are not defined by your successes and failures-This will also help you develop self- compassion, steadiness of mind