The document is a humorous fictional piece depicting letters from executives of major healthcare IT companies to Santa Claus with Christmas wishes. It summarizes 13 letters, each asking Santa for something somewhat tongue-in-cheek or work-related such as more hospital sales, better weather, or to stop negative publicity. The letters poke fun at the executives and companies in a lighthearted way for the Christmas season.
2. At the risk of antagonizing the many HIS vendor CEOs who
have been so helpful in writing my HIS-tory series of their
firms over the past year, this week features another special
episode for the Christmas season.
To make this holiday a little merrier (and with a little inside
help from the NSA), we managed to get copies of the leading
HIS vendor executives’ private letters to Santa.
So sit back in your office chair, warm up your egg nog (or that
stale office coffee), and enjoy these somewhat “punny”
missives meant to poke a little fun at the bosses of our top 13
HIS vendors, listed by order of revenue. Hope Yule like it!
(PS - our attorney can be reached at: 800/555-1212)
3. Dear Santa,
To make this season a
Paragon of Christmases, I would like
to see a whole Series of Stars spread
across the Horizon.
Sincerely,
John Hammergren
4. Dear Mr. Claus,
To make my day this Xmas, I’d
like another epic sale the size of
IHC...
Yours truly,
Neal Patterson
5. Dear Santa,
For this Christmas, I’d sure
be interested my old job back at
Partners, in case you run across
anybody there in your travels...
Sincerely,
John Glaser
7. Santa,
Since we are based in
Chicago, the biggest help you could
be is to get those Bulls to start
beating the Bears! (on Wall Street,
that is…)
Sincerely,
Paul Black
8. Dear Mr. Claus,
Could you please help us find
a buyer for our BDM Pharmacy
Division? (…what? Oh…)
Sorry, never mind.
Sincerely,
Jan DeWitt
9. Santa,
This year, I’d like a Magic wand
so all of our Clients can be Served
on a single Release (6).
Yours,
Neal Pappalardo
10. Dear Santa,
All I want for Christmas is that our
next Opus encompasses the whole
Sphere of our ambulatory systems.
Sincerely yours,
Steve Plochoki
11. Santer,
All we’d really like this yeah is to
sell our system to just one really big
hospital for a change – say, one
that’s over 100 beds. Oh awright,
howabout one over 25 beds?
Y’all have a merry one!
Boyd Douglas
12. Dear Santa,
We’d really appreciate it if you
could make that other “HMS” in New
York change their initials.
Many thanks,
Tom Stevenson
14. Dear Mr. Claus,
Can you please find us some nice office
space in Reston, Virginia, that is located on a
street that is named something besides
“Sunset?” You see, we really have this Affinity
for making Quantim leaps forward…
Many thanks,
Jeff Bender
15. Dear Santa,
As you may know, I just moved here from
McKesson down in Atlanta. The people up here
in Minnesota are wonderful but the weather is
just dreadful. Could you possibly back off the
snow for few weeks this summer?
Many thanks,
Chris Bauleke
16. Dear Santa,
Please have Vince stop sending me any more of
these silly episodes next year – they are costing me too
many sponsors. In return, I promise I will start being a
very good boy.
Fondest regards to you and Mrs. Claus,
Yours truly,
Mr. HIStalk
