Gabriel presents a PowerPoint to Sam Winchester asking him to go out. He argues that they have compatible orientations and attractions. Gabriel lists his appealing traits like being talented, funny and attractive. Charts show how close they could be and how much Gabriel loves Sam. If they date, Gabriel proposes activities like dinner, decorating the school, and "sex things." A celebrity provides a testimonial supporting Gabriel. He pleads with Sam to go out with him in a heartfelt conclusion.

1. W SAM W
HY INCHESTER SHOULD GO OUT W/
ME
A POWERPOINT BY GABRIEL SHURLEY

2. THESIS
● we have corresponding sexual orientations (i
think.)
● i am extremely romantically attracted to you.
● i am mildly to extremely sexually attracted to
you.
● i am mildly to extremely sexually attractive.
● let's do this.

3. my appealing characteristics
PRETTY
NOT A HOBO
A MALE
POP CULTURE REFERENCES
TALENTED AS HELL
NOT LUCIFER

4. MY MANY TALENTS
● trumpet player ● actor ● A+ blogger
● comedian ● artist ● chef
well, more like chocolatier,
but you get the idea.
no, seriously. i'm funny as hell.

5. EXAMPLE OF A MALE
(i am also a male)
● these are attractive males ● but it's as close as you're
at our school going to get, you
overgrown giraffe
● no, they're not famous
● so pick the second one
aka me

6. EXAMPLES OF MY
ATTRACTIVENESS
even i would fuck me.
hot damn.

7. GETTING LAID STATISTICS
● you know it's true
● that 1 sliver is lucifer
and jess
● but jess is gone & my WITH ME
bro's a creep
WITHOUT ME
● looks like you're
stuck w/ me

8. MORE STATS
120
120
100
100
80
80
60
60
40
40
???
20 20
0 0
HOW CLOSE WE AREHOW CLOSE WE SHOULD BE HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU HOW MUCH YOU LOVE ME
how sad. :'(

9. WHAT I'LL DO
● take you out for dinner & a movie
● stuff your locker w/ butterscotch
● paint the entire school to look like baker st
● talk about feelings
● sex things
● walk 500 miles & walk 500 more just to be the man
who walked 1000 miles for you
● make lulu stop playing stairway to heaven over
loudspeakers in your room on repeat at night

10. DEFINITION OF SEX THINGS
sex things [seks things]
noun
1. not necessarily sex because i'm not about to
be forceful about it (unless you like that sort of
thing ;) ) but definitely sexy things.
2. anything that goes on between samuel
winchester and gabriel shurley.

11. PROS AND CONS
PROS CONS
making out rocks we might end up hating each
other if this ends badly
cuddling w/ tiny tricksters your dad already hates my
rocks family
we'd make the most my sexiness might overpower
gorgeous couple you
we could go on double dates how the hell are you going to
w/ whoever respond to a powerpoint?
it'd be hells of awkward to NO MORE CONS BECAUSE
reject a powerpoint WE ALL KNOW PROS
OUTWEIGH THEM

12. ADDITIONAL PROS AND CONS
i think you're p sexy. [NO MORE CONS
BECAUSE CONS ARE
SHIT]
i'd rather stare at your
gorgeous face than watch
superjail!
ok, so maybe that's a bit of
an exaggeration.
you're still sexy, btw.

13. CELEBRITY TESTEMONIAL
I'M CARVER ELLUND,
NOT-SO -FAMOUS
WRITER. I'M HERE TO
TELL yOU THAT THIS
MAN IS FAIRLy
ATTRACTIVE AND
WILL NOT STALk yOU
AND/OR STEAL yOUR
pETS.

14. IN SUMMARY
i love you, sam winchester.
please go out w/ me.
thank