2. DESCRIPTIVE PARAGRAPH
• The purpose of the paragraph is to
• DESCRIBE a place
• Supporting sentences should describe
what it looks like, what you see, hear,
feel, smell, and taste
• NOT to narrate a story
3. HORRIBLE HOTEL
• To describe a horrible hotel, you should
• Illustrate why such hotel is horrible
• Look: small, dark, dirty
• Feel: hot in summer due to no air-
conditioning, cold in winter due to no
heating
4. HORRIBLE HOTEL
• Sight: big window but terrible view,
dump site, dead trees, construction
• Sound: noises from the street, cars,
street vendors
• Smell: stuffy, smelly blanket, moldy
toilet,
5. HORRIBLE HOTEL
• What else?
• Activity: bad service, unfriendly staff,
restaurant running out of food
6. How to get
started
Introductory sentence &
Topic sentence
7. WHAT WENT WRONG?
✘Put too much information in introductory
sentence
Introductory sentence is optional
If you wish to write it, make it
relevant and short [1-2 sentences]
Do not tell a story
8. WHAT WENT WRONG?
✘Introductory sentence is awkward
✘Where is your horrible place?
✘BAD: illogical, quite awkward to be the
first sentence of the paragraph
Good: Have you ever stayed in a really
terrible hotel?
9. WHAT WENT WRONG?
✘The topic sentence is not a complete sentence
✘A horrible hotel in Pattaya >> Fragment
[incomplete sentence]
A complete sentence requires a subject
and a predicate
The horrible hotel in Pattaya charged
expensively for a poor service.
10. WHAT WENT WRONG?
✘Cliché topic sentence
✘BAD: You should
not stay in a horrible
hotel.
✘Vague topic sentence
✘BAD: This hotel is
horrible.
11. WHAT WENT WRONG?
✘Redundant [repeat
the same idea]
✘BAD: This hotel
is a terrible place for
me. It is the most
horrible place I have
ever been.
12. WHAT WENT WRONG?
✘ There is no topic sentence
✘ BAD: The hotel I stayed last month is
the most horrible because the rooms
are small, dark, and dirty.
The topic sentence mentions the MAIN
IDEA, NOT the details.
13. HOW TO CORRECT IT
Be specific: which hotel, how do you feel?
GOOD: The hotel where I went last
summer gave me a dreadful
experience.
GOOD: It is quite a mistake to stay in
that old hotel in Pattaya.
14. HOW TO WRITE A TOPIC SENTENCE
• Mention the topic
• Topic: the hotel where you stayed
• Opinion: that hotel was extremely
horrible/you wish you had never been
there
• Topic sentence
• The hotel I went last year was such a
nightmare.
15. How to write a topic sentence
Passage 1
• Topic: rules to save water in the summer
• Opinion: alleviating the difficult situation
• The new rules to save water in the
summer was meant to get us through the
difficult time.
16. How to write a topic sentence
Passage 2
• Topic: Nancy’s effort to become a nurse
• Opinion: she was eager to do many things
• Nancy put a lot of effort to make herself
ready to become a nurse.
17. How to write a topic sentence
Passage 3
• Topic: many facilities in big cities
• Opinion: they are advantageous
• Big cities are attractive in offering various
facilities to their residents.
19. HOW TO WRITE SUPPORTING SENTENCES
• Describe the place
• What do you see? Can you describe it
so that those who are not there can
picture it, as well?
• How do you feel about the place? Does
it help you feel peaceful, relaxed, or
happy?
• What do you hear, smell, taste?
20. WHAT WENT WRONG?
✘ Incoherence
✘ Description does not support the topic
sentence
✘ BAD: I cannot sleep all night because I have
allergy.
WHY:How is it relevant to the horrible hotel?
You need to establish that the hotel was so
dusty that your allergy aggravated.
21. WHAT WENT WRONG?
✘ Lack of organization
✘ BAD: The rooms are too small. It
happened when I went to this hotel last
year.
WHY: The content lacks coherence and
organization. The second sentence should
NOT come after the description of the
room.
24. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
• Part of speech
• Wrong:The rooms are booked full.
• Right: The rooms are fully booked.
• Wrong: The rooms are very old and
badly.
• Right: The rooms are very old and in bad
condition.
25. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
• Verb to be
• Passive voice
• The hotel is located on a main street.
• Do not use verb to be with a verb unless
it is a passive voice
• Wrong: It’s made me feel frightened.
26. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
• Verb to be
• Followed by a complement [adj/n]
• I was very frightened. [adj]
• She was a receptionist. [n.]
36. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
• Subject
• noun, pronoun can be subject
• When a noun/pronoun comes after a
preposition, it cannot function as a subject. It
becomes modifier.
37. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
• Subject
• noun, pronoun can be subject
• When a noun/pronoun comes after a
preposition, it cannot function as a subject. It
becomes modifier.
✘ Wrong: Around the hotel don’t have any
trees.
38. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
• Subject
• noun, pronoun can be subject
• When a noun/pronoun comes after a
preposition, it cannot function as a subject. It
becomes modifier.
✘ Wrong: Around the hotel don’t have any
trees.
There were not any trees around the hotel.
41. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
✘ Stop applying Thai grammar in English
• Hotel garden/park benches
42. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
✘ Stop applying Thai grammar in English
• Hotel garden/park benches
✘ Wrong: In/hotel garden/have/park
benches
43. GRAMMATICAL ERROR
✘ Stop applying Thai grammar in English
• Hotel garden/park benches
✘ Wrong: In/hotel garden/have/park
benches
Right: There are park benches in the hotel
garden.
Editor's Notes
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No need for background why you end up in that hotel. Don’t narrate you went there during Pattaya Music Festival. All hotels were booked so you ended up there. It’s irrelevant in a descriptive paragraph.\n
