5. Contents
1. I Finally Found You .........................................................................15
2. I Needed You ..................................................................................17
3. The One Constant ..........................................................................19
4. I Am In Awe! ...................................................................................23
5. A Shining Star .................................................................................25
6. I’ll Let Love Into My Heart Again ...................................................29
7. Hurt And Sadness Can Work Two Ways..........................................33
8. You Are Out There Somewhere .......................................................37
9. A Testament To Our Love ...............................................................41
10. The Love We Have ..........................................................................43
11. You Found Another Attraction/Distraction .....................................47
12. Passion From The Soul ....................................................................51
13. The Path Of Our Lives....................................................................53
14. How Can I Ever Trust Again? ..........................................................57
15. To A Very Good Mother .................................................................61
16. From A Disabled Child To His/Her Parents ....................................63
17. Perceptions ......................................................................................65
18. The Love Of A Father And Son .......................................................69
19. The Right One ................................................................................73
20. The End Of Our Journey ................................................................77
7. 21. The Truth Did Set You Free ............................................................79
22. A Love Like A Dream ......................................................................81
23. You Loved Me .................................................................................83
24. When The Sea Is Calm....................................................................85
25. The Unrelinquished Sadness ...........................................................87
26. The Right Time...............................................................................89
27. I Saw You In A Vision .....................................................................93
28. You Looked Up To Me ....................................................................97
29. The World Traveler .........................................................................99
30. A New Start ..................................................................................101
31. Falling . . . Deeper And Deeper .....................................................105
32. The Nightmare .............................................................................107
33. I Felt Your Pain .............................................................................109
34. When Did Things Begin To Change? ............................................113
35. Putting The Pieces Back Together ..................................................117
36. The Day Arrived ...........................................................................121
37. Where Is It Written? ......................................................................125
38. Expressing My Love For You .........................................................129
39. A Daughter Remembers (Even Though You Were Faraway) ..........131
40. Stay As Free As You Are .................................................................135
* Denotes actual year the poem was written by the author
** Note: The author is very aware of the many punctuation marks (mainly commas) missing
from the poems. This was done purposefully, and the ones left in were to make it easier for
the reader to understand the contextual nature of a stanza or line, and the underlines of
course to make a point more emphatically. I felt that by leaving out the extra punctuation it
would allow the reader to be less interrupted, and the poem to flow as fluently as possible.
9. Dedication
Dedicated to my wonderful parents, who loved me unconditionally, and
showed me by example how to be a person with good values and a person
of worth. My incredibly supportive and loving husband, Bruce, who has
shown me what being in love really means. My five children, Shane, Seth,
Jeremy, Cody and Bethany who have given me the opportunity to know
the real meaning of unconditional love. And to my beautiful cousin, friend
and confidant, Jean, whom I appreciate so much. To them I want to express
my love and gratitude, and feel blessed to have had them in my life to be an
inspiration for this book.
A special thank you to my illustrator, Jeremy Aloysius Richthofen, and his
wife Elie, an exceptional couple who made my job much easier.
11. Preface
I wrote this book trying to address many of the types of love we encounter
in life. If you were to ask a hundred people what they feel true love is, they
would probably have a lot of the same thoughts, but I believe there would not
be one answer that was the same. We all see love for others in different ways,
but the one theme that does hold true, is that love is to feel an emptiness
in your heart when that person is not with you and you want to be able to
be with that other person more than with others. Many of my poems are
of love lost, and I wrote these because this is the reality of love for another.
We are never guaranteed “a rose garden” in any relationship, but those that
endure the test of time means that either both parties are working very hard
to make things work out or that they are “soul mates” to begin with. If they
are “soul mates”, this may give them the good fortune and possibility of not
having to deal with some of the same stresses that many other marriages and
partnerships could have. Some of my poems are of everlasting love. Love
that we feel even when we have lost a loved one through illness or tragedy,
and we continue to love them after death. Also, when we have lost a partner
because things did not work out between the two people involved. I feel that
anyone who finds what they feel is “true love”, is so very fortunate as I said
in one poem because some of us never ever find it. These poems were not
written from life experience as much as they were on what I feel others have
had to go through in relationships. I want to touch other people’s hearts and
have them feel that they are not alone, and if a poem “speaks” to them, I
have accomplished my purpose by writing this book. Many people may find
solace in one or more of these poems, if they are still in love with someone
who has passed over, or who is inaccessible to them at this point in time.
The love we have for our children, of course is different, and I wanted to
include this in order to address mothers and fathers, young and old. This
type of love should be unconditional and last all our lives as their parents.
Some parents feel that when their children turn a certain age, and they are
no longer responsible for them by law, that their caring for them as they have
in the past stops there. I feel that your children are your responsibility
11
13. Everlasting Love
all your life. You should be there for them whenever they need you, and
help and support them the best that you can no matter how old they are.
When they marry you should be a presence, but not one that interferes
with their marriage. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t listen to them, but to
make decisions for their marriage is up to them and their partner.
I hope that I have been able to be as inclusive as possible with the types of
love that we may encounter in our everyday lives, and I hope that I have
touched the hearts of my readers in a positive way, even if a poem brings
tears to their eyes. I feel we have to have experienced pain and sorrow in
order to be able to know the joy that comes from so many kinds of love.
I send my love out to my readers, and as I said above, I hope I have also
touched your hearts.
13
15. Everlasting Love
I Finally Found You
I’ve been waiting all my life
To find someone just like you
To fill my days and nights with love
To find a love so true
I’m sitting by my window
Just waiting your return
And knowing all the time I wait
Like me, your heart does yearn
We’ve built a solid foundation
One that just can’t be thrown aside
And one that will withstand
All the things love must abide
I’m so happy that you love me
And that I can return this same love to you
And to find each other at this time
Is something we both are so overdue
We just happen to be two of the fortunate ones
Who found true love but not too late
And to know true love is so very wonderful
Especially now that we no longer have to wait
I feel we will be together
Until we are made to part
And that in itself is a tribute
To how two can share one heart.
Deborah H. Collier* 2010
15
17. Everlasting Love
I Needed You
I needed you and since I did, I found that peace had almost entirely left me
The days for me were so long and slow, and because of this, out of this rut,
I could not escape
The things we knew, our hopes our plans, were ours and ours alone
And since you weren’t in my world now, the joy in my life was not to be found
You finally came to me in a dream, a dream I had waited for, for so very long
And when you did, a joy I’d forgotten how to feel was slowly becoming so
very strong
I felt I couldn’t catch my breath, for the words you spoke went right to my soul
As you spoke it seemed so real, and for this reason I began to feel very cold
You told me that I must not wait for you, to come back any longer
This I had never been able to grasp before but now I was much stronger
You then said to me that to be with you now, was not the answer for us
You said I must let go, and promise you that I must let nature take its course
This dream had helped me to no longer fear to start feeling joy in my life
To finding relief by feeling more peace, even though you were no longer
by my side
I loved you so, your demise had hurt so very, very much—our love had
been so pure
This dream I think had three messages—to help me to let go and to go on, and
to encourage me to also try to help others to find their own closure.
Deborah H. Collier written in 1966 revised 2010
17
19. Everlasting Love
The One Constant
You are the one who brightens my day
The one constant in my life
The one who fulfills my wants and needs
The one who lessens my everyday strife
I don’t know how ever I found you
In this vast and ever-changing world
I was told it was divine intervention
And together I want us to be as we grow old
How many things had to happen
To bring us to this place
Where we can be together
In this world’s so very fast pace
We are at times somewhat different
But more often so very much alike
I feel that makes us balanced
With our likes and sometimes dislikes
It’s amazing to me that I find,
So little about you that I would change
And that you know how I feel
Without even any verbal or physical exchange
19
21. Everlasting Love
Your modesty is such
That most would never know
The depth and profoundness of your being
Which shines like a beacon in a heavy snow
I feel that I shall never find
One as loving and kind as you
To fill my days with peace and joy
In whatever we decide to do.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
21
23. Everlasting Love
I Am In Awe!
I am in awe, when you hold me,
Mold me, and enfold me,
And I melt into your arms.
I am in awe, when you allow me,
Wow me, and endow me with so
Many of your natural gifts.
I am in awe, when you astound me,
Surround me,
And send sounds to me
From the whispers of your mind.
I am in awe, when you educate me,
Evaluate me,
And elate me with your love.
I am in awe, when you caress me,
Address me, and impress me
With the kindness that you
So generously give.
I hope that we shall never have to say adieu,
Because my loving partner . . . .
I AM SO IN AWE OF YOU!
Deborah H. Collier * 2005
23
25. Everlasting Love
A Shining Star
My life was totally empty
When you left me on that day
For I could make no sense
Of the thing that took you away
I’ve searched my soul for reasons
That no sense can ever impart
For I know to try to look for sense
Would never heal this broken heart
I’ve wanted to be near you
Each and every day as I arise
But I know that it was not your fault
That we said our last good-byes
My love will always be with you
No matter where you are
I ask only that you know this
That you were and are my shining star
For you were the one I turned to
The one who always knew
How to make a day so wonderful
Just by being YOU
25
27. Everlasting Love
I now turn to those who stayed
And to God to ease this pain
But as we both know so well
This heartache will remain
Someday it may be better
I have memories that are gold
But what I really want the most
Is YOU right here to hold!
Deborah H. Collier * 2001
(Originally written as a dedication to 911 victims & their families
and also read at my Father’s funeral Dec. 2001
Also, with great sympathy to those who suffered through the devastation of
hurricane Katrina, and to those heroes who helped other people during this
incredible fight for survival.)
27
29. Everlasting Love
I’ll Let Love Into My Heart Again
I found that to shut yourself completely down
To walk through life like a piece of machinery made of steel
Eventually while it is catching up with you
You may find to feel love again helps you to heal
As they say we must know pain to know real joy
To have joy may take some people a great deal of effort for sure
And as much as we want to remain anonymous
Someone may come along that we cannot ignore
This someone was you, I started letting down my guard
Bit by bit the walls I had built were crumbling and beginning to fall
I felt this was dangerous because I was scared
As I started feeling old feelings—one after another piece fell from the wall
And you didn’t let up—you stayed with me
You began to start touching heartstrings I had for so long protected
As much as I tried to discourage you—you just weren’t inclined to give up
You just kept staying with me no matter how much I made you feel rejected
How is it that after so many years of trying to hold onto my feelings
You came into my life and turned it up side down
Because of your patience and persistence and absolute caring
I had begun to feel again—my past pains I knew I could now overcome
When had I started to become so cynical, and how long had I been this way?
So uptight when these feelings are what make us all just human
It seemed that no matter how hard I tried
I knew that by running away from everything was just a pitiful reason
29
31. Everlasting Love
Most people need others to turn to when things are going wrong
We need others to let us know we have a unique purpose
When all I could do was shut all the doors to my heart
I began to realize that what hurt me, could have been much worse
At times no matter how badly we’ve been hurt and try to hide from the world
There is usually someone who comes into our lives and in just a short time
Helps us break away a truckload of walls we’ve been so carefully building
And then we can begin to regain faith in love, and everything begins to shine
I set myself up for heartache, so very many times, and felt that it was all
my fault
I know now that it wasn’t, as there are no guarantees, since real life is not
that way at all
Thank you so much for not giving up on me, for this is what has helped
me to see
That opening your heart to others is the thing to do and in love again I
could fall.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
31
33. Everlasting Love
Hurt And Sadness
Can Work Two Ways
I walked into the park one day
And saw a young girl crying on a bench nearby
I asked her if she would like someone to talk to
And she answered yes while she still cried
She continued to cry
The tears flowed as she spoke
I told her she could tell me what was wrong
Because my trust she certainly could invoke
She explained that when she and her boyfriend
Were at home night before last
That the evening was the same
As it always had been in the past
She said when they awakened
He was totally aloof, and said he didn’t want to talk
And this was completely unlike him
Because from casual conversation he had never balked
She told me he was the most beautiful man
She had ever known, and their love had been sublime
And I knew these words were from her heart
Because out of the tears her face suddenly began to shine
She told me that she loved him more
Than anyone could ever understand
And they had talked so many times of
A life together they had planned
33
35. Everlasting Love
The morning that she spoke of,
Had changed her whole world of dreams
For he confessed he thought he’d never really loved her
And they could no longer be a team
My heart plummeted for her as she told me this
For I had had a similar experience, a relationship that ceased
I told her she should grieve as long as she needed to
And time would eventually work in her favor to give her needed peace
It’s difficult to console someone
Who has just had such a terrible shock
But I’ve found through the hurt I’ve encountered
As much as you would like to, you can never turn back the clock
Some people go through tragedies
That make them so bitter, they never seem to mend
But there are others who have turned their hurt into strength
And this has helped them to become stronger and better in the end.
Deborah H. Collier * 2007
35
37. Everlasting Love
You Are Out There Somewhere
Come to me
In our every changing destinies
I know we must be
Side by side
I feel the warmth of your spirit within me
And know we will be so complete when
We meet
You’re out there just waiting
As I am right here
I just hope that you can hear me
I want only you
Even though we’ve never met
I know that in time
It seems destined that we will
But it’s difficult being
So close and yet so far
Because I know you are close
Let me know where you are
Send some sign to my door
Let me know if you can hear me please
I know we will meet
Only time stands in the way
And all these precious moments
We could be spending together now
37
39. Everlasting Love
Someday you’ll appear
In a crowd, on a street
I’ll know you when I see you
Never will this wanting, waiting
And knowing, wane
Please look for me also
In time we will be together, I have no doubt of this
And I feel the love we could have
Could be beyond anyone’s imagining.
Deborah H. Collier * 1997
39
41. Everlasting Love
A Testament To Our Love
I love the way you hold me
And then kiss me
The synapses of my brain run rampant
Like the bulls in the Spanish bull run
I can’t breathe sometimes
I can’t think
I can only feel wispy nonsensical
Images rushing through my mind
Your lips on mine
The pounding of your heart beating
In rhythm with mine
Your hands on my waist
Pulling me closer and closer
And in those moments the world
Is only you and me
I love you so very much
Please let me live in this world
With you for as long as I can
By your side always.
Deborah H. Collier * 2006
41
43. Everlasting Love
The Love We Have
The love we have
Is so precious and rare
A treasure I believe
That will go on forever
We know this love, even in our dreams
And I thank God everyday as I awake to you every morning
We find it difficult to put our feelings into words
For this reality is beyond even our most incredible imaginings
How very fortunate we are, to have found true love
And to have so much hope of keeping it forever,
Some people are just never able to find it
No matter how much they pursue this endeavor
They say you’ll know
When your love is truly real
And this I found to be a truth with you
With a bond our love was sealed
Sometimes I feel so good about us
But then it truly frightens me,
To think how I could go on without you by my side
I’m not prepared to think this way, this I cannot see
You are not only my true love
But my best friend of course
And I can tell you so many very private things
A line with others I have seldom crossed
43
45. Everlasting Love
Thank you again so much for all your love
And also for believing in me
It’s uncanny how you seem to know
What to say to make me so very happy
God bless you my darling, for helping me open places in my heart
And to the parts of my emotions toward the world, my back I had turned
For you have shown me not only how to love
But you’ve shown me how to be loved in return.
Deborah H. Collier * 2002
45
47. Everlasting Love
You Found Another Attraction/
Distraction
The feelings that I had for you
Made me blindsided to your actions
And even though I thought I knew you well
Right under my nose you found another attraction
You said you wanted to be with me
Not only day but night
And that our love was like a dream
A dream that was so right
How did I miss the clues to know
That you had found another
I look back now and still can’t see
How I just became a bother
Of the many things I now know
We definitely should have discussed
The terrible things you were dreaming in nightmares,
But you said they had nothing to do with us
You did tell me about visions
You were experiencing from a war long passed
And maybe you wanted someone to rescue you
From the demons that seemed to last
Your quiet demure was who you seemed to be
But you were actually a man of deceivable unrest
So how was I to even know or comprehend
How inside you were so extremely distressed
47
49. Everlasting Love
You’d also told me you were ecstatic to find someone like me
But I realize now how needy you were, and in your haste to find a cure
And someone just to rescue you, you never saw who I really was
In your chaotic thoughts I had actually become only a lure
I watched you as you looked outside
From the window by the bay
Never knowing how much pain you felt
Until later on that day
This all came to me as such a shock
As I was the person you said was a dream come true
And here I was believing you, I don’t understand
How people fall in and out of love as if it’s just something to do
But I’ve learned not to dwell on things that make no sense
It’s only a waste of energy
If someone decides they don’t want you, go on with your life
Because that love just wasn’t meant to be.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
49
51. Everlasting Love
Passion From The Soul
Completely undone and every nerve-ending
You've touched goes to the very depth of my heart
This passion we have is so very much alive
And cannot be conscious to us at this moment
Until emotions begin to impart
We are left with only our basic longings
And this is where we can understand that
In our deepest feelings we know we belong together
I hold onto you and we feel such happiness
In a foam-filled pool of insatiable
And abundant unstoppable loving
We never knew could be so immeasurable
Until now we could only imagine the extent true love
Could affect us until we had absolutely found it
This feeling of overdue passion is so new
That we could never explain it in all its bliss.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
51
53. Everlasting Love
The Path Of Our Lives
We’re all on an incredible journey
One given to us by design
And we find as we walk down this unknown path
That our lessons accumulate and combine
But my thoughts are that a reason is given
That a specific purpose we possess
We are needed to use the talents given to us
Those with which we’ve been blessed
Fulfilling this purpose before our time is up
May be the reason we continue to stay
And to know we have a specific purpose may
Help us to make the most of each and every day
We’re in a strange place without a past
When we come into this world
But I believe if we enhance our life with zeal
Many mysteries will unfurl
As we go along we find that
Harsh times may come our way
But we also find that faith can mend
So many disappointments and dismays
The things that hurt us intensely
The things that are now long past
Seem somewhat dreamlike as we go on
The intensity seldom lasts
53
55. Everlasting Love
We all face that question
Of “Why am I here?”
“Why was I chosen to live on this earth?”
Then the thought just disappears
The question will always intrigue us
And we can try to make sense if we choose
But if we believe this is a one time thing
Then we must make the choice to win or lose
Remember that life is fleeting and every moment counts
And that opportunity to do good can be found in many incidents
So if we make the right choices and great contributions to our world
We may help the next generation to continue to do good with great perseverance.
Deborah H. Collier * 2003
55
57. Everlasting Love
How Can I Ever Trust Again?
You were standing there
And you could see my pain
And then the heaven’s opened
And my tears blended with the rain
I couldn’t believe what you were saying
And I didn’t want to hear
Out of the blue these incredible words
Did you say you didn’t care?
No, no it can’t be true
These words you spoke just now
Because we were so good together
This just can’t be somehow
Please don’t stand there and watch me cry
This pain inside is just too intense
I felt that on your love I could always depend
This just doesn’t make any sense
You said how much you loved me
And that our love was so surreal
Then why this sudden change of heart?
This must be just a dream
Never in a million years
Would I have ever imagined this
Or thought this could have ever happened
You made me believe you were in total bliss
57
59. Everlasting Love
How do you make another
Feel so loved and so very cared for
So much the only one for you
And then on love just close the door?
I'm so confused, please help me
To understand your heart
How can I ever trust again?
And my love be able to impart?
It all comes down to one thing
One thing I now so clearly see
You wanted to be in love with love so much
You fooled us both completely.
Deborah H. Collier * 2002
59
61. Everlasting Love
To A Very Good Mother
You gave me a chance to have a life and
I am so grateful and blessed to be alive
I am now able to see how the basic values you instilled in me
Have helped me to give my own children a chance to thrive
You worked so very hard and I know today
You did this with so much love for us in your heart
And I have done the same for my children
For your example helped me to get them off to a really good start
You are a Mother, who selflessly tried so very, very hard
To fix the things that most people would feel could never be resolved
But you relentlessly tried to find a way in spite of obstacles
To work out these things anyway because you felt they must be solved
You made my life much fuller, just by being with me
As much as you could each and every day
And to this day I could never thank you for all you’ve done
For there would never be enough words for what I need to say
Even so, I want to tell you
That my love for you runs very deep
And I want you to know that all the love you have given me,
Will be one of the most valuable and cherished things that I will keep
God Bless You MOM and Thanks Again,
For whether in person or in your heart, you were always there for me
And I know now how fortunate I was to have a Mother like you
Who gave her all to be the best she could be.
Deborah H. Collier * 2006
(Dedicated to my Mom who had to be both Mother and Father for so many years.)
61
63. Everlasting Love
From A Disabled Child
To His/Her Parents
I didn’t ask for this pain
I didn’t ask for this life
It was given to me and to you
And now we must try to accept it
Not just to accept me, but accept my illness
Accept that I may never be able to do certain things
Accept that you will be asked to work with me
To comfort me, to protect me
If you water a garden it grows
If you encourage my spirit I will grow
If you harden your heart I will wither
Love me and believe in me and I will blossom
I am really just like you in so many ways
I was born with flesh, blood, and bones
I have feelings and they can be hurt
I have desires and dreams that I want to achieve
If you can treat me just like any other child
This will allow me to become who I really am
And then any obstacle that I may encounter
Will be so much easier to overcome.
Deborah H. Collier * 2001
63
65. Everlasting Love
Perceptions
I find that many people in the world
Have all begun to lose control
Of all the things that kept them together
From the time they were very small
Some argue the question
Of why we are here at all
And if we don’t keep our perspective
We’ll find we’re up against a wall
We can’t dwell on things that we can’t change
Or on things gone bad when we’ve given our best
To do that is to stop to grow
And maybe never again be able to rest
To find a place where we can exist
And know we can be calm
We must be ready for things unknown
Love who we are, be prepared and be strong
We can never ever be perfect
No matter how hard we try
So we must take time to realize this
And not give up and on the inside die
65
67. Everlasting Love
Many of us think we are
Just the things that we do
Like mother, teacher, engineer
But this just isn’t true
We are all just the people that we are
The person who’s inside
Our goodness and uniqueness
We must not put aside
Once we’ve come to this perception
Of the essence of our soul
We find that our outward “who we are selves”
Can be enhanced within us to behold
Who we say we are and who we are
Are sometimes two entirely different things
And wouldn’t it be refreshing to hear
Someone say “I’m just a human being”?
Deborah H. Collier * 2005
67
69. Everlasting Love
The Love Of A Father And Son
My son looked up at me today
Tears streaming down his cheeks
I asked him what was wrong
And he started acting so very meek
It’s hard to be a caring parent
And see your little ones in distress
So I made sure that he was physically alright
And then asked him why he was upset
He said some of the kids in school today
Had been mean to him and this had made him very sad
He said he was trying to take up for the new kid
And this made his friends really mad
I told him how kind he’d been to take up for someone new
And complimented him on knowing just how he should act
I’m sure he remembered how he felt when our family had moved
When he’d been new he’d learned a responsible way to react
Because he remembered how it had felt
And knew enough about putting himself in this boy’s place
The hurtful things the other kids were saying to this new friend
Was something he didn’t want his new friend to have to face
I told him he’d done the right thing, and how very proud I was
And I remembered reading a short quote about staying strong,
To always do what you know is right regardless
And do what you believe in even if you are the only one
69
71. Everlasting Love
I don’t know how much those words helped him
But I did remember how it had made me feel
When other kids had teased me when I was doing the right thing
It still had taken a real toll and took me quite a while to heal
When we are raising any child, we should always keep in mind
Whether they are right or wrong, to sit down with them and to reason
Because childhood goes by so quickly, try to always be there for them
This helps them to be more secure, and to become a better person.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
71
73. Everlasting Love
The Right One
My life had been so difficult
The crises never seemed to end
But then I did not realize what was
Right around the bend
My life was going to take a turn
I never would have guessed
A wonderful change was taking place
My life would again be blessed
I prayed that God would send me
A person who loved Him too
A gentle person who could see in me
The things that were so true
A person whom I could depend on
To love me just for me
And didn’t want to change my ways
My goodness they would see
If I could find a person like this
Someone who would let me just be me
Then I would want to do for them
Even more than they would do for me
73
75. Everlasting Love
This miracle finally happened
In a most unusual way
For many events had to take place
To bring about this day
The person that I was looking for
I met soon after I had prayed
And now after being together for many years
I still feel just as blessed as I did on the very first day.
Deborah H. Collier * 2000
75
77. Everlasting Love
The End Of Our Journey
My world came tumbling down that day
The day we said goodbye
We knew that it would never work
We’d done all that we could to try
You took me in your arms so warm
And we had our last embrace
And all that I could see right then
Was the sorrow on your face
Do you think we did the right thing?
To end this bond we’d had
Do you think we bore poor judgment?
This ending was so sad
Maybe we’ll never know these answers
And we shouldn’t second guess
Because we can always hold onto the fact
That we sincerely gave it our best
You know I’ll never forget you
For you know there never could be
A better friend to fill my life
A friend who taught me to just be me
I can’t thank you enough for all you gave
For all the kindness on your part
And even though things just didn’t work out
You’ll always have a special place in my heart.
Deborah H. Collier * 2001
77
79. Everlasting Love
The Truth Did Set You Free
It’s difficult to discover
The needs of another
Are all hidden below vast layers of their past
Which they have kept covered
You reach out to help them
Knowing only some of the places they have been
But not knowing the deep things
Which they keep so secretive and close within
The layers must be peeled away
To reach them it is the only way
You give all of your all to find the key
To gently ask things that will not make them flee
You finally make some progress
The answers are only surface at first
You so much want to help them
Because below all these layers lies a gem
Finally they begin to tell you
Of the things they’ve kept so hidden
And you knew all this time it would hurt you
But to give them all your love was what you could do
When these many layers are peeled away
And your love helped you to find a way
To give this person who was to you a rarity
A way to finally find their way to their needed clarity.
Deborah H. Collier * 2006
79
81. Everlasting Love
A Love Like A Dream
The love we had
Was beyond anything I ever imagined
The love we all dream of and hope for
But can’t believe it has finally really happened
I lived this dream in the real world
Everyday in awe of how true love really felt
Thinking that this feeling could never end
Just being with you made my heart truly melt
I wanted to be with you ’til the end of time
This love was so intense and so very strong
And I felt it was invincible to any change
But if I’d been less blinded I would have seen I was wrong
Life has a way of taking strange turns
Of taking away when we’re not ready to give
But I believe to have this true love even once in your lifetime
Makes it a complete life that you’ve lived.
Deborah H. Collier * 1966
81
83. Everlasting Love
You Loved Me
You loved me for what I was then
Not for who I wanted to be
Not for who I was going to be
And not for who I was before I met you
Your eyes shone with admiration
For my every step, my every word
My dreams were always within you
For you and I belonged in the same world
Ideas would unfold before us
Like blossoming flowers
For I enjoyed your thoughts and you mine
For together was the only way we could plan
As it was, dreams brought us together
And dreams of a future together kept us there
Because within this realm of happiness
We found very few things we couldn’t share.
Deborah H. Collier * written in 1966—revised in 2010
83
85. Everlasting Love
When The Sea Is Calm
When the sea is calm and the moon lays low
We know we can begin to soothe our souls
We can’t look away, for away would be wrong
We must continue to envelope the steadiness
That has begun to engulf our spirit and consciousness
To pretend, is to stay a slave to convention in our passions
So we must let our wings come forth, and soar as high
As the heavens will take us.
Deborah H. Collier * 1966
85
87. Everlasting Love
The Unrelinquished Sadness
I thought of us the other night
The good times and the bad
I began to think how things could have been
Had you not been so very, very sad
Your sadness had lingered for so long
From an adolescent age
And every time you thought you’d healed
It seemed as if you were still in a maze
I told you that you had to face
The fears that held you back
To be able to find the good you truly deserved
For you’d always had the things you thought you’d lacked
I tried so very hard to make you see
My love for you was true
But in order to ever make love work at all
The one you have to love first is always you.
Deborah H. Collier * 2003
87
89. Everlasting Love
The Right Time
Come to me
In our every changing destinies
I know we must be
Side by side
I feel the warmth of your spirit within me
and know we will be so complete when
we meet
You’re out there just waiting
As I am right here
I just hope that you hear me
I want only you
Even though we’ve never met
I know that in time
We will meet
But it’s difficult being
So close and yet so far
Because I know you are out there
Let me know where you are
Send some sign to my door
Let me know you can hear me please
I know we will meet
Only time stands in the way
And all these precious moments we could
be spending now
89
91. Everlasting Love
Someday you’ll appear
In a crowd, or just on any street
I’ll know you when I see you
Never will this wanting, waiting,
And knowing, wane
Please look for me also
In time we will be together
I have no doubt of this, and I feel that
The love we could have is unimaginable.
Deborah H. Collier * 2005
91
93. Everlasting Love
I Saw You In A Vision
I saw you in a vision
Just the other night
You said that you were doing fine
You said you were alright
I never questioned why you came
You needn’t speak for me to know
Your words were there as clear as day
As I could feel them through the glow
You were not dressed in white
As so many visions are
But came only as a shadow
To speak to me from afar
After you said that you were fine
And that where you were things were very bright
Your thoughts came through without a voice
It was like a second sight
You let me know that where you were
A place where the waters were always crystal blue
You only wanted to make me aware
That someday you wanted me to be with you
My time on earth was fleeting
And I must know just where I stood
In the vastness of the universe
There was only one true good
93
95. Everlasting Love
I must know my God more fervently
Understand His few requests
To believe as He had instructed
And to follow would come the rest
I knew exactly what you meant
I had fallen short
And there was only one thing to do
Just one and only one resort
I saw you leave as you had come
Your message had been so clear
That I was to follow a stronger course
In the things I held so dear
God had been calling me to worship
For such a very long time
Why hadn’t I listened to Him so long ago?
My excuses to me had been fine
I felt sure I’d still get into heaven
Even though I didn’t go to His House to worship
But one day it finally hit me
How very long God had with me been patient
For this reason and many more
I began to change my course
To worship in the House of God
Otherwise, I felt I would have so very much remorse.
Deborah H. Collier * 2004
95
97. Everlasting Love
You Looked Up To Me
You looked up to me, to tell you right from wrong
But I did nothing
You looked up to me, to help you to be strong
But I did nothing
You looked up to me, to help you find the one
But I did nothing
You looked up to me, and when I came to help
You were gone.
Deborah H. Collier * 1966
97
99. Everlasting Love
The World Traveler
So you’re out there in this great big world
With so many things to see
So many new things to embrace
Who knows where next you’ll be
You’ve found your wings to take you higher
To reach for the moon as always
And in your quest you’ll see such wonders
You might feel there are never enough days
You’ve gone from being a quiet unassuming little child
And evolved and now have such a confidence
That you’re able to keep up with all you’ve had to accomplish
And when any crisis comes your way you’ve proven your resistance
You’ve found your niche in seeing other lands
With each place another incredible view
With each new step more commitment to explore
And a multitude of new things to do
I’m happy for your new found love
Which is wanting to find out what is waiting in other lands
And I hope you will be able to find all you desire
And that you will always be led by God’s hands.
Deborah H. Collier* 2009
(DEDICATED TO MY TWO OLDEST SONS, SHANE AND SETH, WHO ARE TRAVELING THE
WORLD TEACHING ENGLISH IN OTHER COUNTRIES AS CIVILIANS)
99
101. Everlasting Love
A New Start
What happened to us?
What came in the way?
Or was it that there were things
We should have said, but just didn’t say?
I’m totally confused
But I feel I’m to blame
Because I didn’t give all of myself
To a person who did truly love me just the same
The signs were all there
Just staring at me
But my heart was oblivious
To a love that was a fantasy
I kept going on as if there was
Nothing more to fear
But I found that as days went by
Events began to bring me to tears
I wanted our love to be fantastic
So I let all the red flags slip by
We should have been communicating
But instead all I could do was hide and cry
101
103. Everlasting Love
I don’t think we can ever get back
The type of love we once had
But I do believe in trying to repair
The things that have made us both sad
Will you work with me and communicate?
We can talk about how we again can find a way
To be together forever, because all I really want
Is to be with you until the end of our days.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
103
105. Everlasting Love
Falling . . . Deeper And Deeper
Completely and unbridling
You’ve touched the deepest parts of my heart
Deeper and deeper as I plunge
Into the abyss of our love, down . . . down
As I am falling I am collecting wisps of
Far-reaching ecstasy in my soul,
Knowing you’re feeling the same
Sharing with me all of you
This is where I take your hand and
Bask with you in an infallible, abundant
Pool of happiness . . . How could we know
How true love could affect us until now.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
105
107. Everlasting Love
The Nightmare
This truly is a nightmare
Surreal, chaotic, and the blood
In my veins has turned to ice
Something, I’ve never before experienced
Oh, you had me so blindsided by those
Mystifying and beautiful eyes, always gazing at me
With unbeknownst superficial love
And I bought it
All I see now is a cold, calculating, miserable soul
Again in search of someone else to wrap in deceit
Another vulnerable one is out there somewhere
And I pray they will be shielded from you and your madness
Let them see sooner than later that the monster
In you is lurking, waiting for its prey
The innocent and kind may be at your mercy
But there must be at least one whose intuitiveness alerts them early
When this happens, you will be found out before it’s too late
Before there is no turning back from your definite demise
You will be confused as to why you are not feeling the usual
Pleasure from one of your triumphs, of hurting and deceiving another
How pitiful you are, and I hope there will never have to be
Another innocent and trusting prey for you to try and deceive,
But if there is, I hope with all the hope in me
The real you will be discovered in time, next time.
Deborah H. Collier * 2004 revised slightly in 2010
107
109. Everlasting Love
I Felt Your Pain
I took a walk through the park one day
And I saw you sitting there
I could tell by your expression
That you were in despair
I walked over to where you sat
And I thought I could hear your heart beat
When I asked if I could help you
You looked away and began to weep
You said that they were your only family
And this was why you were completely alone now
I wanted to hold you in my arms
And take all your pain away somehow
You told me your story
And how this life can be so strange
How you may think all is totally fine
And in a split second all can change
You told me how your parents
A year ago this day
Were traveling by car
On their way with you to stay
They ran into bad weather
The road very winding
You’d lost them on that day
Since then your life had been spiraling
109
111. Everlasting Love
You said that you were one of only two children
But your sister had died and she was your twin
And naturally then being the only child
To your parents you became everything
They’d never wanted you too far from their side
Even as you became an adult
When their over-protectiveness became unhealthy
You gently told them that to live so close you found too difficult
I listened for a very long time
And as I left you I realized
That we cross paths with others sometimes
Just to bring some happiness where there is pain.
Deborah H. Collier * 2003
111
113. Everlasting Love
When Did Things Begin To Change?
I can’t remember when things began to change
When we became like strangers
I only know that it has happened
And our love is now in danger
We’ve had so many good times
As so much time has passed
But nothing is ever guaranteed,
And many things just don’t last
I’ve racked my brain for that turning point
When things went all awry
And as I contemplate our love
The tears come to my eyes
I want things to be the way they were
But things just never are
Because change is so essential
And sometimes people can’t change for fear
Do you think we can ever get it back,
The things that made us click?
Or do you feel there is no hope,
To feel real love and not just mimic it?
113
115. Everlasting Love
I want to be with you forever
This has never changed
But we have to be honest in all we do
And not feel it’s all arranged
If you are willing to make this happen
Then I will be there too
And maybe, just maybe, we may find
A different love, but one that is just as true.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
115
117. Everlasting Love
Putting The Pieces Back Together
Sing me a love song, sing it so it soothes
The things that I feel are unspoken
And I think these are the same things
That make me sometimes feel so broken
I know times haven’t been easy
For you and me it’s true
But we did think one thing was for sure
That love would get us through
Falling through a maze, a haze, in a daze
And everything is blurred
As I try to put the pieces back together
The way they always were
I used to feel like a broken-winged dove
Just falling and falling through space
While still totally in love I had to try to remove despair
And then try to put solace in its’ place
Love is like a puzzle, the pieces should fit tightly
And when this puzzle is disturbed the pieces do not fit right
I think we can begin to put them back as tightly as they were
Hoping that the flame of being in love we may be able to reignite
I believe we are all here for a specific purpose and I also believe
That God gave each of us the yearning of our other half to meet
For with a match that has very little connection
We may find we will never feel complete
117
119. Everlasting Love
You have helped me greatly within
To begin to restore the things of emptiness
You’ve made things so much easier for me
I love you so much for your unselfishness
I find that because of you
I now see how these pieces can be restored
And you’ve also helped me to know through all this
That I AM the one that you adore.
And yes, now like the Phoenix, I will fly out of the ashes and will again
be able to SOAR!!!!
Deborah H. Collier * written between 1999 and 2009 rewritten in 2010
119
121. Everlasting Love
The Day Arrived
She sat on the steps In the front of her house
Watching her oldest child drive away
As she watched him from a distance
She knew that there was nothing more she could say
She realized that now her life had been changed
And for this she began to grieve
She had been very quiet while the last bags were packed
And she knew her love for her child would always be there to retrieve
She hugged her child so very tightly
As if this would be the last time she would for a while
Her child returned her love with a sweet kiss on her forehead
She tried to hold back the tears all along maintaining a smile
Their relationship had been wonderful
Yet she knew he must go
To fulfill his independence
Which she knew on every child we should bestow
She knew it was time that she let go
Her heart was breaking more than he knew
And the tears began to well in her eyes
As she knew there was nothing more she could do
“I’m not going forever”, to console her he had said
“And I won’t be far away”, he could see she was in pain
“I’ll come home whenever I can”, he said to her then
She knew she couldn’t hold him to this, and it began to rain
121
123. Everlasting Love
As time went by she realized so many other things
How grateful she should be that he wanted independence
And this helped her to slowly realize it was good to slowly let go
And she could still find happiness in all their mutual remembrances
Eventually she learned from other mothers
Who had also dealt with these type of situations and emotions
That she would be able to be content with and even enjoy
A long distance relationship and have the same adoration.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
(Dedicated to the memory of my dear Aunt Ruth)
123
125. Everlasting Love
Where Is It Written?
Where in the world is it written that at 20
A young person should know what they’re going to become
It seems so many young people are put in cubby holes
And to not fulfill their parents’ wishes, the parents may become undone
Of course this is not always the case, as everyone is different
But the pressure that some parents put on their young
To know so many things about their future in advance
Parents are making choices for their children that they themselves long
Don’t push them or expect too much from them
Just be grateful that you’ve been allowed to guide this little person
By example try to help them and to show them how to become good people
And to know that you didn’t fail if your intentions were always wholesome
At 20 it’s generally thought that a child should know his future
And at 30 that a career or married life with children is the way
But many parents forget that if they guide their children wisely
Many times their support and love will help their children not to stray
At forty many parents feel their children should be successful
Successfulness is relative and whatever choice they’ve made
It may not be the choice that suits us, but it’s their life not ours
In the future we may see our child fall back on the foundation that we've laid
125
127. Everlasting Love
If your child wants to be a dancer, a teacher, a writer or an artist
And so many other things even for just a month or two or more
Let them find the thing that they love the most
And give them a lot of opportunities to make it possible for them to explore
Feel so blessed if you have been able to have a child
There are so many people who can’t
For those of you who have children please realize
What an incredible privilege and blessing on you God did grant.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
(Dedicated to my other three children–Jeremy, Cody, and Bethany who have
brought so much joy into my life)
127
129. Everlasting Love
Expressing My Love For You
If I was asked to write down
How I felt about you
I think there would never be enough books
To give my love for you its due
You came into my life
When the world looked so very, very dark
And the first time that we met
I knew in my life you would be a huge part
I’ve never felt this depth of love
I’ve never felt this joy
And each morning as I awake,
You’re there, my whole being to restore
I hope that I can be to you
The way you’ve been to me, so very real
But it seems so unlikely that I could
For your love has brought me to a place surreal
To try and tell you in words how your love
And kindness have taken my breath away
And to express all these things and the depth of my love
Would take a lifetime and a day.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
129
131. Everlasting Love
A Daughter Remembers
(Even Though You Were Faraway)
You’ve always been there for me
A force that was so strong
And though I rarely saw you
I always knew that I belonged
From all the things you’d taught me
You gave me great insight
And all the choices I had to make
You were still a guiding light
I knew that you were always there
Whenever I needed your strength
But the times that I could see you
Stretched into greater length
I felt an uncanny connection
Even though you were faraway
But I always felt we had plenty of time
To see each other at times along the way
How many times we’d spoken
Of trips to visit we wanted to take
Never thinking that these trips we’d planned
You may never again be able to make
One day I received a message
That you only had a short time to live
It reminded me of all the plans we’d made
And that they were still left to be filled
131
133. Everlasting Love
How could your condition change so rapidly
A man so vibrant until that night
You even played golf the day before
But you said you had already been shown heaven’s light
Soon after they told me you only had a few hours
And probably would not make it through the day
I knew that loosing you would be a hard cross to bear
I was so grateful we’d said as much as we could possibly say
I thank God I took the time before you left
To tell you how much you really meant
To tell you I loved you each and every day
Made me feel that our last days together were well spent
When a loved one is leaving us
And they only have a short time to live
Take every chance that you can possibly find
To give them all the love you can give.
Deborah H. Collier * 2001
133
135. Everlasting Love
Stay As Free As You Are
(LYRICS FROM AN UNSUNG SONG)
Go from here to there and back again and never look behind
Take with you a piece of our life in the memories of your mind
Remember when you see me to wave as you pass by
Because if you don’t I think that I might cry
Stay as free as you are, don’t change when you’re a star
Stay as free as you are, you can do it, you know you can do it
I hope life and good friends will always treat you well
And all your friends and family with pride can swell
I know we’ll always keep in touch
Try not to hurry, please don’t rush
Stay as free as you are, don’t change when you’re a star
Stay as free as you are, you can do it, you know you can do it
You’ve got so much to experience and your whole life ahead of you
And I hope you’ll be happy and love you’ll find in all you do
Trust most people until they prove you wrong
Remember it’s so important to always have a song
Stay as free as you are, don’t change when you’re a star
Stay as free as you are, you can do it, you know you can do it
135
137. Everlasting Love
You know a song can keep you free out there
And because you know this you shouldn’t have many fears
You’re such a beautiful person, a person with such good intentions
And because of this I believe you’re someone who will often be mentioned
Stay as free as you are, don’t change when you’re a star
Stay as free as you are, you can do it, you know you can do it.
Deborah H. Collier * 2010
137