Lecture for Supervision Internship

1. Supervision Internship [401591]
Assertiveness I
Marcus Birkenkrahe [Birkenkrahe Aya]

2. Agenda
 Excerpts from the weekly forum posts...*
 [Non-] Assertiveness
 Simple methods
 Discussion
 Home work/Commitment round
Please do remember to upload your (main) forum
post to your GoogleDocs file by Monday
at the very latest!!
Agenda | Forum | Models | Discussion | Commitment HWR Berlin Supervision Internship LV 401591 / 2

3. Forum – from „What Did You Learn?“
«…In every e-mail [to Asian people] I had to pay attention that I never,
really NEVER, write something in a negative way or use the word no.
This can get pretty difficult when someone did something wrong and
you are the one who has to explain it in a positive way to him.»
«From the very first day of my internship I understood that it will be
difficult for me to go home at 18.00 as ALL employees finish their
working day not earlier than at 19.00-20.00. And some of them start
working at 7 a.m.»
«How do you say “No” if someone wants to give you a task that you
simply do not have time for?»
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4. Forum – from: “What Did You Learn?“
«It feels a little strange for me to “just” be the intern and to have such
control and corrective responsibilities over people in their work.
Especially considering that there are people who have been doing
their job for 20 years.»
«I often get tasks from the [managers] or sometimes from the clients
directly without having clear instructions on how to do it.»
«I learned that it is important to ask for what you want or need because
if you don’t, it is possible that you will miss gaining a lot of helpful
experience.»
>> What do you make of these stories?
>> Have you made any similar experiences?
Agenda | Forum | Models | Discussion | Commitment HWR Berlin Supervision Internship LV 401591 / 4

5. [Non-] Assertiveness
 Aggressive behavior – pushy, bullying, requires force
 Manipulative behavior – sly, tricky, requires cunning
 Instinctive behavior – 'fight, flight or freeze'
 Defensive behavior – replying, defending, asking
 Assertive behavior – clear, adult, requires boundaries
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6. Assertive behaviors
The point of all assertive techniques is to let the other
person know (a) where your boundary is, (b) if anyone
has violated it and (c) what will happen if they keep doing
it.
 Direct and clear
 Fielding through repetition (simple message)
 Parallel talking
 Paradoxical
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7. Home Work / Commitment
 Experiment with assertive behavior this and next week.
 First, identify your (typical) pattern.
 For example:
 when you'd normally say 'no', say 'yes'.
 when you'd normally be aggressive, be assertive
 when you'd normally be manipulative, be assertive
 In all cases, observe how other people's response
changes when you change your behavior.
Agenda | Forum | Models | Discussion | Commitment HWR Berlin Supervision Internship LV 401591 / 7

8. Opinionator! [if there‘s time]
Let's move over to the (now fixed) Opinionator to get a
sense of the views of the entire group and not just a few...
?
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