2. In the quest
I have come to understand it as a fleeting emotion,
as fluid as tidal waters. Rather than looking
outward for nirvana, I should instead seek a better
sense of self. In the end, I know for sure that the
only measurement that matters is my own. I do not
give myself permission to measure my worth
against the earthly achievements of others; that is
as superfluous as it is harmful.
3. I have walked
many passages of life and never have I met anyone
who is completely and absolutely in a constant state
of euphoria or happiness. That being said, I am
blessed for having met a rare few who despite the
noise of the world and the scars and blooms of their
own experiences, are truly at one with themselves.
It is they who find the closest state to pure bliss.
4. Every time I have met such a person, they
seemed to have the same traits:
they were remarkable listeners
they read a great deal and reflected even more
they walked away from the chatter of every day regularly, sometimes for an hour, other times much longer
they were always thankful for something even when their plight seemed unbearable to an outsider
they admired simplicity;
they gave space and time to others;
and most importantly, they sought honesty from within before searching for it in others.
5. I hope I shall find this
balance of the wisdoms
A L E X E I O R L O V
6. From where
those that deny the varied degrees of darkness that
molest their minds and sometimes their very souls—
always seeking a distant light, always measuring
always desiring—make victims of themselves. There is
that terrible saying that goes: “the happier
my friends the more I die.” Trying to measure one’s
happiness by the rule of others can be dangerous..
7. Most times the
best of things
are right there with us, if only we did less reaching out
and more listening to the voice within.
I have come to believe that it is important to see
happiness not as something that is an additional
benefit but an inextricable part of existence; what we
value and our values are often not the same thing.
There is no constant state of mind.
8. Another’s perceived success should not be
allowed to serve as the ultimate measure of
our own worth or happiness! How would one
really know what history remains in their
quest? Do you know where the bones may lie,
or what tears have fallen?
9. To my mind, any sense of enduring happiness
is much more about benevolent values,
things that don’t disarm or harm.
A L E X E I O R L O V
10. A person’s fame
or another’s wealth does not make him special, just
different. I am different and unique and so are all
others. Whether one is very public or considers
themselves an unknown is of no real consequence.
Only you—and you alone—know who you really are.
You have the power of self. Social measures are a
man-made delusion. Social strata are pretty much
medieval. Human knowledge: a knowledge of self
and one’s effects upon others is what truly matters.
11. It is incredible
how often we can watch without seeing, hear without
listening, speak without reflection and judge
without understanding. Blind assumption is the mother
of all disaster. Space, reflection, and listening to the
whispers of those who care as much as your own inner
voice are your true and important companions.
The pursuit of happiness is like trying to catch feathers
in the wind; it’s a whimsical folly and will not last
forever. We will have many spikes and many valleys.
12. From the moment we have
basic cognitive power we are taught how to
react to and assimilate things. I have more
chance to stay balanced, with less teetering—
even in this world of uncontrollable wonders—if
I listen to myself and am open to constant
discovery. If I have the courage to reshape and
to retreat, I can then spring forward with an
open mind and spirit.
13. In the search to belong we are all too often
lost while surrounded by many. Being part of
the madding crowd is, I guess, a part of most
of our lives and we have to deal with it. One
can’t just simply get off the proverbial bus
while it speeds along the motorway.
A L E X E I O R L O V
14. But that does
for one moment that you can’t step away from the
invading noise. You’re only good to others when first
you take care of yourself.
15. Search for the
a sense of self and of things that you value that will
keep you appeased even when outside conditions are
rough. Perfection is best found in embracing our
imperfections: We are none of us perfect but like an
aged oak table: gnarled and blemished but still
standing as something utterly specific.
16. Your sense of worth and your sense of self
belong entirely to you. The only place to look
for them is within. To search for these
essential feelings is the most important work
many of us will do, and a continual state of
being. This is in and of itself a happy state.