7 HABITS PRESENTATION ppt. 333.pptx

W
Wisdom1231
••
Private Victories Habit -1, Be Proactive Habit-2, Begin with the End in Mind Habit-3, First things First Public Victories Habit-4, Win/Win Habit-5, First Try to understand than to be understood Habit-6, Synergy Habit-7, Sharpen the Saw Inside-Out again SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE STEPHAN R. COVEY
Stephan R Covey
HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE • Principle of personal vision • Social Mirror • Between stimulus and Response. • Making and Keeping commitments • Reactivity defined • Taking initiative • Act or Be acted upon • Listening to our Language • Circle of influence / Concern • Direct, indirect and No control • Expanding Circle of influence • The HAVs and BEs • Other End of Stick
• To visualize own programme is unique human capability, which no animal enjoys this is called “self awareness”. • This is why we can evaluate and learn from others- we can make and break our habits • We are not our feelings, moods or thoughts. The fact that we can think about these things is self-awareness. It becomes our map HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE PRINCIPLE OF PERSONAL VISION
• The image we have of ourselves comes from social mirror • Its like reflection in crazy mirror. • They are often more projections than reflections, giving concerns and weaknesses of people who are giving input. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE SOCIAL MIRROR
• There are three social mirrors: - – Genetic determination –Psychic determination –Environ determination • Each of these maps is based on stimulus/ response theory. Basic ideas that we are conditioned to respond in a particular way. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE SOCIAL MIRROR
• It means we are responsible (response-able) for our own lives, our decisions, our program - we have response and initiative to make things happen • Proactive don’t blame circumstances, conditions etc. They are not reactive they carry their weather with in. • They are value driven – They are not affected by social environs. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE PROACTIVITY DEFINED
• The ability to subordinate an impulse to a value is essence of proactive person. Proactive are influenced by exterior factors but their response is value based. • Things can hurt us physical / economy but they must not effect our character /identity. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE PROACTIVITY DEFINED
• Frankle suggests - three central values in life: - • Experimental- that happen to us and we bring into existence. • Creative. • Attitudinal- our responses to difficulties, Highest of three attitudinal. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE PROACTIVITY DEFINED
FRANKLE IN NAZI CAMP FRANKLE WHEN FREED
SIGMUND FREUD
HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE TAKING INITIATIVE • Our basic nature is to act and not be acted upon. • Taking initiative means recognize our responsibility to make things happen. • Proactive muscles may be dormant but they are there. • It takes initiative to created P/PC balance and takes initiative to adopt seven habits.
HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE LISTENIING TO OUR LANGUAGE REACTIVE PROACTIVE I shall have to do it. I will choose an appropriate He makes me so mad. I control my own feelings. There is nothing I can do Lets look at the alternative. I must. I prefer
• Excellent way of becoming self aware- look where we spend our time. We have wider concerns, Health children, and work, National debt, Nuclear etc. There are few out of control- circle of concern. There are few in our control- circle of influence. • Proactive focus on circle of influence and reactive on concern. As long as we work on circle of concern, we let circumstances; conditions control us-our circle of influence shrinks and vice versa. Proactive have circle of influence equal to circle of concern. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE CIRCLE OF CONCERN/INFLUENCE
• Problems we face fall in one of three areas – Direct control- our behavior relationship – Indirect control- other people behavior – No control- our past or situation reality. • Direct controls are solved by Habits 1,2,3. Indirect by change our methods of dealing- Habits 4,5,6. No con accept them smilingly. “Give me courage to change things I can, Serenity to accepts those I can’t change and wisdom to know the difference.” HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE DIRECT INDIRECT AND NO CONTROL
In selecting our response we powerfully affect circumstances. We change nature of results. Proactive are not pushy. They are smart, value driven- they read reality and they know what’s needed. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE EXPANDING CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE
Circle of concern is full with haves and circle of influence is filled with BEs. Anytime we think problem is “out there” that thought is the problem. The change paradigm “outside in.” One of my favorites stories is one in Old Testament-Joseph- enslaved- jailed and finally became ruler of Egypt- second only to Pharaoh. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE THE HAVEs AND BEs
If I have troubles in my marriage, what do I gain by continually confessing my wife’s sins? I immobilize myself in a – have situation. There are so many ways to work in circle of influence- be a better listener, be more loving marriage partner, be better student. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE THE HAVEs AND BEs
• Before shifting focus on circle of influence – consider two things in circle of concern – consequences and mistakes. • We are free to choose actions but circumstances are like natural principles they come with it. • Our behavior is governed by principles living in harmony with them good (positive) consequences- violating vice versa. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE THE OTHER END OF THE STICK
• Proactive approaches “ Acknowledge the mistake instantly correct and learn from it.” This literally turns failure into success. “Success is on the other side of failure.” • Cover up empowers first mistake- results even deeper injuries. Its’ not others or our mistakes that hurt us but its our response. Its like Chasing a poisonous snake that has bitten us. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE THE OTHER END OF THE STICK
• At the very heart of our circle of influence is our ability to make and keep commitments. • Through self-awareness and conscience we recognize our areas of weaknesses. Then we use our imagination and independent will to act on that awareness making promises setting goals and being true to them- that build strength of character- that makes possible every other (+ve) thing. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE MAKING AND KEEPING COMMITMENTS
• By making and keeping commitments we establish inner integrity that gives us awareness of self-control and courage and strength to accept more of responsibility for our lives our honor becomes greater than moods. Knowledge that we are responsible is foundation of all effectiveness and of every habit discussed. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE MAKING AND KEEPING COMMITMENTS
• Principle of ‘personal leadership. • Things are created twice / by design or by default. • Leadership and Management – Two creators. • Re-scripting - Becoming won first Creator. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND
• PMS – At the Center. • Principle Center. • Writing and Using PMS. • Using Whole Brain. • Ways to Tap Right Brain. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND
• Expand Perspective. • Visualization and affirmation. • Identify Roles and Goals. • Family Msn Statement. • Org Msn Statement. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND
• “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Homes. • Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND PRINCIPLE OF PRESONAL LEADERSHIP “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
• Begin today with the paradigm/mind setting of end of life. All roles profession/ relationship/ religion/svc community- every thing –means start with clear destination in mind. It is very easy to get trap to daily pushing problems and forget ultimate aim – HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND What Does “begin with the end in mind” “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
• Begin today with the paradigm/mind setting of end of life. All roles profession/ relationsh Easy to forget whether ladder is leaning against the right wall or the activity is in right jungle. Surely yours definition of success will be different from others - Attending funeral a friend asked the others what did he leave, answer was ,” He left it all.” HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND What Does “begin with the end in mind” “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
• All things have two existences. FIRST Imaginative, and SECOND IS ON GROUND. Carpenter’s rule, Measure twice cut once. What you want to achieve as businessman, father, and spouse.. Think, think, and think. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND All things are Created Twice “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
• If we don’t create “1st creation” using self-awareness we will be handed over the same by people/ circumstances/ conditions. We are second creature by design, of our own first creation or second creature by default of what others gave us. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND By Design OR By Default “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
• By design we become principle centered by default… Habit 1 says: - you are the creator. Habit 2 says: - The first creation. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND By Design OR By Default “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
• Habit –2 is based on leadership- leadership is 1st creation. Management is 2nd creation. • Leader says we are in the wrong jungle. Manager says,” shut up we are making great progress”. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Leadership and Management Two creators
We are more in need of a vision /compass less of a road map. Effectiveness and survival depends on direction- right jungle- not on amount of Effort. Efficient management without leadership is straightening chairs on a sinking TITANIC. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Leadership and Management Two creators
o Proactively is based on o Self awareness o Expanded by imagination and o Conscience o Through imagination we can see world with the glasses of our potentials. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Rescripting - becoming your first Creator
Conscience helps us take right path (principles)- self-awareness with the aid of imagination and conscience help write our script. One of the most inspiring Rescripting – ANWAR SADAAT HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Rescripting - becoming your first Creator
ANWAR SADAAT –born, brought up in environs of haltered for ISREAL – made speeches to destroy ISRAEL- detained in CELL - 54 thought with end in mind—“ DAVID CAMP PACT.” HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Rescripting - becoming your first Creator
Most effective way of beginning with ends in Mind writhe a personal Msn statement (PMS). It focuses on what you want (CHARACTER) and to do (CONTIBUTE AND ACHIEVEMENTS) and values on which being or doing is placed. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND PMS
PMS is like a personal constitution – fundamentally changeless. In over 200 yrs there ve’ been 26 amendments- Ten of which are in original bill of RIGHTS. PMS is written constitution a yardstick to evaluate and directed every move and action. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND PMS
PMS based on correct principles provides timeless strength in midst of change with it we can flow with changes with out prejudice of prejudgment. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND PMS
To write a PMS, start from the very center of circle of influence . Here our focused efforts will achieve greatest results. This is high lvl of PC work significantly impacting efficiency of every aspect of our lives. What at center of our life will be source of our security, guidance, wisdom and power. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND AT THE CENTRE
SECURITY- its’ sense of worth and identity. GUIDENCE- Source of direction in life, map or frame of ref. WISDOM- Perspective on life, sense of balance and understanding. It embraces judgment, discernment, and comprehension. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND AT THE CENTRE
POWER- faculty or capacity to act. Vital energy to make choices and decisions to overcome deeply embedded habits. These FOUR are interdependent- create great force of noble personality. Weak at them you are at mercy of circumstances/ conditions/ people. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND AT THE CENTRE
Each of us has a center. – Spouse centeredness – Family centeredness – Money centeredness – Work centeredness – Family centeredness HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND ALTERNATIVE CIRCLE
–Possession centeredness – Pleasure centeredness – Friend/ En centeredness – Church centeredness – Self-centeredness Identify your circle – it may be combination of some circles HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND ALTERNATIVE CIRCLE
Unlike all other centers, the center based on principles doesn’t change. Principles don’t react- they are not short cuts, quick fixes they don’t die. They are fundamental, classic truths, generic common denominators. They are bigger than people and circumstances . HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
We are not omniscient , We are limited but guided by conscience and deciding by self awareness we can expand our knowledge being sure that the light house ( principles) won’t led us into dark/ confusion. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
Wisdom and guidance came from correct map and map gives us direction Power comes from principle centered living its’ power of knowledgeable, self aware and proactive unrestricted by attitudes behaviors that limits others. Only real light of POWER is circumstances picking one end of stick. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
Principles have circumstances attached to them living by tem (+ve) or otherwise. They are common to all, irrespective of our moods, choices or awareness. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
A paradigm is like pair of glasses- out of which flows attitudes, behaviors. As principle centered individual you stand apart from the situation and evaluate options. Any decision will serve one of the other centers but with a difference. you proactively choose your option. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
• Decision is effective since based on principles. • It contributes to ultimate aim of life. • You feel comfortable about the decision; you can focus on it and enjoy it. • A principle centered, sees differently, thinks differently. You have high proactively and highly effective life. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
• Frankle detected not invented MSN in life. Each one has a conscience- gives uniqueness of our live and singular contributes that we can make the first creation. – Habit –1 says ‘ you are programmer – Habit –2 says “write the program ’ HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Writing and Using PMS
• A PMS takes deep introspection, careful analysis, thoughtful expression and often many rewrites before – final. • Even then review it periodically to accommodate changes brought in by years. • Process of writing PMS/MS is as important as MSN itself – it forces to think thorough priority deeply, carefully and align behavior with belief. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Writing and Using PMS
• Imagination and conscience that drive habit two are function of right brain. Research says, right and left-brain specialize different functions. • LEFT HEMISPHERE is more Logical /Verbal. It deals with Words, Parts & Specific Analysis (i.e. to break apart),Sequence Thinking & is Time Bound HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Using whole Brain
• RIGHT BRAIN is more Intuitive , Creative, Dealing with Pictures, with whole and Relationship, with Synthesis, with Simultaneous Thinking; Its not TIME bound. • One side dominates in each individual. Ideal would be use both – That’s not easy HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Using whole Brain
• “He who is good with hammer thinks every thing is a nail.” ABRAHAM MASLOW • We primarily live in Left hemisphere and right is subordinated. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Using whole Brain
Quality of our 1st creation is talk/function of right brain. The more we use it more we visualize, transcend time and present circumstances to project a holistic picture of what we want to do and to be. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Ways to Tap right Brain
Sometimes we are forced into right brain. Death of loved one, and severe illness and financial setback and we face hard questions, what is important? What I am doing. But being proactive we don’t have to wait for event to get us to right brain. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Expand Perspective
No of ways are:- • Write your own eulogy. • Imagine 25th marriage anniversary • Imagine your retirement • As a student imagine its’ your last semester live it like a good student who wants to be remembered. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Expand Perspective
Personal leadership begins by writing PMS, it’s an on going process of keeping vision and values before you and aligning life to most important things. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
• A good affirmation has five ingredients:- – Personal – Positive – Present – Visual – Emotional HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
• If I am a short tempered father, I might write something like this, “ It deeply satisfying (emotional) that I (personal) respond (present tense) with wisdom love firmness and self control (+ve) when my children misbehave” I can visualize, spend few minutes daily totally relaxed- think of instances when my children really misbehave. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
• I visualize in detail chair, dress my child wearing, sweater I am wearing- then I imaging him doing something really stupid. I visualize myself dealing with love, self control and power- This if done on daily basis will change my behavior, Visualize is important you visualize a wrong thing result will be wrong thing. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
“All world class athletes and peak performers are visualizers. They see it, they feel it before they actually do it. They begin with end in mind. When you are in actual situation - its not alien/foreign to you”. DR CHARLES GARFIELD HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
• Writing PMS ………the process of writing distills, crystallizes and clarifies thought and helps break whole into part. We have different roles in life. When we think we don’t think of the whole. Loosing sense of proportion and balance – natural ecology that is necessary. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND IDENTIFY ROLES AND GOALS
• Writing PMS ( including all roles ) gives balance and harmony After selecting roles - thinks of setting goals • Now again into right brain (imagination, creativity) Goals are your values, talent, and sense of msn. • An effective goal focuses on result not activity- gives meaning to activity- influences daily routine. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND IDENTIFY ROLES AND GOALS
• Many families are managed on basis of crises, quick fixes, instant gratification – not on sound principles- People become cynical, yelling overreacting. • Core of the family is shared vision and values – the changeless- by writing MS you gives expression to the true foundation. It gives continue, unity and direction to family. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND FAMILY MSN STATEMENT
• Involving every member in the process of writing is key to its effective use. ---IBM--- course run- sick man – evacuate on heli- charted plane. IBM believes in dignity of individual. • Hotel extraordinarily good svc – each one responsible –reason---evolution of OMS. Remember “NO INVOLVEMENT –NO COMMITMENT.” HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND ORGANIZATIONAL MSN STATEMENT
• Principle of Personal Management. • Power of Independent Will. • Four Generations of Time Management/ • Quadrant-II • What it takes to say “NO” • Quadrant –II Tool. HABIT-3 Put First Things First
• Becoming Quadrant –II self Manager • Living it. • Advances of 4th Generations. • Delegation • Gofer delegation. • Steward delegation. • Quadrant-II Paradigm. HABIT-3 Put First Things First
• Answer two questions, – 1st what one thing if done (regularly) would make a tremendous +ve influence in your personal life? – 2nd What one thing ….in professional life? HABIT-3 Put First Things First Principles of Personal Mgt
• “Habit 3 is fulfillment of habit 1&2” • Habit 1 says, “ You are creator (based on self awareness, conscience, imagination and independent will). • Habit 2 is mental creation- based on imagination- what can’t be seen, potential and conscience provides guidelines. • Habit 3-second creation –Physical –ex of independent will. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Principles of Personal Mgt
• Leadership is right brain activity – When you are asked yourself ultimate questions- Now its time of Habit-3 The management, Left-brain activity. “Manage from left lead from right.” HABIT-3 Put First Things First Principles of Personal Mgt
• Independent will makes effective self- management possible. To make choices and decisions. Human will is amazing thing “ they beat the odds” Empowerment comes from learning and how to use this great endowments in decisions we make every day. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Power of Independent Will
• Level of independent will is measured by our personal integrity- “TO WALK OUR TALK.” “HONOUR WITH SELF.” • Effective mgt is putting first things first. Leadership determines first things (priority) and Mgt puts them first in day to day routine - Discipline carrying is out. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Power of Independent Will
• For effective manager –discipline comes from within. They have will power & integrity to subdue your feelings. “COMMON DENOMINATOR OF SUCCESS” by EM GRAY, spent his life searching one common denominator. He observed, “These people never liked doing things other didn’t like but they subdued their dislike to purpose. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Power of Independent Will
• “Organize and execute around priority” In time management each generation builds on one before it. • 1st Notes and check lists- recognizing important of things require time and energy. • 2nd Calendars and appointment books- effort to look ahead. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Four Generations of Time Mgt
“3rd generation made significant contribution- only problem “Efficiency focus creates expectation that clash with opportunity to create rich relationship to meet human needs to enjoy spontaneous moments in daily life. There is an emerging HABIT-3 Put First Things First Four Generations of Time Mgt
“There is an emerging 4th generation. Time management is, “MISNOMER.” “CHALLENGE IS NOT MANAGE TIME BUT OURSELVES.” To give up all planners is like “throwing baby out with bath water.” HABIT-3 Put First Things First Four Generations of Time Mgt
Urgent Not Urgent I II IMP Crises Pressing Problems Prevention- PC activities Relationship building/Plan/Cr eative activities NOT IMP III IV Interruption/call Mail /reports/meeting Popular activities Trivia/busy work Mail/Phone calls Time wasters Pleasant activities. HABIT-3 TIME Mgt. QUADRANT II
HABIT-3 Put First Things First TIME Mgt. QUADRANT II • Important is result focused – they are not urgent. We react to urgent. Important, require more initiative, more proactively. If we don’t practice habit 2, we will be drifted into urgent. • As long as we focus on quadrant-1 it keep getting bigger and bigger and dominates us. People beaten up by quadrant-1 escape to quadrant IV. Yet individuals who spent time in quadrant III, Urgent but not important “thinking they are in Quadrant - I.”
HABIT-3 Put First Things First TIME Mgt. QUADRANT II • People spending life in quadrant III and IV, spend irresponsible life. Effective people stay out of III and IV; they shrink I to its proper size and spent time in quadrant II. II is ‘Heart” of effective management. Activities incl: - – Building relationship – Planning – Exercising – Preparation
HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO • Only time to get for Quadrant-II is from III and IV. To say, “Yes” to II you will have to say “NO” to pleasant III and IV. • Keep in mind you are always saying NO to something if not to III and IV – then it’s to II. • Question is if you are to falter, where ll’ you: - – Inability to priority. – Inability to organize around priority. – Lack of discipline to execute.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO • Most people (said) will say ‘discipline’-I would say NO – its • Habit- 2 priority. This has not planted into your heart – you are not owned it. There are many who recognize important Quadrant II but they don’t have PMS to support their efforts.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO • They work on attitude, behaviors (not roots). If you are money /spouse/ friend they will throw you in Quadrant III and I reacting to foreign forces. • Your independent will alone can’t discipline you. As maxim goes “form follows function” similarly “mgt follows leadership.” Its’ not possible to say NO to the activities of Quadrant III and IV, if you don’t have burning YES inside you.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO • 3rd generation- clarifies values and setting goals priority activities- this is where time mgt field is today. Critical limitations: - – Daily planning –‘symbolizes’ urgency – it doesn’t question important of daily activities. Its basically priority quadrant I and III and crises of the day. –3rd generation lacks realism –over scheduling day- frustration and escape to quadrant-IV.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO Quadrant-II organizers need to meet six criteria: - • Coherence • Balance • Quadrant -II focus • A people dimension • Flexibility • Portability
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Tools Coherence Harmony between vision and msn and roles and goal, priority and plans, desires and discipline. Keep space for PMS on planner to remind yourself.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Tools Balance Success in one area doesn’t compensate failure in other.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Tools Quadrant -II focus Planner must encourage quadrant-II Organize WEEKLY BASIS –more balance and context than daily planning Business/ education and many facets of society plan on weekly basis Religions every 7th day. “The key is not to priority what’s on your schedule, but to schedule your priority.”
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Tools • A people dimension: - Your planner must deal with people as well. Quadrant –II requires subdued of schedules to people. • Flexibility: - Tool should be servant not master. • Portability: -you may want to review your PMS while riding the bus. Many 3rd generation tools can easily be adapted.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Quadrant –II organization involves for key activities: - • Identify roles • Selecting goals • Schedules • Daily adapting
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Identify Roles Write down key roles: - • Individual • Husband/ Father • Manager • Wife / Mother • Religion • Salesperson, etc.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Selecting Goals You can see ahead with goals in roles and time restrict them. Writing PMS 2xhrs weekly – and 30x mins weekly to examine Can also review appointments already made - to keep / relegate OR reschedule “SHARPEN THE SAW”- & after writing all roles you can put other things around these goals.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Daily Living Taking a few minutes each morning to review you schedule can put you in touch with value based decisions you made as you organize week As well as unanticipated factors that may have come up 3rd generation 1,2,3and A, B, C priority gives needed order to planner
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Living It • Habit 1, says, “You are programmer” • Habit 2 says, “ Write the program” • Habit 3, says, “ Manage/ live the program”
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Living It Living it is primarily function of independent will, our self-discipline, integrity and commitment We are not OMNISCIENT there will be changes to our schedule - We will do it with inner peace since we work for principles and schedules are our servants
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Living It Remember “ effective with people and efficient with things” Remember frustration is a function of expectations and expectations are reflection of social mirror – not our own values and priorities.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Advantages of 4th Generation People are fed up with 3rd generation:- – It defies principles that people are more important – 4th generation of self-mgt is more advance than third in five ways: - • Its principle centered • Its conscience oriented • It defines your unique mission including values and long-term goals • It helps balance by identifying roles • It gives greatest context through weekly organization.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First DELEGATION- INCREASING PAND PC We accomplish all we do through delegation either to time or to other people. If we delegate to time, we think efficiency. If we delegate to the people, we think effectively Effective delegation to other is perhaps the single most powerful high leverage activity there is
HABIT-3 Put First Things First DELEGATION- INCREASING PAND PC Delegation involves others- its’ public victory Since it involves personal management so its’ included here A manager can delegate not producer who values eggs only When a producer spends an hour produces one unit and manager spending one hour produces 20 units Delegation is Fulcrum
HABIT-3 Put First Things First DELEGATION- INCREASING PAND PC Out Put Force No Delegation Delegated
HABIT-3 Put First Things First TYPES OF DELEGATION- GOFFER DELEGATIONS Gofer delegation is “go for this- go for that….” They are producers. They focus on methods. Its’ one on one supervision STEWARD DELEGATION It’s focused on results instead of methods. Gives people choice of methods and makes them responsible. It takes more time in beginning but its’ time well invested
HABIT-3 Put First Things First STEWARD DELEGATION- Steward delegation involves clear, up front mutual understanding and commitment regarding expectations in five areas: - • Desired results • Guidelines • Resources • Accountability • Consequences
HABIT-3 Put First Things First STEWARD DELEGATION- My seven year - Stephan-Garden –green and clean- No response Why daddy, can you help me- garbage- it worked. Trust is highest form of human motivation. It brings out very best - it takes time, Trg and Patience Focus is on effectiveness not efficiency Certainly you can do better than your kid but – Don’t you want to empower him? .
HABIT-3 Put First Things First STEWARD DELEGATION- With immature people specify fewer desired result more guidelines, resources, accountability, interviews and apply immediate consequences.
HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Paradigm Every one habit (seven) is a quadrant –II one. It deals with important tings if done regularly will make tremendous difference in our lives.
HABIT-4 Think win/win • Principle of personal leadership • Six paradigms of human Interaction • Best Option • Win/Win or no deal • Five dimensions of Win/Win • Win / Win Management Training • Win/Win Performance Agreement.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Principle of Interpersonal Leadership Once I worked for a company …… Stephan, they are selfish… I felt the same…Manager had a picture on wall. Racing Horses..Best employ was to win “ Bermuda” trip. Here was problem- they taught win/win but failed to practice it- Here only one was winner and all (rest) were losers. Habit of effective interpersonal leadership is Think Win/Win.
HABIT-4 Think win/win win/win Win/Win is a frame of mind, where mutual benefit in all human interactions is sought. All parties fell good and committed. Dichotomous thinking is flawed – win/win says, there is plenty for every one. Its’ belief in third alternative, its’ not your way, not mine way – its’ better way. •Lose/Win •Lose/Lose •Win Win/Win or No Deal, Win/Win is not a technique, its’ philosophy of human interaction
HABIT-4 Think win/win win/lose • Its’ race to Bermuda- you win- I lose or I win you lose. • Win/Lose are prone to use position, power, and credentials to get their way. • Win comparisons are made among children we script win/ lose in them. • They are communicated that they are not intrinsically lovable. •Lose/Win •Lose/Lose •Win Win/Win or No Deal, Win/Win is not a technique, its’ philosophy of human interaction
HABIT-4 Think win/win win/lose • Academic world reinforces win/lose scripting, a competition not cooperation is at the heart of education system. • Similarly athletics…it is true with law. Without resorting to peaceful means people resort to sue someone. • BUT most of the life is not competition- “Who is winning in your marriage?”
HABIT-4 Think win/win lose/win • “I am looser”, “step on me”, “I am peace maker”. • No standard, no demands, n visions. • They seek strength from popular or acceptance. They have little courage to express their feelings- they are easily intimidated.
HABIT-4 Think win/win lose/win • Win/lose, love Lose/win they are fed on them. • But Lose /win bury feelings which never die – surface in an even uglier way • Disproportionate rage, over reacting and cynicism or common. • It affects self-esteem and relationship with others. Many swing back and forth between win/lose and lose/ win.
HABIT-4 Think win/win lose/lose • When two lose/win face each other – result lose/lose • Divorce husband was order to pay half the price of items to wife. He sold a 10,000$ worth car for 25$ and paid half to wife? • Loses/Lose is philosophy of war- of highly dependent personal who don’t have any inner direction
HABIT-4 Think win/win win They not necessary want somebody to lose. Their only concern self interest- leaving others to secure theirs.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Best Option • Depends, in football both can’t win. You may resort to Lose/win to genuinely affirm someone”. • There will be occasions when you can’t afford losing - life of your child in danger. So the best choice depends on reality. • Win/lose in long run , eventually is a lose/lose. In short, in the long run its not win/win, all others will fail.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Win/Win or No Deal • Means if no mutual benefit we disagree agreeably NO DEAL. • No expectation, performances or contracts. • It provides tremendous emotional freedom in family relationship. If family cannot agree on which video- no deal – they can do something else.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Win/Win or No Deal • In the beginning of business deal its’ most realistic approach. But not, when continuing this relationship, in business. • There are situation when no deal is not an option, I would love to have compromised win/win than to abandon my children.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win Win/win involves exercise of all human endowments: - • Self awareness • Imagination • Conscience • Independent will, it involves mutual – learning influence and benefits.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win • Win/win relationship begins with character and moves towards relationship, out of which flows agreement. Its’ nurtured in an environment where structures and systems are based on win/win. And it involves processes we can’t achieve win/win ends with win/lose or lose/win means.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win Win/win relationship begins with character and moves towards relationship, out of which flows agreement. Its’ nurtured in an environment where structures and systems are based on win/win. And it involves processes we can’t achieve win/win ends with win/lose or lose/win means.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win CHARACTER RELATIIONS AGREEMENT SUPPORTING SYS PROCESSES 1 2 3 4 5
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win CHARACTER Integrity Maturity Abundance Mentality Relationship Agreement
HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Integrity Value we place on ourselves. Developed by habit 1,2,and 3. We develop self- awareness and independent will by making and keeping meaningful promises.
HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Maturity • Balance between courage and consideration. • If a person can express his feelings and convictions with courage balance with consideras5te for others feelings and considers he is mature • Courage – Golden egg, consideration-PC
HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Maturity • Going win/win is tough; you have to be nice and courageous, Empathic , confident – & brave • If I am high on Courage, Low on consideration I will think? Win /Lose
HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Maturity • To compensate for my lack of internal maturity and emotional strength might be from my credentials, seniority etc. • If I am high on consideration, low on courage I will think Lose/win.
HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Abundance Mentality • Paradigm that there is plenty there for every one, it flows from personal worth and security • Opposite to scarce mentality • Results in sharing of prestige recognition, profits.
HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Abundance Mentality • Opens up possibility, options, alternatives and creativity. • Public victory is an outgrowth of Abundance Mentality paradigm.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win RELATIONSHIP • Without trust best solution is compromise • But when EBA is high, credibility is no longer an issue. So we are focused on issues, not personalities or positions. • Even though we see things differently- we are ready to listen each other.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win RELATIONSHIP • Old/Young lady- but We respect it is third alternative, synergistic one • Dealing with win/lose is test of win/win the focus should be circle of influence • You make deposits into EBA. Stronger you are, more genuine your character- Higher your level of proactively more you are commitment to win/win- more influence you enjoy.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win RELATIONSHIP • Its’ beyond transactional leadership into transformational leadership –transformed individual involved as well as relationship • If no way out- you are NO DEAL • An arrangement means very little in letter without the character and relationship based to sustain it.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win AGREEMENTS • From relationship flow agreements that give definition and direction to win/win • They are called Performance agreements or partnership agreements - from hovering supervision to self supervision- from position to partners
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win AGREEMENTS • Delegation (five elements) provides structure for win/win agreement between employer and employees- between groups of people cooperation focused on common objective.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win AGREEMENTS • Following five elements WHICH give win/win a life of their own, are : - –Desired results –Guidelines –Resources –Accountability –Consequences
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN MGT TRAINING • Projects of banking institution COST $7,50,000 selecting students…Twenty-two weeks assigned in various department over six month…. and then the appointment followed. • Our assignment .. to evaluate program… difficulty in getting clear picture. What they should be able to do at the end of course?
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN MGT TRAINING • Answers were vague and often contradictory. Training program dealt with methods. We based our program on different paradigm called, “ learner –Controlled instruction.” • It was a win/win ….. Involved identifying specific objectives ….. Criteria …guidelines, resources, accountability.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN MGT TRAINING • Consequences promotion to assistance manager. 100% objectives … consolidated to 39. • Trainees highly motivated by promotion and salary. We gave them criteria guidelines resources—finished 3-1/2 weeks.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN MGT TRAINING • Administration resisted. How they finished in 4 weeks what took us six months. • Objective were added, they took 1-1/2 week (total 5 weeks). • They went to libraries; to department to teachers… they brainstormed and cooperated.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN PERFORMANCE AGREEMENT • Focus on result not methods. People evaluate themselves. • Delegation is central activity of management. Manager can serve like a pace car. • HE can get things going and then can get out of the way. His job then on is to remove oil spills
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN PERFORMANCE AGREEMENT • He can increase his span of control. HE can supervise 20, 30, 50 or more • IN such agreement consequences become natural or logical results of performance. People involved know them • Every thing is clear from beginning, clear expectation- they are liberating- only personal integrity and trust can maintain team.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win SYSTEMS • Win/Win needs support of system. You get what you reward, win/lose or lose/win. • “A large real state organization- in ME- 800 sales representatives -Awards – Most sales - 40 were awarded… 760 lost….. organization/ aligned system to win/win . Criteria set .. Next year out of 1000, 800 received awards – each one produced much more than last years' 40 combined
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win SYSTEMS • For win/win, training, plan communication, budgeting and information all systems must support it and compensation system- they all are to be abased on win/win • So often the problem is with the system not people. Good people in bad system can’t produce.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win PROCESSES • There’s no way to achieve win/win with win/lose or with lose /win • Essence of principled negotiation is to separate personal from the problem- focus on interests no positions.
HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win PROCESSES For win/win solution following four steps are suggested: - • See problem from others point of view. • Identify key issues and concerns. • What results • Identify options to achieve those results.
PUBLIC VICTORIES • Paradigm of Interdependence • EBA • Six Major Deposits • Laws of Love and Life • P- Problems are PC- Opportunities • Habits of Interdependence
PUBLIC VICTORIES PARADIGM OF INTERDEPENDENCE • There can be no friendship with out confidence and no confidence with out integrity”. SAMUEL JOHNSON • Private victories precede Public victories, independence before interdependence. Algebra before Calculus • If you are not a success with yourself you can’t be successful with others
• Self-discipline and self-mastery are foundation for good relationship with others • Real ingredient of good relationship is not what we say or do but what we are. So place to begin good relationship is inside ourselves, our circle of influence our character PUBLIC VICTORIES PARADIGM OF INTERDEPENDENCE
• Interdependence opens up worlds of opportunities, rich associations for learning, love…. Its’ also where we feel greatest pain, frustration, road blocks to happiness and success. • WE can often live for years with chronic pain of our lack of vision, leadership or mgt, because pain is chronic, we get used to it; we learn to live with it. PUBLIC VICTORIES PARADIGM OF INTERDEPENDENCE
• But our interactions with others problems are acute, we can’t live with it. We resort to quick fixes. Personality Ethic. • But until we stop treating symptoms, we can’t get to the solution. We need P/PC balance. PUBLIC VICTORIES PARADIGM OF INTERDEPENDENCE
• Its’ amount of Trust that’s’ been built up in relationship • If I make (EBA) deposits with you through courtesy, kindness, honesty and keeping my commitments. I build up a reserve- my mistakes will be compensated by this (EBA) reserve PUBLIC VICTORIES EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
• “When trust account is high comm is easy instant and effective” • If trust level is low I am walking on a mine field. I measure every word, its’ a tension city, a memo haven. • People live in compromise- only sex, children and social pressures or image protection can save the marriage PUBLIC VICTORIES EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
• If things are still not taken care off- “fight or flight”. Marriage most intimate most potentially rich, joyful, satisfying and productive relationship between two people on earth • P/PC lighthouse is there we can either break ourselves against it or use it to our advantage PUBLIC VICTORIES EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
• Probably most important deposit can be made by listening just listening- listening to understand • Its’ harder requires patience to establish roots after no body pulls a flower out to see how roots are coming. PUBLIC VICTORIES EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
• Understand the individual • Attending to the little things • Keeping commitments • Clarifying Expectations • Showing Personal integration • Apologizing sincerely; when you make a withdrawal. PUBLIC VICTORIES SIX MAJOR DEPOSITS
• This most important deposit, key to all other deposits. • My friend’s son developed avid interest in baseball, my friend spent a lot of money and time to go and witness a tournament spread over six weeks. • I asked him, “Do you like base ball?” “NO” he said, “but I like my son that much. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Understanding the Individual
• What is important to other person is as important to you as the other person is to you • When we decide what others need we project our intentions on the behavior of others? • Golden rule says, “Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.” PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Understanding the Individual
In relationship the little things are the bug things. “I remember going for movie with two of my sons. In he middle of movie Sean (younger- 4) went to sleep. We came out, it was cold I took off my coat and wrapped it around Sean; Stephan (6-years) was looking … next day …. Stephan broke into tears …. Daddy will you take care of me as you took care of Sean, if I fell asleep and felt cold.” PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Attending Little Things
• Keeping commitment a major deposit and vice versa • Probably the biggest withdrawal is to make a promise, which is important to him and then not to come through it • If promise can’t be kept explain the situation thoroughly and get released from commitment PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Keeping Commitments
• Cause of almost all relationship problem is ambiguous expectation around roles and goals • Many expectations are implicit- like expectation of pair out of marriage. • But when we assume our expectations are understood (without stating) this creates (-ve) energy. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Clarifying Expectations
• Deposit is make expectations explicit and clear in the beginning • Takes investment of time, effort up front, saves great amount of time and effort down the road. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Clarifying Expectations
• Personal integrity creates trust and is the basis of many different kinds of deposits, Integrity is not mere honesty. • Honesty is telling the truth, in other words, conforming our words to reality. Integrity is conforming reality to our words- other words, keeping promises fulfilling expectations PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Showing Personal Integrity
• Requiring an integrity character, oneness, primarily with self but also with life, one of the most important ways to manifest integrity, “Be loyal to those who are not present.” Key to ninety-nine is one • Integrity means you treat people with same yardstick – People start trusting you. “Its’ greater to be trusted than to be loved.”. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Showing Personal Integrity
• “Its’ the weak who are cruel, gentleness can be expected from; the strong” LEO RASKIN • A person must possess himself and have a deep sense of security in fundamental principles and values in order to genuinely apologize. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Apologize sincerely after mistake
To be a deposit an apology must be sincere and it must be perceived as such.. People can forgive mistake but not the mistake of heart the ill intentions, the cover up. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Apologize sincerely after mistake
• When we deposit unconditional love, we live laws of love; we encourage others to live laws of life • Our unconditional love help others feel secure, safe, validated and affirmed in their essential worth, indent and integrity. PUBLIC VICTORIES LLAW OF LIFE AND LAW OF LOVE
• When we counsel, when we plead, we set limits and consequences. But we love regardless. • “Its’ more noble to give yourself completely to one individual than to labor diligently for the salvation of masses.” DAG HAMMARSKJOLD SGUN. PUBLIC VICTORIES LLAW OF LIFE AND LAW OF LOVE
• When parents see problems of their children as opportunities to build relationship. It changes parent child interaction. • Gives parents more leverage and children a sense that they are valued. It is true for business and other department. PUBLIC VICTORIES LLAW OF LIFE AND LAW OF LOVE
Its’ impossible to achieve public victory with popular win/win negotiation ‘ techniques’ or ‘ reflective listening’ techniques has focus on ‘personality and truncate character. PUBLIC VICTORIES HABITS OF INTERDEPENDENCE
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND • Principles of Empathic listening. • Character and communication. • Empathic Listening. • Diagnose before Prescription. • Four Autobiographical responses. • Under sting and Perception • Then seek to understand • One on One.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Principle of Empathic Listening Suppose you develop eyes trouble- visit optometrist – After brief listening he hands you over his glasses saying “ These are good and served him good for ten years.” Similarly, how we often diagnose before we prescribe in communication? WE want to fix things with good advice- failing to diagnose. Most important principle I have learned in field of interpersonal relationship, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Basics of Communication Four basic types of communication: - • Reading • Written • Speaking • Listening
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Basics of Communication We spent years learning, reading, writing and speaking. But what about listening? • Real key to your influence is your example, - it flows out of character- not people say about you. • Character radiates and communication- and if your private performance doesn’t square with your public performance, its very hard for me to open up with you.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Basics of Communication And unless I open up, can you counsel me. You may say you appreciate me, but how can you appreciate me when you don’t even understand me? You can’t do it with techniques. You will have to build the skills of empathic listening.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening • “Seeking first to Understand” involves a very deep shift in paradigm. • Most people listen to reply. They are either speak or preparing to speak. • A father once told me,” I can’t understand my kind. He just won’t listen to me”. “I thought had to understand another person, you needed to listen to him”.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening When other person speaks, we are usually Listening at one of four levels: - • Ignoring • Pretending • Selective listening • Alternative listening. • The fifth and highest level is Empathic Listening.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Empathic Listening is not referring to “Active” or “Reflective” listening. These last two levels may not project your autobiography- but motive of listening is autobiographical. Empathic listening means listening with intent to understand. Its’ getting into other man’s frame of reference.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Empathy is not Sympathy. Sympathy is form of agreement, judgment (Mountaineers example - sympathy/empathy). Sympathy makes people dependent. Unlike sharing Empathy is understanding other person’s position emotionally/intellectually.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Experts estimate: - • 10%- of comm represented by words. • 30%- sounds. • 60%- body language. • In empathic listening you listen with your ears, your eyes and heart. You listen for behavior. You use right brain and left-brain. You sense, intuit and feel.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Empathic listening is a great EBA deposit- it gives a person “Psychological Air”. “Satisfied needs don’t motivate”- Next to physical survival is “Psychological Aurvival”- i.e. to be understood, to be affirmed, to be validated to be appreciated. When you listen with empathy you give psychological air to other person.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Seeking first to understand, diagnose before you prescribe- it is hard. Its’ easier to had over your pair of glasses. Empathic listening is risky. It takes a great deal of security to go into deep listening experience because you open yourself- You may be influence. To understand. Habit 1,2,and 3 give you required inner core – the changeless.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Diagnose before you Prescribe If you don’t have confidence in diagnose you won’t have confidence in prescription. A good lawyer almost writes the opposite attorney’s case before writes his own. Good engineer evaluates stresses at work, before designing bridges… Key to good judgment is understanding. By judging first a person will never fully understand.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Autobiographical Responses Because we listen autobiographically we tend to respond in one of four ways • We evaluate • We probe • We advise • We interpret
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Autobiographical Responses We try to figure out people, to explain their motives, their behavior, based on our motives and behaviors. Constant probing is one of he reason parents don’t get close to their children. He knows the moment he comes out with the problem he, “didn’t I tell you.”
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Autobiographical Responses Empathic listing involves four developing stages: • 1st-least effective is “mimic content” • 2nd-rephrase content-little more effective. • 3rd-you reflect feelings. • 4th, 2nd, 3rd , you rephrase and reflect feelings.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Autobiographical Responses As a doctor you can’t say, “I am in hurry, take this diagnose, I can’t diagnose.” I remember one time writing in a room on North shore of Oahu, Hawaii. I had opened two windows- wind picked up- scattering my unnumbered pages. I trying frantically to run after them- Finally I realized to close one window by spending 10 seconds.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Understanding and Perception As you learn to listen deeply - You see young lady/ I see old lady and both can be right. You may look world through, “spouse center” and I “money center” –You may be scripted in “Abundance Mentality”, I in “scarce Mentality”
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Understanding and Perception You may approach with “ right brain”, I “left brain”. We lived for years on our paradigms and thought only “we know facts” But now we can work together- Answer is Habit- 5. Its’ first step in process of win/win. Even other person is not coming from same paradigm, seek first to understand.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Then Seek to be Understood Knowing how to be understood is other part of Habit-5. Equally important to reach win/win solution Seeking to understand requires consideration- and to be understood requires courage. Win/win requires high degree of both. Early
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Then Seek to be Understood Greeks had magnificent philosophy. • Ethos- Faith people have in you • Pathos- Empathic side- feeling • Logos-Logic- reasoning part of presentation Sequence is important people go straight to Logos.
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND One on One Habit-5 is in center of your circle of influence. Don’t waste time in circle of concern Habit –5 is inside-out approach. When you listen empathically you become inalienable- key to influence is to become influence-able
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND One on One Spend time on children, One on one. Listen to them; understand them. Build EBA, give air Go out with spouse on a regular basis. Have dinners. Listen to each other, seek to understand. See life through each other eyes
HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND One on One Similarly in business spend time with each employ. When you listen you learn. When we deeply listen each other- creative solution and third alternative Our differences become stepping-stones for synergy.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY • Synergy of creative Cooperation • Synergic communication • Synergy in class room • Synergy in Business • Synergy and communication • Negative Synergy.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY • Valuing the Difference. • Force field Analysis • All Nature is Synergy • Fishing for the 3rd Alternative.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION I take as my guide through hope of a saint: - • “ In crucial things, unity • In important things, diversity • In all things, generosity.” GEORGE BUSH Exercise of all other habits prepares us for ht habit of Synergy.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION Synergy- highest activity in all life- true tests of all other habits It focuses on • Four human endowments • Win/win • Skill of empathic communication.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION On toughest challenge we face in life- catalyzes, unifies and unleashes the greatest powers with people Synergy -? Its’, “the whole is greater then the sum of its parts.”
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION Creative process terrifying - you don’t know exactly where its’ going to lead - confront an entirely new and unknown wilderness. You become pathfinder, opening new possibilities, new territories, and new continents.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION Synergy is everywhere in nature. The very way a man and woman bring a child into the world is synergistic. Essence of synergy is value the difference- Build on them. Synergy can create new script for the next generation- less protective, less adversarial less selfish- more open, more trusting.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY COMM Comm synergy opens mind, heart and expression o to new possibilities, alternatives and options Many people never experienced a moderate degree of synergy in their family life. They wasted their life- because they never tapped great potential laying in them.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY COMM An occasional /accidental synergistic event may form part of their memory but That is “ a miracle” to them But these things can be produced regularly. But it requires enormous personal security, openness and a spirit of adventure.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY COMM Since creative endeavors are somewhat unpredictable, seem ambiguous and unless people have high tolerance for ambiguity and get their security from integrity to principles and inner values they find it unnerving and unpleasant to be involved in highly creative enterprises.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY IN CL ROOM There are times neither teacher knows nor students are sure what’s going to happen. In an open environ comes brainstorming, where spirit of evolution is subdued to spirit of creativity, imagination and intellectual network. Synergy is collective agreement to subdued old scripts and to write a new one.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY IN CL ROOM Synergy sometimes leads to harsh ugly facts of life- and we dread it- we tend to be more protective Its’ like administrator who as a reaction to few individuals misuse /abuse of rules drafts new rules to limit the freedom of all
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY IN CL ROOM The more empathic you are, more open are you- providing security to others to open up and they express Themselves People with half sentences start reading each other completely – Opening new doors of …….
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY IN BUSINESS Far eastern philosophy, “we seek not to imitate masters, rather we seek what they sought.”
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY & COMM Synergy comm attitude is, “if a person of you intelligence and competence and commitment disagree with me, then there must be something to your disagreement that I don’t understand and I need to understand”
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY & COMM TRUST CO OPERATION Defensive Respectful Win/Win
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY & COMM • Defensive means = 1+1 =1(or less) • Respectful = 1+1 = 2 • Synergy = 1+1 = 8 OR 16 OR 50+.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FISHING FOR THIRD ALTERNATIVE How comm matters in interpersonal relationship, “ Its’ vacation time, Husband wants his family and children to go (long planned) to country camp and fishing. Children are excited about it but wife wants to go to see her ailing mother…… “She is not all that ill, and she has your sister- we have been planning for so long”
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FISHING FOR THIRD ALTERNATIVE “My mom is more important then fishing, and she is my mother too” she retards If they have high deposits they understand each other’s position. They can camp near her mother’s town. They can divide leave (not family). They can plan to spend a week with her mother after wards
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FISHING FOR THIRD ALTERNATIVE And if they see it differently this will breed discontentment, polarization and withdrawal from EBA They can never go for middle way- the 3rd alternative When they understand each other they are on the same side and problem on the other side. Husband understands wife’s’ feelings and wife understand him and children’s’
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY NEGATIVE SYNERGY Third alternative is major paradigm shift from dichotomous approach. Dependent people have high need to clone others. They don’t know the very strength of relationship is having others point of view Unity is complementation not sameness, sameness is uncreative.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY NEGATIVE SYNERGY Being principled makes us whole- Integrated, We have access to both intuitive, creative and visual right brain and analytical, logical left- brain And when the whole brain is working – life is not just logical, it’s emotional too. Manage from the left lead from the right Can you have children if you don’t value the difference? Its’ an act of SYNERGY.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY NEGATIVE SYNERGY Being principled makes us whole- Integrated, We have access to both intuitive, creative right brain and analytical, logical left-brain And when the whole brain is working – life is not just logical, it’s emotional too. Manage from the left lead from the right Can you have children if you don’t value the difference? Its’ an act of SYNERGY.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE Key is- to realize - every one sees the world not as it’s but as he is. To be truly effective - know own limitations and recognizes others potentials/resources. It adds to knowledge When we are left to our own brain/experience we are short on data. Is it logical that two people disagree and both are right- its’ not logical its’ psychological
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE Young lady /old lady- we interpret differently because we are conditioned as such Unless we value the differences and recognize that life is not always either – or- we can’t transcend this condition When we differ – I say OK let me see how you see it. If two have same opinions one is unnecessary
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE When I talk to somebody who differs, it :- • Adds to my knowledge • Affirm you, I create synergy
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE Once upon a time animals decided they must do something heroic --- Adopted and activity curriculum.. Duck was excellent in swimming but—Rabbit was at top in running but---- Squirrel was good in climbing but----Eagle a problem ---- child --- On top at climbing but insisted on using his own means to do it. At the end of the year an abnormal eel
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE an abnormal eel that could swim exceedingly well and could also run, climb and fly a little had the highest average and was valediction. The dogs stayed out of school and fought the tax levy because administration would not add digging and burrowing to curriculum. They sent their children to private schools.
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS Synergy; is powerful in dealing with (-ve) forces that works against growth and change. Sociologist KURT LEWIN developed a “force field Analysis”
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS DRIVING RESTRAINING
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS Driving forces generally are (+ve) reasonable, logical conscious and economical Juxtaposition (-ve) forces are often (-ve), emotional, illogical, unconscious and social/psychological Both sets are real and must be taken into account
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS To improve upon its’ necessary to add to (+ve) forces, but you will have to act on (- ve) forces to reduce/eliminate them Adding to (+ve) forces alone will bring some temporarily results – in long run that will not work - It’s like pressing against the spring
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS But when you introduce synergy, you use Motive of Habit-4, Skill of Habit–5, and Interaction of Habit-6 to work directly on restraining forcers As a result new vision, shared goals are created
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY ALL NATURE IS SYNERGISTIC Although you can’t control paradigm of others a great deal of synergy is within your circle of influence Your internal synergy is completely in your circle of influence You can respect both – analytic and creative side of yours You can use their difference to catalyze creativity
HABIT- 6 SYNERGY ALL NATURE IS SYNERGISTIC You can use their difference to catalyze creativity Use others’ difference to improve /expand your knowledge to improve upon your point of view
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL - SHARPEN THE SAW • Principles of Balance Renewal • Four dimensions of Renewal • Physical • Spiritual • Social/emotional • Scripting Others • Balance in Renewal • Synchronize in Renewal • Upward spiral
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL PRINCIPLES OF BALANCE SELF RENEWAL “Sometimes when I consider what tremendous consequences come from little things… I am tempted to think …. There are no little things.”
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL PRINCIPLES OF BALANCE SELF RENEWAL Suppose you were to come upon someone in the woods working feverishly to saw down a tree “How long have you been doing it?” “Over five hours” “Why don’t you take five minutes break to sharpen the saw?” “I don’t have the time to sharpen the saw”
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL Habit-7 is personal PC. It’s preserving and enhancing. Its renewing four dimensions, physical, spiritual, social and mental
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL Physical: - Exercise, Nutrition, Stress mgt Spiritual: - Value clarification and cmt, study and meditation. Social/Emotional: - Service, Empathy, Sync and Intrinsic security. Mental: - Reading, visualization, planning and writing
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL Ex is Quadrant-II activity, its’ not urgent- as a result - sooner or later we find ourselves in Quadrant-I- dealing with health problems and crises It requires 30 mins every 2nd day and it tremendously effects complete week And it needs no special equipment
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL A good ex program attends three areas: - Endurance Aerobic ex. Min fitness is to keep heartbeat for 30 mins at 100 pulse/min. Ideally you should try to raise your heart rate. It’s accepted to be 220 less age. If the age is 30yrs, the formula will be: - 220-30 = 190x 0.6 = 114
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL Flexibility It comes through stretching – warm up - before and after stretching Strength Pull-ups, push-ups, sit ups and weights. You won’t like it but be proactive whether its’ raining or any other problem
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPRITUAL DIMENSION Renewing spiritual dimension gives ldrshp to life. It’s your core, center, and cmt to your value system Immersion in great literature or great music can provide a similar renewal of the spirit for some
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPIRITUAL DIMENSION Arthur Gordon story when he had lost interest in life – it was growing worse day by day Finally when doctor couldn’t find any thing wrong with him instructed him to follow his advice for one day He gave him four prescriptions and told him – go to the place you liked most and read them at 9, 12, 15 and 18’ O clock respectively
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPIRITUAL DIMENSION Next morning went to beach, • First prescription “listen carefully”…… began listening sounds and silence it gave him inner peace. • Second prescription “Try reaching back.” • Third prescription It read, “Examine your motives”.
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPIRITUAL DIMENSION At first he was defensive …. Then he wrote, “If ones motives are wrong nothing can be right --- and the true motive is service.” • Fourth prescription “ Write your worries on the sand”. They all were washed away by waves
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPIRITUAL DIMENSION “I have so much to do today, I will need to spend another hour on my knees” MARTIN LUTHER “The greatest battles of life are fought out daily in silent chambers of soul”
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL MENTAL DIMENSION After leaving formal education we let our minds atrophy- not doing series reading, no writing - we spend time watching TV Time consumption by TV is 35-45 hours/week (USA). Its’ as much time, as invested in any JOB
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL MENTAL DIMENSION Habit –3 is required to control it. Like body, TV is good servant and poor master Extremely important to Train mind, to stand apart and examine its own program. That’s the definition of liberal education- the ability to examine the program of life against larger questions and purposes and other paradigms
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL MENTAL DIMENSION That’s why its ‘ so valuable to read broadly and to expose yourself to great minds Read good literature, you can get into the best minds- start with a book every month then two and finally a book per week “ A person who doesn’t read is no better to a person who can’t read.”
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL MENTAL DIMENSION Writing - powerful way to sharpen the saw- helps think clearly, Writhing on good deeper thoughts not about Shallow superficial events Its’ said,” Wars are won in General’s tents” Sharpening the saw in physical, mental and spiritual lvl is called “daily private victory” Spend one hour a day for rest of your life daily.
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL DIMENSION While spiritual, mental, physical renewal requires Habits 1,2,and 3 The social life is related to others. This dimension doesn’t require time it require exercise (mind setting) when we meet people on daily basis
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL DIMENSION When you see old lady I see young lady- Using Habit –4, I value this difference, using Habit-V, listen you empathically and then comm my point of view Based on commitment to search or 3rd alternative we move to Habit –6. But to practice Habit-4, 5 and 6 you got to have personal worth and that comes from life of integrity
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL DIMENSION There is also security in knowing win/win does exist - but to achieve the required courage and inner security comes from Habit –1, 2 and3 Service to others adds to our security – More so the anonymous service when influence no recognition dominates
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL DIMENSION “I want to be thoroughly used up when die” G GERNAARD SHAW. SEREVICE IS THE RENT WE PAY FOR PRIVILAEGE OF LIVING ON THIS EARTH NELON TANNER
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SCRIPTING OTHERS When we reflect to others their pro-activity their importance, we help them as principle centered, value based, independent worthwhile individual And “abundance Mentality” tells us nothing diminishes by sharing When somebody doesn’t believe in himself and you believe in him you script him
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SCRIPTING OTHERS We can become (+ve) scripter, story of a class in England It was inaccurately programmed, labeling of bright kids” dumb” and dumb kids as ‘bright” – 5 1/2 months latter……? “ Treat a person as he is, he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can and he should be and he will become as he can be and should be.” GOETHE
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL BALANCE IN RENEWAL To neglect one out of four dimensions effects others. Any dimension neglected will create (-ve) force field resistance that pushes against effective growth In organizing physical dimension is expressed in economical terms
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL BALANCE IN RENEWAL Mental/ psy in recognition, development, use of talent Social/Emotional dimension human relationship, with how people are treated Spiritual- gives meaning through purpose and contribution Process of continual improvement is hallmark of total Quality Movement and key to Japan’s ascendancy
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SYNERGY IN RENEWAL Renewal in any dimension increases your ability to live at least one of seven habits. More proactive (habit –1) you are: - • More effective you can exercise personal ldrshp (habit-2) and mgt (habit-3) • More effectively managed life (habit –3) more Quadrant –II renewing activities you can do (habit-7)
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SYNERGY IN RENEWAL • More you seek first to understand (habit –5) more you can go for win/win relationship (habit 4 and 6) • Each daily private victory makes a deposit in your personal intrinsic security account • Rich private life with respect to spiritual – tremendous deposit in personal security account
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SYNERGY IN RENEWAL • Mental dimension contribution to mgt (Habit-3) • Your economy doesn’t lie in job it lies in – Power to produce, think learn, create, adapt • That’s’ true financial independence. • It’s not wealth its’ power to produce wealth. Its’ intrinsic
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL Renewal – empowers to move on an up ward spiral of growth and change, of continuous improvement. To make meaningful and consistent progress along the spiral needs- “conscious”. It senses our congruence or disparity with correct principles and lifts us towards them
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL Just as education of mind is important to students and scholars- conscious is vital to truly proactive people Training and educating conscious requires greater discipline, concentrated, honest living in harmony with little inner voice
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL Just as junk food can destroy athletes, things that are obscene, crude or pornographic can breed an inner darkness that numbs higher sensitivities and substantial social conscious of “ will I be found out” for “ what is right or wrong”
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL Once we recognize important of values, principles, purposes we must LIVE by them–or the vacuum will be filled, and we will lose our self-awareness and become like groveling animals that live primarily for survival and propagation
HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL And there is no short cut to them - law of Harvest governs. We must indulgence by educating and obeying our conscious. Moving along upward spiral requires us to learn, cmt and do increase at higher planes. We deceive ourselves if we think that any one of these is sufficient.
INSIDE OUT AGAIN I share my own story. When I read paragraph, “Gap between stimulus and response” struck me. I started to stand in gap between stimulus and response and started to observe myself It was almost like knowing it for the 1st time. Sandra and myself began an exciting adventure into our interior worlds- a world that fascinated us both
INSIDE OUT AGAIN Initially we were supportive and helpful encouraging each other through empathic listening – It was difficult, painful some times uglier- embarrassing – it made us extremely open and vulnerable. We gradually evolved two ground rules – though unspoken. 1st was no probing – only to empathize. 2nd was, when it was too much hurting- we would call it a day
INSIDE OUT AGAIN One hang up was Sandra’s obsession with “Frigidiare” appliances- She would go out of way- for Frigidiare” It always made me sick.. Then came the story.. Time of recession her father worked for “Frigidiare” and when he returned home in the evening he would share with Sandra the hard job. The only hope her father had that “Frigidiare” supports his invention program
INSIDE OUT AGAIN I remember we both became tearful that day.. We found, key to be in love is to talk, even when I travel I keep in touch. Its’ like touching home base, which accesses all the happiness, security and value it represents.
INTERGENERATIONAL LIVING Using gap between stimulus and response empowers to examine our program, Rescripting and creating important Quadrant-II activities Doing it we both were able to see at deeper level The scripts we were given (I spoke earlier) included beautiful, +ve scripts passed down to us and we never valued them- blindly taken it for granted
INTERGENERATIONAL LIVING There is transcendent power in a strong intergenerational family An effective independent family of children, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles cousin can be a powerful force in helping people have a sense of what they are where they came from and what they stand for These relationships reflect a powerful picture and help script/program positively
INTERGENERATIONAL LIVING Similarly they act a surrogate mother/father They all become +ve social mirror “There re only two lasting bequests we can give our children The roots and The wings”
INTERGENERATIONAL LIVING Similarly they act a surrogate mother/father They all become +ve social mirror “There re only two lasting bequests we can give our children The roots and The wings”
BECOMING TRANSITIONAL PERSON To rise above –ve scripting. Terry Warner calls a “Transition” person. IF you were abused as child that doesn’t mean you will have to abuse your children- Because you are proactive, you can rewrite the script. Forgive your parents- and if they are alive build +ve relationship with them through “First seek to understand” You are a transitional person – a link between past and future
BECOMING TRANSITIONAL PERSON One powerful Transitional Person “ Anwar Saadat”…….Achieving unity – oneness – with ourselves, with our loved ones with our friends and working associated and its’ fruit of Seven Habits If we start with daily Private victory - result will surely come. “That we persist in doing becomes easier not that nature of the task has changed , but our ability to do has changed”. EMERSON
PERSONAL NOTE I believe that there are parts to human nature that can’t be reached by either legalisations or education, but require the power of GOD deal with I believe that as human beings , we can’t perfect ourselves. To the degree to which we align ourselves with correct principles, divine endowments will be released within our nature in enabling us to fulfill the measures of our creation
PERSONAL NOTE “We mustn’t cease from exploration and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we BEGAN and to know the place for the first time” T.S. ELLIOT
1 de 273

7 HABITS PRESENTATION ppt. 333.pptx

••
Baixar para ler offline
Liderança e gerenciamento

Seven Habits.... A beautiful book - covered in best possible details... Happy Reading

W
Wisdom1231

Recomendados

Problem Solving - Concepts and Approach for Systems and Strategies por
Problem Solving - Concepts and Approach for Systems and StrategiesProblem Solving - Concepts and Approach for Systems and Strategies
Problem Solving - Concepts and Approach for Systems and StrategiesAxel Vanhooren
5K visualizações•180 slides
Chapter 5 planning and decision making por
Chapter 5 planning and decision makingChapter 5 planning and decision making
Chapter 5 planning and decision makingAmira Jamal
8.5K visualizações•35 slides
Problem solving por
Problem solvingProblem solving
Problem solvingBalasingham Karthiban
1.8K visualizações•27 slides
M1 Problem Solving Techniques por
M1 Problem Solving TechniquesM1 Problem Solving Techniques
M1 Problem Solving TechniquesUniversity of New Haven
1.4K visualizações•7 slides
Problem solving por
Problem solvingProblem solving
Problem solvingsandrita87
3.3K visualizações•30 slides
Problem Solving por
Problem SolvingProblem Solving
Problem SolvingAtiqul Haq Mazumder
4K visualizações•74 slides

Mais conteúdo relacionado

Similar a 7 HABITS PRESENTATION ppt. 333.pptx

Seven Habits of Highly Effective People por
Seven Habits of Highly Effective PeopleSeven Habits of Highly Effective People
Seven Habits of Highly Effective PeopleTania Aslam
28.2K visualizações•62 slides
7 Habits of Highly Effective People.pptx por
7 Habits of Highly Effective People.pptx7 Habits of Highly Effective People.pptx
7 Habits of Highly Effective People.pptxJOCELYNBALAGUSA2
50 visualizações•145 slides
7 habits of highly effective people por
7 habits of highly effective people7 habits of highly effective people
7 habits of highly effective peopleotree
1.8K visualizações•58 slides
Fcv guidebook(7habits)-180803 por
Fcv guidebook(7habits)-180803Fcv guidebook(7habits)-180803
Fcv guidebook(7habits)-180803Jet Nakajima
206 visualizações•53 slides
7 habbits.pptx por
7 habbits.pptx7 habbits.pptx
7 habbits.pptxRaoShaharyar2
19 visualizações•48 slides
7 habits of highly effective people por
7 habits of highly effective people7 habits of highly effective people
7 habits of highly effective peopleSubham Burnwal
671 visualizações•29 slides

Similar a 7 HABITS PRESENTATION ppt. 333.pptx(20)

Seven Habits of Highly Effective People por Tania Aslam
Seven Habits of Highly Effective PeopleSeven Habits of Highly Effective People
Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
Tania Aslam•28.2K visualizações
7 Habits of Highly Effective People.pptx por JOCELYNBALAGUSA2
7 Habits of Highly Effective People.pptx7 Habits of Highly Effective People.pptx
7 Habits of Highly Effective People.pptx
JOCELYNBALAGUSA2•50 visualizações
7 habits of highly effective people por otree
7 habits of highly effective people7 habits of highly effective people
7 habits of highly effective people
otree•1.8K visualizações
Fcv guidebook(7habits)-180803 por Jet Nakajima
Fcv guidebook(7habits)-180803Fcv guidebook(7habits)-180803
Fcv guidebook(7habits)-180803
Jet Nakajima•206 visualizações
7 habbits.pptx por RaoShaharyar2
7 habbits.pptx7 habbits.pptx
7 habbits.pptx
RaoShaharyar2•19 visualizações
7 habits of highly effective people por Subham Burnwal
7 habits of highly effective people7 habits of highly effective people
7 habits of highly effective people
Subham Burnwal•671 visualizações
7 habits por GerdaPepito1
7 habits7 habits
7 habits
GerdaPepito1•171 visualizações
7 Habits Ppt. por Rashi Gupta
7 Habits Ppt.7 Habits Ppt.
7 Habits Ppt.
Rashi Gupta•1.4K visualizações
7 habits ppt. por Rashi Gupta
7 habits ppt.7 habits ppt.
7 habits ppt.
Rashi Gupta•120.6K visualizações
7 habits por Meetika Malhotra
7 habits7 habits
7 habits
Meetika Malhotra•2.8K visualizações
7-Habits-COMPLETE (1).ppt por SadikMADANIALAOUI1
7-Habits-COMPLETE (1).ppt7-Habits-COMPLETE (1).ppt
7-Habits-COMPLETE (1).ppt
SadikMADANIALAOUI1•16 visualizações
7-Habits-COMPLETE.ppt por ArtOrganik
7-Habits-COMPLETE.ppt7-Habits-COMPLETE.ppt
7-Habits-COMPLETE.ppt
ArtOrganik•2 visualizações
Seven habits por smartman4444
Seven habitsSeven habits
Seven habits
smartman4444•345 visualizações
The 7 habits of highly effective people por Unike Pcool
The 7 habits of highly effective peopleThe 7 habits of highly effective people
The 7 habits of highly effective people
Unike Pcool•348 visualizações
7 Habits of Highly Effective People por Jahanzeb Jahan
7 Habits of Highly Effective People7 Habits of Highly Effective People
7 Habits of Highly Effective People
Jahanzeb Jahan•465 visualizações
7 habits por Saloni Sanghani
7 habits7 habits
7 habits
Saloni Sanghani•1.2K visualizações
7 habits por Saloni Sanghani
7 habits7 habits
7 habits
Saloni Sanghani•31 visualizações
7 habits effectiveness por Manoj Kumar
7 habits effectiveness7 habits effectiveness
7 habits effectiveness
Manoj Kumar•110 visualizações
7 habits-complete por Usman Rana
7 habits-complete7 habits-complete
7 habits-complete
Usman Rana•654 visualizações
7 habits of highly effective people por Sivakumaran Subash
7 habits of highly effective people7 habits of highly effective people
7 habits of highly effective people
Sivakumaran Subash•1.6K visualizações

Último

TAX ANALYSIS (CASE OF RWANDA).pptx por
TAX ANALYSIS (CASE OF RWANDA).pptxTAX ANALYSIS (CASE OF RWANDA).pptx
TAX ANALYSIS (CASE OF RWANDA).pptxSadamuFrancois
11 visualizações•29 slides
balixa.io Plan.pdf por
balixa.io Plan.pdfbalixa.io Plan.pdf
balixa.io Plan.pdftycoonone91
30 visualizações•29 slides
v20231127 WHOPE BEMA Day One Sendai Framework Volunteer Workshop Session Zoom... por
v20231127 WHOPE BEMA Day One Sendai Framework Volunteer Workshop Session Zoom...v20231127 WHOPE BEMA Day One Sendai Framework Volunteer Workshop Session Zoom...
v20231127 WHOPE BEMA Day One Sendai Framework Volunteer Workshop Session Zoom...Andrew Networks
50 visualizações•40 slides
The Wheel of Life - Coaching Wheel por
The Wheel of Life - Coaching WheelThe Wheel of Life - Coaching Wheel
The Wheel of Life - Coaching WheelAlex Clapson
22 visualizações•1 slide
Cracking the Optimism vs Pessimism Code.pptx por
Cracking the Optimism vs Pessimism Code.pptxCracking the Optimism vs Pessimism Code.pptx
Cracking the Optimism vs Pessimism Code.pptxWorkforce Group
32 visualizações•18 slides
7 Questions on Leadership with William H. Bender.pdf por
7 Questions on Leadership with William H. Bender.pdf7 Questions on Leadership with William H. Bender.pdf
7 Questions on Leadership with William H. Bender.pdfWilliam (Bill) H. Bender, FCSI
17 visualizações•10 slides

Último(14)

TAX ANALYSIS (CASE OF RWANDA).pptx por SadamuFrancois
TAX ANALYSIS (CASE OF RWANDA).pptxTAX ANALYSIS (CASE OF RWANDA).pptx
TAX ANALYSIS (CASE OF RWANDA).pptx
SadamuFrancois•11 visualizações
balixa.io Plan.pdf por tycoonone91
balixa.io Plan.pdfbalixa.io Plan.pdf
balixa.io Plan.pdf
tycoonone91•30 visualizações
v20231127 WHOPE BEMA Day One Sendai Framework Volunteer Workshop Session Zoom... por Andrew Networks
v20231127 WHOPE BEMA Day One Sendai Framework Volunteer Workshop Session Zoom...v20231127 WHOPE BEMA Day One Sendai Framework Volunteer Workshop Session Zoom...
v20231127 WHOPE BEMA Day One Sendai Framework Volunteer Workshop Session Zoom...
Andrew Networks•50 visualizações
The Wheel of Life - Coaching Wheel por Alex Clapson
The Wheel of Life - Coaching WheelThe Wheel of Life - Coaching Wheel
The Wheel of Life - Coaching Wheel
Alex Clapson•22 visualizações
Cracking the Optimism vs Pessimism Code.pptx por Workforce Group
Cracking the Optimism vs Pessimism Code.pptxCracking the Optimism vs Pessimism Code.pptx
Cracking the Optimism vs Pessimism Code.pptx
Workforce Group•32 visualizações
7 Questions on Leadership with William H. Bender.pdf por William (Bill) H. Bender, FCSI
7 Questions on Leadership with William H. Bender.pdf7 Questions on Leadership with William H. Bender.pdf
7 Questions on Leadership with William H. Bender.pdf
William (Bill) H. Bender, FCSI•17 visualizações
Lucky Cement Presentation.pdf por bakhtawaraq
Lucky Cement Presentation.pdfLucky Cement Presentation.pdf
Lucky Cement Presentation.pdf
bakhtawaraq•10 visualizações
Action Project Presentation.pptx por Khondoker Rukaiya Siddiqa
Action Project Presentation.pptxAction Project Presentation.pptx
Action Project Presentation.pptx
Khondoker Rukaiya Siddiqa•18 visualizações
Narcissism vs Leadership (1).pdf por kullmd
Narcissism vs Leadership (1).pdfNarcissism vs Leadership (1).pdf
Narcissism vs Leadership (1).pdf
kullmd•9 visualizações
Sohail Ahmed Profile por SOHAIL AHMED - The Rising STAR
Sohail Ahmed ProfileSohail Ahmed Profile
Sohail Ahmed Profile
SOHAIL AHMED - The Rising STAR•10 visualizações
What Is Psychological Safety? por Alex Clapson
What Is Psychological Safety?What Is Psychological Safety?
What Is Psychological Safety?
Alex Clapson•26 visualizações
Merger.pdf por Cristina Martin-Palomino Casanova
Merger.pdfMerger.pdf
Merger.pdf
Cristina Martin-Palomino Casanova•5 visualizações
TITAN SUBMARINE por supiriyakithuva
TITAN SUBMARINETITAN SUBMARINE
TITAN SUBMARINE
supiriyakithuva•21 visualizações
Intuitively Moving Institutions Towards Global Regulatory Resilience por Ajaz Hussain
Intuitively Moving Institutions Towards Global Regulatory Resilience Intuitively Moving Institutions Towards Global Regulatory Resilience
Intuitively Moving Institutions Towards Global Regulatory Resilience
Ajaz Hussain•78 visualizações

7 HABITS PRESENTATION ppt. 333.pptx

  • 1. Private Victories Habit -1, Be Proactive Habit-2, Begin with the End in Mind Habit-3, First things First Public Victories Habit-4, Win/Win Habit-5, First Try to understand than to be understood Habit-6, Synergy Habit-7, Sharpen the Saw Inside-Out again SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE STEPHAN R. COVEY
  • 3. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE • Principle of personal vision • Social Mirror • Between stimulus and Response. • Making and Keeping commitments • Reactivity defined • Taking initiative • Act or Be acted upon • Listening to our Language • Circle of influence / Concern • Direct, indirect and No control • Expanding Circle of influence • The HAVs and BEs • Other End of Stick
  • 4. • To visualize own programme is unique human capability, which no animal enjoys this is called “self awareness”. • This is why we can evaluate and learn from others- we can make and break our habits • We are not our feelings, moods or thoughts. The fact that we can think about these things is self-awareness. It becomes our map HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE PRINCIPLE OF PERSONAL VISION
  • 5. • The image we have of ourselves comes from social mirror • Its like reflection in crazy mirror. • They are often more projections than reflections, giving concerns and weaknesses of people who are giving input. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE SOCIAL MIRROR
  • 6. • There are three social mirrors: - – Genetic determination –Psychic determination –Environ determination • Each of these maps is based on stimulus/ response theory. Basic ideas that we are conditioned to respond in a particular way. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE SOCIAL MIRROR
  • 7. • It means we are responsible (response-able) for our own lives, our decisions, our program - we have response and initiative to make things happen • Proactive don’t blame circumstances, conditions etc. They are not reactive they carry their weather with in. • They are value driven – They are not affected by social environs. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE PROACTIVITY DEFINED
  • 8. • The ability to subordinate an impulse to a value is essence of proactive person. Proactive are influenced by exterior factors but their response is value based. • Things can hurt us physical / economy but they must not effect our character /identity. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE PROACTIVITY DEFINED
  • 9. • Frankle suggests - three central values in life: - • Experimental- that happen to us and we bring into existence. • Creative. • Attitudinal- our responses to difficulties, Highest of three attitudinal. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE PROACTIVITY DEFINED
  • 10. FRANKLE IN NAZI CAMP FRANKLE WHEN FREED
  • 12. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE TAKING INITIATIVE • Our basic nature is to act and not be acted upon. • Taking initiative means recognize our responsibility to make things happen. • Proactive muscles may be dormant but they are there. • It takes initiative to created P/PC balance and takes initiative to adopt seven habits.
  • 13. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE LISTENIING TO OUR LANGUAGE REACTIVE PROACTIVE I shall have to do it. I will choose an appropriate He makes me so mad. I control my own feelings. There is nothing I can do Lets look at the alternative. I must. I prefer
  • 14. • Excellent way of becoming self aware- look where we spend our time. We have wider concerns, Health children, and work, National debt, Nuclear etc. There are few out of control- circle of concern. There are few in our control- circle of influence. • Proactive focus on circle of influence and reactive on concern. As long as we work on circle of concern, we let circumstances; conditions control us-our circle of influence shrinks and vice versa. Proactive have circle of influence equal to circle of concern. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE CIRCLE OF CONCERN/INFLUENCE
  • 15. • Problems we face fall in one of three areas – Direct control- our behavior relationship – Indirect control- other people behavior – No control- our past or situation reality. • Direct controls are solved by Habits 1,2,3. Indirect by change our methods of dealing- Habits 4,5,6. No con accept them smilingly. “Give me courage to change things I can, Serenity to accepts those I can’t change and wisdom to know the difference.” HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE DIRECT INDIRECT AND NO CONTROL
  • 16. In selecting our response we powerfully affect circumstances. We change nature of results. Proactive are not pushy. They are smart, value driven- they read reality and they know what’s needed. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE EXPANDING CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE
  • 17. Circle of concern is full with haves and circle of influence is filled with BEs. Anytime we think problem is “out there” that thought is the problem. The change paradigm “outside in.” One of my favorites stories is one in Old Testament-Joseph- enslaved- jailed and finally became ruler of Egypt- second only to Pharaoh. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE THE HAVEs AND BEs
  • 18. If I have troubles in my marriage, what do I gain by continually confessing my wife’s sins? I immobilize myself in a – have situation. There are so many ways to work in circle of influence- be a better listener, be more loving marriage partner, be better student. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE THE HAVEs AND BEs
  • 19. • Before shifting focus on circle of influence – consider two things in circle of concern – consequences and mistakes. • We are free to choose actions but circumstances are like natural principles they come with it. • Our behavior is governed by principles living in harmony with them good (positive) consequences- violating vice versa. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE THE OTHER END OF THE STICK
  • 20. • Proactive approaches “ Acknowledge the mistake instantly correct and learn from it.” This literally turns failure into success. “Success is on the other side of failure.” • Cover up empowers first mistake- results even deeper injuries. Its’ not others or our mistakes that hurt us but its our response. Its like Chasing a poisonous snake that has bitten us. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE THE OTHER END OF THE STICK
  • 21. • At the very heart of our circle of influence is our ability to make and keep commitments. • Through self-awareness and conscience we recognize our areas of weaknesses. Then we use our imagination and independent will to act on that awareness making promises setting goals and being true to them- that build strength of character- that makes possible every other (+ve) thing. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE MAKING AND KEEPING COMMITMENTS
  • 22. • By making and keeping commitments we establish inner integrity that gives us awareness of self-control and courage and strength to accept more of responsibility for our lives our honor becomes greater than moods. Knowledge that we are responsible is foundation of all effectiveness and of every habit discussed. HABIT-1 BE PROACTIVE MAKING AND KEEPING COMMITMENTS
  • 23. • Principle of ‘personal leadership. • Things are created twice / by design or by default. • Leadership and Management – Two creators. • Re-scripting - Becoming won first Creator. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND
  • 24. • PMS – At the Center. • Principle Center. • Writing and Using PMS. • Using Whole Brain. • Ways to Tap Right Brain. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND
  • 25. • Expand Perspective. • Visualization and affirmation. • Identify Roles and Goals. • Family Msn Statement. • Org Msn Statement. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND
  • 26. • “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Homes. • Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND PRINCIPLE OF PRESONAL LEADERSHIP “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
  • 27. • Begin today with the paradigm/mind setting of end of life. All roles profession/ relationship/ religion/svc community- every thing –means start with clear destination in mind. It is very easy to get trap to daily pushing problems and forget ultimate aim – HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND What Does “begin with the end in mind” “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
  • 28. • Begin today with the paradigm/mind setting of end of life. All roles profession/ relationsh Easy to forget whether ladder is leaning against the right wall or the activity is in right jungle. Surely yours definition of success will be different from others - Attending funeral a friend asked the others what did he leave, answer was ,” He left it all.” HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND What Does “begin with the end in mind” “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
  • 29. • All things have two existences. FIRST Imaginative, and SECOND IS ON GROUND. Carpenter’s rule, Measure twice cut once. What you want to achieve as businessman, father, and spouse.. Think, think, and think. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND All things are Created Twice “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
  • 30. • If we don’t create “1st creation” using self-awareness we will be handed over the same by people/ circumstances/ conditions. We are second creature by design, of our own first creation or second creature by default of what others gave us. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND By Design OR By Default “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
  • 31. • By design we become principle centered by default… Habit 1 says: - you are the creator. Habit 2 says: - The first creation. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND By Design OR By Default “What lies behind us, what lies before us are tiny matters as compared to what lies with in us.” Oliver Wendell Ho Imagine your funeral – Eulogy going on what would you like your wife, son, companion, co-worker say about you.
  • 32. • Habit –2 is based on leadership- leadership is 1st creation. Management is 2nd creation. • Leader says we are in the wrong jungle. Manager says,” shut up we are making great progress”. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Leadership and Management Two creators
  • 33. We are more in need of a vision /compass less of a road map. Effectiveness and survival depends on direction- right jungle- not on amount of Effort. Efficient management without leadership is straightening chairs on a sinking TITANIC. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Leadership and Management Two creators
  • 34. o Proactively is based on o Self awareness o Expanded by imagination and o Conscience o Through imagination we can see world with the glasses of our potentials. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Rescripting - becoming your first Creator
  • 35. Conscience helps us take right path (principles)- self-awareness with the aid of imagination and conscience help write our script. One of the most inspiring Rescripting – ANWAR SADAAT HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Rescripting - becoming your first Creator
  • 36. ANWAR SADAAT –born, brought up in environs of haltered for ISREAL – made speeches to destroy ISRAEL- detained in CELL - 54 thought with end in mind—“ DAVID CAMP PACT.” HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Rescripting - becoming your first Creator
  • 37. Most effective way of beginning with ends in Mind writhe a personal Msn statement (PMS). It focuses on what you want (CHARACTER) and to do (CONTIBUTE AND ACHIEVEMENTS) and values on which being or doing is placed. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND PMS
  • 38. PMS is like a personal constitution – fundamentally changeless. In over 200 yrs there ve’ been 26 amendments- Ten of which are in original bill of RIGHTS. PMS is written constitution a yardstick to evaluate and directed every move and action. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND PMS
  • 39. PMS based on correct principles provides timeless strength in midst of change with it we can flow with changes with out prejudice of prejudgment. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND PMS
  • 40. To write a PMS, start from the very center of circle of influence . Here our focused efforts will achieve greatest results. This is high lvl of PC work significantly impacting efficiency of every aspect of our lives. What at center of our life will be source of our security, guidance, wisdom and power. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND AT THE CENTRE
  • 41. SECURITY- its’ sense of worth and identity. GUIDENCE- Source of direction in life, map or frame of ref. WISDOM- Perspective on life, sense of balance and understanding. It embraces judgment, discernment, and comprehension. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND AT THE CENTRE
  • 42. POWER- faculty or capacity to act. Vital energy to make choices and decisions to overcome deeply embedded habits. These FOUR are interdependent- create great force of noble personality. Weak at them you are at mercy of circumstances/ conditions/ people. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND AT THE CENTRE
  • 43. Each of us has a center. – Spouse centeredness – Family centeredness – Money centeredness – Work centeredness – Family centeredness HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND ALTERNATIVE CIRCLE
  • 44. –Possession centeredness – Pleasure centeredness – Friend/ En centeredness – Church centeredness – Self-centeredness Identify your circle – it may be combination of some circles HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND ALTERNATIVE CIRCLE
  • 45. Unlike all other centers, the center based on principles doesn’t change. Principles don’t react- they are not short cuts, quick fixes they don’t die. They are fundamental, classic truths, generic common denominators. They are bigger than people and circumstances . HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
  • 46. We are not omniscient , We are limited but guided by conscience and deciding by self awareness we can expand our knowledge being sure that the light house ( principles) won’t led us into dark/ confusion. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
  • 47. Wisdom and guidance came from correct map and map gives us direction Power comes from principle centered living its’ power of knowledgeable, self aware and proactive unrestricted by attitudes behaviors that limits others. Only real light of POWER is circumstances picking one end of stick. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
  • 48. Principles have circumstances attached to them living by tem (+ve) or otherwise. They are common to all, irrespective of our moods, choices or awareness. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
  • 49. A paradigm is like pair of glasses- out of which flows attitudes, behaviors. As principle centered individual you stand apart from the situation and evaluate options. Any decision will serve one of the other centers but with a difference. you proactively choose your option. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
  • 50. • Decision is effective since based on principles. • It contributes to ultimate aim of life. • You feel comfortable about the decision; you can focus on it and enjoy it. • A principle centered, sees differently, thinks differently. You have high proactively and highly effective life. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Principle Centre
  • 51. • Frankle detected not invented MSN in life. Each one has a conscience- gives uniqueness of our live and singular contributes that we can make the first creation. – Habit –1 says ‘ you are programmer – Habit –2 says “write the program ’ HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Writing and Using PMS
  • 52. • A PMS takes deep introspection, careful analysis, thoughtful expression and often many rewrites before – final. • Even then review it periodically to accommodate changes brought in by years. • Process of writing PMS/MS is as important as MSN itself – it forces to think thorough priority deeply, carefully and align behavior with belief. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Writing and Using PMS
  • 53. • Imagination and conscience that drive habit two are function of right brain. Research says, right and left-brain specialize different functions. • LEFT HEMISPHERE is more Logical /Verbal. It deals with Words, Parts & Specific Analysis (i.e. to break apart),Sequence Thinking & is Time Bound HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Using whole Brain
  • 54. • RIGHT BRAIN is more Intuitive , Creative, Dealing with Pictures, with whole and Relationship, with Synthesis, with Simultaneous Thinking; Its not TIME bound. • One side dominates in each individual. Ideal would be use both – That’s not easy HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Using whole Brain
  • 55. • “He who is good with hammer thinks every thing is a nail.” ABRAHAM MASLOW • We primarily live in Left hemisphere and right is subordinated. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Using whole Brain
  • 56. Quality of our 1st creation is talk/function of right brain. The more we use it more we visualize, transcend time and present circumstances to project a holistic picture of what we want to do and to be. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Ways to Tap right Brain
  • 57. Sometimes we are forced into right brain. Death of loved one, and severe illness and financial setback and we face hard questions, what is important? What I am doing. But being proactive we don’t have to wait for event to get us to right brain. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Expand Perspective
  • 58. No of ways are:- • Write your own eulogy. • Imagine 25th marriage anniversary • Imagine your retirement • As a student imagine its’ your last semester live it like a good student who wants to be remembered. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Expand Perspective
  • 59. Personal leadership begins by writing PMS, it’s an on going process of keeping vision and values before you and aligning life to most important things. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
  • 60. • A good affirmation has five ingredients:- – Personal – Positive – Present – Visual – Emotional HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
  • 61. • If I am a short tempered father, I might write something like this, “ It deeply satisfying (emotional) that I (personal) respond (present tense) with wisdom love firmness and self control (+ve) when my children misbehave” I can visualize, spend few minutes daily totally relaxed- think of instances when my children really misbehave. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
  • 62. • I visualize in detail chair, dress my child wearing, sweater I am wearing- then I imaging him doing something really stupid. I visualize myself dealing with love, self control and power- This if done on daily basis will change my behavior, Visualize is important you visualize a wrong thing result will be wrong thing. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
  • 63. “All world class athletes and peak performers are visualizers. They see it, they feel it before they actually do it. They begin with end in mind. When you are in actual situation - its not alien/foreign to you”. DR CHARLES GARFIELD HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND Visualization and Affirmation
  • 64. • Writing PMS ………the process of writing distills, crystallizes and clarifies thought and helps break whole into part. We have different roles in life. When we think we don’t think of the whole. Loosing sense of proportion and balance – natural ecology that is necessary. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND IDENTIFY ROLES AND GOALS
  • 65. • Writing PMS ( including all roles ) gives balance and harmony After selecting roles - thinks of setting goals • Now again into right brain (imagination, creativity) Goals are your values, talent, and sense of msn. • An effective goal focuses on result not activity- gives meaning to activity- influences daily routine. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND IDENTIFY ROLES AND GOALS
  • 66. • Many families are managed on basis of crises, quick fixes, instant gratification – not on sound principles- People become cynical, yelling overreacting. • Core of the family is shared vision and values – the changeless- by writing MS you gives expression to the true foundation. It gives continue, unity and direction to family. HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND FAMILY MSN STATEMENT
  • 67. • Involving every member in the process of writing is key to its effective use. ---IBM--- course run- sick man – evacuate on heli- charted plane. IBM believes in dignity of individual. • Hotel extraordinarily good svc – each one responsible –reason---evolution of OMS. Remember “NO INVOLVEMENT –NO COMMITMENT.” HABIT-2 BEGIN WITH END IN MIND ORGANIZATIONAL MSN STATEMENT
  • 68. • Principle of Personal Management. • Power of Independent Will. • Four Generations of Time Management/ • Quadrant-II • What it takes to say “NO” • Quadrant –II Tool. HABIT-3 Put First Things First
  • 69. • Becoming Quadrant –II self Manager • Living it. • Advances of 4th Generations. • Delegation • Gofer delegation. • Steward delegation. • Quadrant-II Paradigm. HABIT-3 Put First Things First
  • 70. • Answer two questions, – 1st what one thing if done (regularly) would make a tremendous +ve influence in your personal life? – 2nd What one thing ….in professional life? HABIT-3 Put First Things First Principles of Personal Mgt
  • 71. • “Habit 3 is fulfillment of habit 1&2” • Habit 1 says, “ You are creator (based on self awareness, conscience, imagination and independent will). • Habit 2 is mental creation- based on imagination- what can’t be seen, potential and conscience provides guidelines. • Habit 3-second creation –Physical –ex of independent will. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Principles of Personal Mgt
  • 72. • Leadership is right brain activity – When you are asked yourself ultimate questions- Now its time of Habit-3 The management, Left-brain activity. “Manage from left lead from right.” HABIT-3 Put First Things First Principles of Personal Mgt
  • 73. • Independent will makes effective self- management possible. To make choices and decisions. Human will is amazing thing “ they beat the odds” Empowerment comes from learning and how to use this great endowments in decisions we make every day. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Power of Independent Will
  • 74. • Level of independent will is measured by our personal integrity- “TO WALK OUR TALK.” “HONOUR WITH SELF.” • Effective mgt is putting first things first. Leadership determines first things (priority) and Mgt puts them first in day to day routine - Discipline carrying is out. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Power of Independent Will
  • 75. • For effective manager –discipline comes from within. They have will power & integrity to subdue your feelings. “COMMON DENOMINATOR OF SUCCESS” by EM GRAY, spent his life searching one common denominator. He observed, “These people never liked doing things other didn’t like but they subdued their dislike to purpose. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Power of Independent Will
  • 76. • “Organize and execute around priority” In time management each generation builds on one before it. • 1st Notes and check lists- recognizing important of things require time and energy. • 2nd Calendars and appointment books- effort to look ahead. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Four Generations of Time Mgt
  • 77. “3rd generation made significant contribution- only problem “Efficiency focus creates expectation that clash with opportunity to create rich relationship to meet human needs to enjoy spontaneous moments in daily life. There is an emerging HABIT-3 Put First Things First Four Generations of Time Mgt
  • 78. “There is an emerging 4th generation. Time management is, “MISNOMER.” “CHALLENGE IS NOT MANAGE TIME BUT OURSELVES.” To give up all planners is like “throwing baby out with bath water.” HABIT-3 Put First Things First Four Generations of Time Mgt
  • 79. Urgent Not Urgent I II IMP Crises Pressing Problems Prevention- PC activities Relationship building/Plan/Cr eative activities NOT IMP III IV Interruption/call Mail /reports/meeting Popular activities Trivia/busy work Mail/Phone calls Time wasters Pleasant activities. HABIT-3 TIME Mgt. QUADRANT II
  • 80. HABIT-3 Put First Things First TIME Mgt. QUADRANT II • Important is result focused – they are not urgent. We react to urgent. Important, require more initiative, more proactively. If we don’t practice habit 2, we will be drifted into urgent. • As long as we focus on quadrant-1 it keep getting bigger and bigger and dominates us. People beaten up by quadrant-1 escape to quadrant IV. Yet individuals who spent time in quadrant III, Urgent but not important “thinking they are in Quadrant - I.”
  • 81. HABIT-3 Put First Things First TIME Mgt. QUADRANT II • People spending life in quadrant III and IV, spend irresponsible life. Effective people stay out of III and IV; they shrink I to its proper size and spent time in quadrant II. II is ‘Heart” of effective management. Activities incl: - – Building relationship – Planning – Exercising – Preparation
  • 82. HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO • Only time to get for Quadrant-II is from III and IV. To say, “Yes” to II you will have to say “NO” to pleasant III and IV. • Keep in mind you are always saying NO to something if not to III and IV – then it’s to II. • Question is if you are to falter, where ll’ you: - – Inability to priority. – Inability to organize around priority. – Lack of discipline to execute.
  • 83. HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO • Most people (said) will say ‘discipline’-I would say NO – its • Habit- 2 priority. This has not planted into your heart – you are not owned it. There are many who recognize important Quadrant II but they don’t have PMS to support their efforts.
  • 84. HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO • They work on attitude, behaviors (not roots). If you are money /spouse/ friend they will throw you in Quadrant III and I reacting to foreign forces. • Your independent will alone can’t discipline you. As maxim goes “form follows function” similarly “mgt follows leadership.” Its’ not possible to say NO to the activities of Quadrant III and IV, if you don’t have burning YES inside you.
  • 85. HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO • 3rd generation- clarifies values and setting goals priority activities- this is where time mgt field is today. Critical limitations: - – Daily planning –‘symbolizes’ urgency – it doesn’t question important of daily activities. Its basically priority quadrant I and III and crises of the day. –3rd generation lacks realism –over scheduling day- frustration and escape to quadrant-IV.
  • 86. HABIT-3 Put First Things First What it takes to Say NO Quadrant-II organizers need to meet six criteria: - • Coherence • Balance • Quadrant -II focus • A people dimension • Flexibility • Portability
  • 87. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Tools Coherence Harmony between vision and msn and roles and goal, priority and plans, desires and discipline. Keep space for PMS on planner to remind yourself.
  • 88. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Tools Balance Success in one area doesn’t compensate failure in other.
  • 89. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Tools Quadrant -II focus Planner must encourage quadrant-II Organize WEEKLY BASIS –more balance and context than daily planning Business/ education and many facets of society plan on weekly basis Religions every 7th day. “The key is not to priority what’s on your schedule, but to schedule your priority.”
  • 90. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Tools • A people dimension: - Your planner must deal with people as well. Quadrant –II requires subdued of schedules to people. • Flexibility: - Tool should be servant not master. • Portability: -you may want to review your PMS while riding the bus. Many 3rd generation tools can easily be adapted.
  • 91. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Quadrant –II organization involves for key activities: - • Identify roles • Selecting goals • Schedules • Daily adapting
  • 92. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Identify Roles Write down key roles: - • Individual • Husband/ Father • Manager • Wife / Mother • Religion • Salesperson, etc.
  • 93. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Selecting Goals You can see ahead with goals in roles and time restrict them. Writing PMS 2xhrs weekly – and 30x mins weekly to examine Can also review appointments already made - to keep / relegate OR reschedule “SHARPEN THE SAW”- & after writing all roles you can put other things around these goals.
  • 94. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Daily Living Taking a few minutes each morning to review you schedule can put you in touch with value based decisions you made as you organize week As well as unanticipated factors that may have come up 3rd generation 1,2,3and A, B, C priority gives needed order to planner
  • 95. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Living It • Habit 1, says, “You are programmer” • Habit 2 says, “ Write the program” • Habit 3, says, “ Manage/ live the program”
  • 96. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Living It Living it is primarily function of independent will, our self-discipline, integrity and commitment We are not OMNISCIENT there will be changes to our schedule - We will do it with inner peace since we work for principles and schedules are our servants
  • 97. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Becoming Quadrant II Self Manager Living It Remember “ effective with people and efficient with things” Remember frustration is a function of expectations and expectations are reflection of social mirror – not our own values and priorities.
  • 98. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Advantages of 4th Generation People are fed up with 3rd generation:- – It defies principles that people are more important – 4th generation of self-mgt is more advance than third in five ways: - • Its principle centered • Its conscience oriented • It defines your unique mission including values and long-term goals • It helps balance by identifying roles • It gives greatest context through weekly organization.
  • 99. HABIT-3 Put First Things First DELEGATION- INCREASING PAND PC We accomplish all we do through delegation either to time or to other people. If we delegate to time, we think efficiency. If we delegate to the people, we think effectively Effective delegation to other is perhaps the single most powerful high leverage activity there is
  • 100. HABIT-3 Put First Things First DELEGATION- INCREASING PAND PC Delegation involves others- its’ public victory Since it involves personal management so its’ included here A manager can delegate not producer who values eggs only When a producer spends an hour produces one unit and manager spending one hour produces 20 units Delegation is Fulcrum
  • 101. HABIT-3 Put First Things First DELEGATION- INCREASING PAND PC Out Put Force No Delegation Delegated
  • 102. HABIT-3 Put First Things First TYPES OF DELEGATION- GOFFER DELEGATIONS Gofer delegation is “go for this- go for that….” They are producers. They focus on methods. Its’ one on one supervision STEWARD DELEGATION It’s focused on results instead of methods. Gives people choice of methods and makes them responsible. It takes more time in beginning but its’ time well invested
  • 103. HABIT-3 Put First Things First STEWARD DELEGATION- Steward delegation involves clear, up front mutual understanding and commitment regarding expectations in five areas: - • Desired results • Guidelines • Resources • Accountability • Consequences
  • 104. HABIT-3 Put First Things First STEWARD DELEGATION- My seven year - Stephan-Garden –green and clean- No response Why daddy, can you help me- garbage- it worked. Trust is highest form of human motivation. It brings out very best - it takes time, Trg and Patience Focus is on effectiveness not efficiency Certainly you can do better than your kid but – Don’t you want to empower him? .
  • 105. HABIT-3 Put First Things First STEWARD DELEGATION- With immature people specify fewer desired result more guidelines, resources, accountability, interviews and apply immediate consequences.
  • 106. HABIT-3 Put First Things First Quadrant II Paradigm Every one habit (seven) is a quadrant –II one. It deals with important tings if done regularly will make tremendous difference in our lives.
  • 107. HABIT-4 Think win/win • Principle of personal leadership • Six paradigms of human Interaction • Best Option • Win/Win or no deal • Five dimensions of Win/Win • Win / Win Management Training • Win/Win Performance Agreement.
  • 108. HABIT-4 Think win/win Principle of Interpersonal Leadership Once I worked for a company …… Stephan, they are selfish… I felt the same…Manager had a picture on wall. Racing Horses..Best employ was to win “ Bermuda” trip. Here was problem- they taught win/win but failed to practice it- Here only one was winner and all (rest) were losers. Habit of effective interpersonal leadership is Think Win/Win.
  • 109. HABIT-4 Think win/win win/win Win/Win is a frame of mind, where mutual benefit in all human interactions is sought. All parties fell good and committed. Dichotomous thinking is flawed – win/win says, there is plenty for every one. Its’ belief in third alternative, its’ not your way, not mine way – its’ better way. •Lose/Win •Lose/Lose •Win Win/Win or No Deal, Win/Win is not a technique, its’ philosophy of human interaction
  • 110. HABIT-4 Think win/win win/lose • Its’ race to Bermuda- you win- I lose or I win you lose. • Win/Lose are prone to use position, power, and credentials to get their way. • Win comparisons are made among children we script win/ lose in them. • They are communicated that they are not intrinsically lovable. •Lose/Win •Lose/Lose •Win Win/Win or No Deal, Win/Win is not a technique, its’ philosophy of human interaction
  • 111. HABIT-4 Think win/win win/lose • Academic world reinforces win/lose scripting, a competition not cooperation is at the heart of education system. • Similarly athletics…it is true with law. Without resorting to peaceful means people resort to sue someone. • BUT most of the life is not competition- “Who is winning in your marriage?”
  • 112. HABIT-4 Think win/win lose/win • “I am looser”, “step on me”, “I am peace maker”. • No standard, no demands, n visions. • They seek strength from popular or acceptance. They have little courage to express their feelings- they are easily intimidated.
  • 113. HABIT-4 Think win/win lose/win • Win/lose, love Lose/win they are fed on them. • But Lose /win bury feelings which never die – surface in an even uglier way • Disproportionate rage, over reacting and cynicism or common. • It affects self-esteem and relationship with others. Many swing back and forth between win/lose and lose/ win.
  • 114. HABIT-4 Think win/win lose/lose • When two lose/win face each other – result lose/lose • Divorce husband was order to pay half the price of items to wife. He sold a 10,000$ worth car for 25$ and paid half to wife? • Loses/Lose is philosophy of war- of highly dependent personal who don’t have any inner direction
  • 115. HABIT-4 Think win/win win They not necessary want somebody to lose. Their only concern self interest- leaving others to secure theirs.
  • 116. HABIT-4 Think win/win Best Option • Depends, in football both can’t win. You may resort to Lose/win to genuinely affirm someone”. • There will be occasions when you can’t afford losing - life of your child in danger. So the best choice depends on reality. • Win/lose in long run , eventually is a lose/lose. In short, in the long run its not win/win, all others will fail.
  • 117. HABIT-4 Think win/win Win/Win or No Deal • Means if no mutual benefit we disagree agreeably NO DEAL. • No expectation, performances or contracts. • It provides tremendous emotional freedom in family relationship. If family cannot agree on which video- no deal – they can do something else.
  • 118. HABIT-4 Think win/win Win/Win or No Deal • In the beginning of business deal its’ most realistic approach. But not, when continuing this relationship, in business. • There are situation when no deal is not an option, I would love to have compromised win/win than to abandon my children.
  • 119. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win Win/win involves exercise of all human endowments: - • Self awareness • Imagination • Conscience • Independent will, it involves mutual – learning influence and benefits.
  • 120. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win • Win/win relationship begins with character and moves towards relationship, out of which flows agreement. Its’ nurtured in an environment where structures and systems are based on win/win. And it involves processes we can’t achieve win/win ends with win/lose or lose/win means.
  • 121. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win Win/win relationship begins with character and moves towards relationship, out of which flows agreement. Its’ nurtured in an environment where structures and systems are based on win/win. And it involves processes we can’t achieve win/win ends with win/lose or lose/win means.
  • 122. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win CHARACTER RELATIIONS AGREEMENT SUPPORTING SYS PROCESSES 1 2 3 4 5
  • 123. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win CHARACTER Integrity Maturity Abundance Mentality Relationship Agreement
  • 124. HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Integrity Value we place on ourselves. Developed by habit 1,2,and 3. We develop self- awareness and independent will by making and keeping meaningful promises.
  • 125. HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Maturity • Balance between courage and consideration. • If a person can express his feelings and convictions with courage balance with consideras5te for others feelings and considers he is mature • Courage – Golden egg, consideration-PC
  • 126. HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Maturity • Going win/win is tough; you have to be nice and courageous, Empathic , confident – & brave • If I am high on Courage, Low on consideration I will think? Win /Lose
  • 127. HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Maturity • To compensate for my lack of internal maturity and emotional strength might be from my credentials, seniority etc. • If I am high on consideration, low on courage I will think Lose/win.
  • 128. HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Abundance Mentality • Paradigm that there is plenty there for every one, it flows from personal worth and security • Opposite to scarce mentality • Results in sharing of prestige recognition, profits.
  • 129. HABIT-4 Think win/win 3x Character Traits for Win/Win Abundance Mentality • Opens up possibility, options, alternatives and creativity. • Public victory is an outgrowth of Abundance Mentality paradigm.
  • 130. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win RELATIONSHIP • Without trust best solution is compromise • But when EBA is high, credibility is no longer an issue. So we are focused on issues, not personalities or positions. • Even though we see things differently- we are ready to listen each other.
  • 131. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win RELATIONSHIP • Old/Young lady- but We respect it is third alternative, synergistic one • Dealing with win/lose is test of win/win the focus should be circle of influence • You make deposits into EBA. Stronger you are, more genuine your character- Higher your level of proactively more you are commitment to win/win- more influence you enjoy.
  • 132. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win RELATIONSHIP • Its’ beyond transactional leadership into transformational leadership –transformed individual involved as well as relationship • If no way out- you are NO DEAL • An arrangement means very little in letter without the character and relationship based to sustain it.
  • 133. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win AGREEMENTS • From relationship flow agreements that give definition and direction to win/win • They are called Performance agreements or partnership agreements - from hovering supervision to self supervision- from position to partners
  • 134. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win AGREEMENTS • Delegation (five elements) provides structure for win/win agreement between employer and employees- between groups of people cooperation focused on common objective.
  • 135. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win AGREEMENTS • Following five elements WHICH give win/win a life of their own, are : - –Desired results –Guidelines –Resources –Accountability –Consequences
  • 136. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN MGT TRAINING • Projects of banking institution COST $7,50,000 selecting students…Twenty-two weeks assigned in various department over six month…. and then the appointment followed. • Our assignment .. to evaluate program… difficulty in getting clear picture. What they should be able to do at the end of course?
  • 137. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN MGT TRAINING • Answers were vague and often contradictory. Training program dealt with methods. We based our program on different paradigm called, “ learner –Controlled instruction.” • It was a win/win ….. Involved identifying specific objectives ….. Criteria …guidelines, resources, accountability.
  • 138. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN MGT TRAINING • Consequences promotion to assistance manager. 100% objectives … consolidated to 39. • Trainees highly motivated by promotion and salary. We gave them criteria guidelines resources—finished 3-1/2 weeks.
  • 139. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN MGT TRAINING • Administration resisted. How they finished in 4 weeks what took us six months. • Objective were added, they took 1-1/2 week (total 5 weeks). • They went to libraries; to department to teachers… they brainstormed and cooperated.
  • 140. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN PERFORMANCE AGREEMENT • Focus on result not methods. People evaluate themselves. • Delegation is central activity of management. Manager can serve like a pace car. • HE can get things going and then can get out of the way. His job then on is to remove oil spills
  • 141. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win WIN/WIN PERFORMANCE AGREEMENT • He can increase his span of control. HE can supervise 20, 30, 50 or more • IN such agreement consequences become natural or logical results of performance. People involved know them • Every thing is clear from beginning, clear expectation- they are liberating- only personal integrity and trust can maintain team.
  • 142. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win SYSTEMS • Win/Win needs support of system. You get what you reward, win/lose or lose/win. • “A large real state organization- in ME- 800 sales representatives -Awards – Most sales - 40 were awarded… 760 lost….. organization/ aligned system to win/win . Criteria set .. Next year out of 1000, 800 received awards – each one produced much more than last years' 40 combined
  • 143. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win SYSTEMS • For win/win, training, plan communication, budgeting and information all systems must support it and compensation system- they all are to be abased on win/win • So often the problem is with the system not people. Good people in bad system can’t produce.
  • 144. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win PROCESSES • There’s no way to achieve win/win with win/lose or with lose /win • Essence of principled negotiation is to separate personal from the problem- focus on interests no positions.
  • 145. HABIT-4 Think win/win Five Dimensions of Win/Win PROCESSES For win/win solution following four steps are suggested: - • See problem from others point of view. • Identify key issues and concerns. • What results • Identify options to achieve those results.
  • 146. PUBLIC VICTORIES • Paradigm of Interdependence • EBA • Six Major Deposits • Laws of Love and Life • P- Problems are PC- Opportunities • Habits of Interdependence
  • 147. PUBLIC VICTORIES PARADIGM OF INTERDEPENDENCE • There can be no friendship with out confidence and no confidence with out integrity”. SAMUEL JOHNSON • Private victories precede Public victories, independence before interdependence. Algebra before Calculus • If you are not a success with yourself you can’t be successful with others
  • 148. • Self-discipline and self-mastery are foundation for good relationship with others • Real ingredient of good relationship is not what we say or do but what we are. So place to begin good relationship is inside ourselves, our circle of influence our character PUBLIC VICTORIES PARADIGM OF INTERDEPENDENCE
  • 149. • Interdependence opens up worlds of opportunities, rich associations for learning, love…. Its’ also where we feel greatest pain, frustration, road blocks to happiness and success. • WE can often live for years with chronic pain of our lack of vision, leadership or mgt, because pain is chronic, we get used to it; we learn to live with it. PUBLIC VICTORIES PARADIGM OF INTERDEPENDENCE
  • 150. • But our interactions with others problems are acute, we can’t live with it. We resort to quick fixes. Personality Ethic. • But until we stop treating symptoms, we can’t get to the solution. We need P/PC balance. PUBLIC VICTORIES PARADIGM OF INTERDEPENDENCE
  • 151. • Its’ amount of Trust that’s’ been built up in relationship • If I make (EBA) deposits with you through courtesy, kindness, honesty and keeping my commitments. I build up a reserve- my mistakes will be compensated by this (EBA) reserve PUBLIC VICTORIES EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
  • 152. • “When trust account is high comm is easy instant and effective” • If trust level is low I am walking on a mine field. I measure every word, its’ a tension city, a memo haven. • People live in compromise- only sex, children and social pressures or image protection can save the marriage PUBLIC VICTORIES EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
  • 153. • If things are still not taken care off- “fight or flight”. Marriage most intimate most potentially rich, joyful, satisfying and productive relationship between two people on earth • P/PC lighthouse is there we can either break ourselves against it or use it to our advantage PUBLIC VICTORIES EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
  • 154. • Probably most important deposit can be made by listening just listening- listening to understand • Its’ harder requires patience to establish roots after no body pulls a flower out to see how roots are coming. PUBLIC VICTORIES EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
  • 155. • Understand the individual • Attending to the little things • Keeping commitments • Clarifying Expectations • Showing Personal integration • Apologizing sincerely; when you make a withdrawal. PUBLIC VICTORIES SIX MAJOR DEPOSITS
  • 156. • This most important deposit, key to all other deposits. • My friend’s son developed avid interest in baseball, my friend spent a lot of money and time to go and witness a tournament spread over six weeks. • I asked him, “Do you like base ball?” “NO” he said, “but I like my son that much. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Understanding the Individual
  • 157. • What is important to other person is as important to you as the other person is to you • When we decide what others need we project our intentions on the behavior of others? • Golden rule says, “Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.” PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Understanding the Individual
  • 158. In relationship the little things are the bug things. “I remember going for movie with two of my sons. In he middle of movie Sean (younger- 4) went to sleep. We came out, it was cold I took off my coat and wrapped it around Sean; Stephan (6-years) was looking … next day …. Stephan broke into tears …. Daddy will you take care of me as you took care of Sean, if I fell asleep and felt cold.” PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Attending Little Things
  • 159. • Keeping commitment a major deposit and vice versa • Probably the biggest withdrawal is to make a promise, which is important to him and then not to come through it • If promise can’t be kept explain the situation thoroughly and get released from commitment PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Keeping Commitments
  • 160. • Cause of almost all relationship problem is ambiguous expectation around roles and goals • Many expectations are implicit- like expectation of pair out of marriage. • But when we assume our expectations are understood (without stating) this creates (-ve) energy. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Clarifying Expectations
  • 161. • Deposit is make expectations explicit and clear in the beginning • Takes investment of time, effort up front, saves great amount of time and effort down the road. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Clarifying Expectations
  • 162. • Personal integrity creates trust and is the basis of many different kinds of deposits, Integrity is not mere honesty. • Honesty is telling the truth, in other words, conforming our words to reality. Integrity is conforming reality to our words- other words, keeping promises fulfilling expectations PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Showing Personal Integrity
  • 163. • Requiring an integrity character, oneness, primarily with self but also with life, one of the most important ways to manifest integrity, “Be loyal to those who are not present.” Key to ninety-nine is one • Integrity means you treat people with same yardstick – People start trusting you. “Its’ greater to be trusted than to be loved.”. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Showing Personal Integrity
  • 164. • “Its’ the weak who are cruel, gentleness can be expected from; the strong” LEO RASKIN • A person must possess himself and have a deep sense of security in fundamental principles and values in order to genuinely apologize. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Apologize sincerely after mistake
  • 165. To be a deposit an apology must be sincere and it must be perceived as such.. People can forgive mistake but not the mistake of heart the ill intentions, the cover up. PUBLIC VICTORIES DEPOSITS – Apologize sincerely after mistake
  • 166. • When we deposit unconditional love, we live laws of love; we encourage others to live laws of life • Our unconditional love help others feel secure, safe, validated and affirmed in their essential worth, indent and integrity. PUBLIC VICTORIES LLAW OF LIFE AND LAW OF LOVE
  • 167. • When we counsel, when we plead, we set limits and consequences. But we love regardless. • “Its’ more noble to give yourself completely to one individual than to labor diligently for the salvation of masses.” DAG HAMMARSKJOLD SGUN. PUBLIC VICTORIES LLAW OF LIFE AND LAW OF LOVE
  • 168. • When parents see problems of their children as opportunities to build relationship. It changes parent child interaction. • Gives parents more leverage and children a sense that they are valued. It is true for business and other department. PUBLIC VICTORIES LLAW OF LIFE AND LAW OF LOVE
  • 169. Its’ impossible to achieve public victory with popular win/win negotiation ‘ techniques’ or ‘ reflective listening’ techniques has focus on ‘personality and truncate character. PUBLIC VICTORIES HABITS OF INTERDEPENDENCE
  • 170. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND • Principles of Empathic listening. • Character and communication. • Empathic Listening. • Diagnose before Prescription. • Four Autobiographical responses. • Under sting and Perception • Then seek to understand • One on One.
  • 171. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Principle of Empathic Listening Suppose you develop eyes trouble- visit optometrist – After brief listening he hands you over his glasses saying “ These are good and served him good for ten years.” Similarly, how we often diagnose before we prescribe in communication? WE want to fix things with good advice- failing to diagnose. Most important principle I have learned in field of interpersonal relationship, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”
  • 172. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Basics of Communication Four basic types of communication: - • Reading • Written • Speaking • Listening
  • 173. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Basics of Communication We spent years learning, reading, writing and speaking. But what about listening? • Real key to your influence is your example, - it flows out of character- not people say about you. • Character radiates and communication- and if your private performance doesn’t square with your public performance, its very hard for me to open up with you.
  • 174. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Basics of Communication And unless I open up, can you counsel me. You may say you appreciate me, but how can you appreciate me when you don’t even understand me? You can’t do it with techniques. You will have to build the skills of empathic listening.
  • 175. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening • “Seeking first to Understand” involves a very deep shift in paradigm. • Most people listen to reply. They are either speak or preparing to speak. • A father once told me,” I can’t understand my kind. He just won’t listen to me”. “I thought had to understand another person, you needed to listen to him”.
  • 176. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening When other person speaks, we are usually Listening at one of four levels: - • Ignoring • Pretending • Selective listening • Alternative listening. • The fifth and highest level is Empathic Listening.
  • 177. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Empathic Listening is not referring to “Active” or “Reflective” listening. These last two levels may not project your autobiography- but motive of listening is autobiographical. Empathic listening means listening with intent to understand. Its’ getting into other man’s frame of reference.
  • 178. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Empathy is not Sympathy. Sympathy is form of agreement, judgment (Mountaineers example - sympathy/empathy). Sympathy makes people dependent. Unlike sharing Empathy is understanding other person’s position emotionally/intellectually.
  • 179. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Experts estimate: - • 10%- of comm represented by words. • 30%- sounds. • 60%- body language. • In empathic listening you listen with your ears, your eyes and heart. You listen for behavior. You use right brain and left-brain. You sense, intuit and feel.
  • 180. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Empathic listening is a great EBA deposit- it gives a person “Psychological Air”. “Satisfied needs don’t motivate”- Next to physical survival is “Psychological Aurvival”- i.e. to be understood, to be affirmed, to be validated to be appreciated. When you listen with empathy you give psychological air to other person.
  • 181. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Empathic Listening Seeking first to understand, diagnose before you prescribe- it is hard. Its’ easier to had over your pair of glasses. Empathic listening is risky. It takes a great deal of security to go into deep listening experience because you open yourself- You may be influence. To understand. Habit 1,2,and 3 give you required inner core – the changeless.
  • 182. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Diagnose before you Prescribe If you don’t have confidence in diagnose you won’t have confidence in prescription. A good lawyer almost writes the opposite attorney’s case before writes his own. Good engineer evaluates stresses at work, before designing bridges… Key to good judgment is understanding. By judging first a person will never fully understand.
  • 183. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Autobiographical Responses Because we listen autobiographically we tend to respond in one of four ways • We evaluate • We probe • We advise • We interpret
  • 184. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Autobiographical Responses We try to figure out people, to explain their motives, their behavior, based on our motives and behaviors. Constant probing is one of he reason parents don’t get close to their children. He knows the moment he comes out with the problem he, “didn’t I tell you.”
  • 185. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Autobiographical Responses Empathic listing involves four developing stages: • 1st-least effective is “mimic content” • 2nd-rephrase content-little more effective. • 3rd-you reflect feelings. • 4th, 2nd, 3rd , you rephrase and reflect feelings.
  • 186. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Four Autobiographical Responses As a doctor you can’t say, “I am in hurry, take this diagnose, I can’t diagnose.” I remember one time writing in a room on North shore of Oahu, Hawaii. I had opened two windows- wind picked up- scattering my unnumbered pages. I trying frantically to run after them- Finally I realized to close one window by spending 10 seconds.
  • 187. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Understanding and Perception As you learn to listen deeply - You see young lady/ I see old lady and both can be right. You may look world through, “spouse center” and I “money center” –You may be scripted in “Abundance Mentality”, I in “scarce Mentality”
  • 188. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Understanding and Perception You may approach with “ right brain”, I “left brain”. We lived for years on our paradigms and thought only “we know facts” But now we can work together- Answer is Habit- 5. Its’ first step in process of win/win. Even other person is not coming from same paradigm, seek first to understand.
  • 189. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Then Seek to be Understood Knowing how to be understood is other part of Habit-5. Equally important to reach win/win solution Seeking to understand requires consideration- and to be understood requires courage. Win/win requires high degree of both. Early
  • 190. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND Then Seek to be Understood Greeks had magnificent philosophy. • Ethos- Faith people have in you • Pathos- Empathic side- feeling • Logos-Logic- reasoning part of presentation Sequence is important people go straight to Logos.
  • 191. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND One on One Habit-5 is in center of your circle of influence. Don’t waste time in circle of concern Habit –5 is inside-out approach. When you listen empathically you become inalienable- key to influence is to become influence-able
  • 192. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND One on One Spend time on children, One on one. Listen to them; understand them. Build EBA, give air Go out with spouse on a regular basis. Have dinners. Listen to each other, seek to understand. See life through each other eyes
  • 193. HABIT-5 FIRST SEEK TO UNDERSTAND One on One Similarly in business spend time with each employ. When you listen you learn. When we deeply listen each other- creative solution and third alternative Our differences become stepping-stones for synergy.
  • 194. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY • Synergy of creative Cooperation • Synergic communication • Synergy in class room • Synergy in Business • Synergy and communication • Negative Synergy.
  • 195. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY • Valuing the Difference. • Force field Analysis • All Nature is Synergy • Fishing for the 3rd Alternative.
  • 196. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION I take as my guide through hope of a saint: - • “ In crucial things, unity • In important things, diversity • In all things, generosity.” GEORGE BUSH Exercise of all other habits prepares us for ht habit of Synergy.
  • 197. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION Synergy- highest activity in all life- true tests of all other habits It focuses on • Four human endowments • Win/win • Skill of empathic communication.
  • 198. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION On toughest challenge we face in life- catalyzes, unifies and unleashes the greatest powers with people Synergy -? Its’, “the whole is greater then the sum of its parts.”
  • 199. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION Creative process terrifying - you don’t know exactly where its’ going to lead - confront an entirely new and unknown wilderness. You become pathfinder, opening new possibilities, new territories, and new continents.
  • 200. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY PRINCIPLES OF CREATIVE COOPERATION Synergy is everywhere in nature. The very way a man and woman bring a child into the world is synergistic. Essence of synergy is value the difference- Build on them. Synergy can create new script for the next generation- less protective, less adversarial less selfish- more open, more trusting.
  • 201. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY COMM Comm synergy opens mind, heart and expression o to new possibilities, alternatives and options Many people never experienced a moderate degree of synergy in their family life. They wasted their life- because they never tapped great potential laying in them.
  • 202. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY COMM An occasional /accidental synergistic event may form part of their memory but That is “ a miracle” to them But these things can be produced regularly. But it requires enormous personal security, openness and a spirit of adventure.
  • 203. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY COMM Since creative endeavors are somewhat unpredictable, seem ambiguous and unless people have high tolerance for ambiguity and get their security from integrity to principles and inner values they find it unnerving and unpleasant to be involved in highly creative enterprises.
  • 204. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY IN CL ROOM There are times neither teacher knows nor students are sure what’s going to happen. In an open environ comes brainstorming, where spirit of evolution is subdued to spirit of creativity, imagination and intellectual network. Synergy is collective agreement to subdued old scripts and to write a new one.
  • 205. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY IN CL ROOM Synergy sometimes leads to harsh ugly facts of life- and we dread it- we tend to be more protective Its’ like administrator who as a reaction to few individuals misuse /abuse of rules drafts new rules to limit the freedom of all
  • 206. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY IN CL ROOM The more empathic you are, more open are you- providing security to others to open up and they express Themselves People with half sentences start reading each other completely – Opening new doors of …….
  • 207. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY IN BUSINESS Far eastern philosophy, “we seek not to imitate masters, rather we seek what they sought.”
  • 208. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY & COMM Synergy comm attitude is, “if a person of you intelligence and competence and commitment disagree with me, then there must be something to your disagreement that I don’t understand and I need to understand”
  • 209. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY & COMM TRUST CO OPERATION Defensive Respectful Win/Win
  • 210. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY SYNERGY & COMM • Defensive means = 1+1 =1(or less) • Respectful = 1+1 = 2 • Synergy = 1+1 = 8 OR 16 OR 50+.
  • 211. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FISHING FOR THIRD ALTERNATIVE How comm matters in interpersonal relationship, “ Its’ vacation time, Husband wants his family and children to go (long planned) to country camp and fishing. Children are excited about it but wife wants to go to see her ailing mother…… “She is not all that ill, and she has your sister- we have been planning for so long”
  • 212. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FISHING FOR THIRD ALTERNATIVE “My mom is more important then fishing, and she is my mother too” she retards If they have high deposits they understand each other’s position. They can camp near her mother’s town. They can divide leave (not family). They can plan to spend a week with her mother after wards
  • 213. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FISHING FOR THIRD ALTERNATIVE And if they see it differently this will breed discontentment, polarization and withdrawal from EBA They can never go for middle way- the 3rd alternative When they understand each other they are on the same side and problem on the other side. Husband understands wife’s’ feelings and wife understand him and children’s’
  • 214. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY NEGATIVE SYNERGY Third alternative is major paradigm shift from dichotomous approach. Dependent people have high need to clone others. They don’t know the very strength of relationship is having others point of view Unity is complementation not sameness, sameness is uncreative.
  • 215. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY NEGATIVE SYNERGY Being principled makes us whole- Integrated, We have access to both intuitive, creative and visual right brain and analytical, logical left- brain And when the whole brain is working – life is not just logical, it’s emotional too. Manage from the left lead from the right Can you have children if you don’t value the difference? Its’ an act of SYNERGY.
  • 216. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY NEGATIVE SYNERGY Being principled makes us whole- Integrated, We have access to both intuitive, creative right brain and analytical, logical left-brain And when the whole brain is working – life is not just logical, it’s emotional too. Manage from the left lead from the right Can you have children if you don’t value the difference? Its’ an act of SYNERGY.
  • 217. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE Key is- to realize - every one sees the world not as it’s but as he is. To be truly effective - know own limitations and recognizes others potentials/resources. It adds to knowledge When we are left to our own brain/experience we are short on data. Is it logical that two people disagree and both are right- its’ not logical its’ psychological
  • 218. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE Young lady /old lady- we interpret differently because we are conditioned as such Unless we value the differences and recognize that life is not always either – or- we can’t transcend this condition When we differ – I say OK let me see how you see it. If two have same opinions one is unnecessary
  • 219. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE When I talk to somebody who differs, it :- • Adds to my knowledge • Affirm you, I create synergy
  • 220. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE Once upon a time animals decided they must do something heroic --- Adopted and activity curriculum.. Duck was excellent in swimming but—Rabbit was at top in running but---- Squirrel was good in climbing but----Eagle a problem ---- child --- On top at climbing but insisted on using his own means to do it. At the end of the year an abnormal eel
  • 221. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY VALUING THE DIFFERENCE an abnormal eel that could swim exceedingly well and could also run, climb and fly a little had the highest average and was valediction. The dogs stayed out of school and fought the tax levy because administration would not add digging and burrowing to curriculum. They sent their children to private schools.
  • 222. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS Synergy; is powerful in dealing with (-ve) forces that works against growth and change. Sociologist KURT LEWIN developed a “force field Analysis”
  • 223. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS DRIVING RESTRAINING
  • 224. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS Driving forces generally are (+ve) reasonable, logical conscious and economical Juxtaposition (-ve) forces are often (-ve), emotional, illogical, unconscious and social/psychological Both sets are real and must be taken into account
  • 225. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS To improve upon its’ necessary to add to (+ve) forces, but you will have to act on (- ve) forces to reduce/eliminate them Adding to (+ve) forces alone will bring some temporarily results – in long run that will not work - It’s like pressing against the spring
  • 226. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS But when you introduce synergy, you use Motive of Habit-4, Skill of Habit–5, and Interaction of Habit-6 to work directly on restraining forcers As a result new vision, shared goals are created
  • 227. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY ALL NATURE IS SYNERGISTIC Although you can’t control paradigm of others a great deal of synergy is within your circle of influence Your internal synergy is completely in your circle of influence You can respect both – analytic and creative side of yours You can use their difference to catalyze creativity
  • 228. HABIT- 6 SYNERGY ALL NATURE IS SYNERGISTIC You can use their difference to catalyze creativity Use others’ difference to improve /expand your knowledge to improve upon your point of view
  • 229. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL - SHARPEN THE SAW • Principles of Balance Renewal • Four dimensions of Renewal • Physical • Spiritual • Social/emotional • Scripting Others • Balance in Renewal • Synchronize in Renewal • Upward spiral
  • 230. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL PRINCIPLES OF BALANCE SELF RENEWAL “Sometimes when I consider what tremendous consequences come from little things… I am tempted to think …. There are no little things.”
  • 231. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL PRINCIPLES OF BALANCE SELF RENEWAL Suppose you were to come upon someone in the woods working feverishly to saw down a tree “How long have you been doing it?” “Over five hours” “Why don’t you take five minutes break to sharpen the saw?” “I don’t have the time to sharpen the saw”
  • 232. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL Habit-7 is personal PC. It’s preserving and enhancing. Its renewing four dimensions, physical, spiritual, social and mental
  • 233. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL Physical: - Exercise, Nutrition, Stress mgt Spiritual: - Value clarification and cmt, study and meditation. Social/Emotional: - Service, Empathy, Sync and Intrinsic security. Mental: - Reading, visualization, planning and writing
  • 234. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL Ex is Quadrant-II activity, its’ not urgent- as a result - sooner or later we find ourselves in Quadrant-I- dealing with health problems and crises It requires 30 mins every 2nd day and it tremendously effects complete week And it needs no special equipment
  • 235. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL A good ex program attends three areas: - Endurance Aerobic ex. Min fitness is to keep heartbeat for 30 mins at 100 pulse/min. Ideally you should try to raise your heart rate. It’s accepted to be 220 less age. If the age is 30yrs, the formula will be: - 220-30 = 190x 0.6 = 114
  • 236. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL FOUR DIMENSIONS OF BALANCE RENEWAL Flexibility It comes through stretching – warm up - before and after stretching Strength Pull-ups, push-ups, sit ups and weights. You won’t like it but be proactive whether its’ raining or any other problem
  • 237. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPRITUAL DIMENSION Renewing spiritual dimension gives ldrshp to life. It’s your core, center, and cmt to your value system Immersion in great literature or great music can provide a similar renewal of the spirit for some
  • 238. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPIRITUAL DIMENSION Arthur Gordon story when he had lost interest in life – it was growing worse day by day Finally when doctor couldn’t find any thing wrong with him instructed him to follow his advice for one day He gave him four prescriptions and told him – go to the place you liked most and read them at 9, 12, 15 and 18’ O clock respectively
  • 239. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPIRITUAL DIMENSION Next morning went to beach, • First prescription “listen carefully”…… began listening sounds and silence it gave him inner peace. • Second prescription “Try reaching back.” • Third prescription It read, “Examine your motives”.
  • 240. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPIRITUAL DIMENSION At first he was defensive …. Then he wrote, “If ones motives are wrong nothing can be right --- and the true motive is service.” • Fourth prescription “ Write your worries on the sand”. They all were washed away by waves
  • 241. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SPIRITUAL DIMENSION “I have so much to do today, I will need to spend another hour on my knees” MARTIN LUTHER “The greatest battles of life are fought out daily in silent chambers of soul”
  • 242. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL MENTAL DIMENSION After leaving formal education we let our minds atrophy- not doing series reading, no writing - we spend time watching TV Time consumption by TV is 35-45 hours/week (USA). Its’ as much time, as invested in any JOB
  • 243. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL MENTAL DIMENSION Habit –3 is required to control it. Like body, TV is good servant and poor master Extremely important to Train mind, to stand apart and examine its own program. That’s the definition of liberal education- the ability to examine the program of life against larger questions and purposes and other paradigms
  • 244. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL MENTAL DIMENSION That’s why its ‘ so valuable to read broadly and to expose yourself to great minds Read good literature, you can get into the best minds- start with a book every month then two and finally a book per week “ A person who doesn’t read is no better to a person who can’t read.”
  • 245. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL MENTAL DIMENSION Writing - powerful way to sharpen the saw- helps think clearly, Writhing on good deeper thoughts not about Shallow superficial events Its’ said,” Wars are won in General’s tents” Sharpening the saw in physical, mental and spiritual lvl is called “daily private victory” Spend one hour a day for rest of your life daily.
  • 246. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL DIMENSION While spiritual, mental, physical renewal requires Habits 1,2,and 3 The social life is related to others. This dimension doesn’t require time it require exercise (mind setting) when we meet people on daily basis
  • 247. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL DIMENSION When you see old lady I see young lady- Using Habit –4, I value this difference, using Habit-V, listen you empathically and then comm my point of view Based on commitment to search or 3rd alternative we move to Habit –6. But to practice Habit-4, 5 and 6 you got to have personal worth and that comes from life of integrity
  • 248. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL DIMENSION There is also security in knowing win/win does exist - but to achieve the required courage and inner security comes from Habit –1, 2 and3 Service to others adds to our security – More so the anonymous service when influence no recognition dominates
  • 249. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL DIMENSION “I want to be thoroughly used up when die” G GERNAARD SHAW. SEREVICE IS THE RENT WE PAY FOR PRIVILAEGE OF LIVING ON THIS EARTH NELON TANNER
  • 250. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SCRIPTING OTHERS When we reflect to others their pro-activity their importance, we help them as principle centered, value based, independent worthwhile individual And “abundance Mentality” tells us nothing diminishes by sharing When somebody doesn’t believe in himself and you believe in him you script him
  • 251. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SCRIPTING OTHERS We can become (+ve) scripter, story of a class in England It was inaccurately programmed, labeling of bright kids” dumb” and dumb kids as ‘bright” – 5 1/2 months latter……? “ Treat a person as he is, he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can and he should be and he will become as he can be and should be.” GOETHE
  • 252. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL BALANCE IN RENEWAL To neglect one out of four dimensions effects others. Any dimension neglected will create (-ve) force field resistance that pushes against effective growth In organizing physical dimension is expressed in economical terms
  • 253. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL BALANCE IN RENEWAL Mental/ psy in recognition, development, use of talent Social/Emotional dimension human relationship, with how people are treated Spiritual- gives meaning through purpose and contribution Process of continual improvement is hallmark of total Quality Movement and key to Japan’s ascendancy
  • 254. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SYNERGY IN RENEWAL Renewal in any dimension increases your ability to live at least one of seven habits. More proactive (habit –1) you are: - • More effective you can exercise personal ldrshp (habit-2) and mgt (habit-3) • More effectively managed life (habit –3) more Quadrant –II renewing activities you can do (habit-7)
  • 255. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SYNERGY IN RENEWAL • More you seek first to understand (habit –5) more you can go for win/win relationship (habit 4 and 6) • Each daily private victory makes a deposit in your personal intrinsic security account • Rich private life with respect to spiritual – tremendous deposit in personal security account
  • 256. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL SYNERGY IN RENEWAL • Mental dimension contribution to mgt (Habit-3) • Your economy doesn’t lie in job it lies in – Power to produce, think learn, create, adapt • That’s’ true financial independence. • It’s not wealth its’ power to produce wealth. Its’ intrinsic
  • 257. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL Renewal – empowers to move on an up ward spiral of growth and change, of continuous improvement. To make meaningful and consistent progress along the spiral needs- “conscious”. It senses our congruence or disparity with correct principles and lifts us towards them
  • 258. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL Just as education of mind is important to students and scholars- conscious is vital to truly proactive people Training and educating conscious requires greater discipline, concentrated, honest living in harmony with little inner voice
  • 259. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL Just as junk food can destroy athletes, things that are obscene, crude or pornographic can breed an inner darkness that numbs higher sensitivities and substantial social conscious of “ will I be found out” for “ what is right or wrong”
  • 260. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL Once we recognize important of values, principles, purposes we must LIVE by them–or the vacuum will be filled, and we will lose our self-awareness and become like groveling animals that live primarily for survival and propagation
  • 261. HABIT- 7 RENEWAL UPWARD SPIRAL And there is no short cut to them - law of Harvest governs. We must indulgence by educating and obeying our conscious. Moving along upward spiral requires us to learn, cmt and do increase at higher planes. We deceive ourselves if we think that any one of these is sufficient.
  • 262. INSIDE OUT AGAIN I share my own story. When I read paragraph, “Gap between stimulus and response” struck me. I started to stand in gap between stimulus and response and started to observe myself It was almost like knowing it for the 1st time. Sandra and myself began an exciting adventure into our interior worlds- a world that fascinated us both
  • 263. INSIDE OUT AGAIN Initially we were supportive and helpful encouraging each other through empathic listening – It was difficult, painful some times uglier- embarrassing – it made us extremely open and vulnerable. We gradually evolved two ground rules – though unspoken. 1st was no probing – only to empathize. 2nd was, when it was too much hurting- we would call it a day
  • 264. INSIDE OUT AGAIN One hang up was Sandra’s obsession with “Frigidiare” appliances- She would go out of way- for Frigidiare” It always made me sick.. Then came the story.. Time of recession her father worked for “Frigidiare” and when he returned home in the evening he would share with Sandra the hard job. The only hope her father had that “Frigidiare” supports his invention program
  • 265. INSIDE OUT AGAIN I remember we both became tearful that day.. We found, key to be in love is to talk, even when I travel I keep in touch. Its’ like touching home base, which accesses all the happiness, security and value it represents.
  • 266. INTERGENERATIONAL LIVING Using gap between stimulus and response empowers to examine our program, Rescripting and creating important Quadrant-II activities Doing it we both were able to see at deeper level The scripts we were given (I spoke earlier) included beautiful, +ve scripts passed down to us and we never valued them- blindly taken it for granted
  • 267. INTERGENERATIONAL LIVING There is transcendent power in a strong intergenerational family An effective independent family of children, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles cousin can be a powerful force in helping people have a sense of what they are where they came from and what they stand for These relationships reflect a powerful picture and help script/program positively
  • 268. INTERGENERATIONAL LIVING Similarly they act a surrogate mother/father They all become +ve social mirror “There re only two lasting bequests we can give our children The roots and The wings”
  • 269. INTERGENERATIONAL LIVING Similarly they act a surrogate mother/father They all become +ve social mirror “There re only two lasting bequests we can give our children The roots and The wings”
  • 270. BECOMING TRANSITIONAL PERSON To rise above –ve scripting. Terry Warner calls a “Transition” person. IF you were abused as child that doesn’t mean you will have to abuse your children- Because you are proactive, you can rewrite the script. Forgive your parents- and if they are alive build +ve relationship with them through “First seek to understand” You are a transitional person – a link between past and future
  • 271. BECOMING TRANSITIONAL PERSON One powerful Transitional Person “ Anwar Saadat”…….Achieving unity – oneness – with ourselves, with our loved ones with our friends and working associated and its’ fruit of Seven Habits If we start with daily Private victory - result will surely come. “That we persist in doing becomes easier not that nature of the task has changed , but our ability to do has changed”. EMERSON
  • 272. PERSONAL NOTE I believe that there are parts to human nature that can’t be reached by either legalisations or education, but require the power of GOD deal with I believe that as human beings , we can’t perfect ourselves. To the degree to which we align ourselves with correct principles, divine endowments will be released within our nature in enabling us to fulfill the measures of our creation
  • 273. PERSONAL NOTE “We mustn’t cease from exploration and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we BEGAN and to know the place for the first time” T.S. ELLIOT