My story

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MY STORY: HEART, CANCER, DEPRESSION, STROKE, PACEMAKER, IAT and COAGULATION. OVERCAME! AND YOU?

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My story

  1. 1. MY STORY: HEART (twice), CANCER, DEPRESSION, STROKE (twice) and PACEMAKER. All TRACKS overcome through the Tijuca Forest.
  2. 2. Copyright © 2015 - Publisher Rodrigo.Vieira.Intternet Productions All Rights Reserved to Mr. Rodrigo de Oliveira Vieira. No part of this publication may be reproduced or linked in any form, whether physical or electronic, without the knowledge and express authorization of its author. All error PORTUGUESE, Concordances and other. They may be sent to my private email. Thank you very much for your help. Unfortunately my Portuguese was lost between stroke. But still alive the Portuguese coming from my heart, IMMENSE, GIANT and true. Site: http://rodrigoovieira.blogspot.com.br Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/rodrigo.vieira.353803 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/autorsociedadeanonima E-mail: rodrigoovieira@yahoo.com.br YouTube: Rodrigo Vieira (heart, cancer, stroke and Pacemaker) Instagram: https://instagram.com/rodrigoovieira0001
  3. 3. Dedicated "I dedicate my family who loves me too, my friends who are very few, but live in my heart and my psychologist who solved a puzzle in my sleeping neurons. I take this opportunity to "green" the Tijuca Forest even more, for without it there would be the dream book. Amen! Love! Peace! Happiness! "
  4. 4. Index Part 1 | Preface Part 2 | First heart operation Part 3 | Cancer My Wife Part 4 | Depression and work Part 5 | First stroke Part 6 | According stroke and heart operation Part 7 | Pacemaker Part 8 | Tijuca Forest Part 8 | Our lives Part 9 | Photos Part 10 | Letters and Poem
  5. 5. Foreword Unfortunately my Portuguese is very poor, compared to the great writers there are. Summer grammar errors, verbal agreements, points which should not exist and other serious things, I as a writer, should not commit. But the vast majority of people who will see my story take shape, will opt for writing a blessed and capable of all life. So I ask million excuses why I write now with the heart, and it is the pure and true feelings take extraordinary ways. I had a lifetime to do what I wanted to be an IT programmer or a large advertising or even a journalist. But life has given me another alternative, tell a "living" part of my magnificent history of struggle, defiance and desire. But this fight, challenge and will is so big and so beautiful to see and believe, that makes faith is my main event. A life that many say, that was my strength and my ability to overcome challenges. I do not think it was healing all. It was salvation and my healing poorly. Now I want to take this faith for you. I had several problems, but all were overcome. But beginning to unravel my big and bold evils, all had their key role. All were and are factors of extraordinary growth. Let's start to title my big problems, so it's easier you understand and realize how serious was certain moments of my life. Operated heart, my wife had cancer and died, my grandmother died the day of my wife's cancer discovery, I went into depression, had two strokes'S (Stroke) and operated the heart a second time and put a marker step. Anyway, I think this is already good. Do not you think? Life is so amazing! It was hard! But I won! I have problems? None. Absolutely, I am a very normal guy. Do it! Conquer! Run ahead! That's what I always do and that's what keeps me alive constantly. Sorry errors of PORTUGUESE again as it is complicated for me to form a perfect word. Anyway, it's heart and much love to write to you. "Writing is a need me." Clarice Lispector I would not know what I would do if did not write. It is a giant complex of pure and true words, I can not not leave them to declare the love I feel for them. Are noun, adjectives, adverbs and other complex grammars, I do not know more, but make me strength to write without knowing what goes on in the head but in the heart. The heart is so huge in terms of great and complex words in the virtues of the soul meant. I am a lucky, a project to be sensitive human words that make no sense, but in the end do. This is crazy so great that I myself can not understand how I write without knowing how to write. I strongly believe that the heart is the most natural and true way to write what I think and desire. I am so full of attitude, full of conscience and full of courage. Why is the heart that speaks louder than anything.
  6. 6. First heart operation My name is Rodrigo Vieira, I'm 35 years old and work in a multinational in Rio de Janeiro. I have a life story with some overruns and achievements. It took nearly 10 years of struggle and overcoming regarding health and death. It was a normal morning work. Always arrived early to meet targets and deliver my work material always on time. It was very annoying with it because it was a virtue sign, which always fulfill your goals. It was 6 am when my phone rang. Me and my girlfriend Ana Paula, always work together and it was a good thing because we always had an important role within the company. She told me she was with very low pressure, normal thing for her, for he had a hypotensive pressure (below normal pressure). I found it very strange her voice on the phone, but listened to what she had to say. His voice was trembling and felt a sharp pain in the heart. One of two things, she was enfartando was a
  7. 7. tension or crisis in metro Rio de Janeiro. Unfortunately, here in Rio de Janeiro, from the line two subway was an almost daily crisis. He said he was going to the subway Carioca, who would catch and take her to the medical center of the great company that worked. As usual, it was customary to drop everything I was doing to help my girlfriend. You will always remember that dated, got engaged and married, so do not judge me if at some point, err conjugations relationship. It was very close to the working underground, and in five minutes there I was standing in the crowd trying to see Ana Paula. When I saw astonished and colorless, I was scared. I pushed everyone who was around me and held her by the arms. I asked what she was feeling and she always told me the same thing, a strong pain in my heart. I follow even the most secure building, where we would have a preview of what was going on. I was walking by foot, and always wondering what she was feeling, unfortunately people get frustrated and that's too bad. We got to the building, I put the badge of her and asked for help for the first guard I saw. Unfortunately there was no time, she was fainting. It's so weird you see a person on your side, a loved one, losing strength and faint. Promptly everyone around me were to help me and went quickly, she passed out, for the medical sector. She left the doctor's care and went to the waiting room crying. I did not know what to do and not what to feel. I called my mother and I called my mother. All were desperate and waiting for a position. Some time later, the doctor came to me and asked me what was going on, the drugs she took and other relevant things. And he had noticed, there was nothing else. However, it was necessary to go to a doctor for a general check up. So we went a cardiologist on the same day. It what had happened and started doing the tests to determine what was happening. My girlfriend had a habit of wanting me to do some tests to see if it was okay with me. I totally unnecessary, but it was her life that was at risk. So I did the exams as well. We were satisfied to a Botafogo clinic for the two-dimensional echocardiography with Doppler color for her and for me. Anyway, do what? We set off for exams. We did the tests of my wife and her problem was a pure momentary stress. When did my exam, the doctor was an hour looking my heart and asked me waited. After an outgoing call to my cardiologist, she told me that my exams were serious, in a state of advanced severity and probably I should operate as quickly as possible. My ground began to fall apart at that very moment the doctor said it was a normal operation and stones rolled down the cliff with me. It was a very painful back to the City Centre. It was something he did not expect so little thought I should go through all that. Unfortunately I did not like the doctor who attended me and others who did not please me. I remember I went to the health plan and
  8. 8. saw an unfamiliar name, but called and went to him. It was the Doctor Jazbik team. One of the best surgeons of Rio de Janeiro. I remember I was on the appointed day with my mom, find Dr. Carlos Jazbik, the person who would operate me. It was totally quiet and friendly. I was handing in his hands my life for him. Fortunately was a congenital aortic insufficiency, instead of being tricuspid valve was bicuspid. We decided to operate as fast as possible and with the inclusion of a mechanical valve. Surgery dated, marked exams and I was ready to go change my small valve. I've always loved the internet, because I thought of everything and always more. Of course, bad things and good, but always filtering. I started looking for cases of serious failure in patients with congenital aortic valve, similar operations and all you can find in the digital world. I did biochemistry area of the college where he was studying, then did not care to see dead people because'd seen in anatomical UERJ. I was wondering what I would go and how was surgery. After great difficulty, I found an operation performed in full, with cuts, chest bones, cardiopulmonary machine for blood and technical details I needed to know and master. I know it was not a good thing, but I needed to know by academic curiosity and life. Of my life! I remember like it was today, did not sleep and did not have to. It was a lost night and had to think about how it was my future hospital facility, medical or whatever. Had insomnia since childhood, then think to know, it was better than not knowing, and wander around. The day was marked, was the March 12, 2004, at 7 am. I remember it was Luiz (Manoel) a very great friend of my family who took me to the hospital in Barra da Tijuca. Just do not ask me the name of the hospital, because I do not remember and I intend to forget it forever. My girlfriend Ana Paula was already in the hospital and together with a good friend of mine named Amanda. I know it now is 24 years or more. Are small friendships that grow over time, in joys and sorrows. I was in the hospital, my mother, my father and my dear grandmother Gina wistful. But forward you will know more of it, leave an hour I keep alive the memory of their presence. All very tearful at the hospital, but had to keep me going strong for everyone. It was my life and would not give up her ever. I said goodbye and went to the operating room. Laughs a lot, I talked with wonderful people, made my hair removal (shaving) with 8 different people and the time had come, went to the operation. Everything went very well, because he was alive. Unfortunately we had some ups and downs in relation to procedures, because I had an infection in points, went into depression and made the worst test that a person could do, transesophageal echo, without anesthesia and in the face and courage. But with great results, because there was the risk of bacterial endocarditis. After 30 days in the hospital, I went home.
  9. 9. There were 4 months of much struggle, strong and agoniantes pain. But they soon became in a brief reminder of what I had been through. Life must always be live to the fullest. "If you stay too long staring into the abyss, the abyss will look for you." Nietzshe I was much downtime looking at a bottomless pit with no way out, aimlessly with nothing. But I reergui and climbed through the rocks and crevices. Now I'm on top again, stirring up my strength to climb higher than we ever would rise. I'm looking at the staircase that goes to heaven. A sky full of great opportunities and obstacles, but will overcome all. Do you know why? For my heart is huge in the eyes of the people, and growing by the minute and second. That to me is a win to try and achieve. The victory you have got out of depression to happiness. Cancer My Wife It was in late 2006, in 09/12/2006. It was a flower and a couple of groomsmen wedding. Simple, however, objective and made with love. We had the idea of making a wedding to history but a wedding done right in God's eyes. Fortunately our home was totally complete, at least the room was the only thing missing, but the details were already purchased and waiting for the arrival. It was a very beautiful wedding, made by a deacon. At the end of marriage we received a Bible. At the end of five years, it rests the hopes full of love, a couple posthumously ended by a cruel and cold disease. Not afraid to speak the word cancer. I always see people hitting the mouth, staring eye tail or not wanting to talk about it. It is a disabling disease like any other disease such as a heart attack or a stroke or stroke (cerebrovascular accident or Stroke). So I do not mete out effort to always say the right words and necessary for each disease. Whenever we gathered friends to meetings indoors. We always had food, games, much chat, drink and very sweet. It was a much watered party binge and a tidal wave of medications to the stomach. In one of these parties, my wife went very badly and went
  10. 10. to a Italian Hospital, to treat motion sickness and malaise. The doctor had asked her to attend to a gastroenterologist to check rectal bleeding and treatments to treat them. In a few days we were taking the exam, where my mother was there to help if needed. I knew it was a tumor but did not know whether it was benign or malignant. Something told me that, as a powerful voice guide me into a dark room. We entered, we talked to the doctor and soon began a review made by the patient's rectum, a completely evasive examination. Some time later, still sleepy, he called me into his office and told me it was a tumor and the disease would determine the degree of it. Unfortunately he thought it was a malignant tumor. At the end of consultation, groggy with drugs, he told what he had seen and asked to be immediately to a doctor who can not remember the name and not make it a point to remember. Because I believe that he must have done something very wrong during treatment the removal of tumors. Anyway, it was an unethical man as a person and professional. We await the exams be ready when I received the news that my grandmother was very ill because he had had a third hemorrhagic stroke (cerebrovascular accident). A few days later, when the examination of the results was ready, and she really was not sure it was a malignant cancer in the intestine. Just then, my grandmother had died in São Paulo, with some close relatives, including my father and mother present. Doing what: mourn the death of my beloved grandmother in São Paulo or to force my wife living in Rio de Janeiro. I had no choice to be made, except to give strength to the treatment of Ana Paula. My grandmother had gone to God and knew it was a beautiful and wonderful place. Our families always hit it as far as possible. There we talked frequently, but were always cordial and polite with both parties. On behalf of my mother, she spared no effort to help in whatever way necessary, for mother of the Ana Paula thing was reciprocal, but with caveats my person. Mother is a mother anywhere in the world and we can not have the right to question certain aspects. But I would not like to comment on these aspects in my book. I remember once, during my heart surgery, I had said I would be at her side when she needed. Unfortunately the time it was cancer. She never leaves her side and always stayed until the last breath of his life. I do not remember the date of the operation, but I believe it was very close to discovery. She worked at a well-renowned Hospital in Rio de Janeiro and everything went perfectly well. Only my wife was not well surgically because no standard surgery and cause so many unbearable pain. The first surgery she was hospitalized for 5 days. But she came home with severe pain and without any plausible conclusion to this kind of conduct. We went back to the hospital and she was hospitalized for over 7 days. Examinations were made and she still
  11. 11. complained of pain surgery. Doctors always said that this was a normal thing, the more pain she felt were not normal. When people do any surgical procedure they improve over time, but it just got worse. Again she went home and a few days later we went back to the hospital. It was not normal for me to know that my wife felt pain and no one did anything to help her. I already had called her doctors and told the absurd and reckless way they were treating her, and there would be a negative response, wanted a solution. She thousands of tests and found that there was a liver metastasis. I was overwhelmed with how it happened. I do not know if it was a medical error, hospital or anything that was. I felt powerless and unable at that time. A unique chance to correct the mistake made was that the doctor told the news to her, it was done, but not understood by her. I do not know if it was the pain, the drugs or the illusion of being cured. A few days later, on the day of her chemotherapy, the doctor was plausible and told of liver metastasis. A hard shock to a heart so hopeful. We scheduled surgery for catheter and started the chemotherapy as soon as possible. The first chemotherapy you never forget, right? It was something terrible for her and for me. With a few hours of infusion, I saw his body deteriorating, joint pain, headache, nausea and other terrible things. It was an unspeakable suffering, but she would with the infusion pump to the house and after three days to withdraw infusion. A suffering that is so fond of the person and love heart. A few months passed and the tumors had begun to decline, but not quite. Her liver was divided into the five large tumors and all impossible to be removed in surgery. More tests were made and a complete surgery, they removed what they could from her liver. I had already talked to the doctor about the possibility of his death, and he always confirmed me the same thing. Possibility almost nil. This made me happy, and at the same time sad and devastated to see a beautiful woman, perfect and good heart, fade through a cancer that correi the soul, illusion and dream. Our life was always full, even taking the health problems. Whenever we left and went to bars at the home of friends and meetings in our humble residence. It was always a spree, with games, food and booze. Unfortunately my wife could not drink, she also was not much of a drinker, and even with all this was a spree such as laughed and had fun in with the bullshit that everyone was talking about. She sometimes retreated to the bedroom, with severe pain, but was part of the treatment. It was the fight that we had to hang. Over the years, the fight always getting worse, we find some other tumors, always doing exams and treating as the disease progressed. Unfortunately she was going slowly, very slowly and was certain possibility of death.
  12. 12. We had a funny episode during chemotherapy treatment. She thought she was pregnant. My heart was the moon and returned within thunder. Like having a child in the state she was in. But everything was debunked with a pregnancy test. The last surgery was the implementation of an IUD. She had fibroids and needed to be treated as soon as possible. Minor surgery was done and everything went very well. But as the days passed, she began to get worse and worse knew it was an inevitable thing. He was the doctor who implanted the IUD and the doctor thought it was time to go to the hospital, she was not having weak to walk. I knew and she knew, somehow, that was the last time our lives were going to have a happy ending. Remember there was not spoken of my mother. But she was an exceptional person at the end of his life. She was lucid and fully able to help me take care of her until the end of its existence. Always listened to the doctors that the life of my wife, who was fading and could not tell it to her. It was a death sentence that only I should know, she never even though she knew he was going to another place. Two days before his death, I talked to the doctor in the morning, about the possibility to stay the last night with her, beside her and remembering the beautiful and wonderful things we have achieved together. His answer was always no. But that afternoon he had released me to sleep with her. It made me so happy and sad at the same time, it was our farewell! I felt ungrounded! So devastated! At once I told her I would go home to get some clothes and would soon return to the hospital, but that would be the only time I find her lucid and able to spell a word. That shook me in such a severe way, but kept me strong for the night I would have with it. I prayed a lot, all the saints and archangels for the way it was in peace and without suffering. The next day, I was so sad and totally unhappy, that a priest passed my bed and saw me crying. He rocked me and asked if I could do an extreme unction, and I said yes. My brother and sister were present. She was at peace and the doctor had already given a medicine to ease her tension. In the afternoon it's gone forever. "There are medicines for all kinds of diseases, but if these drugs are not taken in good hands, wanting love, is not cured the most terrible diseases:. The condition of not feeling loved" Mother Teresa of Calcutta Words beautiful and perfect a perfect and kind woman. There is no other explanation for so true facts and noble way. People want to be cured of disease, but the cure is not on the pill you take, but the kind soul who handles. I was very careful in the face of everything I gave to my wife. Medicines on time, food at the right time, lay down beside you in times of pain and quietly prayed for his healing. I was a man of faith? Do not know! I have no idea! I had the perfect woman beside me, saying I needed or not. I remember that on the night before his death, she slept in peace and with the heart slightly facing the sky. I held a Bible and read beautiful things and prayers that she
  13. 13. would never listen with your ears, but with an open heart for the love we felt for each other. I read a quote that was said during our marriage and it made me strong for all. It was: "Whoever hears these teachings and live in accordance with them is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain fell, the floods came, and the wind blew hard against that house. But it did not fall because it was built on rock. ". Anyway, I do not have more words and no strength to write. Only those who are loved, you know what it is to be ... Depression and Work Depression is a very bad thing in the life of anyone. I did not know what was the depression and the effects it provides our body. I felt, after her death, a void and nothing could fill the gap she made me. Wake up thinking about her, did things thinking of her and slept thinking of her. It was a very difficult time, I had to use a psychiatrist to try to somehow solve this lack she made me. After all, I still had to digest some things for me was not worth anything, but it was something that needed to be done. No longer wanted the apartment, things that reminded her, the car and all that could be applicant to weeping and sorrow. Everything was passed to my mother in law and father in law, but with their proper legal powers under the law. I returned to work and began to fight and rebuild head back to the life that I still had. I remember I started to go to college, worked too hard, always had some sites that updated and was opening a small business. At 24 hours it was not enough for me. I remember I arrived at work and always had two connected computers, the company and mine. My college has always priority because he loved what he did, advertising, and always got good grades. The sites always yielded me money and it was something that was in my blood, I could not help but do. The company was almost closed, only needed a signature. Then came my first stroke (Cerebral Valvular accident). "If you feel bored when alone it is because it is in bad company." Jean-Paul Sartre I feel alone: as a flower that dies falling out of a tree, lonely, empty and hopeless. But she had hope when he was born, grew, bloomed, withered and fell in front of me. I am full of friends, but friends are friends. In life we are always only for the life that goes on, why we are born, we grow, mature, grow old and die. This is all a cycle to an end and
  14. 14. purpose. We have to mature our ideas, and expose to the world our ideology and belief for humanity. I'm strong, too! Even if alone or not, fighting for life or not, I'm strong because God made me this way and that's how I have to fight, fight and fight for a life that believe and have faith that will come true. My First Stroke My first stroke, was difficult to write about something you really do not know or do not understand at first. But I remember much and also remember people judging me as unfit for life. It hurts so much, because I am not able and never will be. My memory lapse is very limited when trying to describe how it happened. But I swear I will try to write as much as possible of the things that happened. I remember this day I went to the city center to sign my contract with my friend Rafael. I was excited and could not wait to start putting forward the project of my life. I remember it was an online internet and selling design, but just remember that. I worked at the Maracana, one of the branches. As it was late, I took a taxi and went to the City Centre to meet him and his accountant wife. How it was the way I went down to the church Our Lady of Childbirth, to pray for my wife and grandmother, a very typical habit in my life. I went to the chapel of the church and bought two candles and went to the scene to light them. It was a beautiful moment, where I cried, I prayed and asked that they estivem in a much better place than I am. I always thought so and always think. Life is short, so we must always do the things that make us happy. After leaving the church, a dark cloud has blocked all my thoughts. Who I was? Where I was? Silly questions, but did not know at all, but nothing. I remember certain things, like my friend for example, but did not remember his name. I found him in front of the church, he asked me if it was okay, and I said yes. But rhetorical question because I do not know if it was good or bad what was happening to me. I followed him as followed an ant in the middle of a forest. We went to the notary to sign the papers to conclude the business in question. I remember they gave me papers to be signed, but did not remember my name, my address, age who had at last I could not remember anything. My friend was a little scared me and he did not know what was happening because it could be a momentary evil. He took my wallet to see your home address because he knew I had a mechanical valve in the heart and had all the data
  15. 15. concerning the same and saw that he had enough money to take a taxi. He already had called my parents and they already waiting for me at the door. When I arrived I did not say anything. I lay down and slept for one hour. I had headache problems? No. I had motor problems? No. I had nothing to accuse such a serious problem. Unfortunately only knew sleep, watch TV and sleep again. My parents were worried about me and went to a hospital, where he did not reveal anything more about what happened to me. Unfortunately a hospital that did not have an MRI was not a decent place to trust. They gave me four days of medical certificate and could return to work normally. I slept in those four days uninterruptedly, watching television sporadically. My brother had arrived in Brasilia and came to see me and know what was going on. At once he had realized my crooked mouth and did not say anything with anything, immediately went to a hospital, it was a typical stroke table (Stroke). Until now it was a stroke (cerebrovascular accident), but did not know if it was ischemic or hemorrhagic. But knew it was a serious and difficult problem acceptance by the general public. Unfortunately people dictate the rules, as something natural, as a crippled person, with part of the body paralyzed and no future ahead. I found myself so, that way, no future and no prospects. I did several tests and passed several cardiologists to neurologists, and the diagnosis was a stroke Ischemic due to an aortic valve clotting which was below 1 INR coagulation (blood factor). My INR, should be between 2.5 and 3.5 coagulation. Always managed to blood tests, but of fate, was totally out of control. I was hospitalized for 15 days between CTI and fourth, and was soon released from hospital. It was a few months a lot of introspection. I did not know to talk, read, write and talk. I thought that was the end of my life. I thought I could not be what I was and so little I wanted to be in the distant future. I remember when I got home, my mother had become my father, my father had become my mother, my dog was named chair and my brother and my sister were strangers. Each day that passed in my dark room and under the duvet, it was a moment that meant nothing to me, because he had a television to meet my will. My money was in my father's hand, but he was always clear and honest, left everything on the desk, as notes, bills etc. But that did not interest me anymore. My mood was bad, my memory was empty and my thoughts were completely torn apart, the disease that had affected me. I remember my medicines were given in my hand, but I did not know what was taking. Life becomes so empty when times as serious and unresolved problem.
  16. 16. I started going to doctors as speech therapists, physiotherapists and psychologists. They were boring moments for me, because I did not want to do any of that. I just wanted to watch television and lie under my duvet. But I do not know why, I think something was pulling me into the street and made me go at will, as if something made me see that it all had a purpose, a plus or my life back. Extremely difficult and hard moments, where the lack of interest was fully justified. But the voice always said I was on track and could not let go never do these treatments boring, but necessary. I made a few months treatment for physiotherapy, which corrected my left cheek. My speech therapist who dropped by my lack of interest. And my psychologist Dra. Angela Israel, which was the great savior of my treatment, because without it I would not exist. I am so grateful for all she did for me. She knew me before the disease then, and she assured me that I would ever be 100% healed. But for that were difficult months, treatments and boring conversations. Once, during the treatment of stroke, my brother had called me to go to São Paulo for a change of scenery. It was an incredible moment, because I needed it to try to make my life make sense somehow. Were incredible moments because we knew museums, shopping malls, restaurants and we were the first premiere of The Addams Family. It was the first time I went to São Paulo, but it was a liberation that I needed to keep my active life again. Where did the urge to want to see the world. And then I called my friend Amanda to know the Argentina. She had known the country, but the will to want to know a little more of the world, was a new thing for me. I know it to 24 years or more, one dearest friend and a very strong temperament. So much so that we get along so well. So we bought the ticket, hotel, tours and travel. It was a beautiful and wonderful trip. I'll never forget how good was this time outside Brazil: no parents, no brother, no doctors and no nothing that could keep me prisoner before the fight I had in Brazil. Four days were wonderful! But I wanted more ... a trip mine alone and I did. He had already talked to my psychologist about it and she agreed that I had the need to explore the world, I felt the need to want to seize this moment. I bought a ticket to São Paulo and not regret anything because it was a trip that made me grow and mature. My parents had a heart attack, but could not do anything, it was my life that was being treated and evaluated for myself. It was a wonderful trip and that freed me of corretes a disease for me, no more. Soon after, travel to Curitiba, Santa Catarina, inside the Rio de Janeiro and all made me grow exponentially and rewarding way. Always I talked to my psychologist about Rodrigo who was inside me, before and after the stroke. The question was simple and straightforward: Do you identify with Rodrigo before or after stroke? Always I said I
  17. 17. like Rodrigo I am now: a giant heart before the world. Always agreement and make the following question: I am a happy or sad face on the world? The answer is happy for life. "We can do no great things - only small things with great love" Mother Teresa of Calcutta It's so pure and true words of a noble-hearted woman like Mother Teresa. I wanted to 0.0001% of wisdom that divine woman possessed. But, I have the gift and the power she had and has in the hearts of people. Do small things, but with love. That's the honest truth and sincerity that a woman said to me. Always craved great things and tortuous before I could perform them. But there came a woman: simple, uncomplicated words and a simple way, which gave me a great life lesson. The words are great inspirations to life. Are small projects, made with love, which changed the lives of so many people who need and can leave the darkness of a hole full of hatred and anguish. I got over 4 times the dark holes that life has imposed me, full of negative words and void wills. But I believe a word that brings a lot of hope in life: faith. If I had faith I have today for all who live and believe, I'd still be in one of four dark holes and without hope.
  18. 18. My second stroke and heart operation I remember like it was today, it was on January 19, 2013, the day of my wife's birthday. Was it a sign? I think so. My life changed just when the first symptoms of the second stroke (cerebrovascular accident). It was a mixture of panic and at the same time, I knew what I should do. It was a repetitive and regular bid, like I was ready for that moment. I felt the pain in his left arm, but discarded the possibilities that could be a heart attack or a stroke (cerebrovascular accident). I went to the Rio D'or. It was the home of a good friend of mine called Anderson, who took me promptly to Rios D'or. Fortunately he did not leave my side in no time even when doctors were present. I thank too the big heart help in such a difficult time. I entered the Rios D'or, and said to the attendant who was having a heart attack. Unfortunately, a person who had a heart operation and Ischemic Stroke, can not go a minute without service code red. I was quickly led to an electrocardiogram and then to a doctor who once me a battery and questions. The questions were simple, but the answers were complicated for my head at that moment. I felt a sharp pain in his left arm, but she had spent during the coming to the hospital. The memory was a little confused, did not remember the name of the drugs, did not remember events that occurred during my coming to the hospital, but I knew something was wrong and was sure it would be the second stroke. I was promptly taken to a bed, in front of the medical team that watched me intently. I find it amusing stay in a bed readily turned to doctors who are always evaluating me. Of course! They do not want me to have a heart attack or something, but I find it very funny. It should be a standard hospital or something. Did X-ray, blood tests, echo cardiogram and finally an MRI skull. The result came out and I was absolutely sure that my sources were safe, I had a second Ischemic Stroke. As you have opened a vacancy for the ICU (Intensive Care Unit), I called my parents and told them. Well, I need not tell the drama of my mother to know he was in the hospital. I told my dad that could come tomorrow, was ready to go up and that should solve the payment of my bills with the INSS. Anyway, it was totally normal, full and absolute everything he did and ready to fight again. The next day I met the doctor in charge cardiological my case, talked and decided to conduct a survey boring, but necessary, transesophageal echo. Well, for those who do not know this examination is done through the throat to see the heart more inside, like an endoscopy. In my case, it was really necessary to perform a second operation because the blood clot was much worse and there was a risk of leaving the heart and going to the brain. Anyway, God was not a wonderful person to me? I had the desire to change the mechanical heart valve, a tissue valve. We discussed it among doctors and I
  19. 19. and tenths switch to organic valve. It operate again to 20 years, and will be one million times faster is practical. I guarantee! On the day of surgery, everything was done in the most perfect possible order. It was a quiet and perfect surgery. I realized that much had changed in the two surgeries, and there were things for the better. Points, surgery time, food etc. In two weeks I was home with my regular pain for 3 months of operation, finally do what. But I was alive! "Intense Love is not assessed, only gives" Mother Teresa of Calcutta People need both believe in love, because it would save the world. I do my part in order to express myself and tell the truth that is in my heart. It is difficult, very difficult, but nothing matters if what we say is pure and sincere heart. I do not want legions around me, like a cult. I want to captivate people by the look, the expressions, the feeling of the words and say that they can be happy. Everyone in this world can be happy. Just enough to want! Then love, that's it ... I give myself completely. It makes me so great a good.
  20. 20. Pacemaker Whenever I walk through the forest of Tijuca, walked 10, 18 or 24 km a day in Paineiras or Sumaré, walk trails by Parrot peaks and Tijuca and then do gym with weight training, spinning, abdominal and stretching. Every day the same routine and some time off to go to museums, cinemas or nothing to do, watching TV is good too. But always connected to everything and everyone, like Instagram, Facebook and e- mails. Despite help my fitness, I have to keep my projects I do with love, always at the forefront of my life. In my life, I always had misgivings, and always correct. One day and one night, I felt a strong pain very strong head. I thought it was a pain to livestock, medicine and I passed. But the next day I felt bad and no mood for anything. In the afternoon, after the bath, I felt my face a little crooked. Fortunately I knew it was not very good. It would be a third stroke? Quickly went to the Quinta D'or see what was happening. As usual, I gave all previous detailing and historical problems that had already had. As always, I entered an electrocardiogram and two doctors came to check out that I was checking me. The beginning was a third stroke, but they were astonished with the beating of my heart. Beats? Heart? What do you mean? They explained that the beating of my heart should beat up 60 beats per minute, but my rate were 30 beats per minute and falling. Would make exams as soon as possible of heart, including those related to you celebrate and I was giving input to the ICU (Intensive Care Unit Coronary). Life fold each piece in us! Silly things become bad things and vice versa. How would Fernando Pessoa, we have to have giant heart for the world. Coco Chanel said that we have to head to think about how to perform. Cora Coralina, beautiful poet, said that we must take heart and emotion in the simple things of life. I think so! I'm like this! I will always be so! So to think negative things I can think of positive things. All examinations were terrible, but the reality of the things that came to me were such a profound energy, which could not say I would not go out of that hospital alive. I would come out of there alive and wanting my Tijuca forest again, with the green around me and my muddy feet. My diagnosis was that of a CHB (Lock Atrio Ventricular Total). A beautiful name for those who want to say that the heart is breaking. But it was true, it could stop at any time. So the inclusion of the pacemaker. Unfortunately many hospitals, doctors and the like get out of it. But this was the way to keep me alive. It was the icing on my cake was missing!
  21. 21. Each doctor who passed and watched the monitors, were shocked by the vitality and age I was and kept at each moment over my bed. I always distributed smiles, always said good morning, good afternoon, good evening, thank you, nothing and other things that Mom and Dad taught me. I was not a miracle or a warrior or a hero or anything like that. I was there to keep my life except what might happen. But my plans were not death but life. A medical arrhythmologist cardiologist came to my bed and talked to me about the pacemaker, and brought greater light on their symptoms and benefits. My only fear was not able to exercise and walk my 15 to 24 km per day. But nowadays, many athletes do this and participate in marathons. Then, the operation was confirmed. I had the surgery on 02.12.2014 and on 20.12.2014, was walking in the forest of Tijuca, only God and me, thanking him for all he had given me. Two months ago, I had climbed the Path of Gávea, with a terrific team, "Trails of Rio de Janeiro." I have great friends as Claudinho Silveira, Marcos Rabello, Paulinho Nurseries and others who promote these trails at Rio de Janeiro. Even not knowing the problem that I had, they were a colossal strength and up to the end with me. I saw the most widely read view of all of Rio de Janeiro. Crying for something that has already passed! Butter even melted. But it was the most spectacular rise and friends as noble and loyal. "What did you what did you?" Jean-Paul Sartre Sometimes I think about what I was and what I am. Bizarre comparison in relation to a disease and various diseases that made me what I am today. Anyway, let the facts: it could have been a successful person professionally or a sad person and defeated for not doing more. I ignore these options, for I am totally averse as indeed I am. I never felt so happy in my life, so much heart and soul and hope. I always had a positive response from my psychologist about what I was and what I am. I will not speak in the past, do not remember and I must remember. I remember I got this on the life and works which have grown in life. God was a person who wrote beautiful things, but with letters bottles, stunned and paradoxical way. But I am forever grateful for everything he wrote and will continue writing, majestic and imperfectly. God is not the guy?
  22. 22. Tijuca Forest I can not attempt to describe something that many saw few enjoyed and never appreciated indeed. The Tijuca forest is a unique imagination for anyone, and it was for me. The beginning of a life full of hopes and love with the heart. One day you will see me climbing the Paineiras, Sumaré or large Tijuca peaks. Walking my 10, 15, 18 or 24 km every day and always doing my famous academy. I'm always uniform, with the shirt "My Story - Heart, Cancer, stroke and Pacemaker". Many find it funny. But it is the pure and sincere truth. I won and still winning every day, every hour, every minute and every second. That to me is the sheer force of will that exists in the world and would not trade for anything and anyone ... "It is better to be silent and let people think you are a jerk wants to talk and end the doubt." Abraham Lincoln Sometimes I think just like that. I'd better keep quiet and let the doubt inflict on people's minds. But I can not (laughing). It is much stronger than me. But for a well needed and expose a bit to my life, some people need to know what happened to me. It's something called, law of return. I think you know what it is? Anyway, the people who harvest the plant, plant some more bad things and other plant good things. For me, it's always good to talk to people who have reaped good results, it does me good. Now, those who planted and not harvested little or nothing, I always help with a friend sentence. I always have a phrase in mind for each situation. Some accept, reflect and others do not care. Well, I'm here to help, only accept. My law of return is overflowing with joy and happiness, so I'm always willing to help. Maybe you're not the next? Just warning you, do not charge anything. It's free.
  23. 23. Our lives I am so happy to tell something that had never put on paper in bottles letters and with a touch of emotion and gratitude for so many people. It's such a relief to write something so beautiful and wonderful that happened to me. It could have happened to anyone, but hope to happen to me, it was something incredible. I had the heart to write things not remember more and I'm sorry if you do not remember everything. Fortunately the focus is always that, the simple truth of a true story. Always remember to return something and write again, because the cycle never closes, it is continuous. I came this little poem by Gonçalves Dias, who says: "My land has palm trees, | Where sings Sabia; | Birds that sing here, | not sing like there ... ". This beautiful poem is the truth I feel for Rio de Janeiro, for we can not have palm trees and thrushes as there are here. Whenever I walk by the immense and tortuous Tijuca Forest, bring me amazing memories. I remember when I tried to remember a poem and frustrated me when I realized that no longer remembered more. It was a poem made in third grade, many would not remember, but I remember, but it was forgotten through my thoughts. One day, climbing the forest, remembered as if it were something I knew and never would forget. They were precious seconds and a joyful cry. Remember poetry so pure and simple is beautiful too. A few seconds later, I forgot the sweet words of a verse again forgotten by me. I remember it was on the water, about mermaids and treasure. One day I remember with tenderness and affection that a beautiful poem deserves to have. This is the end of my book, which tells a true story full of pride, love and peace. Hope you enjoyed. Because I sure loved ... "Patience is not only an energy." George Sand Patience is such a powerful energy that we always have to have it in our hearts. I lately do not have much patience with things that come up in my life, because I want to yesterday and not for the distant future. But it takes a lot of patience intact and refreshed every second. It gives me strength to continue taking my long journey of life, for people who believe in my words of love and happiness.
  24. 24. Photos
  25. 25. Letters and Poem The prose is what feeds the soul and the spirit. I hope you like my prose, as is done with all the giant heart that I have. "Being happy is for those who have courage." Dona Canô Really happiness is something outrageous for me. I can not describe in words how much it is beautiful. Being happy is for those who can and have the courage to say it so as singular and unique to the listener. Dona Canô, you were a brave person. Amen to you ... "Recreate your life, always, always. Remove stones and plant rose bushes and makes sweets. Resumes." Cora Coralina I recreate my life constantly! Like them come beautiful things and them came the most beautiful things yet, and everything is transformed into something wonderful. Life is a lesson to be displayed every second. We can not let life settle and be simple spectators of their own will. We must be the people who make our own orchestra. That's life being lived. My life, I've traced. And you? "More hope in my footsteps than sadness on my shoulders." Cora Coralina In my footsteps there are no sorrows. Only count on the joys that life gives me and nothing else. For lead sorrows, if I can live intense joys. The slumped shoulders before my annoyances, do not exist in my tired back, disillusionment. I'm an expert, but we have to live them more and become strong in front of their disappointments. So I always say that the legs are the trajectory of our existence. For without them, would not live and not gozaríamos of a pure and divine beauty, which is a walk without additional weights on their shoulders. "Do not mourn what might have been lost and astray and never came back." Cora Coralina Life leads us to wrong paths always, throughout his life. We must have the manhood to know which path to take. Always I had a peculiar thought regarding the paths to be plotted. I remember with great nostalgia, of a conversation I had with my wife. It was late at night, a starry sky, beautiful by the way. We talked about ways to follow, before
  26. 26. giant and enormous obstacles that we should take. However, we should follow the right road together. I always said the same thing: we have two paths to be followed. One was the shortest route, and may be faster, but more uncertain. The other was the twisting and winding path full of obstacles, but this would be the walk that would lead to happiness. We take the second path. Unfortunately death was right for her, she had died of cancer. Unfortunately we had no solution. Continued following the same path, tortuous, full of heartbreak, full of regrets overcome, full of dark caves, where I stayed for a long time. But the sun shone and a voice came saying I was on the right track. Even cross the same winding road, but with much more joy and love in the heart. These are feelings that always learn from our parents and grandparents. I swear, free and open heart of sorrows, I am very happy. They are clean in his teachings. "One must first find, then cut to reach the naked flesh of emotion." Claude Debussy I found the naked flesh of emotion a few times in my life. It is a pitiful sight, but felt it was necessary to get to the point where I was. The excitement did not exist and modesty did not shake anymore. Why get to this point in life? Do not know. I think it was a point that I needed to go. But time heals all wounds, especially the shattered and destroyed emotion. Today I am a young man, full of vigor and impeccable high spirits. I believe very much in pain that inflicts us for life, but not for the sheer pain of fact, but the maturity we build. "Poetry is both a cache and a speaker." Nadine Gordimer Poetry, the simple poetry of an old or a new writer, is a wonderful thing in the ears of educated people with heart and soul. It would be hypocritical to say that poetry should be told to the four winds and stimulated to know every child? Yes I think. I have full conviction that poetry yes, gross or not, should be estingada and designed the little heads of every human being. It would be good a speaker, giant and the size of a building. So everyone would know the poems we hide under the heart. "All that is unknown is considered by magnificent." Tacit Nothing is so beautiful as the love we feel for the people helpless health and soul. Unfortunately people do not remember the basic meaning of life, which is health. The aim of this site is to promote the health above all. I'm not ashamed to tell my cases and say how much it was hard for me to get out of where I was. Were over 10 years a lot of fight, a lot of pain, a lot of bad feelings and despair inaudible to you, but torture for me. However, I had the chance to fight and see that life is filled with joy and will to live. To lie for nothing and not get up and get a little sun! I think the very people who need help
  27. 27. or families who need support. I wonder how hard it is to know you have a disease, but the cure is denied, denied by the taxpayers themselves, not just the government. I am sad to know that bad things that speak of diseases that are fully cured or have a decent treatment for survival, are forgotten. Today, I remembered Fernando Pessoa, that went like this: ". I have in me all the dreams of the world" I have this dream of helping and welcoming people who need help, who need wisdom or who need a friendly hug. It does not hurt! Not really hurts! This feeds the soul and the heart of who makes it happen. Think about it... "If someone searches for health, asks first whether it is willing to avoid in the future the causes of disease; otherwise, refrains you to help him." Socrates The disease is one of the saddest things that exist. I do not judge a toothache with terminal cancer. The pain is the same, every human being reacts in adverse ways. Some may be sad, shaken, tearful etc. But pain is pain. I know how difficult it is going through a cancer in the family, my wife lived it and I lived it too directly. Tristíssimos were moments, though were moments of extreme and invigorating laughter. As well, you laugh with his wife at such a crucial, between life and death? Of course! We can never stop living and be happy the way life takes us. Fortunately, our house was attracting many dear friends and wonderful people. Always going on Friday or Saturday and returned on Sunday. It was a will of savory, sweet, drinks, games etc. It was the life that I could provide for her, a life of joy and love with your best friends. Everyone knew of malignant tumors and did not care about that. Only her presence was enough to keep the beautiful, serene and full of peace house. I do not know if I said her name, I think it hid this information not to further expose your beautiful memory. His name was Ana Paula, beautiful, strong and fearless character like never saw. She had no measures to nothing, if want to dance, dance. If you wanted to get out, get out. If you wanted to drive, driving. The effort to live, came naturally and the will to live was always exposed and never contained. We had many fights, various operations, hospitalizations, tests, medicines, but always with a broad smile and will always be what she was, happy! I've always had a very famous phrase, which went like this: Whenever my, always yours, always our ... "Sometimes things just are what appear to be no big deal." Charles Bukowski Am I crazy? I do not know if I am. Only following a path that I think fair and honest with me and the people who need me. It can be crazy or not, but I think both things that follow my journey and that open doors as expeças. I believe in things as they should come naturally. I'm not a crazy, swept in unclean hair, knocking on doors, looking for something to say. I seek an identity for my life, one truth to my life and simple harmony
  28. 28. of all the facts. That to me, is not madness but facts to be plotted and perpetrated on the world. World so huge! I wanting to embrace the whole world. I think I reached the beginning of the question. I'm not crazy, not just wanna hold one person at a time. "We're all going to die, that circus! That alone should cause us to love each other, but do not." Charles Bukowski We will all die. Indeed! Arguably is a natural process, biological and morally fit to any judgment. Only that people should love more, kiss more, hug more, do a lot of affection and other well-catchy things. But people do not do any of that. Fortunately I am a small and poor little poet who lives the illusions of other large and perfect writing masters and knowledge. It taught me a lot to think about and understand how much life is short, and worthless be disappointed with such small matters. I think always great, always in a great mood, so I can see how much I am happy and intend to bring this happiness to other people. That's the way I want to grow, live and die in a normal way. However, joyful in the eyes of people who believe or IRAM believe in my words, in a very distant future. "The most annoying in love is that it is the type of crime that requires an accomplice." Charles Baudelaire I hate love! Always complicate me with acts as simple and complex. Simple, why to love, do not need anything, just a love match. It would be so nice if we all had a key, and it could find a love reciprocated between two hearts. It would be the perfect love! But perfect love, is the exception. The complexes, complexes loves, these are totally out of context and out skillfully diagram. Fortunately we have something to control our anxiety among complexed hearts: calm. Yes, it really is the search for love I speak with all and absolute reason. Today, it is difficult to find people who consider themselves able to love, to relate, to know, to take a chance, however small. I think too much in relationships I've had, and I see that learned a lot in every situation. I am very cautious in love someone, but if love is forever. So let's not get simple and complex love for our lives. Let's just look for the heart that beats for each other. "A dead soul is a completely conformed soul." Charles Peguy I do not believe in souls that are supported only on a knife edge or conformed not to exist. The soul is everything in a person's life. I have a wonderful soul, full of a lot of hope and full of joy. People who delude themselves and say they are shaped, are completely wrong. Every human being has a soul, sad or happy. Why not bring your soul for happiness, for harmony of good friends and prejudice-free. Life would be a
  29. 29. perfectly human thing, before all that happens in the world. I think the people who do not have a pious soul and lacking affection. Unfortunately there are people who go through problems, and these problems always have a solution. Imagine a child with cancer, about one adult to die without a heart, people with strokes, strokes and even a deep depression. They are horrible and unimaginable things to human eyes. I went through all this: I had two open heart operations, had two are celebrating stroke, deep depression, I put a pacemaker and also suffered with cancer my wife. Now I ask you a single question: My soul was dead on the conformity of life? At all, he has always been and always will be alive before any sacrifice that I will spend in the future. I do not think that my life will be a bed of roses or flowering with orange trees. Unfortunately I will have to operate again, again and again, until God calls me. It makes me sad and unhappy with the soul resigned to living like this forever? Of course not! I will have several surgeries to exchange battery for pacemaker and I will have two more open- heart operations to switch the valves of my heart. Thank God I have the strength to fight and courage to do what I want. Now I ask you a question: And you, my friend and friend, you have a soul formed before the wonder that life can provide? Sorry, but you really need much talking to someone and see that everything, absolutely everything, is well worth living. '' ... If you live judging people, have no time to love them ... '' Mother Teresa I would have no more love to give people? Does my love is as empty as the cold wind of winter? Does my thoughts about love are dry and arid as the summer of the Sahara? I do not know and do not answer this question so difficult for me right now. I'm sure the love I feel for the people is huge, the size of the world, but do not feel well today. Because? I had a wonderful night's sleep and the pillow's side, was the most beautiful person and without malice at heart, my dog called Pitty. In fact, it is Brand Pitty, called for my wife. Anyway, do what! I woke up in the morning like I always do and I asked the question to God: I want to be happy or sad today? I had a definite and as little conclusive answer to this day. I was always so happy, happy, happy, kind, affectionate, human and many other things that matter to me. But now, I am nothing. No one wants an empty body, among other empty bodies walking around without feelings and soul. Did Mother Teresa could help me answer my question of love? Just seeing the lovely smile, I feel thrilled. But what the love I feel, where is it? I do not know, I have no idea and I swear it is not under my pillow. "It has always remember that skin wrinkles, the hair becomes white, the days turn into years, but most importantly does not change: your inner strength." Mother Teresa
  30. 30. People age. Become more vivid and less vivid. Become more mature and less mature. Become less wrinkled and more wrinkled. Become happier and less unhappy. We could for thousands of situations that happen to a person from a young age and old age itself. I do not know if I'm getting old, with my white hair, my unshaven and wrinkles appearing between the eyes. I know I'm getting mature and aware that the world belongs to the older, but old exacerbated maturity. I know the word exacerbated, may contain something more exaggerated or something that has increased exponentially. But I do not say in this sense, but in the zeal of projection that we have to have with the people around us and the world in front of us. Thank God, I am a mature person, exacerbated, exaggerated and happy with my controversial aspects. However, that is not? I write what I think, what goes through my heart and so maintain a healthy dialogue. We become happier people from now on, always taking follow with a pinch of love, hope, joy and happiness. This is what is lacking to make the world more human. Please, let's forget the diseases. I have thousands of health problems, I am more happy and content, what matters and that is what makes me happy. "All human beings have extraordinary desires. There are times when you rejoices with things, others in which they grieves over. The ups and downs are part of life of each. The most important in this life is to do something that is beneficial to others. You must truly have an altruistic attitude:. This is what gives meaning to life "Dalai Lama I was being totally beneficial to my own reason. I was not thinking of others, only me. This attitude was wrong, selfish, harmful myself. How can I think about being something I'm not. All human beings are extraordinary in their own way, and we have to be rejubilados on the good things and sad, in their moments of high and low spirits. The meaning of human existence, is given in control of true meaning of life, which is true love. "This is my simple religion There is no need for temples;. There is no need for complicated philosophy Our own brain, our own heart is our temple;. The philosophy is kindness." Dalai Lama Kindness is the most natural thing in a religion. I am Roman Catholic Apostolic, and within my religious views, I am a Espiritism well. I know that many people make of their God and their own divine person. I believe much of it, each with their religion and living in peace with each other. This is all coming goodness of people's hearts. We can not believe that only "reading" is what you say. For philosophy comes from within and each, in a spontaneous interpretation of life and faith. The philosophy is kindness that we carry within us and we make it to expand to others in a natural and simple way. I wish I could say nice things to people. But people need to be open to accept and
  31. 31. understand my words, for they are mine. The interpretation of the listener, comes from the philosophy of those who live and believe. We will accept things as they are: learning, teaching, and taking care saying. This is the best wisdom that exists within every religion. "Being happy is to stop being a victim of the problems and become an author of history itself. You know talk about himself. It is not to be afraid of your own feelings ..." Augusto Cury I am a victim of my own history and I do not want people to think I'm a poor guy. I am worthy of respect and desire respect from anyone. I'm not a patient! I am a person alive and spontaneous character, latent and sure I have much to offer. I know I'm not a great writer, but what I do brings benefits to the poor and needy and bring humanity to those who need love and care. I do not walk the Paineiras, Sumaré and Picos why I like, why do I want to feel the need to be worthy of honorable adventurers. I like to feel the adrenaline in the heart and the blood pounding through my arteries. I love to take picture, because that keeps me alive and full, this is something wonderful to see and feel the green in the pictures. I enjoy writing, why the ideology and the sincerity of each writer, makes me mature and grow as a person every second. I do not write for me, but for people who feel the excitement that spring from my heart. They may have errors or Portuguese grammars failures, but the text does not come from my subconscious, but the bowels of a brave and fearless heart. I have my projects in media around the world, not only in Brazil, because I believe that I speak and write, should be read by anyone. I'm writing a book about my life, telling sad stories, but human and real, that can make a person cry with emotion. Following now for volunteering: a challenge. I can really change the way of thinking and acting, and I know I will learn a lot from the stories that I will listen and absorb. That's my little life, running and full of obstacles, which drive very well and of itself and capable way. Unfortunately I can not take a course, as there are neural interfaces that prevent me, but I'm trying to get them back. Unfortunately nothing is so easy and simple in life. My psychologist always asks me whether I want the life I had before. I always answer: to live life as it should be lived. This is me, cheerful, loving, happy and able to embrace the world. So, my dear friend, I'm not a sad person, much less bitter suffering. I am a free person, and able to jump delta and paragliding. "The award by a well-made thing is to have it done." Ralph Waldo Emerson Always we deserve an award before the conquest achieved. But that prize would that be? Gold for first place. I do not believe it and so little believe we have awards to be achieved, if not dedicate ourselves even more to the purposes we deserve. Life is short
  32. 32. and it should be lived intensely and fully before any victory. We need many people capable of doing good and not achieve a prize at the end of each day. This is the fight that I have with myself, because awards are not enough me. I want to see the smile, mischievous, a child with cancer in remission. That smile has no prize! "What we call sin in others, for us is experience." Ralph Waldo Emerson The experience of life is a magnificent thing. I wish I could have the life experience of many years ago. But it comes with time, with the problems and the solutions obtained in this arduous route. I grew up a lot over the years and were extremely perilous times, but with an invaluable life value. Are the experiences that we must always to test and enhance the victory that we must always achieve. "Whenever you can, talk of love and with love for someone. It's good in the ears of those who hear and soul of the speaker." Sister Dulce For some time now I do not write about love or happiness. I do not know if I lost the tone or gave time to the things that make me so well. Honestly I do not know what happened, but I'm here to try to correct my mistake and be able to write about the most beautiful thing in the world, which is love. The words of Sister Dulce is living proof that love is such a beautiful and complex gift, only who knows intende.

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