2. Mind your body language *adapted from: http://www.slideshare.net/jaimelavie/successful-flirting-seducing-and-dating In the initial stages, how you say things is more important than what you say. Pay attention to: Appearance, tone of voice, energy, joyful behaviour …

12. ACTIVE LISTENING Good listening is not just about shutting up and letting the other person talk. Good listening is about giving good 'feedback‘. This involves giving both verbal and non-verbal signals to show that you are paying attention , and that you are interested.

13. NON-VERBAL FEEDBACK Effective signals : nodding, smiling, responsive facial expressions, leaning forwards, … and general positive body language such as 'open' posture and posture/gesture echo..

14. VERBAL FEEDBACK Good signals : Use expressions like "mm-hmm", "yeah", "mmm", "ah", “great”, … They show interest or agreement and encourage the other to continue

15. HUMOR Humor is necessary for succesful flirting. But inappropriate use can kill a promising flirtation stone dead in a matter of seconds. Fact : BOTH TRUST AND ATTRACTION INCREASE WHEN A LIGHTHEARTED APPROACH IS USED.

16. RECIPROCAL DISCLOSURE (TMI too quickly can work against you) Disclosure of almost any personal information is a move towards intimacy. The key to succesful flirting or enhanced romantic relationships is to escalate the level of intimacy gradually and in a balanced way.

18. Eyes are very powerful ! If, after making eye contact and briefly holding someones gaze, the other looks away and then looks back, you know (s)he is interested ! ---- DO NOT OVERDO EYECONTACT ----

19. Love Stare

21. The five secret signals that someone is flirting with you!

22. It takes us between 90 seconds and four minutes to decide if we are attracted to someone Before you've even spoken to the person you've got your eye on, the way you've walked and stood is more than 80 per cent of their first impression of you !

27. Relationship Elevator

28. Politeness and Rudeness Interesting how our politeness peaks with friends and decreases with intimates (lovers, parents, siblings) http://www.metacafe.com/watch/3475766/dealing_with_rudeness/

29. Relationships rarely stand still over time. If you get complacent a relationship can stagnate. Food for thought: “The only thing that rolls along on its own is going downhill.” WHERE ARE YOU IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS WITH FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVERS? You can change the direction if it is worth it and you make an effort.

30. Limerence or Love? Jon & Kate: You Decide. Tennov differentiates between limerence and other emotions by asserting that love involves concern for the other person's welfare and feeling. During the height of limerence, thoughts of the limerent object (or person) are both persistent, involuntary and intrusive. Limerence is first and foremost a condition of cognitive obsession. The bulk of relationships, however, according to Tennov, are those between a limerent person and a nonlimerent other, i.e. limerent-nonlimerent bonding. These bonds are characterized by unequal reciprocation.

33. Signs of Divorce (see link to file: “Signs of a Divorce ahead”)

36. Stages of Grief

39. Go to the multimedia library for Chapter 9 in “My communications Lab” and watch “Chairs Office” video on unequal power in relationships. Comment on this video.