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Faculdade de Psicologia da Universidade de Lisboa
Faculdade de Psicologia e Ciências da Educação
da Universidade de Coimbra

Intimacy and sexual desire in couple relationships:
The paradox of couple differentiation
Luana Cunha das Neves Teixeira Ferreira

Supervisors:
Isabel Narciso, PhD & Rosa Novo, PhD
Interuniversity Doctoral Program in Clinical
Psychology: Family Psychology and Intervention

December 19th, 2013
Theoretical Framework
Couple sexuality:
neglected research
theme

Individual;
college–age
samples

Focus on sexual
frequency and other
narrow variables

Desire & Intimacy:
essential to couple
satisfaction

Lack of studies
investigating
associations

Definition and
assessment problems
regarding construct.

Clinical models of couple therapy:
Increase emotional intimacy and desire will follow
Sexual desire decreases
(Basson, 2002; Regan & Bersheid, 1999)

?

Intimacy increases ?
(Acker & Davies, 1992, Baumeister &
Bratslavsky, 1999)

Ferreira, L. C., Narciso, I., & Novo, R. F. (2012). Intimacy, sexual desire and differentiation in couplehood: A
theoretical and methodological review. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 38(3), 263–80.
Theoretical Framework
Why do healthy couples with high
emotional intimacy also report low desire?
Can ‘too much intimacy’ dampen desire?

No studies
addressing these
models

Differentiation of self (DoS):
The ability to maintain a sense of autonomy while in a deep
intimate relationship
How can differentiation of self contribute
to the understanding of the association
between intimacy and desire?
Ferreira, L. C., Narciso, I., & Novo, R. F. (2012). Intimacy, sexual desire and differentiation in couplehood: A
theoretical and methodological review. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 38(3), 263–80.
Initial question
How are the processes of
intimacy and differentiation of self

defined and articulated,
and in which ways do they associate with
sexual desire and couple satisfaction?

Gender

Cohabitation
duration

Age

Children
Conceptual Framework
Interaction
Information
Sensitizing concepts
Language
Language
Social experience Communication
Lived reality
Circularity

Social construccionism

Systemic complexity
Eco-systemic theory
Post-positivism

Patterns
Context
Networks
Development

Heuristics
Chaos
Multiverse
reality
Methodological Framework
N=492

Couples

Individuals in a couples relationship

N=33

N=428

Self report Questionnaire:
Intimacy (MSIS); Differentiation of self (DSI-R);
Sexual desire (HISD); Couples satisfaction (EASAVIC)
Joint couple interview:
Intimacy; Sexual desire Differentiation of
self; Trajectories; Inter-relationships

Qualitative studies

Quantitative studies
Validation studies

Intimacy

Desire &
Differentiation

Couple
Discrepancies

Predictive
models
Qualitative studies
Qualitative analysis: Constructivist grounded theory
Study 1
How is intimacy defined by couples who are
reflecting together on their experience of intimacy?
Which influences do they perceive as impacting
their couple intimacy ?

Ferreira, L. C., Narciso, I., & Novo, R. F. (2013). Authenticity, work and change: A qualitative
study on couple intimacy Families, Relationships and Societies, 2 (3), 339-354.
COUPLE INTIMACY

Methods
• Constructivist grounded theory
• Semi-structured, joint interviews
• N=33 couples

Study 1 + Study 2
COUPLE INTIMACY
Selected results

What is couple intimacy ?

Authenticity

Sharing

understanding

Trust
COUPLE INTIMACY
Selected results

Work
Limits
Change

What factors are perceived as
impacting intimacy?

Work schedule (-)
Feeling rewarded (+)

Boundaries with subsystems (-)
(children, family of origin)

Routine (-)
New experiences (+)
Study 2
How do couples perceive the articulation and
development of sexual desire and differentiation of
self through the couple relationship?
Which factors do couples perceive as influencing
desire and differentiation processes and trajectories?

Ferreira, L. C., Fraenkel. P., Narciso, I., & Novo, R. F. Is committed desire intentional? A
qualitative exploration of sexual desire and differentiation of self in couples (submitted)
SEXUAL DESIRE AND DIFFERENTIATION
Selected results

Desire
strategies

Desire
factors
• Enhancing:
• Change
• Autonomy
• Ease
• Disturbing:
• Stress
• Conflict
• Children

•
•
•
•

Innovation
Effort
Sharing
Autonomy

Differentiation
strategies
• Fostering
personal
interests
• Investing in a
positive
connection
• Enhancing
personal
integrity
SEXUAL DESIRE AND DIFFERENTIATION
Selected results
Quantitative studies
Quantitative measures
Variable

Self-report measure

Intimacy

Miller Social Intimacy Scale - MSIS

Cronbach
Alpha α
.92

Miller & Lefcourt (1982), PV: Ferreira, Narciso & Novo (2010)

Sexual desire

Hurlbert Index of sexual Desire - HISD

.95

Hurlbert & Apt (1992); PV: Ferreira, Narciso & Novo (2010)

Differentiation of
self (DoS)

Couple
satisfaction

Differentiation of Self Inventory Revised - DSI-R

.95

Skowron & Friedlander (1998); PV: Relvas et al.(2013)

Scale for the Evaluation of Satisfaction in areas of Couple
Life - EASAVIC
Narciso & Costa (1996)

.97
Study 3
How are differences and similarities between the
partners related to gender and to individual levels
of sexual desire, differentiation of self and couple
satisfaction?

Ferreira, L. C., Narciso, I., Novo, R. F., & Pereira, C. Partner’s similarity in differentiation of self
contributes to higher couple sexual desire: A quantitative dyadic study. (submitted)
DYADIC ASSOCIATIONS OF INTIMACY, DESIRE, DIFFERENTIATION AND
COUPLE SATISFACTION

Methods
• Quantitative analysis:
• t-tests, correlations
• multi-level hierarchical linear analysis
• 2 levels: couple and individual

• Self-report questionnaires (MSIS; DSI-R; HISD)
• N=33 couples
DYADIC ASSOCIATIONS OF DESIRE, DIFFERENTIATION AND COUPLE
SATISFACTION

Individual
level

Individual score
(e.g., sexual desire)

S1

Couple
level

S1

(S 1 + S 2)

2

Couple average score
(i.e., Couple average desire)

S2

│ S 1 - S 2│
Couple discrepancy score
(i.e., Desire discrepancy score)
DYADIC ASSOCIATIONS OF DESIRE, DIFFERENTIATION (DOS)AND COUPLE
SATISFACTION

Selected results

Hypothesis

Partners within a couple will show
less discrepancy of DoS than
unrelated individuals
Women will have the same chances of
being the lower desire partners as men
Couple discrepancy regarding DoS
will be inversely associated with
individual desire
Average couple desire and DoS will
be positively associated with average
couple satisfaction.

Similarity hypothesis not
supported
Women reported lower desire
than men
Confirmed hypothesis
DoS similarity
Desire
DoS similarity predicted desire
Confirmed hypothesis
Satisfaction

Desire + DoS
DYADIC ASSOCIATIONS OF DESIRE, DIFFERENTIATION AND COUPLE
SATISFACTION

Selected results: Multi-level analysis

The couple discrepancy of DoS negatively predicted individual sexual
desire, even after controlling for sex and other variables.
Study 4
How can sexual desire and intimacy explain the

potential contributes of differentiation of self for
couple satisfaction?

How do these relationships associate with gender?

Ferreira, L. C., & Novo, R. F., Narciso, I., & Pereira, C. Predictors of sexual desire and couple
satisfaction: Intimacy and differentiation of self in couple relationships. (submitted)
PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION

Methods
• Qualitative analysis:
• Structural equation modeling with latent variables
• Multi-group analysis
• Self report questionnaires (MSIS; DSI-R; HISD;
EASAVIC)
• N= 428 individuals in a committed relationship
PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION
Selected results

Proposed model
PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION
Selected results

Alternative model
PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION
Selected results

Better representation of the psychological process involving
the relationship between DoS and couple satisfaction.
PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION
Multi-group analysis
n men = 174

n women = 264
Main contributes
Research
•
•
•
•

Empirically-based dimensional definition of intimacy
Strong perception of impact of the multiple subsystems
Diversity of sexual desire trajectories
Couples perception of differentiation of self processes and
trajectory
• Structural role of DoS in desire, intimacy and couple satisfaction
• Central role of sexual desire as a predictor of intimacy and
satisfaction
Main contributes
Clinical
•
•
•
•

Couples agentic posture (strategies vs spontaneity)
Integration of sharing and autonomy
Role of authenticity
Relevance on a dyadic perspective regarding desire issues in
couplehood.
• Awareness of fusion might trigger the couple’s promotion of DoS
• Assessment: Work stress related factors in intimacy and desire
• Prevention: Turning points in desire, intimacy and DoS
trajectories
Selected limitations
Cross-sectional study
Convenience samples
• Low diversity sample: White, well-educated, heterosexual
• Mostly satisfied couples
• No assessment of psychopathology or therapeutic intervention

Quantitative studies
•
•
•
•

Multicollinearity; Interdependence
Lack of sub-scale analysis
DSI-R issues with the assessment of both high and low DoS
MSIS targeted love and affection dimensions of intimacy

Qualitative studies: Joint interview
Future studies
Longitudinal analysis of
trajectories:
Diary records

Clinical samples:
Couples referred for
therapy

Quantitative studies:
Actor partner
interdependence models

Therapeutic processes of
DoS, desire and intimacy:
Observational strategies

Balance between autonomy & togetherness
• Risk regulating systems: self-protection vs connectedness goals
• Interpersonal neurobiology
Faculdade de Psicologia da Universidade de Lisboa
Faculdade de Psicologia e Ciências da Educação
da Universidade de Coimbra

Intimacy and sexual desire in couple relationships:
The paradox of couple differentiation
Luana Cunha das Neves Teixeira Ferreira

Supervisors:
Isabel Narciso, PhD & Rosa Novo, PhD
Interuniversity Doctoral Program in Clinical
Psychology: Family Psychology and Intervention

December 19th, 2013

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Doctoral defenseluanacunhaferreira2013

  • 1. Faculdade de Psicologia da Universidade de Lisboa Faculdade de Psicologia e Ciências da Educação da Universidade de Coimbra Intimacy and sexual desire in couple relationships: The paradox of couple differentiation Luana Cunha das Neves Teixeira Ferreira Supervisors: Isabel Narciso, PhD & Rosa Novo, PhD Interuniversity Doctoral Program in Clinical Psychology: Family Psychology and Intervention December 19th, 2013
  • 2. Theoretical Framework Couple sexuality: neglected research theme Individual; college–age samples Focus on sexual frequency and other narrow variables Desire & Intimacy: essential to couple satisfaction Lack of studies investigating associations Definition and assessment problems regarding construct. Clinical models of couple therapy: Increase emotional intimacy and desire will follow Sexual desire decreases (Basson, 2002; Regan & Bersheid, 1999) ? Intimacy increases ? (Acker & Davies, 1992, Baumeister & Bratslavsky, 1999) Ferreira, L. C., Narciso, I., & Novo, R. F. (2012). Intimacy, sexual desire and differentiation in couplehood: A theoretical and methodological review. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 38(3), 263–80.
  • 3. Theoretical Framework Why do healthy couples with high emotional intimacy also report low desire? Can ‘too much intimacy’ dampen desire? No studies addressing these models Differentiation of self (DoS): The ability to maintain a sense of autonomy while in a deep intimate relationship How can differentiation of self contribute to the understanding of the association between intimacy and desire? Ferreira, L. C., Narciso, I., & Novo, R. F. (2012). Intimacy, sexual desire and differentiation in couplehood: A theoretical and methodological review. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 38(3), 263–80.
  • 4. Initial question How are the processes of intimacy and differentiation of self defined and articulated, and in which ways do they associate with sexual desire and couple satisfaction? Gender Cohabitation duration Age Children
  • 5. Conceptual Framework Interaction Information Sensitizing concepts Language Language Social experience Communication Lived reality Circularity Social construccionism Systemic complexity Eco-systemic theory Post-positivism Patterns Context Networks Development Heuristics Chaos Multiverse reality
  • 6. Methodological Framework N=492 Couples Individuals in a couples relationship N=33 N=428 Self report Questionnaire: Intimacy (MSIS); Differentiation of self (DSI-R); Sexual desire (HISD); Couples satisfaction (EASAVIC) Joint couple interview: Intimacy; Sexual desire Differentiation of self; Trajectories; Inter-relationships Qualitative studies Quantitative studies Validation studies Intimacy Desire & Differentiation Couple Discrepancies Predictive models
  • 9. Study 1 How is intimacy defined by couples who are reflecting together on their experience of intimacy? Which influences do they perceive as impacting their couple intimacy ? Ferreira, L. C., Narciso, I., & Novo, R. F. (2013). Authenticity, work and change: A qualitative study on couple intimacy Families, Relationships and Societies, 2 (3), 339-354.
  • 10. COUPLE INTIMACY Methods • Constructivist grounded theory • Semi-structured, joint interviews • N=33 couples Study 1 + Study 2
  • 11. COUPLE INTIMACY Selected results What is couple intimacy ? Authenticity Sharing understanding Trust
  • 12. COUPLE INTIMACY Selected results Work Limits Change What factors are perceived as impacting intimacy? Work schedule (-) Feeling rewarded (+) Boundaries with subsystems (-) (children, family of origin) Routine (-) New experiences (+)
  • 13. Study 2 How do couples perceive the articulation and development of sexual desire and differentiation of self through the couple relationship? Which factors do couples perceive as influencing desire and differentiation processes and trajectories? Ferreira, L. C., Fraenkel. P., Narciso, I., & Novo, R. F. Is committed desire intentional? A qualitative exploration of sexual desire and differentiation of self in couples (submitted)
  • 14. SEXUAL DESIRE AND DIFFERENTIATION Selected results Desire strategies Desire factors • Enhancing: • Change • Autonomy • Ease • Disturbing: • Stress • Conflict • Children • • • • Innovation Effort Sharing Autonomy Differentiation strategies • Fostering personal interests • Investing in a positive connection • Enhancing personal integrity
  • 15. SEXUAL DESIRE AND DIFFERENTIATION Selected results
  • 17. Quantitative measures Variable Self-report measure Intimacy Miller Social Intimacy Scale - MSIS Cronbach Alpha α .92 Miller & Lefcourt (1982), PV: Ferreira, Narciso & Novo (2010) Sexual desire Hurlbert Index of sexual Desire - HISD .95 Hurlbert & Apt (1992); PV: Ferreira, Narciso & Novo (2010) Differentiation of self (DoS) Couple satisfaction Differentiation of Self Inventory Revised - DSI-R .95 Skowron & Friedlander (1998); PV: Relvas et al.(2013) Scale for the Evaluation of Satisfaction in areas of Couple Life - EASAVIC Narciso & Costa (1996) .97
  • 18. Study 3 How are differences and similarities between the partners related to gender and to individual levels of sexual desire, differentiation of self and couple satisfaction? Ferreira, L. C., Narciso, I., Novo, R. F., & Pereira, C. Partner’s similarity in differentiation of self contributes to higher couple sexual desire: A quantitative dyadic study. (submitted)
  • 19. DYADIC ASSOCIATIONS OF INTIMACY, DESIRE, DIFFERENTIATION AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Methods • Quantitative analysis: • t-tests, correlations • multi-level hierarchical linear analysis • 2 levels: couple and individual • Self-report questionnaires (MSIS; DSI-R; HISD) • N=33 couples
  • 20. DYADIC ASSOCIATIONS OF DESIRE, DIFFERENTIATION AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Individual level Individual score (e.g., sexual desire) S1 Couple level S1 (S 1 + S 2) 2 Couple average score (i.e., Couple average desire) S2 │ S 1 - S 2│ Couple discrepancy score (i.e., Desire discrepancy score)
  • 21. DYADIC ASSOCIATIONS OF DESIRE, DIFFERENTIATION (DOS)AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Selected results Hypothesis Partners within a couple will show less discrepancy of DoS than unrelated individuals Women will have the same chances of being the lower desire partners as men Couple discrepancy regarding DoS will be inversely associated with individual desire Average couple desire and DoS will be positively associated with average couple satisfaction. Similarity hypothesis not supported Women reported lower desire than men Confirmed hypothesis DoS similarity Desire DoS similarity predicted desire Confirmed hypothesis Satisfaction Desire + DoS
  • 22. DYADIC ASSOCIATIONS OF DESIRE, DIFFERENTIATION AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Selected results: Multi-level analysis The couple discrepancy of DoS negatively predicted individual sexual desire, even after controlling for sex and other variables.
  • 23. Study 4 How can sexual desire and intimacy explain the potential contributes of differentiation of self for couple satisfaction? How do these relationships associate with gender? Ferreira, L. C., & Novo, R. F., Narciso, I., & Pereira, C. Predictors of sexual desire and couple satisfaction: Intimacy and differentiation of self in couple relationships. (submitted)
  • 24. PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Methods • Qualitative analysis: • Structural equation modeling with latent variables • Multi-group analysis • Self report questionnaires (MSIS; DSI-R; HISD; EASAVIC) • N= 428 individuals in a committed relationship
  • 25. PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Selected results Proposed model
  • 26. PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Selected results Alternative model
  • 27. PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Selected results Better representation of the psychological process involving the relationship between DoS and couple satisfaction.
  • 28. PREDICTING SEXUAL DESIRE AND COUPLE SATISFACTION Multi-group analysis n men = 174 n women = 264
  • 29. Main contributes Research • • • • Empirically-based dimensional definition of intimacy Strong perception of impact of the multiple subsystems Diversity of sexual desire trajectories Couples perception of differentiation of self processes and trajectory • Structural role of DoS in desire, intimacy and couple satisfaction • Central role of sexual desire as a predictor of intimacy and satisfaction
  • 30. Main contributes Clinical • • • • Couples agentic posture (strategies vs spontaneity) Integration of sharing and autonomy Role of authenticity Relevance on a dyadic perspective regarding desire issues in couplehood. • Awareness of fusion might trigger the couple’s promotion of DoS • Assessment: Work stress related factors in intimacy and desire • Prevention: Turning points in desire, intimacy and DoS trajectories
  • 31. Selected limitations Cross-sectional study Convenience samples • Low diversity sample: White, well-educated, heterosexual • Mostly satisfied couples • No assessment of psychopathology or therapeutic intervention Quantitative studies • • • • Multicollinearity; Interdependence Lack of sub-scale analysis DSI-R issues with the assessment of both high and low DoS MSIS targeted love and affection dimensions of intimacy Qualitative studies: Joint interview
  • 32. Future studies Longitudinal analysis of trajectories: Diary records Clinical samples: Couples referred for therapy Quantitative studies: Actor partner interdependence models Therapeutic processes of DoS, desire and intimacy: Observational strategies Balance between autonomy & togetherness • Risk regulating systems: self-protection vs connectedness goals • Interpersonal neurobiology
  • 33. Faculdade de Psicologia da Universidade de Lisboa Faculdade de Psicologia e Ciências da Educação da Universidade de Coimbra Intimacy and sexual desire in couple relationships: The paradox of couple differentiation Luana Cunha das Neves Teixeira Ferreira Supervisors: Isabel Narciso, PhD & Rosa Novo, PhD Interuniversity Doctoral Program in Clinical Psychology: Family Psychology and Intervention December 19th, 2013