1. Providing Positive Feedback
The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.
William James
Never, never let class members go home with a feeling that they are failures, that they can never learn
to speak before groups. If you permit them to do that, then they are worse off than if they had never
joined the course at all. They are likely to drop out and develop a far worse feeling of inferiority than
they had previously.
—Dale Carnegie, The Art of Dale Carnegie Training
The Purpose of Providing Positive Feedback
Praise and attention may
easily have a profound effect
on an individual’s entire life.
—Dale Carnegie
Anytime a participant speaks or acts, the trainer has an opportunity to respond to the individual. The
response indicates that the trainer is listening and that the participant’s contributions are important.
The inverse of this could also be true.
Since Dale Carnegie Training® is primarily facilitation driven, responding adds to the session in several
ways: it moves the pace of the session along; it rewards idea sharing; it encourages risk taking; and it
builds a positive participatory adult learning environment.
Effective Responses:
 Offer encouragement
 Provide a feeling of victory
 Reassure participants that they are making progress toward objectives
 Keep the session moving at a brisk pace
 Help participants relate the training to their professional goals
The ultimate objective of a trainer’s response is to provide participants with positive, constructive
feedback that relates an observed strength to progress toward their training objectives. This can be

2. achieved primarily through providing genuine feedback that is considered encouraging by the participant.
Mr. Carnegie gave us guidance by stating that every comment that we make should be warm, friendly
and encouraging. And though our responses should be brief, whenever practical they are to be aimed at
the entire class and not just the person who has just spoken.
The Responding Process
An effective response is born out of close listening and observation of a participant, followed by
correlating that information with the knowledge that we have about his or her objectives for participating
in the training.
The structure of a response:
 Begins by highlighting a specific strength (what we observed)
 Is supported by evidence (based upon the observed performance)
 Relates the strength to participant and client objectives
Being very clear and specific is very important for a number of reasons:
a) it provides more meaning to the receiver
b) it keeps up the energy and pace in the training room
c) it helps us to remain time conscious
Practice the following format for conciseness:
 Strength or quality—related to the vision or session objectives (1 word)
 Evidence—brief, avoid re-telling (5 words or fewer)
 Relevance to the objectives and the learning of the entire class (10 words or fewer)
As is the case when developing the skill of coaching, responding requires that we look for connections—
closing of the gap—between the behaviors/attitudes demonstrated versus the desired outcomes stated by
way of vision statements; breakthrough commitments; session learning objectives; previous statements
made; organizational objectives, etc. Through our responses, we then highlight the progress being made
while providing evidence to add objectivity and credibility.

3. Don’t’
“Listening for the Bulls Eye ”
Listening for the Bull’s Eye
We must develop the ability to deliver responses that would be considered deep and meaningful versus
flattery or obvious. Flattery is often thought of as superficial, insincere praise, and perhaps obligatory
when given by a trainer. The obvious responses tend to be overly apparent and evident on the surface to
almost everyone; therefore, they can lack motivation and inspiration. A positive, insightful response can
reinforce an individual’s self-perception. These are the praise responses focused upon reinforcing
positive behaviors that the individual may have thought he or she possessed but was either not
convinced of, or was not sure, that others had noticed. The most meaningful responses tend to be those
that lead to breakthroughs. The participant’s breakthrough comes about as a result of the trainer’s
remarks and helps the participant uncover some quality that had gone unrecognized about him or
herself. This leads to the person having a self-discovery by thinking, ―I didn’t realize that about myself,
but I think the trainer is right.‖ The recognition and belief that he or she not only has this quality but that
perhaps there are other traits yet to be uncovered, can be like finding a diamond mine for one’s self-
esteem. The genuine way in which the response is delivered, reinforced by unmistakable evidence, can

4. make all the difference in whether the response is embraced or rejected by the person on the receiving
end.
What are the Types of Responses?
Responses generally fall into four different categories:
1. Highlighting: Giving sincere appreciation or praise based upon our observations, being cautious
to avoid the overly obvious.
2. Reinforcing: Stating a strength or quality the participant may be unsure of or uncertain of
how it relates to his or her vision. He/she may have simply not made the
connection.
3. Developmental: Molding, refining by our comments to help develop a strength.
4. Corrective: Inspiring a participant to new and different heights and challenges. As Mr. Carnegie
said, ―… lift the individual’s sights and give vision and faith in his or her own powers.‖
Ten Tips for Trainers—Responding
1. Recognize a strength in the participant and state why that strength is important and relevant.
2. Be brief: 10–20 seconds or fewer.
3. Be spontaneous as a result of active listening.
4. Focus on the participant and not on self.
5. Direct responses to the individual.
6. Direct the response to the individual, then direct the relevance to the entire group.
7. Direct the response to the entire class, with the participant as the subject of the recognition.
8. Make the response in the form of a (rhetorical) question.
9. Get the class to respond.
Ensure the response is person-centered. Do not reiterate what the participant already said or did.
Highlight a strength (―build confidence‖), relate the strength or equality to the participant’s vision, to
session objectives and to real-life relevance and applications.