1. MODULE 2
MANAGING STRESS
&
OBSTACLES
Nehemiah on the completion of Jerusalem’s
walls in the face of obstacles and threats:
“So the wall was completed on the twenty-fifth of
Elul, in fifty-two days. When all our enemies
heard about this, all the surrounding nations
were afraid and lost their self-confidence,
because they realised that this work had
been done with the help of our God.”
Nehemiah 6:15-16

2. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
BB LIFE SKILLS WORKBOOK
MODULE 2: MANAGING STRESS & OBSTACLES
“So the wall was completed on the twenty-fifth of Elul, in
fifty-two days. When all our enemies heard about this,
all the surrounding nations were afraid and lost their
self-confidence, because they realised that this work had
been
done with the help of our God.”
Nehemiah 6:15-16
Objectives
 You will learn to identify your core obstacles in life.
 You will understand that overcoming any negative emotions will empower you.
 You will understand what motivates you.
 You will learn how to face your their fears.
Learning Outcomes
At the end of the session, Boys you will:
1. Learn how to identify the core of an issue and deal with it, rather than livinge in the
past or with anxiety or fear.
2. Be able to apply the ABCD model to deal with their your fears.
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3. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
Identifying ANXIETY and FEAR
 Check the statements that describe how you feel right now.
 You feel anxious about going to school.,
 You have difficulty doing your school work.
 You feel negative about almost everything and nothing seems to work for you.
 You do not want to mix with friends or meet new people.
 You’ve lost your appetite.
 You feel stressed and uptight most of the time.
 You feel really scared about the future.
 You feel like nobody understands you.
 You spend hours in your room alone, thinking and worrying.
 You constantly worry about things which you cannot control or influence (for
example, starving children, world hunger, nuclear war).
One-to-One Sharing:
Share with a friend someone a situation in your life wheren you feel you were anxious
and afraid.
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4. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
Noticing ANGER
Check the pointers which you feel are appropriate will help for you
deal with your when you are angryer.
 Reflect and identify the reasons for why you are feeling angry.
 Write down how you feel in detail ands the reasons with yourself why you feel the
way you do.
 Talk to the person face-to-face about your feelings, in private.
 If the other person gets angry in return, focus the discussion try to stay on with your
feelings and do not broaden the discussions to other issues from the past.
 Use the energy from your anger to and do something positive and constructive to
remove yourself from the angry emotions (for example, going for a run or play some
games). This will help to dissipate the angry emotions.
 Do not let the angry scene keeps replaying itself in your mind as it will make you
revengeful.
 Do not justify your actions to anyone else. This is not helpful. Leave others out of the
quarrel. as iIncluding them couldan result in division and disunity., as Iit forces your
common friends to take sides.
 Let go when it is over. If you have expressed ityour feelings and spoken honestly,
there is nothing else you can do. You should not harbour resentment or guilt, and as
you should consider the case closed.
Here are two basic ground rules for expressing your anger:
 Do not use your hands (or any verbal abuse or physical violence) as this is a clear
sign that you have lost control of yourself and the situation.
 Make sure you do not regret your words or actions. This allows you to feel good
about yourself afterwards.
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5. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
Empowering Yourself With
Self-Awareness
The ABCD Model
In order to make changes in your life, you need to realize that it is your beliefs that
have a significant impact on your actions.
Using the ABCD model below, you will be able to change yourany negative mindset
and eventually change your actions or reactions.
ABCD Model What it means
The factors that What causes theyour
Activating Events feelings/emotions to arise?. This helps you to know
Wwhat triggers your feelings?.
The mental state at the time of processing the event.
Beliefs This helps you to know the ‘why’ of your actions.
The feelings created by myyour beliefs
Consequential feelings
The actions Iyou tooake because of myour
Decisive Actions feelings/emotions.
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6. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
An example of the ABCD Model
Two possible ways to a situation:
Negative Mindset Positive Mindset
Activating Events I was not promoted I was not promoted
People think I’m not There are some areas
Beliefs good enough I may improve upon.
Consequential I’m very angry
I feel the need to
feelings improve
I ask my officers how
Decisive Actions I quit
I may improve
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7. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
Applying the ABCD Model
Changing your beliefs will influence your decisive behaviour
Using the ABCD model, discuss with your group the following case
scenario :
Teck Ming does not really enjoy outdoor activities. The feeling gets worste when the
Company goes on expeditions or conducts rappelling or Omega Descent activities. He
hates expeditions for many reasons: the bugs, the heavy backpack and the long, endless
plodding. But these are tolerable when compared to activities involving height. Teck
Ming has a fear of heights.
He still clearly remembers the rapid beating of his heart and the growing fear he felt when
he looked down from the third floor during the Omega Descent in his recruits’ training
camp. In fact, that gnawing feeling had begun when he saw the Officers setting up the
apparatus. He didn’t really care that the Officers assured him that it iwas safe. Up to this
day, he cannot understand why Mr Soon, his Officer, shouted at him to leap.
How can Teck Ming change his belief to improve his experience in the
company?
Using the ABCD model worksheet, write down the experiences of Teck Ming. Record
the positive mindset that Teck Ming should harve to overcome his fear of heights.
Remember: If you change your negative mindset, it will allow you to be free from the
negative emotions that you have been holding on to.
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8. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
ABCD Model Worksheet
Negative Mindset Positive Mindset
Activating Events
Beliefs
Consequential
fFeelings
Decisive Actions
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9. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
FACING YOUR OBSTACLES
“I gain strength, courage and confidence by
every experience in which I must stop
and look fear in the face.”
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Check the pointers that will help you deal with your obstacles or
fears.
 I look at the positive and focus on them instead of the negative.
 I do not crowd my mind with everything I have to do. Instead I decide to do one thing
at a time and be happy with it.
 I talk to a friend whom I can trust about my feelings and fears.
 I write in a journal about how you I feel.
 I take up a hobby or sport that I enjoy to occupy my mind.
 I get out into the fresh air and exercise. This allows my energy to flow in a positive
way.
 I make a list of all the problems I have and work out which are important and which
are urgent.
What other things you can do to help you deal with your obstacles?
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10. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
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11. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES
OVERCOMING OBSTACLES IN YOUR LIFE :
Case Study
Samuel often wonders about how good it will be if he could turn back time. He looks
back at his Primary School days longingly, a time in his life when he even enjoyed going
to school. Now, he feels he has to juggle schoolwork, CCA and hours of tuition.
He also feels that going to BB gives him needless stress. The atmosphere is tense with
too much shouting and negativity. The Officers on parade hardly seem like the friendly
sort on Recruitment Day. Staying home on Saturdays doing nothing seems a far better
option.
Help Samuel analyze the problem with the following ABCD model worksheet.
Remember: changing your beliefs will change your behaviour.
Negative Mindset Positive Mindset
Activating Events
Beliefs
Consequential
Ffeelings
Decisive Actions
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