Part I of the webinar: “Motherhood Guilt or Job Dissatisfaction?” will… • help you decide if your thoughts about leaving the workforce are your own, or are influenced by others. • include a provocative discussion exploring whether motherhood “guilt” is well-founded or whether you have unrealistic expectations for balancing work and life.. • help you evaluate more deeply why you work and how you would replace your work drivers at home. And, • give you a clear framework for deciding if it is perception or reality for you, that the grass is indeed greener on the other side. For many women, a large factor in the “stay or go” decision is whether an alternative work structure is even possible. Part II of the webinar will help you “Exhaust Your Flexible Work Options.” Too many women assume flexibility is not an option or leave after one casual “ask.” This webinar discussion will help you determine if your job is a candidate for full or partial telecommuting, and how to make a professional case for flexibility. Looking beyond your current job, you’ll also learn where to look for other, more flexible opportunities and if an entrepreneurial venture would fit your work and broader life styles. Presenter: Kathryn Sollmann Kathryn Sollmann is the Managing Partner and Founder of 9 Lives for Women, a highly acclaimed, multi-channel blog site that helps women navigate work and life in nine stages from college through retirement years. Recognizing that it is too black and white to say that women are either “working” or “not working,” Kathryn’s website helps women with all the gray areas when they have one foot in or one foot out of the workforce. For more than a decade she has helped women stay in or re-enter the workforce—through coaching, recruiting, seminars, and corporate consulting, and a full library of blog posts that provide practical, no nonsense advice, inspiration and empowerment for women at every age and stage. www.9livesforwomen.com

1. Look Before You Leap!
A Two-Part Webinar
Part I: Motherhood Guilt or
Job Dissatisfaction?
Presenter:
Kathryn Sollmann, 9 Lives for Women

2. About Kathryn Sollmann
• Co-founded network of 9,000
women—recruiting, career
coaching, job search and
networking services
• One of first to focus on
“returning professional” women
• Coached hundreds of women on
other side of the “leap”—
women disenchanted with
volunteering & eager to return
to work
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3. About 9 Lives for Women
• Launched 9 Lives for Women in
2012
• Multi-channel blog site and
consulting services
• Help women navigate 9 work &
life stages from college to
retirement years
• Continue to coach women who
struggle to reenter workforce
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4. What Inspired My Work with Women
• In 1980 I heard Gloria Steinem’s
famous “You Can Have it All”
speech on my women’s college
campus
• I didn’t hear her say you can
have it all because someone is
going to give it to you
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5. Flexibility Today: 1 Step Forward, 2 Steps Backward
• Most companies have still not figured out how to
institutionalize flexibility
• Pockets here & there: nearly half of Aetna’s employees
work at home
• Yahoo moved backward and ordered all employees back
to the office
• In the near term work-life balance will continue to be
mostly one-off deals with individual employees.
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6. Work-Life FIT is Up to You
“Whether you have a supportive workplace culture or you
don’t, the responsibility for making it work comes down to
each of us,” says Brad Harrington, exec. director of Boston
College Center for Work & Family. “You can only blame your
employer for so long. Assuming you have marketable skills &
you have the courage of your convictions, at some point you
have to say, ‘it comes down to me to fix the situation.’”
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7. This webinar will help you decide…
• If you’re thinking of leaving the
workforce for the right reasons
• If you’ve considered not only the
positive side positives—but also
how leaving could negatively
impact your career, family and
life
• If complete work/life “balance”
is actually attainable in or out of
the workforce
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8. Who or What is Driving You Out of the Workforce?
Do you have a bad case of motherhood guilt?
• Pressure from family & friends
• Overblown news stories
• Recent study: daycare does not cause
behavior problems
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9. Why Are You Considering a Hiatus?
• Fueled by emotions?
• Short-term fix for longer-term issues?
• Problems that could be solved now?
POLL:
What’s your top reason?
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10. The Majority of Mothers Work at All Economic Levels
As of 2012, the Pew Research Study found that 7
out of 10 women work
• All these women are not raising
troubled kids
• Kryptonite can’t destroy mother-
child bond
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11. Myth that Working Moms Spend No Time with their Children
“Studies have shown that working moms spend 86% as much
time home with their children as employed Moms do. Working
parents, too, are part of their children’s educational, social &
emotional development.”
--From “Opt Out or Pushed Out: How the Press Covers Work/Family Conflicts” by Center for Worklife Law,
University of California
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12. Let Kids Be the Judge
Question posed to Mary Quigley, NYU Professor & author of blog on mothering adult
children (www.mothering21.com):
Women who leave the workforce often do so out of fear that
not being home will have a long-term negative effect on their
children. You teach a lot of young people—do you see a lot of
damage caused by working mothers? Have most working
women been positive or negative role models?
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13. Answer from Mary Quigley on Impact of Working Moms
“Most of the young people I teach have mothers who always
worked or returned to work at some point. I don’t hear
resentment about the fact that their mothers worked—in fact I
think they’re proud and appreciative that their mothers’
earnings helped the family with things like expensive college
tuitions.”
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14. Working to be A Role Model
• Both boys and girls benefit from working mother role model
• Girls need to see that women can take care of themselves
• Boys need to see that women can support a family, too
• Story of young boy who believes men are most powerful
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15. Work and Your Other Key Relationship
Will it be 1950 or 2013 in your partnership if you
don’t work?
• Power of money in a marriage
• How will your partnership
change?
• How will you define equality?
• How will you & your partner
define your role at home?
• Story: “What have you done all
day?”
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16. Face Your Honest Feelings About Your Current Work
• Lack of overall professional
ambition?
• More interested in “job” than
“career”?
• Industry wrong fit?
• Job function wrong fit?
FACT: Few women leave the workforce because
they hate their jobs.
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17. The Crux of the Matter: Why Do You Work?
POLL:
What’s the Main Reason
that You Leave the
House Each Day?
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18. Can You Afford Not to Work?
• Current comfort vs. future needs
• Can big expenses—e.g., desired home
renovations or college educations be
covered by one income?
• Retirement savings—need 20X final
household income before retirement
• Care of family members with limited
resources
• The “you never knows”—spouse job loss,
death, divorce
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19. Elder Care Cost for You & Your Parents
• National average hourly rate for home
health aides: $21 per hour
• National average monthly base rate in
assisted living community: $3,550
• National average daily rate for nursing
home: $222 - $228.
Source: MetLife Mature Market Institute, 2012
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20. What You Need for Retirement Security
Example: If your household income is $100K at
retirement, you need $2 million saved beyond
Social Security
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21. Alarming U.S. Retirement Savings Shortfalls
• 75% nearing retirement in 2010 had less
than $30K in their retirement accounts
• Almost half of middle class workers will
be poor or near poor in retirement,
living on food budget of about $5/day
• 32% of retired women have pensions vs.
55% of men—and women’s benefits
amount to about half of men’s
Source: “Our Ridiculous Approach to
Retirement”, New York Times, July 21, 2012
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22. We All Make Sacrifices for Our Children…
…but sacrificing long-term financial security may be one sacrifice too many.
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23. Why Do You Work? Career Goals
What do you want to achieve
before final retirement?
• Title or level
• Compensation
• Specific accomplishments for you or
others
• Industry recognition
• Fame
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24. How Would A Hiatus Set You Back?
• 93% of women want to return to work; only 74% succeed (source: prominent
demographer Sylvia Ann Hewlett)
• Women who stay out of workforce 3 or more years lose 37% of earning
power (source: www.momsrising.com)
• How could you keep a hand in your career?
• What resources would help you resume your career?
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25. Why Do You Work? Sense of Self
Confidence is the first thing that falls
through a gap in a resume…“I used to be
someone”
What drives your sense of self?
• Intellectual capability?
• Career success?
• Ability to help others?
Assess professional vs. personal factors
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26. What Would Your Stay-At-Home Elevator Speech Be?
I’m just at home taking care of the kids
vs
I’ve taken a five-year hiatus from the
workforce until my kids are in middle
school. In the meantime I’m
continuing to use my accounting
skills on the finance committee of my
town.
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27. Know Your Professional Persona
You can take a woman out of
professional work, but you
can’t always take the
professional work out of a
woman.
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28. Why Do You Work? Intellectual Fulfillment
Where will you find intellectual
stimulation at home?
• Type A vs. Type B stay-at-home Moms
• Board members vs. room mothers
• Intellectual outlets: educational courses,
freelance work, etc.
Thrill of no commute and neglected house
projects wears off
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29. Do What Makes YOU Happy
• When Mommy is happy, baby is happy
• “Feel guilty” time vs. “me time”
• Personal needs vs. family needs
Where will you be happiest in the short
and long-term—work or home?
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30. Don’t Leave Without It… A Solid Stay-At-Home Plan
How you will take care of
yourself…not just your family?
• Continued household help/child care to free
up “me time”?
• Intellectual pursuits
• Volunteer work special to you
• Freelance work to stay current
• Continuing education
• How to keep professional relationships alive
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31. The Myth of Work-Life Balance…In or Out of the Workforce
• Seesaws are always
uneven
• Workaholics vs.
volunteeraholics
• Manage expectations—
your current form of
“work” or home at high
end of seesaw at different
times
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32. A Professional Hiatus May Be the Right Decision for You If…
• You’re leaving on your own volition—not the pressure of
others
• You are truly unhappy with your job or career and you
need to regroup
• You will not jeopardize current or future financial
security
• You’ve made a professional case for flexibility in your
current job (Part II of webinar!) to no avail…and…
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33. A Professional Hiatus May Be the Right Decision for You If…
• You’ve exhausted flexible work options at other
companies
• Entrepreneurial ventures are not for you
• You have a solid “stay at home” plan for intellectual
stimulation, self-fulfillment and life partner equality.
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34. Part II of Look Before You Leap Webinar on April 30th, Noon EST
This “Exhaust Your Flexible Work Options” discussion will
help you:
• Determine first if flexibility is possible in your current job
• Research successful flexibility case studies
• Make a professional, business case for flexibility
• Write a compelling flexibility proposal
• Consider flexible alternatives beyond your current company,
including entrepreneurial ventures.
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35. Let’s Stay in Touch
Email me at ksollmann@9livesforwomen.com
or tweet at @9livesforwomen with additional
questions, comments and topics you would like
me to cover in Part II.
Many thanks for your participation!
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