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The Impact of Listening



            Facilitated by Cathi Hight
            Phone: (720) 304-0474
            Fax: (720) 304-8724
            www.hightperformance.com
Workshop Goals
             Explore the common
             challenges of
             communication.




OH-1                   Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Workshop Goals
              Understand
           Identify preferred
           individual listening
           approaches, its strengths
           and shortcomings.




OH-2                     Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Workshop Goals
                Understand
             Determine
         Understand the five
         different listening
         approaches.




OH-3                      Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Workshop Goals
                  Understand
               Determine
            Describe
       Recognize the benefits of
       using more than one
       listening approach.




OH-4                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Workshop Goals
                      Understand
                   Determine
               Describe
            Discover
       Practice using all five
       listening approaches in
       situational role-plays.



OH-5                               Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Workshop Agenda
1. What is Active Listening?
2. Going Deeper: Discover Your Personal
   Listening Approach
3. Developing Active Listening Skills
4. Transforming Difficult Listening Situations




OH-6                           Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Part 1: What is Active Listening?
 Listening seems like a basic skill
 Why do we need a course on listening?
 Active Listening is the practice of mindfully
  listening when someone is speaking




OH-7                            Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Time Spent Communicating


       Listening
         55%          Reading
                       13%

                       Writing
                        9%

                   Speaking
                     23%
OH-8                 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Communication Challenges
 Work with a partner
 Brainstorm ideas of what gets in the way
  of being an effective listener




OH-9                          Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Costs of Poor Listening
 What does poor listening cost?

 How does that impact us?




OH-10                         Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Listening and Hearing
 How are listening and hearing different?




OH-11                         Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Listening vs. Hearing

           Hearing            Listening

        The physical        The ability to
        ability to accept
                            put meaning
        and transmit
        sound waves         to that
        from the            transmission.
        eardrum to the
        brain.



OH-12                           Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
What Kind of Listener Are You?
 Rate your listening skills on page 4
 Total the rating values for each question
 Compare your total to the legend at the
  bottom of the page




OH-13                          Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Characteristics of the Active Listener
 Individual exercise:
        – Think of someone you communicate with well
        – What communication techniques do you both use?
        – How do you know you are each listening?
 Partner exercise:
        – Think of a topic you are passionate about
        – Have your partner practice being a poor listener
        – Switch roles




OH-14                                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Listening Is Affected by:
 Selection Attention
 Selective Interpretation
 Selective Retention




OH-15                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Verbal/Nonverbal Communications

        60
                                 55%
        50

        40            38%
                                 Body
        30
                               Language
        20           Tone of
        10
              7%      Voice
        0
             Words

OH-16                            Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Speaking and Listening Rates
                150
 We speak at _____ words per minute.
                500
 We listen at _____ words per minute.
                350
 That leaves _____ words per minute to:


             TUNE OUT!



OH-17                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Causes for “Tune-Out”
 Receiver’s purpose is different from
  sender’s purpose
 Understimulation
 Overstimulation
 Pace and delivery
 Lack of skill development




OH-18                          Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Part 2: Going Deeper: What’s Your
Preferred Listening Approach?

 Identify your preferred listening approach
 Explore the five listening approaches
 Understand each approach’s needs and
  communication expectations




OH-19                          Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Listening Approaches


        Appreciative    Feeling-Oriented

         Empathic

                          Comprehensive
        Fact-Oriented
                            Discerning

                             Evaluative


OH-20                           Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Matching Listening Approaches

        Focus
        Purpose and intent of the communication


        Motivation
        How we best accomplish that purpose.


        Behavioral Indicators
        Appropriate verbal and nonverbal signals that
        execute the strategy.
OH-21                                   Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Effective Listening




OH-22                 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Listening Graph
        Appreciative   Empathic    Comprehensive   Discerning         Evaluative
         Listening     Listening     Listening      Listening          Listening




OH-23                                                       Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Appreciative Listeners
To Be More Effective with Appreciative Listeners
   Be more upbeat
   Show enthusiasm
   Smile
   Show warmth
   Demonstrate acceptance
   Be relaxed
   Lighten up
   Use positive body language
   Use stories, pictures
   Change speaking pace
   Use humor
OH-24                              Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Empathic Listeners
To Be More Effective with Empathic Listeners
 Ask more open and
  feeling-oriented questions
 Show more empathy
 Don’t interrupt
 Feel more, think less
 Demonstrate sensitivity
 Be more intuitive
 Be more open-ended
 Maintain eye-contact
 Be responsive and open
  to questions

OH-25                             Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Discerning Listeners
To Be More Effective Discerning Listeners
 Get to the point, but give
  complete details
 Be methodical and organized
 Clarify more
 Minimize distractions
 Ask if they need you to
  elaborate more
 Verify if they feel something
  was missed
 Allow them to take notes
 Ask if you are meeting their needs
OH-26                                  Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Comprehensive Listeners
To Be More Effective Comprehensive Listeners
   Be logical
   Check in
   Connect ideas
   Provide evidence
   Summarize
   Number the main points
   Organize the presentation
   Tie back to their experiences
   Give more details,
    but be succinct

OH-27                               Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Evaluative Listeners
To Be More Effective Evaluative Listeners
 Lay out foundation       Think more in terms of
  and facts                 consequences
 Establish credibility    Relate to what is important
 Be concise                to them
 Be logical               Show value
 Provide an agenda
 Ask what they think
 Don’t shut down when
  they argue
 Know they will weigh
  pros and cons
OH-28                               Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Discuss Your Preferred Listening Approach

What listening approaches can you adopt or improve to better gather,
understand, or act on information:



Which listening approaches can you adopt or improve to strengthen
relationships?



Share this information with someone whose listening approach is
different than yours.




OH-29                                           Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Practice Flexing Your Listening Approach

 Work in groups of three
 Two people play the roles in the case
  study and one person is the observer
 Play out the scenario
 Observers: give feedback on
        – Which listening approach did each use?
        – Did either person flex his/her approach for
          the other?


OH-30                                   Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Part 3: Developing Active Listening Skills




        The function of listening is to
        understand what the other
        personal is saying…not necessarily
        to agree with it.



OH-31                           Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Listening Modes
             To figure out topic/intent


Empathic           Discerning                             Appreciative
• Feelings                                                • Sound
             To organize information
• Emotions                                                • Color
• Needs                                                   • Language
                 Comprehensive

                To make a decision

                     Evaluative

 OH-32                                    Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Listening Modes
Listening Approaches Used Effectively
      Politician                Lecture
                  Discerning       Evaluative
                                                          Discerning
Evaluative
                 Comprehensive
                                 Comprehensive


         Sales Presentation             Friend

 Evaluative                                            Discerning
                   Discerning
                                 Empathic

 Comprehensive                                     Comprehensive
 OH-33                                          Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Step 1: Prepare Yourself to Listen
 Give the sender your full attention
 Be open to listen fully
 Show your availability physically and
  mentally




OH-34                          Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
What Changes Should You Make?
 Think of some recent situations where you
  were unable to fully listen to someone
        – Name the situation in the right column
        – Consider what you could have done
          differently to be an effective listener
 Share your situations in a small group
 Offer ideas and support to one another



OH-35                                   Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Step 2: Listen for Accuracy
 Show the speaker that you heard what
  was said
 Test your understanding of messages
 Paraphrase what you heard
 Stay neutral




OH-36                       Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Practice Listening
 Work with a new partner
 Think of a recent problem you or your team
  encountered
 Take turns sharing the problem with your
  partner
 Remember: The listener is active and present,
  and paraphrases what has been said
 Discuss what it was like for being in both roles




OH-37                               Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Step 3: Listen for Empathy
 Listen for the emotion behind the
  message
 Be sincere in understanding how people
  feel
 State the conclusion of the speaker’s
  emotions
 Do not give advice



OH-38                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Practice Listening
 Work with a new partner
 Think of a recent situation that made you happy
  or excited
 Take turns sharing the story with your partner
 Be enthusiastic when you are the speaker
 Remember: The listener is active and picks up
  on the speaker’s emotions, and reflects back the
  emotion as well the content of what was heard
 Discuss what it was like for being in both roles



OH-39                             Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Step 4: Ask Open-Ended Questions
   Bring out more information from the speaker
   Maintain open dialog
   Make it about the speaker, and not you
   Ask neutral questions
   Remain silent while the speaker is talking
   Develop deeper understanding
   Be authentic about wanting to know more




OH-40                              Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Practice Listening
 Work with three or four others
 Share what you have learned or gained in
  this course so far
 When you are listening, ask open-ended
  questions
 Discuss what it was like when you were
  the speaker



OH-41                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Part 4: Transforming Difficult
    Listening Situations

 Techniques to improve difficult
  conversations




OH-42                          Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
What Makes Listening Difficult?

 We make judgments about people
 We form opinions without knowing all the
  details
 We protect our own interests
 We make choices in every situation




OH-43                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
What Assumptions Do You Make?

 Write down the names of three people
  who you have interacted with in the last
  week
 For each person, list at least five
  assumptions you made
 Consider how your assumptions influence
  the way you interact or listen



OH-44                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Step 1: Awareness and Reflection

 We don’t know when we stop listening
 We are aware of our feelings when we
  aren’t listening
 Take time to reframe your judgments
  when you want to tune someone out
 Separate facts from your opinions




OH-45                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Step 2: Exposing Your Thinking

 Check to see if your assumptions are
  accurate
 Be willing to be proven wrong
 “Seek first to understand, then be
  understood.” Stephen Covey




OH-46                         Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Step 3: Inquiring Into Another’s Thinking

 Help others uncover their underlying
  assumptions
 Act as a mediator with good intentions
 Use questions and remain neutral




OH-47                         Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Reflection

 Think of a recent unsatisfactory
  interaction where you were misunderstood
  or discounted
 Write down the conversation as you
  remember it on the right
 Write down on the left what you were
  thinking or feeling and did not
  communicate



OH-48                        Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Your Commitment to Action

 What will you do differently?




OH-49                             Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
There is no such thing as a bad listener.
         There are only people with inflexible
                    listening habits.




OH-50                              Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
Closing and Wrap Up

 Insights and comments

 Evaluation




OH-51                     Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.

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The Impact of Listening

  • 1. The Impact of Listening Facilitated by Cathi Hight Phone: (720) 304-0474 Fax: (720) 304-8724 www.hightperformance.com
  • 2. Workshop Goals Explore the common challenges of communication. OH-1 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 3. Workshop Goals Understand Identify preferred individual listening approaches, its strengths and shortcomings. OH-2 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 4. Workshop Goals Understand Determine Understand the five different listening approaches. OH-3 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 5. Workshop Goals Understand Determine Describe Recognize the benefits of using more than one listening approach. OH-4 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 6. Workshop Goals Understand Determine Describe Discover Practice using all five listening approaches in situational role-plays. OH-5 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 7. Workshop Agenda 1. What is Active Listening? 2. Going Deeper: Discover Your Personal Listening Approach 3. Developing Active Listening Skills 4. Transforming Difficult Listening Situations OH-6 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 8. Part 1: What is Active Listening?  Listening seems like a basic skill  Why do we need a course on listening?  Active Listening is the practice of mindfully listening when someone is speaking OH-7 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 9. Time Spent Communicating Listening 55% Reading 13% Writing 9% Speaking 23% OH-8 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 10. Communication Challenges  Work with a partner  Brainstorm ideas of what gets in the way of being an effective listener OH-9 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 11. Costs of Poor Listening  What does poor listening cost?  How does that impact us? OH-10 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 12. Listening and Hearing  How are listening and hearing different? OH-11 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 13. Listening vs. Hearing Hearing Listening The physical The ability to ability to accept put meaning and transmit sound waves to that from the transmission. eardrum to the brain. OH-12 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 14. What Kind of Listener Are You?  Rate your listening skills on page 4  Total the rating values for each question  Compare your total to the legend at the bottom of the page OH-13 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 15. Characteristics of the Active Listener  Individual exercise: – Think of someone you communicate with well – What communication techniques do you both use? – How do you know you are each listening?  Partner exercise: – Think of a topic you are passionate about – Have your partner practice being a poor listener – Switch roles OH-14 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 16. Listening Is Affected by:  Selection Attention  Selective Interpretation  Selective Retention OH-15 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 17. Verbal/Nonverbal Communications 60 55% 50 40 38% Body 30 Language 20 Tone of 10 7% Voice 0 Words OH-16 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 18. Speaking and Listening Rates 150  We speak at _____ words per minute. 500  We listen at _____ words per minute. 350  That leaves _____ words per minute to: TUNE OUT! OH-17 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 19. Causes for “Tune-Out”  Receiver’s purpose is different from sender’s purpose  Understimulation  Overstimulation  Pace and delivery  Lack of skill development OH-18 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 20. Part 2: Going Deeper: What’s Your Preferred Listening Approach?  Identify your preferred listening approach  Explore the five listening approaches  Understand each approach’s needs and communication expectations OH-19 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 21. Listening Approaches Appreciative Feeling-Oriented Empathic Comprehensive Fact-Oriented Discerning Evaluative OH-20 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 22. Matching Listening Approaches Focus Purpose and intent of the communication Motivation How we best accomplish that purpose. Behavioral Indicators Appropriate verbal and nonverbal signals that execute the strategy. OH-21 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 23. Effective Listening OH-22 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 24. Listening Graph Appreciative Empathic Comprehensive Discerning Evaluative Listening Listening Listening Listening Listening OH-23 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 25. Appreciative Listeners To Be More Effective with Appreciative Listeners  Be more upbeat  Show enthusiasm  Smile  Show warmth  Demonstrate acceptance  Be relaxed  Lighten up  Use positive body language  Use stories, pictures  Change speaking pace  Use humor OH-24 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 26. Empathic Listeners To Be More Effective with Empathic Listeners  Ask more open and feeling-oriented questions  Show more empathy  Don’t interrupt  Feel more, think less  Demonstrate sensitivity  Be more intuitive  Be more open-ended  Maintain eye-contact  Be responsive and open to questions OH-25 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 27. Discerning Listeners To Be More Effective Discerning Listeners  Get to the point, but give complete details  Be methodical and organized  Clarify more  Minimize distractions  Ask if they need you to elaborate more  Verify if they feel something was missed  Allow them to take notes  Ask if you are meeting their needs OH-26 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 28. Comprehensive Listeners To Be More Effective Comprehensive Listeners  Be logical  Check in  Connect ideas  Provide evidence  Summarize  Number the main points  Organize the presentation  Tie back to their experiences  Give more details, but be succinct OH-27 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 29. Evaluative Listeners To Be More Effective Evaluative Listeners  Lay out foundation  Think more in terms of and facts consequences  Establish credibility  Relate to what is important  Be concise to them  Be logical  Show value  Provide an agenda  Ask what they think  Don’t shut down when they argue  Know they will weigh pros and cons OH-28 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 30. Discuss Your Preferred Listening Approach What listening approaches can you adopt or improve to better gather, understand, or act on information: Which listening approaches can you adopt or improve to strengthen relationships? Share this information with someone whose listening approach is different than yours. OH-29 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 31. Practice Flexing Your Listening Approach  Work in groups of three  Two people play the roles in the case study and one person is the observer  Play out the scenario  Observers: give feedback on – Which listening approach did each use? – Did either person flex his/her approach for the other? OH-30 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 32. Part 3: Developing Active Listening Skills The function of listening is to understand what the other personal is saying…not necessarily to agree with it. OH-31 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 33. Listening Modes To figure out topic/intent Empathic Discerning Appreciative • Feelings • Sound To organize information • Emotions • Color • Needs • Language Comprehensive To make a decision Evaluative OH-32 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 34. Listening Modes Listening Approaches Used Effectively Politician Lecture Discerning Evaluative Discerning Evaluative Comprehensive Comprehensive Sales Presentation Friend Evaluative Discerning Discerning Empathic Comprehensive Comprehensive OH-33 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 35. Step 1: Prepare Yourself to Listen  Give the sender your full attention  Be open to listen fully  Show your availability physically and mentally OH-34 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 36. What Changes Should You Make?  Think of some recent situations where you were unable to fully listen to someone – Name the situation in the right column – Consider what you could have done differently to be an effective listener  Share your situations in a small group  Offer ideas and support to one another OH-35 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 37. Step 2: Listen for Accuracy  Show the speaker that you heard what was said  Test your understanding of messages  Paraphrase what you heard  Stay neutral OH-36 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 38. Practice Listening  Work with a new partner  Think of a recent problem you or your team encountered  Take turns sharing the problem with your partner  Remember: The listener is active and present, and paraphrases what has been said  Discuss what it was like for being in both roles OH-37 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 39. Step 3: Listen for Empathy  Listen for the emotion behind the message  Be sincere in understanding how people feel  State the conclusion of the speaker’s emotions  Do not give advice OH-38 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 40. Practice Listening  Work with a new partner  Think of a recent situation that made you happy or excited  Take turns sharing the story with your partner  Be enthusiastic when you are the speaker  Remember: The listener is active and picks up on the speaker’s emotions, and reflects back the emotion as well the content of what was heard  Discuss what it was like for being in both roles OH-39 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 41. Step 4: Ask Open-Ended Questions  Bring out more information from the speaker  Maintain open dialog  Make it about the speaker, and not you  Ask neutral questions  Remain silent while the speaker is talking  Develop deeper understanding  Be authentic about wanting to know more OH-40 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 42. Practice Listening  Work with three or four others  Share what you have learned or gained in this course so far  When you are listening, ask open-ended questions  Discuss what it was like when you were the speaker OH-41 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 43. Part 4: Transforming Difficult Listening Situations  Techniques to improve difficult conversations OH-42 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 44. What Makes Listening Difficult?  We make judgments about people  We form opinions without knowing all the details  We protect our own interests  We make choices in every situation OH-43 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 45. What Assumptions Do You Make?  Write down the names of three people who you have interacted with in the last week  For each person, list at least five assumptions you made  Consider how your assumptions influence the way you interact or listen OH-44 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 46. Step 1: Awareness and Reflection  We don’t know when we stop listening  We are aware of our feelings when we aren’t listening  Take time to reframe your judgments when you want to tune someone out  Separate facts from your opinions OH-45 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 47. Step 2: Exposing Your Thinking  Check to see if your assumptions are accurate  Be willing to be proven wrong  “Seek first to understand, then be understood.” Stephen Covey OH-46 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 48. Step 3: Inquiring Into Another’s Thinking  Help others uncover their underlying assumptions  Act as a mediator with good intentions  Use questions and remain neutral OH-47 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 49. Reflection  Think of a recent unsatisfactory interaction where you were misunderstood or discounted  Write down the conversation as you remember it on the right  Write down on the left what you were thinking or feeling and did not communicate OH-48 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 50. Your Commitment to Action  What will you do differently? OH-49 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 51. There is no such thing as a bad listener. There are only people with inflexible listening habits. OH-50 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.
  • 52. Closing and Wrap Up  Insights and comments  Evaluation OH-51 Presented by Hight Performance Group, Inc.