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Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW




                  www.yoursocialworker.com
   This presentation discusses domestic violence
    and impact on children. The content of this
    presentation may trigger distress. Please do what
    is necessary to take care of your needs during
    this presentation in the event of distress.




                                                www.yoursocialworker.com
Domestic Violence and Children
Ages and Stages
Culture
Piagetian Theory and our Role as Helpers
 Hostile, abusive or neglectful behaviour targeted at the
  child directly by parent or adult in the home
   Child’s direct exposure to acts of violence between adults
    in the home as in the case of seeing, hearing or smelling
    abusive behaviour

   Child’s indirect exposure to acts of violence as when seeing
    bruises, broken objects, distressed parent, blood or other
    evidence in the aftermath




                                                   www.yoursocialworker.com
Ways of Being Drawn In                Effects of Abuse
   Seeing it                            Physical injury
   Hearing it                           Death
   Being awakened by it                 Fright
   Being injured by it                  Being traumatized by it
   Being ripped from mother's arms      Sleep disturbances
   Having toys broken                   Eating disturbances
   Being born prematurely               Being colicky or sick
   Being hit while in mom's arms        Insecurity because of being
   Being thrown                          cared for by a traumatized mom
                                         Not responsive or cuddly

                                              Source:
                                              http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html



                                                                     www.yoursocialworker.com
Ways of Being Drawn In           Effects of Abuse

   Seeing it                       Acting out violently
   Hearing it                      Withdrawal
   Trying to stop altercation      Trouble with other kids
   Becoming abused themselves      Delayed toileting
   Being used as a physical        Eating problems
    weapon against the victim       Nervous, jumpy
   Being interrogated by           Sleep problems
    perpetrator about victims       Insecurity, fear and Depression
    activities
   Being held hostage by
    perpetrator

                                        Source:
                                        http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html




                                                                 www.yoursocialworker.com
Ways of Being Drawn In                   Effects of Abuse
   Seeing & hearing it                     Fear & insecurity
   Picking 1 parent to defend
                                            Low self esteem
   Physically intervening
                                            Withdrawal/depression
   Calling the police
   Running to neighbors for help           Running away
   Being used as a spy against             Early drug/alcohol use
    Mom                                     School problems
   Forced to participate in attack on      Bedwetting
    Mom                                     Sexual activity
   Being physically or sexually
                                            Becoming caretaker of adults
    abused to control Mom
   Being restricted from contact           Being embarrassed by one's
    with others                              family

                                                  Source:
                                                  http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html



                                                                       www.yoursocialworker.com
Ways of Being Drawn In                   Effects of Abuse
   Killing/trying to kill perpetrator      School problems
   Trying to stop the abuse                Social problems
                                            Sexual activity
   Hitting parent or siblings              Shamed & embarrassed
   Becoming physically abused              Truancy
   Being used as a spy                     Super-achiever at school
   Being used as a confidante              Tendency to get serious
                                             relationships too early to escape
   Being coerced by perpetrator to          home
    be abusive to mom                       Depression
                                            Suicide
                                            Alcohol/drug use
                                            Confusion about gender roles

                                                  Source:
                                                  http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html




                                                                        www.yoursocialworker.com
Effects Specific to Boys              Effects Specific to Girls

   Learning that males are violent      Learning that male violence is
   Learning to disrespect women          normal
   Using violence in his own            Learning that women don't get
    relationships                         respect
   Confusion or insecurity about        Accepting violence in her own
    being a man                           relationships
   Attacking parents or siblings        Embarrassed about being
                                          female
                                         Becoming pregnant



                                                 Source:
                                                 http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html




                                                                      www.yoursocialworker.com
   Thinking constantly about the traumatic event.
   Having nightmares.
   Avoiding places, people, or activities that re-mind them
    of the event.
   Losing interest in doing things that they liked before.
   Feeling alone, empty, sad, anxious, or uncaring.
   Becoming irritable, angry, and easily startled.




                                                 www.yoursocialworker.com
   Behavioral, social, and emotional problems
    ◦ higher levels of aggression, anger, hostility,
      oppositional behavior, and disobedience; fear, anxiety,
      withdrawal, and depression; poor peer, sibling, and
      social relationships; low self-esteem.




                                                  www.yoursocialworker.com
   Cognitive and attitudinal problems
    ◦ lower cognitive functioning, poor school performance,
      lack of conflict resolution skills, limited problem-solving
      skills, acceptance of violent behaviors and attitudes,
      belief in rigid gender stereotypes and male privilege.




                                                     www.yoursocialworker.com
   Long-term problems
    ◦ higher levels of adult depression and trauma
      symptoms, increased tolerance for and use of violence
      in adult relationships




                                                www.yoursocialworker.com
   Difficulty with trust
   Difficulty forming relationships
   Mental health issues -
    anxiety/depression/PTSD
   Shame, Embarrassment
   Desensitization to violence and abuse which
    may result in an inability in both victim and
    perpetrator to assess risk.




                                           www.yoursocialworker.com
Culture: The system of shared beliefs,
 values, customs, behaviours, and artifacts
 that the members of society use to cope
 with their world and with one another, and
 that are transmitted from generation to
 generation through (social) learning.
  (Italics mine)


http://www.umanitoba.ca/faculties/arts/anthropology/courses/122/module1/culture.htm
                                                                                   l




                                                                      www.yoursocialworker.com
…shared beliefs, values, customs,
                                          Family
behaviours, and artifacts that the
members of society use to cope
with their world and with one
another…




                              Immediate             Larger
                              Community             Community




                                                   www.yoursocialworker.com
Infants and toddlers               Family
Preschoolers
School age
Adolescence




                       Immediate            Larger
                       Community            Community




                                            www.yoursocialworker.com
   Patriarchally organized families
   Isolation,
   Fear of racism, (I’m already different
    enough)
   Language barriers,
   Uncertain immigration status,
   Pressures to keep the marriage going
   Children as chattel
   View of “Authorities”
A schema is the basic building block of intelligence and
serves as a representation of an aspect of the world;
When new information that challenges a schema is
encountered, the person goes through a process of
disequilibrium (cognitive dissonance) until the challenge to
the schema is resolved.
The disequilibrium is resolved through the processes of
assimilation and accommodation.




                                                      www.yoursocialworker.com
Assimilation

Schema:             New experience:      New schema:
Dog = 4 legs       Dog licks and barks   Dog = 4 legs
           Tail      disequilibrium                 Tail
  Floppy ears                              Floppy ears
          furry                                   Furry
                                                  Licks
                                                  Barks




                                             www.yoursocialworker.com
Accommodation
Schema:                New                 New Schema
Dog = 4 legs        experience:            CAT! = 4 legs
          Tail        Animal                         Tail
        Ears          meows!                       Ears
       Furry       disequilibrium                  Furry
       Licks                                       Licks
       Barks                                      Barks
                                    Meow
                                                 Meows




                                              www.yoursocialworker.com
Resolution?
(Depends upon experience)

Assimilation:
I get bullied – I'm not safe
anywhere; I am not of value…

Accommodation:
Someone intervenes and keeps
me safe – Violence is
unacceptable and I am of
value…




                     www.yoursocialworker.com
   We are here to help keep people safe and to resolve the
    disequilibrium:

    ◦ Violence is unacceptable regardless of culture.
    ◦ Everyone has the right to safety and security of the person.
    ◦ Conflict resolution is a skill that can be taught/learned.
    ◦ Resolving dysfunctional cognitive schema in favour of functional
      cognitive schema.




                                                              www.yoursocialworker.com
   Intervening on behalf of children subject to
    domestic violence with due consideration to
    cultural variables.
   [Session I–Thursday November 22: 2:45-4:15 pm]

    Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW




                                          www.yoursocialworker.com

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Domestic Violence and Children in a Multi-Cultural Context

  • 1. Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 2. This presentation discusses domestic violence and impact on children. The content of this presentation may trigger distress. Please do what is necessary to take care of your needs during this presentation in the event of distress. www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 3. Domestic Violence and Children Ages and Stages Culture Piagetian Theory and our Role as Helpers
  • 4.  Hostile, abusive or neglectful behaviour targeted at the child directly by parent or adult in the home  Child’s direct exposure to acts of violence between adults in the home as in the case of seeing, hearing or smelling abusive behaviour  Child’s indirect exposure to acts of violence as when seeing bruises, broken objects, distressed parent, blood or other evidence in the aftermath www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 5. Ways of Being Drawn In Effects of Abuse  Seeing it  Physical injury  Hearing it  Death  Being awakened by it  Fright  Being injured by it  Being traumatized by it  Being ripped from mother's arms  Sleep disturbances  Having toys broken  Eating disturbances  Being born prematurely  Being colicky or sick  Being hit while in mom's arms  Insecurity because of being  Being thrown cared for by a traumatized mom  Not responsive or cuddly Source: http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 6. Ways of Being Drawn In Effects of Abuse  Seeing it  Acting out violently  Hearing it  Withdrawal  Trying to stop altercation  Trouble with other kids  Becoming abused themselves  Delayed toileting  Being used as a physical  Eating problems weapon against the victim  Nervous, jumpy  Being interrogated by  Sleep problems perpetrator about victims  Insecurity, fear and Depression activities  Being held hostage by perpetrator Source: http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 7. Ways of Being Drawn In Effects of Abuse  Seeing & hearing it  Fear & insecurity  Picking 1 parent to defend  Low self esteem  Physically intervening  Withdrawal/depression  Calling the police  Running to neighbors for help  Running away  Being used as a spy against  Early drug/alcohol use Mom  School problems  Forced to participate in attack on  Bedwetting Mom  Sexual activity  Being physically or sexually  Becoming caretaker of adults abused to control Mom  Being restricted from contact  Being embarrassed by one's with others family Source: http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 8. Ways of Being Drawn In Effects of Abuse  Killing/trying to kill perpetrator  School problems  Trying to stop the abuse  Social problems  Sexual activity  Hitting parent or siblings  Shamed & embarrassed  Becoming physically abused  Truancy  Being used as a spy  Super-achiever at school  Being used as a confidante  Tendency to get serious relationships too early to escape  Being coerced by perpetrator to home be abusive to mom  Depression  Suicide  Alcohol/drug use  Confusion about gender roles Source: http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 9. Effects Specific to Boys Effects Specific to Girls  Learning that males are violent  Learning that male violence is  Learning to disrespect women normal  Using violence in his own  Learning that women don't get relationships respect  Confusion or insecurity about  Accepting violence in her own being a man relationships  Attacking parents or siblings  Embarrassed about being female  Becoming pregnant Source: http://www.familyrefugecenter.com/effecton.html www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 10. Thinking constantly about the traumatic event.  Having nightmares.  Avoiding places, people, or activities that re-mind them of the event.  Losing interest in doing things that they liked before.  Feeling alone, empty, sad, anxious, or uncaring.  Becoming irritable, angry, and easily startled. www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 11. Behavioral, social, and emotional problems ◦ higher levels of aggression, anger, hostility, oppositional behavior, and disobedience; fear, anxiety, withdrawal, and depression; poor peer, sibling, and social relationships; low self-esteem. www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 12. Cognitive and attitudinal problems ◦ lower cognitive functioning, poor school performance, lack of conflict resolution skills, limited problem-solving skills, acceptance of violent behaviors and attitudes, belief in rigid gender stereotypes and male privilege. www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 13. Long-term problems ◦ higher levels of adult depression and trauma symptoms, increased tolerance for and use of violence in adult relationships www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 14. Difficulty with trust  Difficulty forming relationships  Mental health issues - anxiety/depression/PTSD  Shame, Embarrassment  Desensitization to violence and abuse which may result in an inability in both victim and perpetrator to assess risk. www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 15. Culture: The system of shared beliefs, values, customs, behaviours, and artifacts that the members of society use to cope with their world and with one another, and that are transmitted from generation to generation through (social) learning. (Italics mine) http://www.umanitoba.ca/faculties/arts/anthropology/courses/122/module1/culture.htm l www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 16. …shared beliefs, values, customs, Family behaviours, and artifacts that the members of society use to cope with their world and with one another… Immediate Larger Community Community www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 17. Infants and toddlers Family Preschoolers School age Adolescence Immediate Larger Community Community www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 18. Patriarchally organized families  Isolation,  Fear of racism, (I’m already different enough)  Language barriers,  Uncertain immigration status,  Pressures to keep the marriage going  Children as chattel  View of “Authorities”
  • 19. A schema is the basic building block of intelligence and serves as a representation of an aspect of the world; When new information that challenges a schema is encountered, the person goes through a process of disequilibrium (cognitive dissonance) until the challenge to the schema is resolved. The disequilibrium is resolved through the processes of assimilation and accommodation. www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 20. Assimilation Schema: New experience: New schema: Dog = 4 legs Dog licks and barks Dog = 4 legs Tail disequilibrium Tail Floppy ears Floppy ears furry Furry Licks Barks www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 21. Accommodation Schema: New New Schema Dog = 4 legs experience: CAT! = 4 legs Tail Animal Tail Ears meows! Ears Furry disequilibrium Furry Licks Licks Barks Barks Meow Meows www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 22. Resolution? (Depends upon experience) Assimilation: I get bullied – I'm not safe anywhere; I am not of value… Accommodation: Someone intervenes and keeps me safe – Violence is unacceptable and I am of value… www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 23. We are here to help keep people safe and to resolve the disequilibrium: ◦ Violence is unacceptable regardless of culture. ◦ Everyone has the right to safety and security of the person. ◦ Conflict resolution is a skill that can be taught/learned. ◦ Resolving dysfunctional cognitive schema in favour of functional cognitive schema. www.yoursocialworker.com
  • 24. Intervening on behalf of children subject to domestic violence with due consideration to cultural variables.  [Session I–Thursday November 22: 2:45-4:15 pm] Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW www.yoursocialworker.com