This is the slide that has been updated for our 1-19-11 webinar.

1. BLOOM!
How to Escape the Doom Cycle and Start to Bloom
1 © Mass Ignition

2. There is
Good News and
there is Bad News
for All Marriages
2 © Mass Ignition

3. Bad News
Marriages were built to Fail
3 © Mass Ignition

4. Good News
Marriages were designed for
your fullness of life and for
God’s glory
4 © Mass Ignition

5. Whether you are fully aware of it or not, you
are in one cycle or the other
Doom Vs.
Bloom
Cycle Cycle
5 © Mass Ignition

6. The Challenge:
Most people don’t know how to
effectively assess whether they are in
Doom or Bloom….why?
6 © Mass Ignition

7. Trusts in the LORD
Delights in the law of the LORD
On his law meditates day and night
Leaves are always green
Never fails to bear fruit
Does not wither in the heat
Does not walk in the counsel of the
wicked
Heart is deceitful above all things
7 © Mass Ignition

8. Question: How do you
know the health of your
marriage?
8 © Mass Ignition

9. Brian Rhen:
Rhen:
• Pastor
• Marriage Coach
• Married
• Kids
9 © Mass Ignition

10. 5 Myths That
May Doom
Your Marriage!
10 © Mass Ignition

11. Myth #1: Wedding vows are the
most important commitment you
make
11 © Mass Ignition

12. Myth #2: Most spouses know the
other’s needs
12 © Mass Ignition

13. Myth #3: Certain things cannot
be forgiven
13 © Mass Ignition

14. Myth #4: Communication gets
better over time
14 © Mass Ignition

15. Myth #5: God’s purposes will
naturally evolve
15 © Mass Ignition

16. Myth #1: Wedding vows are the
most important commitment you
make (The Uncertain Couple)
16 © Mass Ignition

17. COMMIT To “sacrificial” LOVE
This is my command: Love (agape) each other. John 15:17
DAILY
YEARLY
SEASONALLY
17 © Mass Ignition

18. COMMIT TO “sacrificial” LOVE
5 Love Languages
-WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT
-QUALITY TIME
-GIFTS
-ACTS OF SERVICE
-PHYSICAL TOUCH
18 © Mass Ignition

19. CHECKUP QUESTION #1
How often do you re-commit to
sacrificially loving?
19 © Mass Ignition

20. complete
Committed to love?
wife
room to improve
room to improve complete
husband
20 © Mass Ignition

21. Myth #2: Most spouses know the
other’s needs (The Card Carrying
Couple)
21 © Mass Ignition

22. CHERISH & RESPECT
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself,
and the wife must respect her husband. Eph. 5:33
with
cherish
he she
responds responds without
respect
with
respect he she
reacts reacts
© Mass Ignition
without
22
cherish

23. CHECKUP QUESTION #2
What is the degree you are
currently cherishing (your
wife) and respecting (your
husband?)
23 © Mass Ignition

24. respecting
Cherished and
wife
Respected?
room to improve
room to improve cherishing
husband
24 © Mass Ignition

25. Myth #3: Certain things cannot
be forgiven (The Startup Couple)
25 © Mass Ignition

26. BE GRACIOUS & FORGIVE
Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you
may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:13
Grace leaves Forgiveness
space for releases
error
“an attitude” “a process”
26 © Mass Ignition

27. CHECKUP QUESTION #3
How capable are you of being
gracious and of forgiving?
27 © Mass Ignition

28. complete
Gracious and Forgiving?
wife
room to improve
room to improve complete
husband
28 © Mass Ignition

29. Myth #4: Communication gets
better over time (The Yelling
Couple)
29 © Mass Ignition

30. CHOOSE THE RIGHT WORDS
Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.
James 1:19
Argument REACTING the other
Destructive offensive, names, sarcasm, violent = scarring
Disagreement REACTING issue
Harsh defensive, personalities arise = separating
Normal dialogue RESPONDING each other
Kind attentive, encouraging = supporting
30 © Mass Ignition

31. CHOOSE THE RIGHT WORDS
CIRCUMSTANCE
THOUGHTS
EMOTIONS
Hurt, Fear, Want, Joy
3 sec.
with self with God
REACT RESPOND
“FLESH” “SPIRIT”
31 © Mass Ignition

32. CHOOSE THE RIGHT WORDS
REACT: “STAND OFF” REACT: “TELL OFF”
RESPOND
“GRACE
&
TRUTH”
REACT: “GIVE UP” REACT: “HOLD ON ”
32 © Mass Ignition

33. CHOOSE THE RIGHT WORDS
REACT: “STAND OFF” REACT: “TELL OFF”
Listen
Clarify Thoughts
Identify Feelings
Right Tone, Time, Words
Find Compromise
REACT: “GIVE UP” REACT: “HOLD ON ”
33 © Mass Ignition

34. CHECKUP QUESTION #4
Are you using the right words
in your communication?
34 © Mass Ignition

35. Myth #5: God’s purposes will
naturally evolve (The Chaotic
Churchgoing Couple)
35 © Mass Ignition

36. SEEK A GREATER PURPOSE
The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me. Psalm 138:8
People
seldom hit
what they
do not
aim at.”
Thoreau
36 © Mass Ignition

37. SEEK A GREATER PURPOSE
The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me. Psalm 138:8
•Marriage Purpose Statement
•Marriage Verse
•Values (being)
•Goals (doing)
•Dreams
•Prayer
37 © Mass Ignition

38. CHECKUP QUESTION #5
How purposeful is
your marriage?
38 © Mass Ignition

39. BLOOM!
Where are you?
39 © Mass Ignition

40. FINAL CHECKUP
Rank each on a scale of 1(weak) - 5(strong)
___Commit to Love
___
___Cherish & Respect
___
___Be
___ Gracious & Forgive
___Choose the Right Words
___
___Seek a Greater Purpose
___
40 © Mass Ignition

41. Do you want to grow in
any of these five areas?
41 © Mass Ignition

42. Bloom!
A 5-WEEK TUNE-UP FOR ANY MARRIAGE
42 © Mass Ignition

43. • 5-weeks of live webinars (1 per week)
• 1-year of group tele-coaching (1 per month)
tele-
• Lifetime access to recorded materials
(including updated materials)
• 5-weeks of follow-up e-course (1 per
week)
43 © Mass Ignition

44. • Convenient – take from home
• Repeatable – review anytime
• Normally $625 for 5-weeks
• Only $249 for signing up today
• < $50 per session per couple
• 30-day money-back guarantee
44 © Mass Ignition

45. • 15% of proceeds donated
• Wings of Hope – radio-based marriage
ministry in Malawi
45 © Mass Ignition

46. When is Bloom?
5 Wednesdays
Time: 7:30 PM – 9:00 PST
Starts February 2, 2011
February 9, February 16
March 2, March 9
46 © Mass Ignition

47. Sign up today
http://bit.ly/blkYPM
47 © Mass Ignition